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DUDES, DO BETTER:
DISMANTLING TOXIC MASCULINITY
IN THE WORKPLACE
VISUALIZE THAT
TOXIC PERSON
AT YOUR WORK
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com @jeffharryplays
VISUALIZE A
CO-WORKER THAT
YOU ADMIRE
RediscoverYourPlay.com @jeffharryplays
Reflect On
The Past
Topics We Are Covering
How Much Is
Toxic Masculine
Leadership Costing Us?
What Is Effective
Leadership?
Provide Solutions
For Every Level of
The Workforce
Identify Actions
That Can Be
Implemented
Immediately
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com @jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com @jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
• Play (No Business Plan)
• Intuition (Picked Fun People)
• Prioritize relationships over
short-term profits
• Followed Our Curiosity
• Focused On Inspiring Staff
Built The Largest
LEGO-Inspired STEM
Organization In The U.S.
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com @jeffharryplays
What Words Describe
Toxic Masculinity
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Toxic Masculinity Defintion
Toxic masculinity is a narrow and
repressive description of manhood,
designating “being a man” as defined by
dominance, aggression, individualism &
lack of emotion.
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Toxic Masculine Leadership Traits
Bullying
Avoid losing
at all costs
Restraining
one’s
emotions
During conflict,
showing
strength
through
aggression
Exhibiting
dominance
masking
insecurity
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
We Celebrate Toxic Masculine Leaders
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Toxic Masculine Leadership
Drove The Great Resignation
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com @jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com @jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
• What Triggers You About The Toxic Person
At Work?
• How Does The Presence Of This Toxic
Person Affect Your Work?
If you are currently not dealing with toxicity in your workplace, refer to a previous experience.
Triggers & Impact
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Toxic People Make You Stupid
Performed 25%
worse
Mean
9 Times Less
Likely To Help
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Assumption: Toxic Masculine Leadership
Produces Higher Profits
Data Does
Not Lie
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Reality: Toxic Masculine Leadership
Costs Companies Billions
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
How Much Can Toxic Masculine Leadership
Cost A U.S. Company?
Lost Revenue /Employee
In Productivity $14,000*
*Michigan State University Study: How incivility spreads in the workplace
Cost To Recruit &
Train New Staff
$30,000 - $45,000*
*SHRM Study Found It Cost 6 - 9 months of an employees salary to replace them
Cost To Defend An
Employee Lawsuit
$75,000 - $150,000*
*Litigation Cost Survey of Major Companies - USCourts.gov
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Diversity of Perspective
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
What Traits Does Your Team Currently Have?
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
What Traits Are Currently Missing From Your Leadership Team?
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Traits Teams Need For Successful Leadership
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Determine The Primary Motivations
& Drivers Of The Organization
• What Are The Main Goals Of Your Organization?
• What Are The Values Of The Organization?
• What Are The Main Drivers Of The Decision Makers?
• What Are The Primary Motivations Of The Toxic Staffer?
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
For Dealing With The Toxic
Person At Work
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com/hraoakbrook @jeffharryplays
Where Do We Begin?
CEO
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
Entry & Junior Level Staff
• Find allies & employees who
have similar issues
• Gather data/documentation
on toxic staffers
• Recognize the leverage and
access you have
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Mid-Level Management
• Investigate why staff have left
• Ask your employees if you
have lost or gained their trust
• Focus on your circle of
influence
• Experiment with new ways of
leading staff
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Executive & C-Suite Level
• What is the worst behavior
you are tolerating?
• Reassess what metrics you
are measuring success by
• Fund your committees &
resource groups
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Strategy & Implementation
• What Are Your Goals In Addressing This Toxicity At Your
Work?
• What Are The Initial Steps You Can Do To Begin?
• Who Are Your Allies That Can Help Implement This Strategy?
• What Are The Obstacles That May Get In Your Way?
If you are currently not dealing with toxicity in your workplace, refers to a previous experience.
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Crossroads To Determine The Future of Work
Pre-
Pandemic
Leadership
Post-
Pandemic
Leadership
Shared
Humanity
Collaboration
Inspiration
Intuition
Individualism
Control
Ego
Competition
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
RediscoverYourPlay.com @jeffharryplays
Learn From
The Mistakes
of The Past
Topics We Covered
Outline
The Costs of Toxic
Masculine Leadership
Give Examples Of
A Healthy Masculine &
Feminine Leadership
Pick A Solution
That Works For
Your Team
Take Immediate Action
& Remember To Practice
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseontheplay
@jeffharryplays
Let’s Dismantle
Toxic Masculinity Together
RediscoverYourPlay.com/pauseonthep
lay
jeff@rediscoveryourplay.com
@jeffharryplays

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Editor's Notes

  1. Two part exercise. Part 1: A-Hole to every one If you did like it why do you think that is? If you didn’t what about it made it feel that way? Part 2: High fives to everyone How did two environments feel?
  2. Two part exercise. Part 1: A-Hole to every one If you did like it why do you think that is? If you didn’t what about it made it feel that way? Part 2: High fives to everyone How did two environments feel?
  3. Two part exercise. Part 1: A-Hole to every one If you did like it why do you think that is? If you didn’t what about it made it feel that way? Part 2: High fives to everyone How did two environments feel?
  4. Two part exercise. Part 1: A-Hole to every one If you did like it why do you think that is? If you didn’t what about it made it feel that way? Part 2: High fives to everyone How did two environments feel?
  5. Two part exercise. Part 1: A-Hole to every one If you did like it why do you think that is? If you didn’t what about it made it feel that way? Part 2: High fives to everyone How did two environments feel?
  6. Two part exercise. Part 1: A-Hole to every one If you did like it why do you think that is? If you didn’t what about it made it feel that way? Part 2: High fives to everyone How did two environments feel?
  7. That is what you are up against.  A society that unconsciously tells you not to be yourself.  Narrows your ability to believe what is possible.  Communicates to you that not only should you not be yourself, but also that you are not enough.  That something is missing in you. That you don’t know who you are and that you should follow other’s lead.  Every time you scroll on social media, the message is you’re not enough It can permeate your soul and you end up just feeling dazed, confused, and scared of being yourself.
  8. Sharing our diffusion methods for A-Hole #1. Redirecting The A-Hole Give them a task If someone is negative person that keeps criticizing ideas and bringing down the momentum, you need to acknowledge them and give them a task, save their ideas to the end, after all the ideas and let us know the pros and cons. 2. Naming What Exists Naming what exists and how it impacted you.  A-hole that is bringing down momentum that is making them inferior, let them know how their words and actions impacted you, you don't know what their intent was, but it still impacted the group.   3. Your Boss Is The A-Hole Naming what exists to your boss Addressing it to the Powers that be, mentioning the impact it is having on the team, and whether they want tolerate it
  9. Two part exercise. Part 1: A-Hole to every one If you did like it why do you think that is? If you didn’t what about it made it feel that way? Part 2: High fives to everyone How did two environments feel?