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NEGOTIATION &
SELLING SKILLS
TOPIC : - DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE & OPPOSITION
- DEALING WITH OPPOSITION
~ DR. ASMAT ARA KHAN
1
NEGOTIATION ? & SELLING ?
WHAT IS NEGOTIATION ?
 Negotiating is a process of exchanging offers and
counter offers - “exchange of concessions” – for arriving at a
compromise by which both parties reach to an agreed positions &
outcomes.
WHAT IS SELLING ?
 Selling is a process of flow of goods or services or ideas
from Seller to Buyer in exchange of money.
2
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
AND OPPOSITION
DIFFICULT PEOPLE :
- Difficult people do exist everywhere.
- They come in every variety and no workplace is without them.
- It depends on your self-esteem, your self-confidence & your
professional skills & courage to find out that how difficult is the
person to deal/handle.
- Dealing with difficult people is much tougher when they are
attacking on your self-image or your face.
3
DIFFERENT TYPES OF DIFFICULT
PEOPLE
.
4
DIFFICULT
PEOPLE
EXPLODER
SHERMAN TANK
COMPLAINER
CLAMWET BLANKET
KNOW-IT-ALL
STALLER
THE “SHERMAN TANK”
 Sherman Tank’s behavior is synonymous to Attack.
 They behave in an abusive, unexpected, intimidating and
contemptuous manner and try their best to leave their victims on the
defensive mode, feeling overwhelmed and powerless.
Sherman Tanks have a strong and driving desire to prove to
themselves and to others that they are always right.
Example : Britishers
5
HOW TO COPE UP WITH “SHERMAN
TANKS”
 You must stand up to them without being drawn into a fight or a
heated argument. – Being calm & composed.
 Maintain your emotional stability.
 Give them a little time to run down.
 Maintain eye contact, this shows your firmness and confidence.
 Don’t interrupt or try to cut him or her down.
6
THE “EXPLODER”
 Exploder’s behavior is nothing but a temper tantrum to discourage
other party.
 Exploders can lose control and throw things, shout, say regrettable
things or even strike others.
 They may attack on the self-image or face by using humiliating &
abusive words or terms.
Example : Short Tempered People
7
HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE
EXPLODERS”
 We have to first calm them down & then switch to a problem-solving
mode of interaction & effective communication.
 Give them time and space to run down and gain self-control on their
own.
 Try to make them realize that you take them and their concerns
seriously by using your active listening skills.
 Moving to a private setting for further discussion, can be an effective
move in this kind of scenario.
8
THE “COMPLAINER”
 The Complainer has a tendency to find and pin-point faults with
everything.
 The Complainer wants to convey that someone should be doing
something about their problems.
 They bring up issues on the table, but do not take responsibility &
initiative to engage in a productive problem solving dialogue.
 This attitude drives them to make more complaints.
9
HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE
COMPLAINERS”
 Listen attentively and carefully to their complaints even if you feel
guilty or impatient.
 Don’t agree with or apologize for their complaints, even if the
situation demands to do so, do it very subtly.
 State the facts without comment and don’t get into accusations-
defense re-accusation pattern.
 If all else fails, ask the Complainer “How do you want this discussion
to end ?”
10
THE “CLAM”
 The Clam is the person or negotiator who does not answer any
question or do not engage in any conversation and they remains
silent, grunt and noncommittal.
 If one attempts to open them they hardly offer little in the
clarification position.
11
HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE CLAM”
 To cope up with them your major task is to try to open them up and
begin to discuss what it is that is on their mind or what is bothering
them to come forward and share.
 Develop your skills in using the Friendly-Silent-Stare technique.
 Ask open-ended questions & plan for extra time that will allow you
to wait with composure.
 Don’t ideally chat when silence is required because that shows your
discomfort with the situation.
12
THE “WET BLANKET”
 The Wet Blanket responds to any offer or proposal with a quick and
negative response.
 They used terms like “It won’t work” & “It’s of no use of at all”.
 Wet Blankets is unable to move and shift from the fault finding
position to the action mode of problem solving and this is what
differentiate them from others.
Example : Negative People
13
HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE WET
BLANKET”
 To cope with them one need to engage them in rational and logical
problem solving without becoming negativism & pessimism.
