Active listening is a structured form of listening that focuses attention on the speaker. It requires reflecting back what was said to confirm understanding between both parties. There are several methods to active listening including preparing mentally to focus without distraction, paying attention through eye contact and body language, showing engagement through nods and verbal acknowledgments, providing feedback by paraphrasing and asking clarifying questions, deferring judgment to avoid interrupting, and responding appropriately by treating the speaker with respect. Benefits of active listening include showing respect, allowing for disclosure and correction, staying focused on the discussion, resolving conflicts, permitting speakers to share feelings, and providing additional retained information.
The document provides guidance for developing strong facilitation skills to effectively guide group meetings and discussions. It outlines key principles like drawing out diverse opinions, focusing on objectives, and remaining impartial. Good facilitators understand the group's goals, keep the meeting on track and agenda, and ensure all members participate and decisions are made democratically. Planning the logistics and establishing clear ground rules are also important for facilitating productive meetings. The document advises addressing any disruptions respectfully and only as a last resort removing disruptive members if they prevent the group from accomplishing its goals.
This document discusses various aspects of business communication including context, objectives, approach, techniques, dimensions of communication, leadership responsibilities, listening feedback, emotional intelligence, self-awareness, self-regulation, self-motivation, social awareness and empathy, social skills, nonverbal communication for listeners, active listening techniques, feedback, and empathic listening. It provides guidance on developing effective communication skills through understanding emotional intelligence competencies.
This document outlines 7 key skills for successful negotiation: preparation, patience, active listening, emotional control, verbal communication, problem solving, and reliability. It discusses each skill in 1-2 paragraphs, emphasizing the importance of preparation (responsible for 90% of success), listening to understand other perspectives, maintaining emotional control, clearly communicating your position, focusing on problem-solving rather than goals, keeping promises to build trust, and being reliable. Mastering these 7 negotiation skills can help you achieve win-win agreements.
Effective communication involves using language appropriate to the audience's understanding level, ensuring the intended message is received, and developing open and honest relationships. Interpersonal communication skills include listening, questioning, providing feedback, and handling conflict. Such skills help develop self-awareness, acknowledge others' interests, and manage diversity to get the best from team members. Barriers like lack of skills, interest or feedback can interrupt the communication process between a sender and receiver.
This document discusses various aspects of effective negotiation strategies and tactics. It outlines different negotiation styles like integrating, obliging, dominating, and compromising. It also lists assumptions that should be made before negotiating, such as both parties having needs to be met, avoiding a win-lose philosophy, issues being potentially negotiable, and considering the other person's needs. The document defines principled negotiation as deciding issues based on merits rather than positions, and focuses on separating people from problems, interests over positions, inventing mutual gain options, and using objective criteria. It concludes with questions for discussion about negotiation styles and examples of focusing on interests leading to agreement.
Active listening is a structured form of listening that focuses attention on the speaker. It requires reflecting back what was said to confirm understanding between both parties. There are several methods to active listening including preparing mentally to focus without distraction, paying attention through eye contact and body language, showing engagement through nods and verbal acknowledgments, providing feedback by paraphrasing and asking clarifying questions, deferring judgment to avoid interrupting, and responding appropriately by treating the speaker with respect. Benefits of active listening include showing respect, allowing for disclosure and correction, staying focused on the discussion, resolving conflicts, permitting speakers to share feelings, and providing additional retained information.
The document provides guidance for developing strong facilitation skills to effectively guide group meetings and discussions. It outlines key principles like drawing out diverse opinions, focusing on objectives, and remaining impartial. Good facilitators understand the group's goals, keep the meeting on track and agenda, and ensure all members participate and decisions are made democratically. Planning the logistics and establishing clear ground rules are also important for facilitating productive meetings. The document advises addressing any disruptions respectfully and only as a last resort removing disruptive members if they prevent the group from accomplishing its goals.
This document discusses various aspects of business communication including context, objectives, approach, techniques, dimensions of communication, leadership responsibilities, listening feedback, emotional intelligence, self-awareness, self-regulation, self-motivation, social awareness and empathy, social skills, nonverbal communication for listeners, active listening techniques, feedback, and empathic listening. It provides guidance on developing effective communication skills through understanding emotional intelligence competencies.
