This document discusses managing aggression and anger. It begins by exploring whether anger is good or bad, distinguishing between anger as an emotion and aggression as a behavior. It then discusses types of aggression, where aggression is learned from, and consequences of aggression for victims and aggressors. The document provides steps to manage anger and aggression, including identifying triggers, channeling anger through various outlets, building empathy, and becoming assertive. Communication styles are contrasted and assertive communication is encouraged. The bystander effect is also addressed.

1. Aggression Management
Name of Peer Moderator: _____________________

2. Is Anger Good or Bad
Bad Good
Can motivate and
energize us to do better
Can give us a direction to
work towards
Can give strength to work
against injustice
Can lead to aggression
and destruction
Can lead to impulsive
decisions we regret later
Can create hostility
between people

3. Anger Vs. Aggression
Anger
Is an emotion
Can be good or bad
Need not be directed at
others
Is normal and natural
Aggression
Is a behaviour
Is always harmful
Directed at others
Can be controlled
Everybody gets angry. That is okay. You’re going
to feel how you feel. BUT: how you act is up to
you. And that matters, because how you act leads
to consequences.

4. Types of Aggression
Verbal Physical

5. Aggression Also Means…
Defying authority
Bullying
Yelling
Breaking Things
Interrupting
Sarcasm
Gossiping
Spreading rumours
Excluding
Sitting alone

6. Share YOUR Story of Aggression

7. Who Are You?
The bully
The bullied
The
bystander

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CONSEQUENCES OF
AGGRESSION

9. Consequences for the Victim
Emotional - sadness, fear, guilt, low self-esteem
Physical – injury, frequent illnesses
Social – isolation, inability to make friends
Academic – inability to concentrate, dropout
Behavioural – smoking, drinking, eating too much/too
little, school refusal
Being a victim of bullying can affect every part
of our lives

10. Consequences for the Aggressor
It’s not only
the victim who
suffers

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IS AGGRESSION LEARNT?

12. Where We Learn From
Family
Friends
Community
Media

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MANAGING ANGER AND
AGGRESSION

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STEP 1: IDENTIFY YOUR
TRIGGERS

15. Identify Your Triggers
Failure
Disappointment
Not getting things your way
Feeling insulted
Perceiving unfairness
Frustration
Stress

16. Watch your thoughts
• You did that on purpose…
• You wanted to hurt me…
• You deserve this…
• You never even asked me…
• You’re being unreasonable…
• You think you’re so good…
• I’ll show you…
• You started it…
• That’s not fair…

17. Catch it at the Right time
• Stomach gets tight/upset
• Heart is beating faster
• Clenching fists
• Feel myself getting flushed
• Pressure on my temples
• Sweaty palms
• Clenched jaw

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STEP 2: CHANNELIZE YOUR
ANGER

19. Express Yourself
 Write a diary
 Talk to a friend
 Paint
Channelize Your Energy
 Go for a jog
 Dance
 Play a sport
 Regularize Breathing
Problem Solve
 Try to look at situation
objectively
 Look at alternatives
 Evaluate various options.
 Be sporty to “try” a new one
Be Regular with
 Sleep
 Appetite
 Recreation

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STEP 3: BUILD EMPATHY

21. Stop the Blame Game
Stop Blame
Don’t blame yourself
or others
Blaming does not give
solutions
Consider situational
factors
Talk to the “Culprit”
Put yourself in other’s
shoes
Give your point of view
Listen to the other’s
view
Reason
Try to ‘forgive’

22. Write a Letter to Someone You Have Bullied

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STEP 4: BECOME ASSERTIVE

24. Styles of Communication
Aggressive: Being a…. Bulldozer!! Passive: Being a… Door Mat!!
Passive Aggressive - Being
a… Sniper!!
Assertive:
Being a… Sign
Board!!

26. How To Be Assertive?
Do
 Be aware of your emotions and
triggers
 Look for mutually acceptable
alternatives.
 Be specific and clear
 Express your reasons and
feelings
 Listen to the other
 Use “I” statements
 Give feedback about behaviour
 Accept and Apologize when
you make a mistake
 Include positive messages
 Talk one on one
Don’t
 Make excuses
 Apologize for asking
 Always give in
 Put yourself down
 Blame yourself or others
 Criticise the person
 Interrupt
 Be sarcastic
 Shout
 Use physical force
 Use threats

27. Saying NO
Use assertive body language
Decide on your position before speaking
Don’t apologise when it’s not necessary
Don’t make excuses when not necessary
Don’t ask permission to say no
Don’t wait for acceptance – accept the consequences
The Broken Record Technique

28. Saying NO

29. The Bystander Effect

30. If you see someone being bullied
 Get help from an adult
 Be a friend to the person being bullied
 Help the person get away from the situation
 Don’t give bullying an audience
 Set a positive example

31. If you walk away and
get help, you’re part of
the solution.
If you stay and watch,
you’re part of the
problem.

32. Thank You!! 