 Be alert to your own tendencies and approaches towards pessimism.
 Make optimistic but realistic statements about past success in
resolving similar issues.
 Take ownership and be prepared to take action on your own and
announce your plans.
14
THE “KNOW-IT-ALL”
These people shows that they know everything about every
transaction or situation.
 The Know-It-All is the bulldozing expert on all matters exist.
 They leave others in the feeling one-down, stupid, worthless.
 They react to others information, facts, knowledge with irritation or
anger.
Example : Over smart Individuals
15
HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE KNOW-IT-
ALL”
 One of the best tactics is to exhibit extreme humility, when someone
predicts that “I am the expert,” a smart reply would be “Yes I know
that”.
 Ask exploratory questions to examine any plans for solving the
problems and resolution of issues.
 Watch out for your own Know-It-All responses give minimum
information but as possible relevant- “You know” statements.
16
THE “STALLER”
 This is a type of negotiator who has difficulty in making decisions or
they are habitually indecisive.
 They never want to make a final decision about anything.
 They are easily agreeable and easy to work with until you need to
depend on them for some action.
 Their response is no response.
Example : Indecisive People
17
HOW TO COPE UP WITH “STALLER”
 The major task with Stallers is their Stalling is their preferred mode
of problem solving and you can change that.
 If you discuss something with them and they agreed on summarize it
and then move forward.
 If You are negotiating with a typical Staller and all of a sudden they
backtracks rush to his superior “The real decision makers” & tell them
what a great job their negotiator id doing.
18
DEALING WITH OPPOSITION
OPPOSITION :
- Opposition sharpens the mind as it is the origin for sense of
devising strategy.
- Increase Skills and add zest.
- It makes you gain insight into your own self and situation that in
turn fosters continuous and continual growth & developments.
- Dealing with opposition keeps you alert.
- Opposition comes in two forms-Idea opponent & Visceral
opponent.
19
DEALING WITH OPPOSITION [TYPES]
20
TYPES OF OPPONENTSIdea Opponent Visceral Opponent
Opposition is
based on logic &
reason
Emotional Enemy-
created because of
attack on self-image
or face
IDEA OPPONENT
 An idea opponent is one who disagrees on a particular issue or
alternative on the basis of rational and logical facts.
 This encourages the pooling of ideas, information, & feelings to find
a mutually beneficial outcome.
 Adversity is converted into the opportunity.
 Hence Idea opponent is always a potential ally.
Example : Cyrus Mystri
21
ERRORS IN DEALING WITH IDEA
OPPONENT
 An opponent begins negotiating with an idea opponent by
announcing their alternatives or answer.
 The harder line & express their conclusion as a demand or
ultimatum.
 This causes opponent to react in the same way.
 Hence subsequently both the sides land up in a competitive Win-
Lose negotiating mode.
22
VISCERAL OPPONENT
 Also called as Emotional Enemy.
 They do not only disagrees with your point of view but also as a
human being.
 Creative/Reasonable/Factual/Practical problem solving can’t take
place as the Visceral opponents are very difficult to convert.
 Hence all the logic, facts, ideas & evidence you put across will not
enough or will not work
Example : Padmaavat
23
VISCERAL OPPONENT
24
Face Sense Self-Image
• Who I want others to think I
am.
• It is a how a person wants
to be seen publicly.
• Image of a person in his/her
own mind.
• Who you think you are.
PRECAUTIONS
 Avoid any possible public embarrassment to the people with whom
we deal.
 For every action there is a reaction. ( Newton’s 3rd Law )
 Hence make your point & present your case without making a
Visceral opponent.
 Even if you are right, refrain from humiliating an exposing people to
ridicule, at least “In public”.
25
PRECAUTIONS [TWO RULES]
1. NEVER FORGET THE POWER OF YOUR ATTITUDE –
• No one & nothing can irritate you without your consent.
• Even if you have just cause to retaliate, restrain yourself.
• Be cool, composed & unruffled under all circumstances.
2. NEVER JUDGE THE ACTION & MOTIVES OF OTHERS –
As we cannot look into someone’s heart or mind, it would seem
absurd to believe that you might know what impels or propels them.