This document outlines 7 key skills for successful negotiation: preparation, patience, active listening, emotional control, verbal communication, problem solving, and reliability. It discusses each skill in 1-2 paragraphs, emphasizing the importance of preparation (responsible for 90% of success), listening to understand other perspectives, maintaining emotional control, clearly communicating your position, focusing on problem-solving rather than goals, keeping promises to build trust, and being reliable. Mastering these 7 negotiation skills can help you achieve win-win agreements.
Effective communication involves using language appropriate to the audience's understanding level, ensuring the intended message is received, and developing open and honest relationships. Interpersonal communication skills include listening, questioning, providing feedback, and handling conflict. Such skills help develop self-awareness, acknowledge others' interests, and manage diversity to get the best from team members. Barriers like lack of skills, interest or feedback can interrupt the communication process between a sender and receiver.
This document discusses various aspects of effective negotiation strategies and tactics. It outlines different negotiation styles like integrating, obliging, dominating, and compromising. It also lists assumptions that should be made before negotiating, such as both parties having needs to be met, avoiding a win-lose philosophy, issues being potentially negotiable, and considering the other person's needs. The document defines principled negotiation as deciding issues based on merits rather than positions, and focuses on separating people from problems, interests over positions, inventing mutual gain options, and using objective criteria. It concludes with questions for discussion about negotiation styles and examples of focusing on interests leading to agreement.
This document discusses effective communication skills. It emphasizes establishing rapport by having self-confidence, understanding people, being enthusiastic, making eye contact, and showing interest in others. Communication is described as a process involving hearing, seeing, smelling, taste, and touch to convey thoughts or feelings from one person to another. Both verbal and non-verbal communication are important, as are avoiding barriers like lack of confidence, enthusiasm, feedback, and understanding other people's perspectives. Active listening is key to effective communication.
Body language refers to the non-verbal signals conveyed through facial expressions, gestures, and postures that communicate thoughts and feelings. Some examples of common body language include:
1) Happy or confident people tend to have their heels or toes raised when standing.
2) Self-doubters stand with their feet close together while more confident individuals take up more space.
3) Leaning forward shows interest in a conversation but leaning back can indicate disrespect or confidence.
4) Puffed out chests, shoulder shrugs, hands behind the back, and finger-steepled poses each carry their own meanings related to confidence, authority, or uncertainty.
This document discusses non-verbal communication and body language. It states that non-verbal communication makes up at least 65% of social meanings conveyed in a conversation. Non-verbal communication includes facial expressions, eye contact, body posture, gestures, use of personal space, tone of voice, touch, smell, clothing and style. Specific non-verbal cues like crossed arms, eye contact, smiling and handshakes can signal meanings like defensiveness, honesty and confidence. The document emphasizes the importance of being aware of non-verbal cues in communication and avoiding misunderstandings.
This document provides an overview of a negotiation skills workshop presented in 10 modules. Module 1 introduces negotiation concepts and workshop objectives. Module 2 covers different types of negotiations and phases. Module 3 discusses preparation, including establishing BATNA and WATNA. Module 4 covers setting the negotiation framework. Modules 5-7 outline the three phases of negotiation: exchanging information, bargaining, and closing. Module 8 focuses on reaching consensus and agreement. Module 9 addresses difficult negotiation tactics. Module 10 discusses informal negotiations outside the boardroom. Case studies are provided throughout to illustrate negotiation concepts.
Empathic listening involves listening with the intent to understand how the speaker feels in addition to their ideas. It is an effective technique for emotional situations or conflicts as it allows the speaker to share feelings without judgment. To listen empathetically, reflect back the emotions and meaning perceived without questioning, judging or advising the speaker. The goal is to understand the other person's perspective.
Emotional intelligence involves understanding and managing one's own emotions and the emotions of others. It is important for leadership and success in both personal and professional relationships. Developing emotional skills like self-awareness, empathy, and impulse control can help reduce stress and prevent emotional volatility. Meditation, social connections, and expressing one's feelings in a healthy way are some strategies for developing emotional intelligence.
