The document discusses reasons why mentoring relationships fail and how to ensure success. Research identified 5 characteristics of failed relationships: poor communication, lack of commitment, personality differences, perceived or real competition, and the mentor's lack of experience. Correspondingly, 5 characteristics ensured success: reciprocity, mutual respect, clear expectations, personal connection, and shared values. The document recommends 5 steps for a successful mentoring relationship: build rapport, discuss expectations, create an agreement, understand it is a two-way relationship, and schedule reviews.

1. 5 Reasons
Mentoring
Relationships Fail
- and how to
make sure yours
doesn’t!
Ann Rolfe

2. Mentoring is critical to
Career success and
satisfaction

3. It offers significant benefits to both mentors and mentorees

4. But
mentoring
is not
always
effective

5. Straus, S., Johnson, M., Marquesz, C., and Feldman, M. (2013) Characteristics of Successful
and Failed Mentoring Relationships Acad Med January 2013; 88(1): 82-89
Recent research in an academic setting identified
5 characteristics
of failed mentoring relationships

6. Straus, S., Johnson, M., Marquesz, C., and Feldman, M. (2013) Characteristics of Successful
and Failed Mentoring Relationships Acad Med January 2013; 88(1): 82-89
The good news is they also revealed
5 characteristics of successful mentoring!

7. Features of Failure
(so you can avoid them)

8. #1 Poor communication

9. #2 lack of commitment

10. #3 Personality differences

11. #4 Perceived (or real) competition

12. #5 Mentor’s lack of experience

13. Secrets of Success
(so you can apply them)

14. #1 Reciprocity
Development for both mentor and mentoree

15. #2 Mutual respect

16. #3 Clear expectations

17. #4 Personal connection

18. #5 Shared values
Value
Value

19. Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
Summary
Straus, S., Johnson, M., Marquesz, C., and Feldman, M. (2013) Characteristics of Successful
and Failed Mentoring Relationships Acad Med January 2013; 88(1): 82-89

20. No one wants to fail

21. So set yourself up for
success!
from the start
with these 5 steps …

22. #1 Build Rapport

23. Look
for what you have in
common

24. Personal & professional background
Interests, hobbies, sport

25. Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
Building Rapport develops

26. #2 Discuss Expectations

27. Share and clarify
what
you each want …

28. Your purpose and goals

29. Scope and boundary of the relationship

30. Roles and Responsibilities

31. Logistics - practical aspects

32. Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
Discussing Expectations helps deal with:

33. #3 Create an Agreement

34. Negotiate
ways you will respect
each other’s time, needs
and differences …

35. Etiquette - do’s and don’ts
Ethics - code of conduct
Ground rules/ guidelines

36. Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
An agreement deals with:

37. #4 Understand mentoring is a
two-way street

38. Mentoring benefits both
parties

39. !
Both mentors and mentors
will develop and grow
!

40. !
!
Mentors are not expected to
have all the answers

41. Mentors listen and ask
as much (or more)
than they
show and tell

42. Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
Seeing mentoring as two-way deals with

43. #5 Schedule a Review

44. What you’ve achieved
!
What’s working well
!
What you’d prefer to do
differently
!
After a few meetings
have a conversation
about:

45. Confirm your commitment to continue mentoring
A review allows you to:

46. !
Seek additional !
support, guidance !
or resources
Or

47. !
Or, Agree to exit the relationship
without fault or failure

48. Available
in ebook or hardcopy
www.mentoring-works.com

49. I’m Ann Rolfe!
I’ve specialised in mentoring
since 1994.
!
I provide consulting,
mentoring workshops,
keynotes, books
and online learning
based on adult learning,
and career development
!
Visit !
www.mentoring-works.com
!
Contact!
ann@mentoring-works.com
+61 2 4342 2610