26
THANK
YOU
27
“Communications without Intelligence is noise,
Intelligence without Communications is irrelevant”

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Dealing with difficult people in negotiation

  • 1. NEGOTIATION & SELLING SKILLS TOPIC : - DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE & OPPOSITION - DEALING WITH OPPOSITION ~ DR. ASMAT ARA KHAN 1
  • 2. NEGOTIATION ? & SELLING ? WHAT IS NEGOTIATION ?  Negotiating is a process of exchanging offers and counter offers - “exchange of concessions” – for arriving at a compromise by which both parties reach to an agreed positions & outcomes. WHAT IS SELLING ?  Selling is a process of flow of goods or services or ideas from Seller to Buyer in exchange of money. 2
  • 3. DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE AND OPPOSITION DIFFICULT PEOPLE : - Difficult people do exist everywhere. - They come in every variety and no workplace is without them. - It depends on your self-esteem, your self-confidence & your professional skills & courage to find out that how difficult is the person to deal/handle. - Dealing with difficult people is much tougher when they are attacking on your self-image or your face. 3
  • 4. DIFFERENT TYPES OF DIFFICULT PEOPLE . 4 DIFFICULT PEOPLE EXPLODER SHERMAN TANK COMPLAINER CLAMWET BLANKET KNOW-IT-ALL STALLER
  • 5. THE “SHERMAN TANK”  Sherman Tank’s behavior is synonymous to Attack.  They behave in an abusive, unexpected, intimidating and contemptuous manner and try their best to leave their victims on the defensive mode, feeling overwhelmed and powerless. Sherman Tanks have a strong and driving desire to prove to themselves and to others that they are always right. Example : Britishers 5
  • 6. HOW TO COPE UP WITH “SHERMAN TANKS”  You must stand up to them without being drawn into a fight or a heated argument. – Being calm & composed.  Maintain your emotional stability.  Give them a little time to run down.  Maintain eye contact, this shows your firmness and confidence.  Don’t interrupt or try to cut him or her down. 6
  • 7. THE “EXPLODER”  Exploder’s behavior is nothing but a temper tantrum to discourage other party.  Exploders can lose control and throw things, shout, say regrettable things or even strike others.  They may attack on the self-image or face by using humiliating & abusive words or terms. Example : Short Tempered People 7
  • 8. HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE EXPLODERS”  We have to first calm them down & then switch to a problem-solving mode of interaction & effective communication.  Give them time and space to run down and gain self-control on their own.  Try to make them realize that you take them and their concerns seriously by using your active listening skills.  Moving to a private setting for further discussion, can be an effective move in this kind of scenario. 8
  • 9. THE “COMPLAINER”  The Complainer has a tendency to find and pin-point faults with everything.  The Complainer wants to convey that someone should be doing something about their problems.  They bring up issues on the table, but do not take responsibility & initiative to engage in a productive problem solving dialogue.  This attitude drives them to make more complaints. 9
  • 10. HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE COMPLAINERS”  Listen attentively and carefully to their complaints even if you feel guilty or impatient.  Don’t agree with or apologize for their complaints, even if the situation demands to do so, do it very subtly.  State the facts without comment and don’t get into accusations- defense re-accusation pattern.  If all else fails, ask the Complainer “How do you want this discussion to end ?” 10
  • 11. THE “CLAM”  The Clam is the person or negotiator who does not answer any question or do not engage in any conversation and they remains silent, grunt and noncommittal.  If one attempts to open them they hardly offer little in the clarification position. 11
  • 12. HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE CLAM”  To cope up with them your major task is to try to open them up and begin to discuss what it is that is on their mind or what is bothering them to come forward and share.  Develop your skills in using the Friendly-Silent-Stare technique.  Ask open-ended questions & plan for extra time that will allow you to wait with composure.  Don’t ideally chat when silence is required because that shows your discomfort with the situation. 12
  • 13. THE “WET BLANKET”  The Wet Blanket responds to any offer or proposal with a quick and negative response.  They used terms like “It won’t work” & “It’s of no use of at all”.  Wet Blankets is unable to move and shift from the fault finding position to the action mode of problem solving and this is what differentiate them from others. Example : Negative People 13