Presented to a group of approx 20 leaders in the field of mentoring at the Friends for Youth Mentoring Conference, Thursday April 18, 2013 in Santa Clara, CA
The importance of communication, assertiveness and the different types of communication skills are well explained. Can be used for students and training programs.
The document discusses various aspects of communication including the definition of communication, the communication process, different styles of communication such as passive, aggressive and assertive, the importance of listening, and different types of communication such as verbal, non-verbal and written. It provides details on each of these topics, including the elements and benefits of different communication styles and types. The overall aim is to enhance the reader's understanding of effective communication.
This session will utilize coaching skills to create a culture of learning and career development. Do your leaders see employee engagement as a survey, program, or completing a course? Do you want your leaders and employees to convert feedback and conversations into meaningful action and growth? Unconscious bias, resistance to feedback and organizational politics can make it challenging to measure the needs of your teams and organizations. With the coaching skill everyone can be equipped to help drive learning and growth.
How to conduct effective interviews May 2011Timothy Holden
Half day interactive open workshop in Toronto for individuals recently appointed or promoted into roles where they will be interviewing for the first time.
This document provides an overview of the chapters covered in a book about becoming a contributor. It discusses the identity and mindset of a contributor, including having a vision of success focused on effectiveness, values, and inner fulfillment rather than just external rewards. Becoming a contributor involves taking responsibility for problems and stepping out of one's comfort zone. The document also outlines skills for contributors such as designing solutions, engaging deeply with subjects, demonstrating trustworthiness, and presenting oneself in interviews and discussions in terms of one's potential contributions.
Communication and conflict resolution skillsQatar Charity
This document discusses communication, conflict resolution, and negotiation skills for leaders. It covers topics like inspirational speaking, listening, nonverbal communication, dealing with cross-cultural barriers, conflict management styles, and negotiation techniques. The document provides guidance on developing strong communication abilities, handling disputes effectively, and gaining agreement through principled discussion. Overall, the document aims to equip leaders with interpersonal strategies for motivating others and resolving issues constructively.
This document discusses effective communication skills. It defines communication and lists some common ways people communicate such as verbally, through body language and in writing. It also discusses the communication process and barriers to effective communication such as assumptions and distractions. Finally, it provides tips for improving listening skills, verbal communication and body language like making eye contact, speaking slowly and avoiding distractions. The overall document aims to help people understand communication and how to enhance their abilities.
This document provides guidance on having difficult conversations and delivering bad news. It recommends expressing empathy for the other person's feelings and perspective. It advises practicing your core message but not too much, and delivering bad news in person. It also suggests having a plan but not being talked out of your decision, focusing on communicating your core message clearly, and then planning an exit from the conversation once understanding is reached. The document concludes with a reminder that difficult conversations should always be handled with respect, follow-up, and consideration of the other person's perspective.
This document discusses effective communication skills. It emphasizes establishing rapport by having self-confidence, understanding people, being enthusiastic, making eye contact, and showing interest in others. Communication is described as a process involving hearing, seeing, smelling, taste, and touch to convey thoughts or feelings from one person to another. Both verbal and non-verbal communication are important, as are avoiding barriers like lack of confidence, enthusiasm, feedback, and understanding other people's perspectives. Active listening is key to effective communication.
Body language refers to the non-verbal signals conveyed through facial expressions, gestures, and postures that communicate thoughts and feelings. Some examples of common body language include:
1) Happy or confident people tend to have their heels or toes raised when standing.
2) Self-doubters stand with their feet close together while more confident individuals take up more space.
3) Leaning forward shows interest in a conversation but leaning back can indicate disrespect or confidence.
4) Puffed out chests, shoulder shrugs, hands behind the back, and finger-steepled poses each carry their own meanings related to confidence, authority, or uncertainty.
This document discusses non-verbal communication and body language. It states that non-verbal communication makes up at least 65% of social meanings conveyed in a conversation. Non-verbal communication includes facial expressions, eye contact, body posture, gestures, use of personal space, tone of voice, touch, smell, clothing and style. Specific non-verbal cues like crossed arms, eye contact, smiling and handshakes can signal meanings like defensiveness, honesty and confidence. The document emphasizes the importance of being aware of non-verbal cues in communication and avoiding misunderstandings.
