The document discusses collaboration with and support of parents of deaf and hard of hearing children. It makes several key points: 1) Parents experience crisis after learning of their child's diagnosis and need therapeutic help and support, not criticism, as they adjust. 2) Counselors should understand the emotional stages parents go through, from shock to acceptance, and accept the parents for who they are. 3) Providing psychoeducation to parents on normal development, communication, coping strategies, and supporting their child is important. 4) Support groups allowing parents to share experiences over multiple meetings provide effective non-professional counseling.

1. of deaf
and hard of hearing
children
Joanna Kosmalowa
Collaboration with parents

2. General assumptions
 Parents of deaf and hard of hearing children love their
children and want for them all the best.
If they lose the way – they do it by incident
and they are unconscious of doing so.
 After the diagnosis the parents are those who are in crisis,
not the children; their life has changed irrevocably and they
need support and therapeutic help.
 Despite your profession, keep in mind that your role is to
help and support the parents.

3. What do you have to know
about the grief?
 There are certain stages in people’s
reaction to crisis: shock, recognition,
denial, acknowledgement, and – finally
constructive action.
 In some ways the response cycle is
a cleansing process.

4. First - try to understand
the emotional state
 Observe your clients and make it clear
where the parents are in the response
cycle.
 Accept the parents – who they are and how
they cope with their problems. Be aware
that all their feelings are natural, useful,
and above all necessary.

5. Second – you are a
professional
 Parents do not know many things you are
well aware of.
 The children are deaf or hard of hearing but
their parents can be „mute” and totally
confused. It is possible – they have lost
their competence to raise their children.
 You are the one prepared to cope with
this / you have to be.

6. Do not only act but
communicate Explain what are you doing and the
purpose.
 Inform openly what are your expectations
of parents.
 Set goals, for parents but also for yourself.
Do it in colaboration with parents.
 The language you use should be as simple
as possible. Check whether you are
well understood.

7. How to act?
 From time to time stop talking. Focus on
listening, it can be more effective and helpful
than instructing, much more – than
admonishing.
 Work on positive attitude towards parents.
The more positive your expectations will be,
the more likely you will get positive response
from the parents and the children.

8. Helping parents
 Parents need your full support before
specialists
start working with their child.
 Parents need help that accompanies
their child’s therapy.

9. What is the essence of
parents counselling and
guidance?
Parents need to find
their own way
for developing the family life.
Also how to meet the individual needs
of each family member.

10. Family Problems
 Who works
with children?
 Fathers needed
 Family in the
community
 Hearing children

11. A helper is somebody
who ....
 Can listen to parents
 Feels empathy
 Is conscious of his own feelings
and willing to express them
 Accepts parents despite
their needs and expectations
 Gives positive reinfoircements

12. A helper is somebody
who ....
 Understands family problems
 Is a source of knowledge
 Is sensitive; recognises and helps to recognise
individual problems of the family
 Models parents’ behaviours
 Helps parents think in a realistic way

13. Evaluation? – Yes
Do not criticize. Do not judge.
Appreciate!

14. Think about yourself
• You as a helper are equally
important
• Be aware of your
possibilities
• Set the limits
• Communicate
in a constructive way

15. At the beginning
of the family therapy
 3 – 5 „obligatory” meetings with a psychologist
who is a therapist as well
 in the group – 2-3 families
 individual meetings – 1 family
 Psychotherapy
 Teaching parents
(psychological education)

16. normal development and normal psychological patterns
controlling human’s behaviour
self cognition and getting to know others
mechanisms of human actions
means of coping with various problems
supporting child’s development.
Psychoeducation means
education
concerning

17.  How can parents accept themselves
 How to believe in ones own capabilities
 How to perceive and express feelings, especially when the
feelings are difficult to cope with
 How to establish the parent – child relation
 How to communicate
What do we educate
parents in?
„Cold knowledge” aquired intelectually to a much lesser degree influences the real
behaviour of a person than so called „hot knowledge” based on one’s own experience.

18.  A very effective form of non-professional
counselling
 30 – 40 meetings of support group for parents (a 1 year program)
should be the foundation of the therapy system for parents with
hearing impaired children
Support group for parents

19. What counts
is not doing a lot
but putting
a lot of love
in what we do.
Mother Teresa from Calcutta

20. THANK YOU
FOR YOUR
ATTENTION