1. Conflicts happen

2. There are differences so
there will be conflicts

3. How do we manage
differences?

4. It’s about “Getting to
YES”
 William Ury, 1981:
 Synopsis -This classic
book on negotiation theory
is a product of the Harvard
Negotiation Project. It
espouses Principled
Negotiation, a specific
negotiation method that
aims for Win-Win
agreements.

5. Assertive communication
means…
 To be positive about self and others

6. Recall synergy:
 “The state achieved when the combined efforts of the
parts exceed their individual efforts” – Barnett &
O’Rourke

7. Theory vs. reality

8. Identify behaviour roles
 Aggressive
 Submissive
 Manipulative
 Assertive

9. Shared common
understanding

10. Prepare
 Make parties comfortable
 Get all on the same page – set tone
 Ensure a common understanding of concepts
 Invite feedback

11. Define conflict on
strategies, not
 Emotions
personalities
 Stereotyping
 Gender
 Culture
 Experience
 expectation

12. Four F’s
 Facts
 Feelings
 Focus on action
 Feedback

13. Own the message
• You’re always after dinner
late to work you lazy pig?
• You make me • Why can’t you
mad when you get your report
leave the in on time?
kitchen a • Why is your
mess. car always out
• Why is it of gas?
always me
who cleans up

14. Conflict management is:
 Competition
 Withdrawl
 Accommodation
 Compromise
 collaboration

15. Find your personal
power!
 Funny, compassionate, team player, hard worker -

16. “Lucky 7”
 Pick personal powers you’d like and repeat them
seven times – voila!