This document provides an overview of a negotiation skills workshop presented in 10 modules. Module 1 introduces negotiation concepts and workshop objectives. Module 2 covers different types of negotiations and phases. Module 3 discusses preparation, including establishing BATNA and WATNA. Module 4 covers setting the negotiation framework. Modules 5-7 outline the three phases of negotiation: exchanging information, bargaining, and closing. Module 8 focuses on reaching consensus and agreement. Module 9 addresses difficult negotiation tactics. Module 10 discusses informal negotiations outside the boardroom. Case studies are provided throughout to illustrate negotiation concepts.
Empathic listening involves listening with the intent to understand how the speaker feels in addition to their ideas. It is an effective technique for emotional situations or conflicts as it allows the speaker to share feelings without judgment. To listen empathetically, reflect back the emotions and meaning perceived without questioning, judging or advising the speaker. The goal is to understand the other person's perspective.
Emotional intelligence involves understanding and managing one's own emotions and the emotions of others. It is important for leadership and success in both personal and professional relationships. Developing emotional skills like self-awareness, empathy, and impulse control can help reduce stress and prevent emotional volatility. Meditation, social connections, and expressing one's feelings in a healthy way are some strategies for developing emotional intelligence.
Presented to a group of approx 20 leaders in the field of mentoring at the Friends for Youth Mentoring Conference, Thursday April 18, 2013 in Santa Clara, CA
The importance of communication, assertiveness and the different types of communication skills are well explained. Can be used for students and training programs.
The document discusses various aspects of communication including the definition of communication, the communication process, different styles of communication such as passive, aggressive and assertive, the importance of listening, and different types of communication such as verbal, non-verbal and written. It provides details on each of these topics, including the elements and benefits of different communication styles and types. The overall aim is to enhance the reader's understanding of effective communication.
This session will utilize coaching skills to create a culture of learning and career development. Do your leaders see employee engagement as a survey, program, or completing a course? Do you want your leaders and employees to convert feedback and conversations into meaningful action and growth? Unconscious bias, resistance to feedback and organizational politics can make it challenging to measure the needs of your teams and organizations. With the coaching skill everyone can be equipped to help drive learning and growth.
How to conduct effective interviews May 2011Timothy Holden
Half day interactive open workshop in Toronto for individuals recently appointed or promoted into roles where they will be interviewing for the first time.
This document provides an overview of the chapters covered in a book about becoming a contributor. It discusses the identity and mindset of a contributor, including having a vision of success focused on effectiveness, values, and inner fulfillment rather than just external rewards. Becoming a contributor involves taking responsibility for problems and stepping out of one's comfort zone. The document also outlines skills for contributors such as designing solutions, engaging deeply with subjects, demonstrating trustworthiness, and presenting oneself in interviews and discussions in terms of one's potential contributions.
Communication and conflict resolution skillsQatar Charity
This document discusses communication, conflict resolution, and negotiation skills for leaders. It covers topics like inspirational speaking, listening, nonverbal communication, dealing with cross-cultural barriers, conflict management styles, and negotiation techniques. The document provides guidance on developing strong communication abilities, handling disputes effectively, and gaining agreement through principled discussion. Overall, the document aims to equip leaders with interpersonal strategies for motivating others and resolving issues constructively.
This document discusses effective communication skills. It defines communication and lists some common ways people communicate such as verbally, through body language and in writing. It also discusses the communication process and barriers to effective communication such as assumptions and distractions. Finally, it provides tips for improving listening skills, verbal communication and body language like making eye contact, speaking slowly and avoiding distractions. The overall document aims to help people understand communication and how to enhance their abilities.
This document provides guidance on having difficult conversations and delivering bad news. It recommends expressing empathy for the other person's feelings and perspective. It advises practicing your core message but not too much, and delivering bad news in person. It also suggests having a plan but not being talked out of your decision, focusing on communicating your core message clearly, and then planning an exit from the conversation once understanding is reached. The document concludes with a reminder that difficult conversations should always be handled with respect, follow-up, and consideration of the other person's perspective.
