INTERPERSONAL AND COMMUNICATION SKILLS- C.5

© 2006 Universiti Tun Abdul Razak (UNITAR)
Interpersonal Communication
and Self

Definition : Identify the definition of
self
• Who are you?? Try to describe yourself
and you will end up with so many
descriptions..
• You may say that all this characteristics
represent yourself and if one of these
characteristics is omitted, you may not
feel your normal self..

Mead’s definition of self :
• “ the ability to take oneself as an object
and the self has the peculiar to be both
subject and object”
• object subject
• Example : describing oneself as good-
looking or a “book worm”.

Mead’s definition of self
• Self is presumed as a social process.
• The development of self, can be enriched
through an exposure to social activities as
well as social relationships.
• Furthermore, according to Mead, the self is
very much related to the mind in which “the
body is not a self and becomes a self only
when a mind is developed”.

Mead’s definition of self
• The description you make about
yourself actually reflect the real you.
• For example : if you think that you are a
smart person, you will behave and act
accordingly to ensure that your attitude
fits that description.

The self can be divided into 3 dimensions
which are :
• Material Self
• Social Self
• Spiritual Self

Material Self
• Refers to the physical
elements that reflect who
you are.
• These physical elements
should reflect who you are
in material terms, which are
tangible.

Material Self
• Thus, your ‘self’ is judged on the way
you dress, the kind of cloths you wear,
the car you drive and the type of home
you prefer or own

Social Self
• The social self is portrayed in the
interaction with others that reflect who
you are.
• As the self is reflected through
interactions with other people, you will
have a variety of ‘selves’ that will
respond accordingly to changes in
current situation and roles.

Social Self
• For instance, the social self is reflected
when you interact with your lectures in a
formal way while you interact informally
with close friends or course mate.
Formal Informal

Spiritual Self
• The spiritual self
refers to your reflection
on values, belief, and
moral attitude.

Spiritual Self
• Different from the material and social
selves, the spiritual self involve
introspection about values, belief, and
moral or attitude.

Spiritual Self
• If we analyze the
spiritual self future,
the ‘values’ refer to
“enduring concept of
good and bad, right
and wrong”.

Spiritual Self
• The values which we have in us are the
values, which come from our “earliest
interpersonal relationship; for almost all
of us, our parent shape our values”
(Beebe,1999)

Spiritual Self
• On the other hand, “belief” in the definition of
the spiritual self refers to “the way in which
you structure your understanding of reality;
that is true and what is false” (Beebe,1999)
• Meanwhile ‘morals’ or ‘attitudes’ are a
“learned predisposition to respond to a
person, object, or idea in a favorable or
unfavorable way”(Beebe,1999)

Spiritual Self
• For example, there are certain things or a
particular that you do not like in class and
there are some things or people that you like
to work with.
• In general, the spiritual self includes the
concept of values, belief, and morals or
attitude, which can be demonstrate in your
belief or disbelief in the existence of god, to
name an example.

Morals or Attitudes
Beliefs
Values
 Values are central to our behavior and concept of self. In addition,
values are the foundation of our beliefs. Values can be most difficult to
change.
 Morals or attitudes are at outer edge of the circle because they are
most likely to change (Beebe et. al, page 39, 1999).
A FIGURE OF VALUES, BELIEF, AND MORALS
OR ATTITUDES IN RELATION TO SELF

CONCLUSION
The self is an extremely important concept
as it reflects how we view ourselves as
individuals. It is even more important
considering we live in a community, where
we have to constantly interact and
communicate with others. Our material,
social and spiritual selves strongly affect
our behaviors and eventually influence our
communication with others and how others
perceive us.

SELF-CONCEPT

WHAT IT SELF CONCEPT?
 Self-concept is your view of
yourself as a person. It is derived
from how we view ourselves in
particular situations and as a
member of various groups.
(Gudykunst, 1994).
 On the same line, DeVito (1998)
explains that self-concept consists of
our feelings and thoughts about our
strenghts, weaknesses, abilities and
limitations.

WHY THE NEED TO UNDERSTAND
SELF-CONCEPT?
In communication, our self-
conceptions influence the way
we communicate with others
and also the people with
whom we choose
(consciously of
unconsciously) to form
relationships.

4 MAIN SOURCES:
 Other’s images - the perceptions of
others that have been revealed to
you.
 Social comparison - the
comparisons you make between
yourself and others.
 Cultural teachings - the teachings
of your culture.
 Interpretations and evaluations -
the way you interpret and evaluate
your own thoughts and behavior.

