DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
DIFFICULT
Definition: hard to do, hard to deal with,
hard to carry out, hard to make out
(Merriam Webster)
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Is
DIFFICULTY
real
or
imaginary?
When something
or
someone
is “difficult”
what do you experience?
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
PONDERABLE
Conflicts have value.
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
All behaviors have their own
usefulness.
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Differences challenge status quo
and
provide a platform for change.
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Conflicts form the bridge between
stability and change.
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Conflicts serve as feedback.
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Conflicts form the basis of
creativity and innovation .
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Conflicts clear up assumptions
and build stronger relationships
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Differences mean
you are in the flow of life – a participant, not an
observer.
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Disturbances & differences
are essential for self growth
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Strategies in managing conflicts
1. Withdrawal – lose/lose
2. Forcing – win/lose
3. Smoothing – no win/no lose
4. Compromising – lose/win
5. Confronting – win/win
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
The Turtle
 Withdraws into shell to avoid conflicts
 Gives up personal goals and relationships
 Stays away from conflicting issues and people involved
• Attitude : “I’ll withdrawal rather than face the issue”.
• Position: Lose-Lose
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
The Shark
 Overpower others forcing them to accept their
resolution.
 Goals – important; Relationships – not important
 Will get what they want…at any price!
 Attack :“Attack, overpower, overwhelm and
intimidate”!
 Position: Win-Lose
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
The Teddy Bear
• Relationships – important; Goals – not much
• Conflicts damage relationships
 Want to be liked
• Attitude : “I’ll let you have your way so you’ll like
me.”
• Position: Lose-Win
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
The Fox
 Moderate concern for goals and others
 Compromises
 Strive for agreement in conflict
 Attitude : “To settle things, I’ll give up this and you
give up that.”
 Position: No-Win, No-Lose
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
The Owl
 Values goals and relationships
 Collaboration
 Conflict improves relationships & eases tension
 Important: Everyone is pleased with outcome
 Attitude : “I’m satisfied once conflict is completely
resolved”.
 Position: Win-Win
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Ponderables about Conflicts:
Conflicts have value.
• All behaviors have their own usefulness.
• Differences challenge status quo and provide a platform for
change.
• Conflicts form the bridge between stability and change.
• Conflicts serve as feedback.
• Conflicts form the basis of creativity and innovation .
• Conflicts clear up assumptions and build stronger relationships
• Differences mean you are in the flow of life – a participant, not
an observer.
• Disturbances and differences are essential for self growth.
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Few basic points in dealing with Difficult people:
1. Address the issue, not the person.
2. Use passive voice. E.g. “ the attitude towards the
work is not working towards the goals”
3. Listen patiently till you sense the issue.
4. Talk to people, not about people.
5. Be specific in your communication.
6. Set future expectations.
7. Create a secure space to absorb conflict and
convert to useful behavior.
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
By
the
way
Who am I?
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
What I
take home!!
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
THANK YOU
for
PARTICIPATION
Like us on http://www.facebook.com/welearnindia
Follow us @ https://twitter.com/Welearnindia
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Join our group @ http://www.linkedin.com/in/welingkardlp

Dealing With Difficult People

  • 1.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE DIFFICULT Definition: hard to do, hard to deal with, hard to carry out, hard to make out (Merriam Webster)
  • 2.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Is DIFFICULTY real or imaginary?
  • 3.
    When something or someone is “difficult” whatdo you experience? DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
  • 4.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE PONDERABLE Conflicts have value.
  • 5.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE All behaviors have their own usefulness.
  • 6.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Differences challenge status quo and provide a platform for change.
  • 7.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Conflicts form the bridge between stability and change.
  • 8.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Conflicts serve as feedback.
  • 9.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Conflicts form the basis of creativity and innovation .
  • 10.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Conflicts clear up assumptions and build stronger relationships
  • 11.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Differences mean you are in the flow of life – a participant, not an observer.
  • 12.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Disturbances & differences are essential for self growth
  • 13.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Strategies in managing conflicts 1. Withdrawal – lose/lose 2. Forcing – win/lose 3. Smoothing – no win/no lose 4. Compromising – lose/win 5. Confronting – win/win
  • 14.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE The Turtle  Withdraws into shell to avoid conflicts  Gives up personal goals and relationships  Stays away from conflicting issues and people involved • Attitude : “I’ll withdrawal rather than face the issue”. • Position: Lose-Lose
  • 15.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE The Shark  Overpower others forcing them to accept their resolution.  Goals – important; Relationships – not important  Will get what they want…at any price!  Attack :“Attack, overpower, overwhelm and intimidate”!  Position: Win-Lose
  • 16.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE The Teddy Bear • Relationships – important; Goals – not much • Conflicts damage relationships  Want to be liked • Attitude : “I’ll let you have your way so you’ll like me.” • Position: Lose-Win
  • 17.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE The Fox  Moderate concern for goals and others  Compromises  Strive for agreement in conflict  Attitude : “To settle things, I’ll give up this and you give up that.”  Position: No-Win, No-Lose
  • 18.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE The Owl  Values goals and relationships  Collaboration  Conflict improves relationships & eases tension  Important: Everyone is pleased with outcome  Attitude : “I’m satisfied once conflict is completely resolved”.  Position: Win-Win
  • 19.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Ponderables about Conflicts: Conflicts have value. • All behaviors have their own usefulness. • Differences challenge status quo and provide a platform for change. • Conflicts form the bridge between stability and change. • Conflicts serve as feedback. • Conflicts form the basis of creativity and innovation . • Conflicts clear up assumptions and build stronger relationships • Differences mean you are in the flow of life – a participant, not an observer. • Disturbances and differences are essential for self growth.
  • 20.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE Few basic points in dealing with Difficult people: 1. Address the issue, not the person. 2. Use passive voice. E.g. “ the attitude towards the work is not working towards the goals” 3. Listen patiently till you sense the issue. 4. Talk to people, not about people. 5. Be specific in your communication. 6. Set future expectations. 7. Create a secure space to absorb conflict and convert to useful behavior.
  • 21.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE By the way Who am I?
  • 22.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE What I take home!!
  • 23.
    DEALING WITH DIFFICULTPEOPLE THANK YOU for PARTICIPATION
  • 24.
    Like us onhttp://www.facebook.com/welearnindia Follow us @ https://twitter.com/Welearnindia Watch interesting videos on http://www.youtube.com/WelingkarDLP Discover our PPTs on http://www.slideshare.net/WelingkarDLP Read Articles @ http://welearnindia.wordpress.com/ Join our group @ http://www.linkedin.com/in/welingkardlp