Difficult Conversations in Creative Environments ~ IA Summit 2009

Mastering Difficult Conversations

Dan Brown & Chris Detzi

EightShapes, LLC

IA Summit 2009, Memphis, TN

Introductions

About Us

Who we are

Why we’re here

About You

Your Name

Your Occupation

Why you’re here

Our Agenda

Introductions done!

Best Practices 15 minutes

A Model 15 minutes

The People 60 minutes

The Situations 60 minutes

Sample Scenarios 30 minutes

Summary of Techniques 30 minutes

Let’s Start with the Basics the Basics

Communication Best Practices

Be Positive

Engage Your Audience

Empathize

Lighten Up

Rephrase the negative statements

Negative = "We can't start until we get requirements"

Positive = "Please give us the requirements so we can start."

Rise above the Naysayers

“ We can’t do that.”

“ That’s way to complicated.”

Always Start with the Good

“ What I like about this so far is....”

Openness over Defensiveness

“ I think that’s a great idea. Perhaps we can talk about it how it might work?”

Communication Best Practices Be Positive

Personalize the Message

“ Great Question, Molly .”

“ Jason , what do you think about that?”

Repeat the Questions You’re Asked

“ So the question is .... Did I get that right?”

Position Your Questions for Success

Use Humor

Communication Best Practices Engage Your Audience

Know the situations, not just the people

Listen and Seek to Understand

Don’t be quick to dismiss (even if you disagree)

Respond with an acknowledgement of situation / emotion

Communication Best Practices Empathize

Humor can be a powerful communication tool

Reduces anxiety and hostile moods

Establishes a positive environment

Helps “gauge” the audience

Provides a way to make a point, without attacking

Does not have to mean insincerity or frivolity

Make it relevant

Be on the lookout for material

Prep & Plan (don’t assume it will just ‘come to you’)

When in doubt, point to yourself

Communication Best Practices Lighten Up

A Site Map of Communications

A model for interpersonal interactions

Difficult Conversations :: © Copyright EightShapes, LLC 2009

Common behaviors in creative environments

They’re the People that You Meet that You Meet

What makes people

hard to work with?

No Direction

They can’t tell you what’s wrong

Symptoms

Float with the wind

Broad, non-specific or emotional feedback

Fear conflict

Techniques

Be mindful of goals

Separate yourself from the issue

Ask good, specific questions

Misdirected Passion

They feel strongly about the strangest things

Symptoms

reaction not commensurate with issue

taking things personally

Techniques

See other perspectives/agendas

Pick your battles

Let others have their say

Set expectations and explain context

Inconsistent messaging

They talk out of both sides of their mouth

Symptoms

“That’s not what we discussed...”

“I don’t recall saying that specifically....”

“Well he told me...”

Techniques

Bite your tongue (well, nibble it)

Pick your battles

Validate and capture messages

Unwilling to admit ignorance

They get stuff wrong

Symptoms

outputs show misunderstanding

“Let me try that again!”

Techniques

Deflect responsibility

Avoid distractions

No Vision

They don’t know where they want to go

Symptoms

Willing to listen to any direction

Can’t separate good from bad

Techniques

Ask good questions

Find out what stifles their vision

No Structure

They are disorganized

Symptoms

unaware of project plan

missing deadlines

Techniques

Define action items

No Strength

They are easily taken off course

Symptoms

a new problem every week

Techniques

Avoid distractions

Remind of implications

Not Available

Eighty percent of success is showing up

Symptoms

missing meetings

not responding to email

Techniques

Set action items

Tunnel Vision

Other things get in the way of their view

Symptoms

refusal to compromise

Techniques

Ask good questions

Let others have their say

Tell a good story and align it with audience

Deflect responsibility

Prioritize reputation

Rather save face than admit they're wrong

Symptoms

(might come with other habits, like lack of focus)

Techniques

Letting others be right

Picking your battles

Setting action items: how do we fix this?

Poor communication skills

They can't articulate concerns

Symptoms

rambling messages

difficult to map/contextualize messages

Techniques

Ask good questions

Define action items

Find out what’s stifling

Poor use of communications tools

They love love love love love email

Symptoms

long emails

detailed project correspondence in IM

tangents in meetings

Techniques

See other people's perspectives

Find out what stifles them

Redirect to another tool

They’re the people that you meet

No direction

Misdirected passion

Inconsistent messaging

Unwilling to admit ignorance

No vision

No structure

No strength

Not available

Tunnel vision

Prioritize reputation

Poor communication skills

Poor use of communication tools

The situations we face and

techniques to master them

It’s Called Work Work

What situations do you face?

The Challenge

The size of the ‘stakeholder’ or interested party list is unwieldy and dramatically inhibiting progress.