This figure depicts the
four sources of self-
concept :
 Other’s Images
 Social Comparisons
 Cultural Teachings
 Interpretations and
evaluations

• ‘Other’s images’
• Is the first source of self-
concept that explains how
other people see you as a
person.
• The images or behaviors
that you present are the
perceptions of others of
you and not your own
thoughts.

• ‘Social comparisons’
• Is defined as how you see
yourself in comparison to
other such as your peers.
• For instance, you can tell
the level of your English
language when you
compare your English
exam scores with your
classmate.

• Cultural teachings’
• Cultural teachings here include
the teachings of the people
around you such as your
parents, you your lecturers, or
the media, which mould your
attitude, values, and beliefs.
• Whether you have a negative
self-concept, it would have
been greatly influenced by your
cultural teachings.

• For instance, if it is considered
a norm in your culture that women
should get married by the age of
25 and if you fail to do so, your
culture will, then, contribute to
your negative self-concept.
• This is because you will probably
be perceived negatively for not
following the norm.

• In contrast, if you have achieved
things regarded as “ a success” in
your culture, you will certainly develop
a positive self-
concept, as you feel good that you can
comply with your culture’s norms and
perceptions
• For instance, if a Muslim child
completes reading the Quran before
the age of ten, it is considered a
success in the Islamic culture and this
will develop a positive self-concept in
the child

• ‘Interpretations and evaluations’
• It is actually how you evaluate
and interpret your own feelings
and behaviors.
• Different from the other sources
of self-concept, this particular
source involves how you react
to, interpret, and evaluate your
own self.
• From your very own reaction,
interpretations, and evaluations
of your actions, you can finally
from your own self-concept.

Conclusion
We can say that self-concept is vital to our
development as a human being especially when it
involves interactions and communications with other
people in relation to our own culture or organization.

SELF IMAGE AND SELF
IDENTITY
: The concept of self-image can be defined as the
image of yourself from other people's point of
view and your point of view, while the concept of
self-identity is the attitudes and the overall
identity of you as a person
: The concept of self-image and self-identity is
inter-related as the development of the self-
image leads to the development of the self-
identity. For instance, if Mr X, has a positive self-
image it will lead to the development of a
positive and strong self-identity of Mr. X.

SELF-ESTEEM @ SELF-
WORTH
Your evaluation of your
worth or value based on
your perception of such
things as your skills,
ability, talents and
appearance.

How to develop a strong self
identity:
: Need to have your perceived self-
worth, which is the value you
place on yourself.
: You also need to look at yourself
from other people's viewpoints.
How do people see you?
: It will be more significant if you
look at those people, who are
important to you such as your
parents, your brothers and
sisters, or your superior.
SELF IDENTITY

SELF CONCEPT AND
COMMUNICATION
STYLE: In communication, your self-concept
filters the information that you receive
in your interactions with other people.
This will determine your approach and
response to as well as interpretation of
messages.
: Therefore, your self-concept also
influences your ability to be sensitive
to others, self- fulfilling prophecies,
interpretation of messages, and
communication style.
: Self-concept that shape our habits,
beliefs, attitudes, morals as well as

COMMUNICATION
STYLES THAT ARE
RELATED TO SELF
>ANALYTICALS
>DRIVERS
>EXPRESSIVES
>AMIABLES

ANALYTICALS
> This kind of people tends to be highly
task-oriented and focused on the job to
be done rather than on relationships.
> They also like structures and systems
and their homes or offices are highly
organized.
> They like to accomplish their tasks by
themselves rather than working with
other people.

DRIVERS
> This means that this kind of people
is highly task-oriented, more likely to
control their emotions, and
efficiency-striven.
> They can also be aloof, cool, and
abrupt.
> They like to have barriers when
communicating so they prefer to sit
across you with a table in between.

EXPRESSIVERS
> Expressive can be full with emotions
and impulsions though they often
feel the need to control
relationships.
> They also want to get the job done
but they will do it in a more
emotional way.
> Expressive may face more challenge
trying to balance their work and look
after the feelings of others.

AMIABLES
> They are more concerned about
relationships than work.
> There is a need for them to fulfill
other people's social needs.
> In their offices, they will prefer to sit
in a round table side by side with
you.
> Amiables will ensure that you are
comfortable and feel welcomed
when talking to them.

INTERPERSONAL AND COMMUNICATION SKILLS- C.5

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INTERPERSONAL AND COMMUNICATION SKILLS- C.5