This document provides information about anger management. It discusses understanding anger, triggers of anger, myths about anger, physiological changes that occur, identifying anger cues, and what anger looks like. It also outlines aspects of anger, steps to anger management, and skills to develop including identifying feelings, aggressive acts, consequences, thoughts, internal cues, coping mechanisms, communication, active listening, and stress reduction. The overall message is that anger is a normal human emotion but needs to be managed appropriately through understanding triggers and developing skills to express it constructively.

1. ANGER
MANAGEMENT

2. http://youtu.be/H30zO44tyvM

4. Why are we here?
• Understand the roots of anger
• Receive support, ideas and feedback from each
other
• Learn skills to deal with/manage anger
– Therefore improving interpersonal relationships

5. Understanding Anger
• What anger is:
– a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure,
or hostility
– A completely normal, usually healthy, human
emotion
– Potentially a dangerous emotion, which can tell
us a lot about ourselves.

6. There are lots of words to describe anger.
• What are some of the words you use to express the
range of your angry feelings?

7. “Anyone can become angry. That is easy. But
to be angry with the right person, to the right
degree, at the right time, for the right purpose
and in the right way – that is not easy.”
Aristotle (384-322 BC)

8. ABC’s of Anger
• A : Antecedent or Anger Trigger
– What stimulated the anger response
• B : Behavior
– Reaction provoked by anger
• C : Consequence
– What happened as a result of controlling or not
controlling one’s anger.

9. Triggers of Anger
External
• Specific person (co-workers or supervisor)
• Event (traffic jam, canceled concert or flight, talking
trash about your family, etc)
Internal
• Worrying about personal problems
• Memories of traumatic events

10. Myths About Anger
1. Anger is Inherited
2. Anger automatically leads to aggression
3. People must be aggressive to get what they want
4. Supressing anger is always desirable

12. Physiological and Biological Changes
• “Fight or flight” reaction (a natural, adaptive response to threat):
• Increase in blood pressure and heart rate
• Increase in energy hormones

13. Identifying Anger Cues
• How anger feels:
• Muscles tension
• Accelerated heartbeat
• “Knot” in the stomach or throat
• Changes in breathing
• Trembling or shaking
• Goose bumps
• Flushed face
• Changes in facial expression (eye brows,
frowning, nostrils, etc)

14. What anger Looks like
– Yelling
– Sulking
– Pouting
– Hitting
– Other Violence
– Competitive Games
– Accusations
– Arguing

15. Anger is natural
• Anger occurs naturally
and cannot be avoided.
• Find control techniques
rather than anger
elimination.

16. Anger Becomes a Problem When:
• Felt too intensely
• Felt too frequently
• Expressed inappropriately
– Words, gestures, contact.
• Results in negative consequences
– Assault, arrest, losing loved ones, termination from
work/treatment.
• Results in negative self concept
– Guilt, shame, regret.

17. Differences between Anger & Aggression
• Anger = Feeling
• Aggression = Action
• Anger is an emotion. It is ok to be angry.
• Aggression is acting out inappropriately and is
not ok. Learn to check your aggression and
express your anger appropriately.

18. What is anger Management
•A systematic method of cognitively
recognizing anger and managing its effects
•Anger management does not involve getting
rid of all anger, but using anger to enhance
your life.
•We can look at the purposes of anger in both
positive and negative light.

19. Aspects of Anger
•The positive aspects of anger are that you have
increased energy, are able to communicate your
feelings, able to problem solve and can take
charge of the situation.
•The negative aspects of anger are that you can
have disruption of your thinking, unnecessarily
defend yourself, become aggressive and become
known as an angry person.

20. Steps to Anger Management
• Identify personal signals of anger
– Anger thermometer

21. Techniques to Avoid
• Raising your voice
• Yelling
• Saying “I’m the boss”
• Insisting on have the
last word
• Using tense body
language
• Making comparisons
• Using degrading,
insulting, humiliating put
downs
• Using Sarcasm
• Bringing up unrelated
events
• Holding a grudge
• Nagging

22. ANGER MANAGEMENT
HOW DO I DO IT?

24. Develop skills
1. Identify a range of feelings including anger
2. Identify aggressive acts by self and others
3. Identify the potential consequences to self and others from
these aggressive acts
4. Identify self-destructive behavior
5. Identify thoughts prior to aggressive acts
6. Identify internal cues to feelings of anger
7. Develop coping mechanisms for dealing with anger
8. Communication
9. Active Listening
10. Stress reduction

25. Skill: Identify feelings
1. Identify a range of
feelings including
anger:
• Embarrassment
• Excitement
• Disappointment
• Jealousy
• Fear
• Helpless
• Sadness
• Left-out

26. Be in charge of your feelings
• I own my feelings.
• It is okay to feel angry.
• Anger is part of being human.
• I learn how to express my anger
in helpful ways.

