Christian mental illness communication tools - Mental Health Grace Alliance is a faith-based, non-profit organization created to promote understanding in the church and provide assistance and support to individuals living with mental illness and their families.

1. COMMUNICATION
TOOLS
WHAT
NOT
TO
DO…
1) CORRECT
OR
DISCOUNT:
Do
not
focus
on
trying
to
correct
or
discount
their
thoughts
and
feelings.
2) REASONING:
Do
not
try
to
reason
or
logically
convince
them
that
their
reality
is
off.
Nor
should
you
try
to
prove
your
point,
nor
convince
them
you
are
right.
Never
try
to
use
scripture
to
prove
your
point
or
fix
them.
3) RAISE
YOUR
VOICE:
Do
not
raise
your
voice
in
an
attempt
to
control
the
situation.
4) BE
SILENT:
Do
not
use
the
silent
treatment
out
of
frustration
(note:
depending
on
the
situation
they
may
need
some
time
and
distance
–
that’s
not
rejection).
5) FEARFUL:
Do
not
become
fearful
from
what
they
are
saying
and
feeling…it
can
lead
to
reaction.
WHAT
TO
DO…
1) AIM
FOR
THE
HEART:
Appeal
to
how
they
feel
even
if
it
is
irrational,
hurtful,
or
seems
insignificant.
2) COMFORT:
Look
past
the
issue
to
identify
and
agree
with
the
specific
feeling
behind
the
situation.
3) SIMPLE
SOLUTION:
Find
the
positive
in
the
situation
and
encourage.
Give
them
confidence
that
leans
towards
a
positive
solutions,
not
ultimatums
for
that
quick
fix
at
your
own
peace.
4) SPECIAL
HELP:
Find
and
use
other
ways
that
further
help
bring
calm
(i.e.
going
for
a
drive
in
the
country).
5) PROCESS:
You
can
help
dissect
the
situation
and
suggest
possible
solutions
–
all
the
while
encouraging
their
confidence
to
achieve
proposed
solutions.
6) SCRIPTURE
OR
GOD
REFERENCE:
If
you
choose
to
bring
up
GOD
or
scriptures,
it
should
be
simple
and
the
dialogue
short.
Use
references
about
God’s
character
and
identity
in
Christ,
not
references
that
imply
what
they
must
do
(for
example
do
not
use
verses
like
“Be
anxious
for
nothing,
but
in
everything
by
prayer…”
Phil
4.6).
WHAT
TO
DO
WITH
INTENSE
BEHAVIOR…
1) KEEP
COOL:
Remember
it’s
not
personal
–
it’s
the
disorder.
Even
if
they
use
hostile
and
accusative
language
or
bring
up
negative
past
experiences
about
you;
it’s
not
about
you.
2) STAY
FOCUSED
&
FIRM:
With
a
calm
manner,
but
firm
and
genuine
(after
using
the
guide
above)
reaffirm
your
love
and
presence
in
their
life,
then
reaffirm
or
address
the
boundaries
(behavior)
in
order
to
get
to
solutions.
“I
understand
how
upset
you
feel
and
I
apologize
for
any
offense
(be
specific)
I
have
caused
AND
I
will
be
a
part
of
helping
you
as
best
I
can…so
how
about
we
start
over
without
yelling.”
3) STAY
SPECIFIC
TO
CALM
THE
STORM
–
NOT
FIX:
Do
not
use
generalization
(“you
always
get
like
this
in
big
crowds”);
be
specific
to
one
issue
at
a
time
with
a
positive
outlook
that
focuses
on
a
solution(s)
(even
if
you
don’t
know
the
solution,
“I
know
it
will
work
out”).
FAITH
EVERY
PRAYER
COUNTS…even
those
5-­second
prayers
in
the
midst
of
the
storm…
“God
give
me
wisdom
to
help
this
(specific
situation
and
loved
one).
Pour
out
Your
grace
and
touch
their
mind
and
heart
to
respond
to
(specific
issue).”
Mental Health Grace Alliance
www.mentalhealthgracealliance.org