The document discusses respect and its three components: respecting yourself, respecting others, and respecting the environment. It defines respect as thoughtfulness or consideration for feelings, wishes, rights, traditions, and belongings of oneself and others. Respecting yourself involves honoring your own emotions, skills, beliefs, and body. Respecting others means caring for others, embracing differences, communicating kindly, listening, and using good manners. Respecting the environment entails helping create a greener world and protecting nature and property.
Slides fra kursus i mundtlig formidling. Gennemgår basale retoriske begreber som kontekst, forarbejdningsfaser og praktisk argumentation. Herunder introdution til persuasio-begrebet og McCroskeys Ethos. Enjoy!
Konflikthåndtering i professionelle relationer - udvalgte slidesWattar Gruppen
Vi siger tak for sidst til deltagerne på gå-hjem-mødet om ’Konflikthåndtering i professionelle relationer’. Du kan se udvalgte slides fra oplægget her. Vi glæder os til at se jer til de kommende gå-hjem-møder med nye temaer. De vil snart blive offentliggjort - så hold øje her på LinkedIn.
Konflikthåndtering i professionelle relationer - udvalgte slides
Konflikthåndtering
1. SAMMEN GØR VI DIG BEDRE
1
Karen Melchior Jensen
Act2learn
Konflikthåndtering
2. Projekters konfliktpotentiale
En konflikt kan betragtes som en proces hvor 2 eller flere
individer/grupper bevidst eller ubevidst hindrer hinanden i at
nå deres mål.
3. Konflikter i projektledelse
Konflikter i projektledelse er uundgåelige,
men det gælder om at håndtere konflikter
proaktivt, konstruktivt, professionelt og til
gavn for projektet
Konflikter kan være destruktive, men
konflikter kan også være konstruktive
4. Typiske konflikter i projektledelse
Konflikter mellem drift og
fornyelsesopgaver
Konflikt mellem afdelinger og linjer/
stabe
Konflikt mellem traditionelle ledere og
projektledere
Konflikt indbyrdes mellem projektledere
Konflikter i projektgruppen (faglige og
personlige)
Konflikt mellem projektlederen og
projektdeltagerne
Konflikt mellem projektgruppe,
styregruppe, referencegruppe og
eksterne ressourcepersoner og andre
interessenter
5. Konflikthåndtering
Hvad kan konflikter bruges til?
5
Afdække behov for at diskutere gensidige relationer
Få dig til at forstå hvad du værdsætter ved andre
Udvikle sociale færdigheder, og gøre kommunikation lettere
Skabe energi til at behandle et problem
Øge involvering og deltagelse
Skabe en omhyggelig beslutningsproces
Giver luft og mulighed
Giver selvtillid
6. Konflikthåndtering
5 grundlæggende principper
6
Konstruktive holdninger til konflikter:
1. Respekt for den enkeltes opfattelse af omverden
2. Man behøver ikke kende årsagen for at finde løsningen
3. Alting hænger sammen med alting
4. Mennesket rummer selv løsningen
5. Store problemer kræver ikke ”store” løsninger
7. Projektets spændinger
• Personlige konflikter hhv. interessekonflikter hhv.
faglige konflikter mellem professionelle
• Politisk studehandel går ikke an
• Kortlæg synspunkter, holdninger, værdier, interesser
• Skab forståelse for at der er forskellige udgangspunkter
• Skab forståelse for at der er fælles mål og resultat
samtidig med individuelle interesser
• Behov for at udøve personlig ledelse
• Behov for personlighed og autoritet
8. Typer af konflikter
1. Interessekonflikter
2. Forståelses-/metode-
konflikter
3. Magtkonflikter
4. Værdi og holdningskonflikter
9. Hvilke konflikter har du oplevet
i projekter?
