Crucial Conversations In Social Media
                            The truth you should know about the art of conversation ...
I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know that you're afraid... you're
           afraid of us. You're afraid of...
How Does The Matrix
                                    fit with Social Media?




Friday, January 22, 2010
The Matrix offers an excellent allegory for our highly
   COMMERCIALIZED, MEDIA DRIVEN society.




          Industrializa...
Social Media offers a great OPPORTUNITY for businesses to
        reconnect with people.




                           if ...
Markets are conversations.
                                         The Cluetrain Manifesto




Friday, January 22, 2010
e
              oes th
      What d           on
            on versati
     word c
        rea lly mea
                  ...
Your company can have
                           Engaging Conversations
                                             with ...
you must understand the FOUR ways
             communicating with MARKETS has CHANGED




Friday, January 22, 2010
MARKET IDEA No 1
 Technology has given us power. The time of the the passive masses has passed.




Friday, January 22, 20...
MARKET IDEA No 2
                           We live in an attention economy. Lots of people are talking
                  ...
MARKET IDEA No 3
                            New ways of communicating inside and
                           outside organ...
MARKET IDEA No 4
   We don’t want to be ‘talked at’ but rather ‘talked to’




Friday, January 22, 2010
Why
                           Conversation
                               and Social Media?




Friday, January 22, 2010
Conversation is a FUNDAMENTAL
                                      part of being HUMAN.




                             ...
‘‘
            ‘‘
                             The human condition changes, yet never
                            changes....
Because companies have not evolved...


    commerce               has been effectively divorced from




                 ...
Social media tools don’t make the CONVERSATION they support it.




    By understanding how social media support the HUMA...
The Matrix was about the struggle between man and machine
                 but it parallels some of the struggles that are...
What is a
                           Conversation?




Friday, January 22, 2010
What is a
                           Crucial Conversation?




Friday, January 22, 2010
When a crucial conversation occurs you have THREE choices ...




Friday, January 22, 2010
avoid         the
                           conversation, and
                                  suffer the
               ...
handle the conversation poorly
                           and suffer the consequences




Friday, January 22, 2010
discover how to communicate
     best when it matters most.




Friday, January 22, 2010
Why are
                           Crucial Conversations
                                          so important?




Frida...
We benefit from more ACCURATE and RELEVANT information




                               Make BETTER CHOICES, and are more...
The nature of conversation and verbal exchange is
                  surprisingly ENDURING even across culture and time...
...
Friday, January 22, 2010
So are there real RIGHTS and
                             WRONGS in conversation?

                                  Cicer...
Cicero wrote the essay “On Duties” in 44BC. In it he set forth the
    following rules, which all could still apply today ...
Why Do We
                Suck At Crucial Conversations?




Friday, January 22, 2010
Do you work in a
                           Command and Control
                                 Environment?




        ...
Does                                     n
                                                   dialo                       ...
We live is a CULTURE OF CONFLICT where winning is everything.




Friday, January 22, 2010
Friday, January 22, 2010
Most people when in an argument don't have a goal of
             LISTENING, instead we use every possible tactic to win. ...
Most people when in an argument don't have a goal of
             LISTENING, instead we use every possible tactic to win. ...
The Forgotten Art of Dialog
            The key to successful conversation is being open and honest
             in expres...
Critique and Criticism are not the same thing.
      critique in this sense is not a general term for analysis or critical...
3
                           Practices to
                           Start Your
                           Conversations

...
PRACTICE 1:
         Get to know who you are talking to.




Friday, January 22, 2010
PRACTICE 2:

                           Listening
                           is more important
                           ...
PRACTICE 3:



                            If you’re going to
                             be talking - have
             ...
There are SIX stories you need to master ...




Friday, January 22, 2010
I just met you
                                                Who Are You
                                               ...
What does this person
                     Want From Me?
               Before you let someone know what's in it for them,...
OK, so
                                    What’s in it for Me?
        If your listeners are comfortable with who your ar...
OK, so
                           What Do You Stand For?
         Without a doubt the best way tell people your values in ...
How Did You
                           Know What I Was Thinking?
          When you tell a story that makes people wonder ...
What Are My
                                                  Next Steps?




                           1. Listen, Look a...
Kelsey Ruger
                           http://www.themoleskin.com




Friday, January 22, 2010
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Crucial Conversations In Social Media

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Conversation is a fundamental component of human behavior, it's part of our basic make-up, it makes us human. Even with this evolutionary fact staring us in the face many companies still don't understand how to engage in meaningful conversation with their customers and employees. This presentation will teach you how to overcome obstacles to conversation, participate in conversations about you and your market and move people to action.

