Conflict Management
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This document discusses different styles for managing conflict: avoiding, accommodating, compromising, collaborating, and competing. It provides tips for dealing with conflict such as researching the situation, listening to others, finding common ground, and keeping an open mind. The document encourages making the conflict about the issue rather than personal attacks and focusing on facts over opinions. It concludes by asking the reader to evaluate their typical conflict style and ways they can improve.
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Conflict Management
- 2. Conflict Management • Styles • Tips for dealing with conflict • Conflict Negotiation • Discussion
- 3. Competitive Collaborating Concern for Self Compromising Avoiding Accommodating Concern for Others
- 4. Avoiding
- 5. Competitive Concern for Self Concern for Others
- 6. Competitive
- 7. Concern for Self Accommodating Concern for Others
- 9. Concern for Self Compromising Concern for Others
- 10. Compromising
- 11. Collaborating Concern for Self Concern for Others
- 12. Collaborating
- 13. Competitive Collaborating Concern for Self Compromising Avoiding Accommodating Concern for Others
- 16. Dealing with Conflict 1. Research the situation 2. Schmooz 3. Listen 4. Ask questions before asserting your own views. 5. Find common grounds 6. Defuse
- 17. Other tips – Make the conflict about the issue, not the person. – Keep an open mind, be prepared to be wrong. – Ask, don’t accuse. • Instead of saying, “That will destroy our budget,” ask, “Will our budget be able to handle this?” – Focus on facts, not opinions – Be descriptive, do not evaluate.
- 18. Discussion What styles do you typically use when deal with conflict? Evaluate this. What can you do better?
Editor's Notes
- The type of conflict you are experiencing may determine the conflict style you use.
- Competitive – typically what we think of when we think of dealing with conflict. That is we want to win and get the most out of the situation we can. The problem is, we sometimes run into problems. For example, many people experience the “winner’s curse.” That is, people want to win so baddly that the end up with the wrong solution. “Ebay” for example, people spend too much on an item because they get competitive instead of thinking rationally. Baseball players will take substances that make them stronger short term, but have long term problems. Mutual gains, on the other hand, encourages both parties to come to terms that work effectivly for BOTH parties. You don’t want to win, you want to have the best deal for both parties. Some people believe that competitve is more effective, typically this is false. By being competitive, you fail to engage in the creative process. You may end up losing instead of coming up with a good deal. Even if you win, you may burn bridges or lose face in the process.
- Be sure you know both sides. Try to take the opposite sides perspective and understand their goals, etc. Let them know it is not a personal attack. Be friendly and kind. You don’t want them to become defensive or intimidated. In both of these cases, you may win, but you lost future interactions with them. Let the others speak. You will get your chance, but you want them to feel like you understand their problem. Again, be sure you have a clear understanding. Easier said than done. What I am saying here is focus on what you have in common, not on your differences. This will keep the ball rolling. Be able to joke when things get too heated. If you are not funny, maybe ask for a break. Don’t “leave” the negotiaiton, but take a few moments to get on an even keel.