OES Inclusion in the Early Years Faculty

Oregon Episcopal School
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Seattle Girls’ School
Inclusion in the Early Years:
Why, What, and How
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)

About Seattle Girls’ School

Agenda
 Cultural Competency
 Increasing Inclusivity
 Working With Young Children
 Questions and Answers

Dimensions of Identity and Culture
This model of identifiers and culture was created by Karen Bradberry and Johnnie Foreman for NAIS Summer Diversity Institute,
adapted from Loden and Rosener’s Workforce America! (1991) and from Diverse Teams at Work, Gardenswartz & Rowe (SHRM 2003).

The Jones Model of Cultural Competence
Cultural Self-
Awareness
Cultural
Intelligence
Cross-Cultural
Effectiveness
Skills
Countering
Oppression
through
Inclusion

Developmentally Appropriate
Diversity Work

Timeline for Early Awareness of
Difference and Oppression
Age Signs
6 months Can discern racial feature differences
3 years Awareness of own and others’ gender.
Beginning awareness of gender roles
5 years Desire to categorize – self, others
Curiosity about meaning of differences
Aware of biases
7 years Can regulate biases versus behaviors
Starting to parrot adult messages
3rd grade Are aware of societal stereotypes
5th grade Have internalized stereotypical messages

When They’re Little
Theme: Trying to Understand the World
 Curiosity based questions about difference
 Find out what they’re actually asking
 Find out why they’re asking
 Answer their questions straightforwardly
 Model and coach humility, delight, and
curiosity about difference
 Be mindful of children’s media – it’s not
always good for kids

Curricular Approaches
 Exposure Base
 Allowing Questions
 Gentle Guidance
 Modeling Comfort With Discussions
 Expanding Definition of What’s Possible
 Fairness, Kindness, and Rightness

Examples
 The Black Santa Story
 The Jackie Robinson Story
 What Makes a Family?
 Alternate Fairy Tales
 Dress-Up Corner
 Guest Speakers That Defy Stereotypes

Parents: Partners or Foes?

What Parents Fear and
What We Can Do About It
 “I didn’t know about this stuff…”
 “I don’t have any language around this…”
 “I want to protect their innocence…”
 “Are you teaching my kids values?”
 “I don’t want my kid to feel spotlighted…”
 Heads Up Communication
 Resources and Language
 Clear Reiteration of Mission and Values
 Research and Your Expertise
 Explicit Communication of Parents’ Roles

Responding to Hurtful Moments

What We’re Thinking and Feeling
I can’t believe this
is happening.
That’s SO not
right. Should I
say something?
Am I butting in?
Would it help?
I am so upset!

What We End Up Saying

What Others Hear When We Say Nothing
See? They
agree with me!
I am so right
about this.
No one sees or
understands. I
am alone.

Say Something to Somebody
 Now or Later (or Say It Now About a Later)
 Target, Agent, Fellow Bystanders, Authority Figures
“In the End, we will remember not the words of
our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Be A DEAR….

Interruption by Being A DEAR
 Affirm the person or relationship
 Describe the behavior without judgment
 Explain the emotion/impact and your filters
 Assume positive intent
 Request or suggest different behavior

They were born
innocent…

NCBI Effective
Interventions Model
 Reduce Defensiveness
– Tone
– Body Language
– Respect
 Keep the Conversation Going
– Hear Them Out
– Ask Open-Ended Questions
– Set Aside Your Feeling for the Moment
– Dialogue
 Build the Relationship
 Stop the Behavior
 Win an Ally

Intervening in the Ouch Moment: Examples
 Ask open ended questions
– “He’s acting like a sissy”
– “How’s he acting? And why is that sissy?”
 Find out the experience motivating the comment
– “Why can’t they just speak English around here?”
– “It must be hard not to understand what people are saying around you.”
– “I’m sick of my tuition paying for scholarship students.”
– “Tell me more about that.”
 Use exaggerated humor to highlight what’s going on
(use sparingly)
– “That movie is so gay.”
– “That movie is attracted to other movies? I didn’t know that was possible!”
 Join the person and do not make yourself superior
– “She got that award because she’s black and female.”
– “You know, I hear that a lot. I’ve been trying to figure out why we seem to think when a
black woman gets recognized it must be because of ‘diversity’ stuff rather than that she
earned it.”

Listening to the Real Message

What Was Said During the Intervention
Those words or
actions are
hurtful to me.
Please stop.

What We Hear During the Intervention
You are a
bad, bad
person, and I
hate you!

What We Should Hear
During the Intervention
You are basically a good
and decent person. As
with all of us, you’ve
made a mistake, and you
may not know how that
mistake is impacting
others. I am going to
give you the gift of
information so that your
intentions and impacts
match up.

It’s a gift…

When You’re Told About
the Hurtful Moment You Created
 Listen with full attention
 Don’t try to defend or respond right away
– Take deep breaths
– Acknowledge your feelings
 Your mistakes don’t define you
– Be worthy of their trust and gift
 Prioritize the Impact over Intent
– Apologize for real
*** Moving through these moments with grace is
called shame resilience. It’s a vital skill***

When You’re Told About
the Ouch Moment You Created:
Examples
 “I really appreciate your telling me this.”
 “I’m so embarrassed that I did that.”
 “I’m so sorry my words and actions made you feel
that way. No matter what I intended, it hurt you.”
 “I’m pretty overwhelmed right now, and I don’t
want to respond in a way I’d regret. Do you think
you can help me come up with a better way to
handle that situation after I get into a calmer
place?”
 “I wanted to go back to a moment I don’t think I
handled very well… Can we talk?”

