This document discusses interpersonal effectiveness and provides tips to improve interpersonal skills. It defines interpersonal effectiveness as matching behavioral consequences to intentions. It advises clarifying wants from interactions, identifying what's needed to get results, and balancing priorities versus demands. The document provides acronyms to GIVE and FAST to maintain relationships and self-respect. It recommends practicing interpersonal skills with others, getting feedback, and modifying behavior to assess consequences. Building skills requires identifying needs, practicing, evaluating progress, and teaching others.

1. Interpersonal Effectiveness
The degree to which the consequences
of behaviour match intentions

2. W hat is interpersonal effectiveness?
The skills that help us to:
• Attend to relationships
• Balance priorities vs. demands
• Balance the “wants” and “shoulds”
• Build a sense of mastery and self-respect
Your objective is to:
• Clarify what you want from interactions with other people
• Identify what you need to do to get the results you want

3. Dear Man Helps you to meet your objective
Describe current situation
Express feelings and opinions
Assert yourself by stating what you want
Reward the person – what will they get out of the relationship
Mindful of the objectives
Appear effective and competent
Negotiate alternative solutions

4. The Relationship
• How important is this relationship to me?
• What do I what this person to feel about me after this
interaction?
• What do I need to do, in order to keep this relationship?
Keep the relationship by using GIVE:
Gentle manner without attack or threat
Interest in the other person
Validate the other person without judging
Easy manner (use a little humour)

5. Self-respect
• What do I want to feel about myself after this interaction?
• What do I have to do in order to feel that way about
myself?
Keep your self-respect by using FAST:
Fair to myself and others
No Apologies for being alive
Stick to values (not do anything I’ll regret later)
Truthful without excuses or exaggeration

6. Improve your interpersonal skills
By interacting with others

7. Interact with
someone
Modify Assess the
behaviour consequences
Obtain
Reflect
feedback

8. Tips
For enhancing your interpersonal skills
• Identify the need for the specific skill.
• Have a clear idea of what the skill is.
• Practice your skill over and over again.
• Evaluate your progress.
• Practice the skill until it feels natural.
• Have a support system.
• Teach interpersonal skills to others.

9. The next step in building an authentic brand
Complete the Interpersonal Effectiveness
Worksheet