VIC SIG Event: To Coach or not to Coach, that is the question? Coaching as a strategy in Dispute Resolution

1. CONFLICT MANAGEMENT
COACHING
PRACTICAL NEW APPROACH FOR LEADERS AND EMPLOYEES

2. CONFLICT CAN DIMINISH DECISION-MAKING ABILITY AND CAPABILITY
or the individuals perception of their options and skills
COACHING EXPANDS OUR VISTA AND AVAILABLE OPTIONS
It is extremely valuable at our most vulnerable time.

3. Unattended conflict can become destructive, affecting productivity, relationships,
health, safety, reputation.
DESTRUCTIVE CONFLICT
Unattended conflict can become destructive, affecting productivity, relationships,
health, safety, reputation.
Differences Disagreements Disputes Bullying Violence

4.  Reduced problem-solving ability
 Frustration
 Anger, Aggression
 Withdrawal / Avoidance behaviour
 Confusion
 Vulnerability
 Distress
 Apprehension / Anxiety
WHAT HAPPENS IN CONFLICT

5. BENEFITS
➡️ Educative
➡️ Awareness
➡️ Leadership Management Development
➡️ Assist Decision-making
➡️ Flexibility
➡️ Engaging
➡️ Behavior Change

6. ASSIST IN DECISION-MAKING
➡️ Triage / Conflict Analysis (What is this conflict about & what do we do? INFORMAL approach)
➡️ Choose more intentionally when emotional level high (EI focus)
➡️ Work through personal options regarding their own conflict situation
➡️ Career /employment options
➡️ Lifestyle changes
➡️ Intake for Mediation – How can this process help me?

7. FLEXIBLE
CONFLICT is a normal part of life. We all experience it – our own or others. It’s everywhere. Many
opportunities to work with employees to Board Members. CINERGY Process very flexible.
➡️ Senior Leaders/Directors – Don’t get along and conflict is impacting the business/Board members
➡️ Managers – Difficult employee behavior/team dynamics or a new job/organization culture
➡️ Employees – Transitioning to new roles, not getting along with others, part of the disciplinary process.
➡️ Pre Meetings or Mediations

8. ENGAGING
➡️ Client engagement with coaching process usually strong (“I want/have to get better at this”)
➡️ Stakes are high to change the situation (employment, business/financial risk, turnover)
➡️ Privacy, confidentiality (can vent, explore options, rehearse in private)
➡️ An area of vulnerability and want to increase their capability (especially leaders)

9. BEHAVIOUR CHANGE
WHERE SUSTAINABLE BEHAVIOUR CHANGE IS DESIRED:
➡️ Ability to conduct a number of coaching sessions to create awareness and support personal change
➡️ Managers, HR, mentors and others can support the client’s change
➡️ Anecdotal feedback from client is mostly that conflict has reduced ore resolved/person still in a job

10. EDUCATIVE
➡️ Coaching can fit well in a supervisor/manager/leadership program
➡️ Go deeper into an area of development - more specialized and often immediate need
➡️ Client can research new behavior/lifestyle options (exercise/yoga/calming activities/diet, etc.)
➡️ Learning how to locate and use new supports in the organization (EAP, time-off, training, mentors)

11. IT STARTS WITH AWARENESS
➡️ Profiling Instruments: create awareness when used with coaching
➡️ Use relevant, valid instruments pertaining to conflict dynamics (e.g. FACET5 and TeamScape, CDP)
➡️ Client Feedback reports provide ‘big picture’ and show both strengths and development needs
➡️ Profiling can de-personalize the conflict and reduce resistance
➡️ Instruments should provide helpful and construction ideas and behaviors.

12. AWARENESS OF INEFFECTIVE BEHAVIOUR
• Help clients increase their self awareness and identify triggers and patterns /ineffective behavior
• As a Manager, awareness of triggers/hot buttons to increase EI and leadership capability or how to deal
with a difficult employee, colleague or boss
• As an Employee, awareness of hot buttons, ineffective behavior
• and ‘the other perspective’.
• For all: Consciously manage thoughts, feeling and actions.
THIS COACHING CAN BE CAREER CHANGING. GREAT INSIGHTS INTO OWN AND OTHERS BEHAVIOUR

13. DEVELOPMENT PLAN
The coaching can be positioned within a leadership development framework. As a core leadership
competency, conflict management skills are essential for:
➡️ Managing/resolving employee and team issues
➡️ Having difficult conversations that are conflict-prone
➡️ Building And Maintaining High Performing Teams
➡️ Negotiating With Stakeholders / Multi Party meetings
➡️ Project Management and Change Management

14. HIGH CONFLICT SITUATIONS
Some of the characteristics of employees with high conflict behaviors include:
➡️ Uncompromising
➡️ Difficulty Accepting and Healing Loss
➡️ Emotions Dominate their Thinking
➡️ Works against own self-interest
➡️ Inability to Reflect on Own Behavior

15. WHEN NOT TO COACH
Some situations encountered. Coaching Agreement can provide protection/exiting.
➡️ SELF-REFLECTION: Client is unable or unwilling to reflect on behavior
➡️ INCAPACITY: Disclosed mental or physical health factors influencing behavior
(can work in tandem sometimes with health professionals)
➡️ RESISTANCE: Resistance too high (not voluntary, final warning, overwhelmed)
➡️ ORGANISATION’S ETHICS: Questionable reasons for coaching intervention
➡️ UNWELL/FATIGUED: Coaching can be high energy/compassion/expectations to fix
➡️ SAFETY: Vigilance – unsafe situations or unlawful behavior (threats)

16. USEFUL READING
AND REFERENCES
CINERGY Conflict Management Coaching Programs
Cinnie Noble: Conflict Mastery, Questions to Guide You. Cinergy Coaching 2014
High Conflict Behaviors. High Conflict Institute. Articles by Bill Eddie, Founder of Institute.
Managing High Conflict People in Organisations. YouTube. Bill Eddie
Conflict Dynamics Profile (CDP) Instrument