Find out what it means to have tact and diplomacy. Read on how people often invalidate each other and how you can improve on your effective listening skills.
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TACT & DI PLOMACY
Diplomacy encompasses having your needs met in a way that doesn’t demoralize
or hurt another person.
Tact includes taking the feelings of another into consideration and responding in a
way that demonstrates understanding.
Examples of lack of Tact and Diplomacy are numerous
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I N VALI DATI ON
Invalidation is the opposite of Tact & Diplomacy
Invalidation is an action that denies another person’s right to be heard and
understood.
1% invalidate « intentionally to spread the misery and manipulate/control
others »
20% invalidate «semiconsciously as a defense mechanism. »
All of us do it at times, most not intentionaly.
Invalidation is
The most lethal form of emotional abuse,
Killing confidence, creativity, and individuality
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1 0 WAY S TO I N VALI DATE OTHE RS
Ordering: « I don’t care what your boss told you to do. I’m telling you that I want you to do it my way. »
Threatening: « If you don’t come up to speed, you won’t have your job for long . »
Preaching: « You shouldn’t act like a spoiled brat. Maybe that worked when you were a little girl, but it doesn’t work
now. »
Giving solution: « Just ignore him when he insults you. »
Lecturing: « In this economy, you should be happy you have a job. »
Critisizing: « You are wrong. »
Blaming: « John was the one who insisted we do it this way. »
Minimising: « Oh, it’s not that bad. ». « You are making too much of this. »
Changing the subject: « Forget about your concerns. How was your weekend? »
Denial: « You will see it differently tomorrow. »