27. The skill to identify acts of aggression
• What are some
examples of
aggression
• Throw something
• Kick someone or something
• Get in someone’s face
• Shoving, grabbing, hitting
• Break something
• Call someone names
• Give someone a dirty look
• Silent treatment
• Get others to “gang up”
• Spread rumors

28. I choose to feel good about
myself through expressing my
feelings
1. I express angry feelings in ways
that are fair to others and me.
2. I use fair words…e.g “I feel …
when you….”
3. I control how I let my anger out.
4. I practice cooling off.
5. I watch my thoughts.

29. Skill: to identify consequences
• What are some
potential
consequences?
• Physical harm to someone
or self
• Destruction of property
• Loss of family/friends
• Loss of job
• Loss of social privileges
• Going to jail
• Getting a bad reputation

30. Skill: identifying self destructive
behavior
• What are some of
the destructive
behaviors involved?
• Negative self-talk
• Blaming everyone else
• Taking everything
personally
• Assuming
• Overeating, drinking
• Driving recklessly
• Taking drugs
• Looking for fights
• Feeling outraged

31. Skill: Identify Thoughts prior to
aggressive Act
• What are some
thought a person
might have prior to an
aggressive act:
• You did that on purpose…
• You wanted to hurt me…
• You deserve this…
• You never even asked me…
• You’re being unreasonable…
• You think you’re so good…
• I’ll show you…
• You started it…
• There’s no justice…

32. Skill: Identify internal cues of feeling
anger
• What are some
physical responses
to feeling anger:
• Stomach gets tight/upset
• Heart is beating faster
• Clenching fists
• Feel myself getting flushed
• Pressure on my temples
• Sweaty palms
• Clenched jaw

33. Skill: Coping mechanisms
1. I find ways to let it go
2. I talk about hurt and angry
feelings.
3. I look for someone to discuss my
anger.
4. I discuss my words and actions
that hurt others.

34. Skill Coping mechanisms cont…
• Know what pushes your
buttons.
• Know your body’s anger signs.
• Stop and think!
• Cage your rage…it’s your
choice.
• Decide what to do.

35. Skill: Communication
• Communication Defined- The act of expressing
oneself in such a way that one is readily &
clearly understood.
–Play the telephone game:

36. Skill: Active Listening
• Role Plays
– Practice:
• Using “I” statements: I feel ______ when you
_______ because __________. I want
________________.
– Example: I feel frustrated when you yell because I
think you don’t care about my feelings. I want to
find a better way to resolve things between us.
• Checking in to rephrase/paraphrase
• Avoid Communication blockers such as: name-
calling, criticizing, interrupting, sarcasm, blaming,
yelling.

37. Skill: Stress Reduction
• Relaxation techniques
– Diaphragmatic breathing
– Progressive relaxation
– Count to ten
– Non competitive exercise
– Distraction
– Humor
– Empathy for the other person

38. Ideas to Make You Disturbed
• I must be loved by practically every significant
person in my life-and if I’m not, it’s awful!
• I must not make errors or do poorly, and if I do, it’s
terrible.
• People and events should always be the way I want
them to be.

39. Ideas to Help You Function Effectively
• It’s definitely nice to have people’s love and approval –
but even without it, I can still accept and enjoy myself.
• Doing things well is satisfying – but it’s human to
make mistakes.
• People are going to act the way THEY want – not the
way I want.

40. Ways to Keep Cool:
1. Get exercise every day.
2. Eat right.
3. Get enough sleep.
4. Learn to relax.
5. Know your feelings.
6. Write about those feelings.
7. Find a quiet place.
8. Take a time out.
9. Find fun distractions.
10. Make good decisions about
what you see and hear.
11. Choose friends who make you
feel good.
12. Learn to forgive and forget.

41. Some Other Tips
• Don’t take yourself to seriously. Not every disappointment is a
tragedy.
• Change your environment.
• Timing is important.
• Avoid anger triggers.
• Find alternatives to anger-provoking events

42. ANGER MANAGEMENT- SUMMARY
• Calm down
• Show mutual respect
• Name the problem
• Find solutions
• Choose the best solution
• Congratulate yourself
• Review the solution that was
picked