The Techniques

Identify the Influencers and speak directly to them

Don’t ask questions of the group, ask of specific individuals

Provide channels for individual feedback, but publish for broader consumption

Managing Bumps in The Road (Circumstances) Too Many People Involved

The Challenge

The performance of one or several team members is jeopardizing project success

The Techniques

First identify all of the positive aspects of the performance

Avoid explicit and implicit personal attacks

Coach don’t point

Use Positive language

Express confidence about abilities

Managing Bumps in The Road (People) Poor Team Member Performance

The Challenge

The project is facing seemingly insurmountable complications, losing support, and overall confidence is waning

The Techniques

Get out of the Weeds

Reminders of Why we’re here, What we’re doing

Change the conversation; focus on Path Forward

There’s Light at the End of the Tunnel

Managing Bumps in The Road (Circumstances) Losing Momentum

The Challenge

Clarifying and rationalizing design choices when challenged

The Techniques

Establish “common practices” before design exercise

Pick your battles

If supporting data isn’t there, explain the hypothesis

Know Your why’s

Make sure stakeholders are on the ride for the whole way

Communicating Design Defending Decisions

The Challenge

Communicating Design to varied interests and perspectives

The Techniques

See Others Perspectives / Agendas

Identify the Influencers and speak directly to them

Get Your Story Straight; Prep with the ‘Whys’

Pick Your Battles; know your give points

Communicating Design Design Reviews

The Challenge

Creating a shared understanding of scope, timelines, and accountability for a complex, multi-faceted design project

The Techniques

Prepare Questions for Success...and ask every one of them!

Expose the Elephants

Clarify & Set Expectations

Confirm and Validate those Expectations

Planning Design Resources, Scope, & Timelines

The Challenge

Divergent ‘stakeholder’ (client) interests are inhibiting progress

The internal team is not in agreement on the design direction

The Techniques

Work from a foundation of agreements

Listen; understand the scope of the disagreements

Focus on the positive aspects of each of the ‘approaches’

Remove personal interests from the equation

Take it offline, if necessary (ideate with each person separately or collectively)

Managing Bumps in The Road (People) Resolving Conflicts

The Challenge

Divergent ‘stakeholder’ (client) interests are inhibiting progress

The Techniques

Work from a foundation of agreements

Encourage discussion to arrive at the root disagreement

Ideate with each stakeholder (collectively or separately)

Focus on the business; take personal interests out of the equation

Forward Focused

Managing Bumps in The Road (People) Resolving Conflicts (among Stakeholders)

The Challenge

The proverbial finger is pointing at you relative to lack of progress or missteps

The Techniques

Avoid the Situation through Proactive statusing and risk cataloging

Don’t point -or deflect- the finger

Facts and Objectivity are key

Change the conversation; focus on path forward

Managing Bumps in The Road (Circumstances) Defending Status & Progress

The Challenge

Despite all of your best efforts, the project has failed

The Techniques

Communicate the reusable parts, not everything that was done was for naught

Remind people of the good work that is still relevant

Remain confident and upbeat

Outline the Lessons and keep them at the ready

Managing Bumps in The Road (Circumstances) Project Failure

Planning Design Resources, Scope, & Timelines Communicating Design Design Reviews Defending Decisions Managing the Bumps in the Road People Resolving Conflicts (internal & stakeholder) Poor Team Member Performance Too many people Circumstances Defending progress Losing Momentum Project Failure The Situations That We Face

Sample Scenarios

Situation: Poor Team Member Performance

You have a client meeting on Wednesday to present a draft deliverable. You’ve arranged a meeting with the IA responsible on Monday to discuss progress and conduct a review.

The IA arrives at the review meeting without the document, claiming she/he didn’t have a chance to work on it.

Characteristics: Doesn’t admit ignorance, Poor communication skills

Role-Playing » The Missing Deliverable The Missing Deliverable

Situation: Defending Design Decisions

Your client sets up a meeting between you and another stakeholder. You’ve heard of this person, but haven’t ever met with him/her before.

Your client wants you to walk this person through the work done to-date. Your client says that this person is paying for part of the project, and wants to get a sense of what’s going on.

During the meeting, the new stakeholder pokes all kinds of holes in the design.

Characteristics: Tunnel vision, No structure

Role-Playing » The Late Stakeholder The Late Stakeholder

Situation: The Design Review

You're reviewing a design but the feedback you're getting is broad, and non-specific. When it is specific, it's centered around inconsequential details that don't help you move the design forward in a meaningful way.

You can sense from the body language and tone of the comments that there's some confusion or uncertainty about the design but they can't seem to articulate it well and they may not be comfortable with providing direct, potentially damaging feedback.