  • 14. HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE WET BLANKET”  To cope with them one need to engage them in rational and logical problem solving without becoming negativism & pessimism.  Be alert to your own tendencies and approaches towards pessimism.  Make optimistic but realistic statements about past success in resolving similar issues.  Take ownership and be prepared to take action on your own and announce your plans. 14
  • 15. THE “KNOW-IT-ALL” These people shows that they know everything about every transaction or situation.  The Know-It-All is the bulldozing expert on all matters exist.  They leave others in the feeling one-down, stupid, worthless.  They react to others information, facts, knowledge with irritation or anger. Example : Over smart Individuals 15
  • 16. HOW TO COPE UP WITH “THE KNOW-IT- ALL”  One of the best tactics is to exhibit extreme humility, when someone predicts that “I am the expert,” a smart reply would be “Yes I know that”.  Ask exploratory questions to examine any plans for solving the problems and resolution of issues.  Watch out for your own Know-It-All responses give minimum information but as possible relevant- “You know” statements. 16
  • 17. THE “STALLER”  This is a type of negotiator who has difficulty in making decisions or they are habitually indecisive.  They never want to make a final decision about anything.  They are easily agreeable and easy to work with until you need to depend on them for some action.  Their response is no response. Example : Indecisive People 17
  • 18. HOW TO COPE UP WITH “STALLER”  The major task with Stallers is their Stalling is their preferred mode of problem solving and you can change that.  If you discuss something with them and they agreed on summarize it and then move forward.  If You are negotiating with a typical Staller and all of a sudden they backtracks rush to his superior “The real decision makers” & tell them what a great job their negotiator id doing. 18
  • 19. DEALING WITH OPPOSITION OPPOSITION : - Opposition sharpens the mind as it is the origin for sense of devising strategy. - Increase Skills and add zest. - It makes you gain insight into your own self and situation that in turn fosters continuous and continual growth & developments. - Dealing with opposition keeps you alert. - Opposition comes in two forms-Idea opponent & Visceral opponent. 19
  • 20. DEALING WITH OPPOSITION [TYPES] 20 TYPES OF OPPONENTSIdea Opponent Visceral Opponent Opposition is based on logic & reason Emotional Enemy- created because of attack on self-image or face
  • 21. IDEA OPPONENT  An idea opponent is one who disagrees on a particular issue or alternative on the basis of rational and logical facts.  This encourages the pooling of ideas, information, & feelings to find a mutually beneficial outcome.  Adversity is converted into the opportunity.  Hence Idea opponent is always a potential ally. Example : Cyrus Mystri 21
  • 22. ERRORS IN DEALING WITH IDEA OPPONENT  An opponent begins negotiating with an idea opponent by announcing their alternatives or answer.  The harder line & express their conclusion as a demand or ultimatum.  This causes opponent to react in the same way.  Hence subsequently both the sides land up in a competitive Win- Lose negotiating mode. 22
  • 23. VISCERAL OPPONENT  Also called as Emotional Enemy.  They do not only disagrees with your point of view but also as a human being.  Creative/Reasonable/Factual/Practical problem solving can’t take place as the Visceral opponents are very difficult to convert.  Hence all the logic, facts, ideas & evidence you put across will not enough or will not work Example : Padmaavat 23
  • 24. VISCERAL OPPONENT 24 Face Sense Self-Image • Who I want others to think I am. • It is a how a person wants to be seen publicly. • Image of a person in his/her own mind. • Who you think you are.
  • 25. PRECAUTIONS  Avoid any possible public embarrassment to the people with whom we deal.  For every action there is a reaction. ( Newton’s 3rd Law )  Hence make your point & present your case without making a Visceral opponent.  Even if you are right, refrain from humiliating an exposing people to ridicule, at least “In public”. 25
  • 26. PRECAUTIONS [TWO RULES] 1. NEVER FORGET THE POWER OF YOUR ATTITUDE – • No one & nothing can irritate you without your consent. • Even if you have just cause to retaliate, restrain yourself. • Be cool, composed & unruffled under all circumstances. 2. NEVER JUDGE THE ACTION & MOTIVES OF OTHERS – As we cannot look into someone’s heart or mind, it would seem absurd to believe that you might know what impels or propels them. 26
  • 27. THANK YOU 27 “Communications without Intelligence is noise, Intelligence without Communications is irrelevant”