1. The document introduces the concepts of refraining and attending, which involve putting aside one's own opinions and focusing full attention on the speaker. 2. Learners practice refraining and attending in pairs by taking turns discussing their experiences on the course so far. They then provide feedback on how easy or difficult it was. 3. The session concludes by emphasizing the importance of self-awareness when listening, and having learners practice their skills in triads before reflecting on their learning.

1. Refraining and Attending
Session 5

2. Progress Report
Bringing it all
together
Skills The Helping rapport Attending and Reflecting The Change Questioning
Introduction Assessment Role building Refraining
Paraphrasing
Feelings Model Skills
&
Final
Assessment
Reflective Journal

3. Session Aims
Introduce learners to the principles and practice
of refraining and attending and explore the
importance of self awareness when using
listening skills.

4. Learning Outcomes
By the end of this session you will be able to:
1. Describe what is meant by refraining and
attending
2. Demonstrate the ability to refrain and attend
3. Reflect on your learning in small groups
4. Identify reasons for developing self-
awareness.

5. Last Session

6. Contents of this Session
 Ice-breaker: Draw to Win
 Refraining and Attending: Definitions and
Practise
 Bringing it Together
 Triads with Feedback Sheets
 Importance of Self-awareness when Listening

8. Refraining and Attending

9. Refraining
Putting on hold the urge to interrupt with your opinions
and advice. Resisting the desire to “fix” problems or
ask questions.
Attending
Focusing all of your attention on the speaker: what they
say, how they say it and what they do not say.
The aim is to remain within your client’s
frame of reference

10. Refraining and Attending
Exercise 20
Minutes
Find a partner you haven’t worked with much
Take turns - you have 10 minutes each to talk
about:
“What I have enjoyed and what I have found
challenging about my first few weeks on this
course”
Notice what it feels like to refrain and attend to the

11. Feedback
What was rapport like?
How easy or how difficult was refraining
and attending?
In what ways (if any) did you sabotage the
exercise?

12. Unfamiliar and Different?

13. Bringing it Together
 Environment
 Rapport
 Contract
 Refraining
 Attending

14. Feedback Sheets

15. Triads
Observer
Speaker Listener

16. Comfort Break

17. Bringing it Together Exercise
 Using the skills you have learnt over the last few
weeks.
 Get into Triads
 Share out the time
 Identify a small problem or dilemma in your life that
you can comfortably talk about
 Take turns as the speaker, listener and observer
 The observers role is to manage time and provide
written feedback to the listener

19. Self-
Awareness

20. Ernest Hemingway (1899 –
1961)
“When people
talk, listen completely.
Most people never
listen”.

21. Conclusions
You are now able to:
1. Describe what is meant by refraining and
attending
2. Demonstrate the ability to refrain and attend
3. Reflect on your learning in small groups
4. Identify reasons for developing self-
awareness.

22. Next Week
Please bring your reflective
journals to class for peer
feedback

23. Thank You Everybody!