Konfliktens
Synlige udtryk
Konfliktens
Underliggende årsager
-Personlig kemi
-Værdier
-Magt
-(Mis)forståelse
-Interesse-
modsætninger
Konfliktens Effekt
Gode/dårlige
Erfaringer med
Håndtering af
Konflikten
(forståelse +
handling)
11. Valg af værktøj
Trin 1-3 på konflikttrappen:
a) Klarlægning: er der en egentlig konflikt eller blot en
uenighed (grund til niveau 1+ eller eskalering sket
som fejl eller misforståelse)
b) Afspænding af konflikten:
sprogbrug
c) Forsøg på løsning af
modsætning via
forhandling
12. Konflikters sprog
Sprog som optrapper Sprog som afspænder
Du – sprog
Afbryder
Ligeglad
Ledende
spørgsmål
Bebrejder
Abstrakt
Fokuserer på
fortiden
Går efter
personen
Holder sig på
afsenderens
banehalvdel,
respekterer
den anden som
person, giver
plads til andre
opfattelser og
værdier, tager
ansvar
Jeg – sprog
Lytter til ende
Interesseret
Åbne spørgsmål
Udtrykker sit
ønske
Konkret
Fokuserer på
nutid / fremtid
Går efter
problemet
Bebrejder,
kritiserer,
angriber,
vurderer,
generaliserer,
fortolker den
andens motiver,
giver skyld.
13. Valg af værktøj
Over Trin 3 på konflikttrappen:
a) Mægling indtil parterne anerkender
behovet for, at der findes en løsning
gennem dialog og er villige til at indgå i
denne dialog.
Ved niveau 5+ kan det være, at det ikke er
muligt at løse konflikten gennem mægling.
I projekter vil løsningen dermed være at
eliminere behovet for parternes samarbejde
og/eller projektets afhængighed af dette.
14. Mæglingsprocessen - 1
1. Fri fortælling: Egen version
1. Behovsformulering
1. Baggrund for krav
2. Tillid og godt forhold
3. Bekymringer og interesser frem
4. Afdække dagsorden
15. 3. Brainstorm – parallel tankegang
• Identificere løsningsstrategier
• Parterne identificerer områder for enighed
• Parterne arbejder kreativt
4. Forhandling
Aftale opbygge løsningsmodeller
vælges
Test af realiteter for indhold
5. Handlingsplan
Mæglingsprocessen - 2
16. Checkliste til hvordan du kan tage konflikter op og
mægle
1. Indkald de involverede parter til et møde, så snart du bliver opmærksom på konflikten
2. Oplys om årsagen til mødet på forhånd, så parterne kan forberede sig
3. Vær positiv og upartisk i ord, ansigtsudtryk og kropssprog
4. Skab en uformel atmosfære
5. Begynd med "Jeg har bemærket et problem i jeres forhold. Formålet med dette møde
er at få rede på problemerne og nå en konklusion, der tilfredsstiller jer begge"
6. Afstik mødets grundregler:
parterne taler ikke direkte til hinanden, men til dig
hver person fortæller dig om sin forståelse af problemets kerne
personer taler på skift uden afbrydelser af den anden part
7. På mødet skal du sørge for at afklare følgende:
hvad er parternes definition af problemet
hvordan tror de, at problemet er opstået?
hvad er det ønskede resultat set fra parternes synspunkt?
hvad vil de acceptere som minimum?
hvordan kan de indgå et gensidigt tilfredsstillende kompromis?
Kilde: www.lederweb.dk
17. Konflikthåndtering (1)
• Dominere
• Undvige
Fremgangsmåde
• Skære igennem
• Beslutte/handle på egen hånd
• Bruge magt, true
• Politisere
• Bruge særlig viden
• Sælge/overtale
• Undgå kontakt
• Tale udenom
• Fordreje problemet
• Forhale
Metoder til håndtering af konflikterMetoder til håndtering af konflikter
18. Konflikthåndtering (2)
Metoder til håndtering af konflikterMetoder til håndtering af konflikter
Fremgangsmåde
• Fælles drøftelse til enighed
• Analyse
• Fornuftigt/rationelt
• Løsningsvalg
• Mægling
• Kompromis
• Studehandel
• Fokusere på enighedspunkter
• Betone positive elementer
Konfrontere,
samarbejde
Forhandle
Udglatte
19. 1. Hvordan kan jeg blive bedre til at
håndtere de konflikter, som jeg
selv er part i?
2. Hvordan kan jeg blive bedre til at
hjælpe andre med at håndtere
konflikter?
