The document provides examples of thesis statements and evaluates which ones are more effective. It discusses what makes an effective thesis statement, including having a clear topic or idea, an opinion on the topic, and being specific. The document also covers the writing and revision process, including outlining, drafting, peer review, and citing sources.

1. Review and clarification

 Thesis Quiz: Find the Better Thesis Statement
Which of the following pairs of thesis statements would be better for a
research paper? Think about it. Choose statements that avoid being
neutral, offer a point of view (a position of some sort), and express that
view specifically within the statement.
 A.) In the last two decades, many new
diseases such as AIDS, West Nile Virus, and
SARS have appeared on the scene.
 B.) Newly discovered diseases such as
AIDS, West Nile Virus, and SARS are a serious
threat to the health of millions of people the
world over.

2. The Writing Process and Peer Revision

3. 2
A.) The fast food industry has taken much of the
blame for America’s health problems, but recent
research suggests the problem is far more
complex.
B.) Because health concerns have become a
widespread problem in America, many people have
begun to avoid fast food and to eat healthier
foods.

4. 3
A.) Unlike many other
professional
sports, baseball provides
no way of keeping small
market teams competitive
with teams from larger
cities.
B.) Unable to keep up with
competition from other
sports, Major League
Baseball has become an
outdated institution in
need of serious reform.

5. A.) The USA PATRIOT
4
Act, however well
intentioned, deals a
serious blow to the civil
liberties of all
Americans.
B.) The USA PATRIOT Act
gives the government
access to voice mail and
electronic
surveillance, not to
mention other means of
investigating suspected
terrorists.

6. What makes an effective thesis?
One idea or
topic
Opinion or idea
about the topic

7. Prewriting
- Thoughts, ideas, research
- Outline format
- Block
- Alternating

8. Creating the essay:
Introduction Paragraph
Thesis Statement
Subtopic Statement
Hook
Body Paragraphs – based on outline format choice
Conclusion – restating thesis

9. Reading aloud
Proofing –
Grammar mistakes
Word choice
Transitional Words, phrases, sentences
logical organizational pattern
Peer Feedback

10. Works Cited items are listed alphabetically at the end of the
research paper and should be double-spaced. Parenthetical
references are items referred to in the body of the paper.
Scholarly Journal Article, Print (One Author)
Works Cited:
Myerson, Joel. "A Calendar of Transcendental Club Meetings." American Literature 44
(1972): 197-207. Print.
Parenthetical:
(Myerson 199)
Scholarly Journal Article, Print (Two Authors)
Works Cited:
Brown, Cecelia M., and Lina Ortega. "Information-seeking Behavior of Physical Science
Librarians: Research and Practice." College & Research Libraries 66 (2005): 231-247. Print.
Parenthetical:
(Brown and Ortega 237)

11. Works Cited:
Cook Mariana. "Cousin Kay." Victoria Nov. 2001: 27-28. Print.
Parenthetical:
(Cook 28)

12. Works Cited:
Johnston, David Cay. "Got Game? Got Old Game?" New York
Times 11 July 2003, late ed. Print.
Parenthetical:
(Johnston F1)

13. Works Cited:
"Magna Carta." The New Encyclopedia Britannica. 15th ed. 1998.
Print.
Parenthetical:
("Magna Carta" 521)

14. Works Cited:
Johnson, Charles Richard. Middle Passage. New York:
Atheneum, 1990. Print.
Parenthetical:
(Johnson 176)
Leakey, Mary D. and Louis S. B. Leakey. Some String Figures from
North East Angola. Lisboa: Museu do Dundo, 1949. Print.
Parenthetical:
(Leakey and Leakey 92)

15. Electronic Book
Works Cited:
Hartog, Hendrick. Man and Wife in America: A History. 2002.
Web. 27 August 2007.
Parenthetical:
(Hartog)
Item from a Library Database
Clark, Zsuzsanna. "From Saturday-Night Poetry to Big Brother." New
Statesman 132 (21 July 2003): 32. Academic Search Complete. Web. 15
Sept. 2010.
Parenthetical:
(Clark)

16. Scholarly Electronic Journal Article
Works Cited:
Scott, Jonathan. "Advanced, Repressed, and Popular:
Langston Hughes During the Cold War." College Literature
33, no. 2 (Spring 2006): 30-51. Web. 15 Sept. 2010.
Parenthetical:
(Scott)

17. http://www.easybib.com/
This is a free source but you still need to know
what information you need for citing and
check for accuracy

18. • Quiz
• Peer Review
• Complete Revision and Draft 2
• Including citing sources
September 22 Introduce Essay 3 Analysis
Due: Draft 2 - Essay 2
The Writing Process: Compare/Contrast for grading
Thesis Statement
Prewriting Study: 448-454
Critical Reading and Thinking Study: 849 - 860
Drafting
Focus: Word Choice