Practice Makes
Less Heart-Attack-Inducing

Case Studies
 A girl comes to class wearing jeans,
sneakers, and a sports jersey. She has very
short hair. Other kids start saying things like,
“Are you a boy?” “You look like a boy” etc.
 One student says to another, “You talk
funny.”
 A student of color says, “Why do the
teachers always confuse me with ***
(another student of the same race)?”

Stretching the Inclusive Boundaries

Presenter Information
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
6th Faculty and
Professional Outreach
Seattle Girls’ School
2706 S Jackson Street
Seattle WA 98144
(206) 805-6562
rlee@seattlegirlsschool.org
http://tiny.cc/rosettalee

Identity Resources
• Carlos H. Arce, “A Reconsideration of Chicano Culture
and Identity”
• Atkinson, Morten, & Sue, “Racial/Cultural Identity
Development Model (R/CID)”
• Mindy Bingham and Sandy Stryker, “Socioemotional
Development for Girls”
• Vivienne Cass, “Homosexual identity formation: Testing
a theoretical model”
• William Cross, Shades of Black: Diversity in African
American Identity”
• Anthony D’Augelli, “ Identity development and sexual
orientation: Toward a model of lesbian, gay, and
bisexual development”

Identity Resources
• Erik Erikson, “Eight Stages of Man”
• J. E. Helms, Various Publications on Racial and Ethnic
Identity Development
• Jean Kim, “Processes of Asian American Identity
Development”
• James Maricia, “Four Ego and Identity Statuses”
• Suzanne Kobasa Ouellette, “The Three C’s of
Hardiness”
• Jean S. Phinney, “Ethnic Identity in Adolescents and
Adults: Review of the Research”
• Ponterotto & Pederso, Preventing Prejudice
• Maria P. P. Root, Various Works on Multiracial Identity

Identity Resources
• Patricia Romney, Karlene Ferron, and Jennifer Hill,
“Measuring the Success of Diversity Directors in
Independent Schools”
• Pedro Ruiz, “Latino/a Identity Development Model”
• Chalmer E. Thompson and Robert T. Carter, Racial
Identity Theory
• Alex Wilson, “How We Find Ourselves: Identity
Development and Two Spirit People”
• Christine J. Yeh, “The Collectivistic Nature of Identity
Development Among Asian-American College
Students”

Resources
 Joshua M. Aronson, Ph.D., “Improving Achievement &
Narrowing the Gap,” Learning and the Brain
Conference, Cambridge, MA, November 2003
 Allan G. Johnson, Privilege, Power, and Difference.
 Miss Representation, documentary film on media and
women
 United Nations Population Fund Statistics on Gender
Equality as of 2005
http://www.unfpa.org/swp/2005/presskit/factsheets/facts
_gender.htm
 Learning to be critically literate of mass media
http://www.medialit.org/
 Media Guide for Parents and Educators
http://www.commonsensemedia.org/

Gender Specific Resources
 Jennifer Bryan, various trainings and publications on gender
and sexuality diversity, From the Dress Up Corner to the
Senior Prom
 JoAnn Deak, Ph.D., Girls Will Be Girls: Raising Confident and
Courageous Daughters, How Girls Thrive
 Jackson Katz, Tough Guise, Wrestling with Manhood, The
Macho Paradox
 John Medina, Talaris Research Institute, various studies on
early gender differences in competition and play
 Mary Pipher, Ph.D., Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of
Adolescent Girls
 Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out, Odd Girl Speaks Out, Curse
of the Good Girl
 Michael Thompson, Raising Cain, Speaking of Boys, It’s a
Boy!

Communication Resources
• “Stereotype Threat” by Joshua Aronson
• Brenda J. Allen, Difference Matters: Communicating
Social Identity
• William Gudykunst, Cross-Cultural and Intercultural
Comunication
• Milton Bennett, PhD, Intercultural Communication
Institute www.intercultural.org
• “Non-Verbal Communication Across Cultures” by Erica
Hagen, Intercultural Communication Resources
• Thiagi.com
• Thrive! Team Dynamics
• http://www.analytictech.com/mb021/action_science_
history.htm

Miscellaneous Resources
• Karen Bradberry and Johnnie Foreman, “Privilege and
Power,” Summer Diversity Institute, National Association
of Independent Schools, 2009
• Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman, Nurture Shock
• Kevin Jennings, GLSEN (Gay Lesbian and Straight Education
Network) www.glsen.org
• Allan G. Johnson, Privilege, Power, and Difference
• Johnnie McKinley, “Leveling the Playing Field and Raising
African American Students’ Achievement in Twenty-nine
Urban Classrooms,” New Horizons for Learning,
http://www.newhorizons.org/strategies/differentiated/
mckinley.htm
Michael J Nakkula and Eric Toshalis, Understanding Youth.

OES Inclusion in the Early Years Faculty

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