3. Hvordan kan vi som organisation
blive bedre til at håndtere
konflikter? Hvad kræver det?
Tid til eftertanke…
20. Refleksion over dagen
Hvilket emne/pointe/spørgsmål fra
dagen er især interessant for
mig?
Hvorfor er det interessant?
Hvordan kan jeg bruge det
fremadrettet?
Editor's Notes
Interessekonflikten: Uundgåeligt vil der opstå situationer, hvor der kolleger eller grupper imellem er ønsker og holdninger, der står i modsætning til hinanden. Herunder kommer også konflikter mellem ledere og medarbejdere om arbejdsforholdene, der måske optrappes til en regulær arbejdskonflikt.. Værdikonflikten: Vi har forskellige syn på hvad der er rigtigt og forkert, f.eks. vedrørende politik eller arbejdsmoral, og her ligger kimen til værdikonflikterne. En type konflikter som er mest almindelig mellem forskellige aldersgrupper, faggrupper eller kulturelle grupper. Da værdiopfattelser påvirkes gennem uddannelse, meningsudvekslinger og fælles erfaringer er det muligt for lederen at arbejde konstruktivt med værdikonflikter, således at gensidig forståelse samt viljen til forandring øges blandt de stridende parter.
Trin 1-3: konflikten drejer sig om sagen. Der er et sagforhold, som er genstand for forskellige opfattelser, fortolkninger eller anden uenighed. På de næste tre trin føler konfliktens parter begge, at de trods al god vilje nu ikke længere kan lukke øjnene for den kendsgerning, at modparten er en idiot/er inkompetent/ondskabsfuld osv. Konflikten drejer sig nu om personen (eller gruppen). Måske taler man officielt stadig meget om sagen – men den fungerer nu i realiteten mere som et påskud for at beskæftige sig med modpartens dårlige egenskaber På de tre sidste trin bliver konflikten til "ren proces" i form af krig (i bogstavelig eller overført betydning). Parterne beskæftiger sig måske nok stadig med at sværte modpartens personlighed eller hensigter – men dette fungerer nu mest som påskud for at hitte på stadig nye metoder, tricks, destruktive kræfter osv.
På dette trin er parterne reelt ikke længere interesseret i at komme til at forstå hinanden. Det, de hver for sig er optaget af, er, hvordan de kan finde huller og svagheder i modpartens argumentation – og evt. selv finde det afgørende argument, der kan sætte den anden skakmat. (I det mindste i ens egne øjne – der er nemlig også en tendens til, at modparten ikke vil indrømme, at han/hun er mat). Der er derfor ingen udvikling i diskussionen, og da den slutter, står begge parter i realiteten, hvor de hele tiden har stået – de har i bedste fald opdaget visse svagheder i deres egen argumentation, som de fremover vil forsøge at få dækket.
Hvor er mægling nødvendig? På de første trin, hvor konflikten endnu drejer sig om sagen, vil parterne ofte kunne løse den selv. Det kan dog være nyttigt med en udenforstående katalysator til at hjælpe parterne med at danne et fælles billede af situationen og de behov, der ligger bag den. På de næste tre trin, hvor konflikten bliver personlig, vil parterne sjældent være i stand til at finde en løsning uden hjælp fra en udenforstående (eller overordnet). På de sidste tre trin, hvor konflikterne har antaget karakter af åben krig, vil parterne møde mægleren med skepsis, mistænke ham/hende for ikke at være upartisk, søge at drage ham/hende ind i konflikten og ofte også skyde på den pågældende ved den mindste anledning.
Undlad at søge efter ”fælles holdninger” – det er en utopi. Tal altid ud fra dig selv, i stedet for ”vi er mange, der mener..”
En mægler er en neutral aktør, der gennem struktureret samtaleproces hjælper de stridende parter med selv at finde en løsning. Mægleren kommer ikke med løsninger og træffer ingen afgørelser, men fungerer som procesleder. Mæglingsprocessen forløber typisk over 1-2 møder af 2 timers varighed. Fortrolighed før, under og efter mødet. Stiller krav til parterne om at være aktive og tage ansvar for sin del af konflikten