Assertive Behavior 2007


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Delivered to EFL teachers at Alianza Cultural Uruguay -EEUU in 2007

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  • Context of communication
  • Assertive Behavior 2007

    1. 1. ASSERTIVENESS A workshop for teachers Lic. Mariana Porta
    2. 2. WHY WOULD TEACHERS NEED IT? <ul><li>The teaching profession requires interaction at many levels. </li></ul><ul><li>Assertive behavior improves the quality and effectiveness of the interaction. </li></ul>
    3. 3. IN AND OUTSIDE THE CLASSROOM <ul><li>CLASSROOM CONTEXT </li></ul><ul><li>giving feedback </li></ul><ul><li>keeping discipline </li></ul><ul><li>supporting your choices </li></ul><ul><li>setting expectations </li></ul><ul><li>INSTITUTIONAL CONTEXT </li></ul><ul><li>teacher -- parent </li></ul><ul><li>teacher -- student </li></ul><ul><li>teacher -- colleague </li></ul><ul><li>teacher -- supervisor </li></ul><ul><li>teacher -- staff member </li></ul>
    4. 4. WHAT IS TRUE ABOUT ASSERTIVENESS? Mini Quiz It is a universal principle. It is based on free will. It is specific to a person in a situation. It is a kind of behavior. It is a personal quality. no yes
    5. 5. DEFINTION 1 <ul><li>Assertiveness is a kind of behavior. </li></ul><ul><li>It is specific to a person in a situation. </li></ul><ul><li>It is based on free will. </li></ul><ul><li>It is socially effective. </li></ul><ul><li>It is culture-dependent. </li></ul>
    6. 6. TASK 1 <ul><li>You are in a queue at the movie theater. Somebody comes in and jumps the queue right in front of you. What do you choose to do? </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Nothing. You just bear it. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Vent comments out loud such as “… some people are such/so ….” but you don’t face the person. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Face the guy bluntly and furiously, after all who does he think he is? </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Approach the man and politely but firmly tell him that he should take his turn at the end of the line. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Other … </li></ul></ul>
    7. 7. ASSERTIVENESS DEFINITION 2 <ul><li>Assertiveness is defined as behavior which enables people to act in their own best interest by expressing their thoughts, feelings, desires and opinions directly, honestly and appropriately. </li></ul>
    8. 8. ASSERTIVENESS DEFINITION 3 <ul><li>Assertiveness is standing up for your rights while respecting the rights of others. </li></ul>
    9. 9. ADVANTAGES OF BEHAVING ASSERTIVELY <ul><li>Respecting yourself and others </li></ul><ul><li>Developing healthy relationships </li></ul><ul><li>Giving others a chance to change their behavior </li></ul><ul><li>Feeling better about yourself </li></ul><ul><li>Preventing conflict </li></ul><ul><li>Defending basic human rights </li></ul>
    10. 10. SOME BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS <ul><li>The right to be treated with dignity and respect </li></ul><ul><li>The right to reject requests without feeling guilty </li></ul><ul><li>The right to experience and express feelings. </li></ul><ul><li>The right to stop and think before acting. </li></ul><ul><li>The right to change an opinion. </li></ul><ul><li>The right to ask for what you need. </li></ul><ul><li>The right to do less than you are able to do. </li></ul><ul><li>The right to be independent. </li></ul><ul><li>The right to decide over your own body and property. </li></ul><ul><li>The right not to behave assertively. </li></ul>
    11. 11. RIGHTS <ul><li>BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Rights all human beings have </li></ul></ul><ul><li>RIGHTS GIVEN BY THE ROLE </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Rights a person has as part of his/her role attributions. </li></ul></ul>
    13. 13. PASSIVE BEHAVIOR <ul><li>Passiveness is having respect for other's rights while having no respect for your own. </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Ex. denial, isolation </li></ul></ul>
    14. 14. AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOR <ul><li>Getting what you want with no regard to the rights of others. </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Ex. Verbal offense, threat, hostile comments </li></ul></ul>
    15. 15. PASSIVE AGRESSIVE <ul><li>It is having no respect for anyone's rights. </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Ex. Sarcasm, malicious comments, rumor, manipulation, double messages. </li></ul></ul>
    16. 16. Task 2 <ul><li>Chart with alternative forms of behavior </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Read </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Classify examples. </li></ul></ul>
    17. 17. Why would someone not be assertive? <ul><li>Cultural differences. </li></ul><ul><li>Positive reward to nonassertive behavior. </li></ul><ul><li>Irrational Beliefs and Ideas “Roadblocks” or “Myths” </li></ul>ABC Cognitive Model
    18. 19. Spiders bite people Spiders can kill Spiders are powerful Spiders are quick You never know when a spider can bite you. This spider could come after me. ABC MODEL THE “B” BEHIND BEHAVIOR (I)
    19. 20. THE “B” BEHIND BEHAVIOR (II) ABC Cognitive Model A B C stimulus mental process overt behavior
    20. 21. THE “B” BEHIND BEHAVIOR (III) <ul><li>It may contain roadblocks to assertive behavior : </li></ul><ul><ul><li>“ I must avoid making questions or statements that will make me look stupid or ignorant”. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>“ If I assert myself in any relationship others will get mad at me”. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>“ If I say I don’t agree my supervisor will think I am not being supportive” </li></ul></ul>
    21. 22. Task 3. <ul><li>Roadblocks to assertive behavior </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Read these roadblocks to assertive behavior and think of their assertive counterpart. </li></ul></ul>
    22. 23. ASSERTIVE DISCIPLINE IN THE CLASSROOM <ul><li>Dismiss the thought that there is any acceptable reason for misbehavior . </li></ul><ul><li>Decide which rules you wish to implement. </li></ul><ul><li>Determine negative consequences for noncompliance. </li></ul><ul><li>Determine positive consequences for appropriate behavior. </li></ul>
    23. 24. TEACHER TALK <ul><li>&quot;Tish, I like the way you raised your hand before speaking.” </li></ul><ul><li>“ Ana, please start putting your project away. It's been five minutes since I asked you to clean up.” </li></ul><ul><li>&quot;I give up. If this group doesn't want to listen , its your problem, not mine.&quot; </li></ul>
    24. 25. Body language as related to assertive behavior: <ul><li>1. Eye contact and facial expression : Maintain direct eye contact, appear interested and alert, but not angry. </li></ul><ul><li>2. Posture: Stand or sit erect, possibly leaning forward slightly. </li></ul><ul><li>3. Distance and contact : Stand or sit at a normal conversational distance from the other. </li></ul>
    25. 26. Body language as related to assertive behavior: <ul><li>4. Gestures: Use relaxed, conversational gestures. </li></ul><ul><li>5. Voice : Use a factual, not emotional tone of voice. Sound determined and full of conviction, but not overbearing. </li></ul><ul><li>6. Timing : Choose a time when both parties are relaxed. A neutral site is best. </li></ul>
    26. 27. ETHICS: JUDGEMENT: What is the right thing to do? ASSERTIVNESS: BEHAVIOR What is the assertive way of acting? INTERPERSONAL SKILLS: CULTURE AND COMMUNICATION How will I communicate my ideas so that I am understood?