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  • The way Mr. Kelsey Ruger has explained 'Conversation' is really very clear and helpful for digital marketer. Thank you for sharing this awesome presentation. :)
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Crucial Conversations In Social Media

  1. 1. Crucial Conversations In Social Media The truth you should know about the art of conversation today Kelsey Ruger Got Social Media 2008 Friday, January 22, 2010
  2. 2. I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know that you're afraid... you're afraid of us. You're afraid of change. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it's going to begin. I'm going to hang up this phone, and then I'm going to show these people what you don't want them to see. I'm going to show them a world without you. A world without rules and controls, without borders or boundaries. A world where anything is possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you Neo - The Matrix Friday, January 22, 2010
  3. 3. How Does The Matrix fit with Social Media? Friday, January 22, 2010
  4. 4. The Matrix offers an excellent allegory for our highly COMMERCIALIZED, MEDIA DRIVEN society. Industrialization Standardization Depersonalization Today’s business world isn’t that different than the world of STRUCTURE and CONTROL created by the machines in the Matrix. Friday, January 22, 2010
  5. 5. Social Media offers a great OPPORTUNITY for businesses to reconnect with people. if they realize that business today is not necessarily REPRESENTATIVE of REAL WORLD desires. Friday, January 22, 2010
  6. 6. Markets are conversations. The Cluetrain Manifesto Friday, January 22, 2010
  7. 7. e oes th What d on on versati word c rea lly mea n? Markets are conversations. The Cluetrain Manifesto e ’tw a ren ving W hy a t h ns? Wha o d a tio t ar go rsa e th nve bas e co con ics of vers atio How n? can w impro e ve ev eryda conve y rsatio n? Friday, January 22, 2010
  8. 8. Your company can have Engaging Conversations with employees and clients Friday, January 22, 2010
  9. 9. you must understand the FOUR ways communicating with MARKETS has CHANGED Friday, January 22, 2010
  10. 10. MARKET IDEA No 1 Technology has given us power. The time of the the passive masses has passed. Friday, January 22, 2010
  11. 11. MARKET IDEA No 2 We live in an attention economy. Lots of people are talking but not everyone is actively listening. Friday, January 22, 2010
  12. 12. MARKET IDEA No 3 New ways of communicating inside and outside organizations don’t exactly mesh with the ‘corporate norm’ Friday, January 22, 2010
  13. 13. MARKET IDEA No 4 We don’t want to be ‘talked at’ but rather ‘talked to’ Friday, January 22, 2010
  14. 14. Why Conversation and Social Media? Friday, January 22, 2010
  15. 15. Conversation is a FUNDAMENTAL part of being HUMAN. For centuries COMMERCE was largely based on conversation and the INTERACTION BETWEEN PEOPLE. Friday, January 22, 2010
  16. 16. ‘‘ ‘‘ The human condition changes, yet never changes. The fears, hopes and desires of a Babylonian 5,000 years ago probably closely matches our own fears, hopes and desires. Friday, January 22, 2010
  17. 17. Because companies have not evolved... commerce has been effectively divorced from people the on whom it depends Friday, January 22, 2010
  18. 18. Social media tools don’t make the CONVERSATION they support it. By understanding how social media support the HUMAN DESIRE for CONVERSATION businesses can open up vibrant INTERACTIONS with INDIVIDUALS and COMMUNITIES. Friday, January 22, 2010
  19. 19. The Matrix was about the struggle between man and machine but it parallels some of the struggles that are emerging between many businesses and consumers. Friday, January 22, 2010
  20. 20. What is a Conversation? Friday, January 22, 2010
  21. 21. What is a Crucial Conversation? Friday, January 22, 2010
  22. 22. When a crucial conversation occurs you have THREE choices ... Friday, January 22, 2010
  23. 23. avoid the conversation, and suffer the consequences. Friday, January 22, 2010
  24. 24. handle the conversation poorly and suffer the consequences Friday, January 22, 2010
  25. 25. discover how to communicate best when it matters most. Friday, January 22, 2010
  26. 26. Why are Crucial Conversations so important? Friday, January 22, 2010
  27. 27. We benefit from more ACCURATE and RELEVANT information Make BETTER CHOICES, and are more WILLING TO ACT on whatever decision they all make. Friday, January 22, 2010
  28. 28. The nature of conversation and verbal exchange is surprisingly ENDURING even across culture and time... Friday, January 22, 2010
  29. 29. Friday, January 22, 2010
  30. 30. So are there real RIGHTS and WRONGS in conversation? Cicero thought so... Friday, January 22, 2010
  31. 31. Cicero wrote the essay “On Duties” in 44BC. In it he set forth the following rules, which all could still apply today and even to the latest form of blogging “conversations”... 1. Speak clearly 2. Speak easily, but not too much, give others their turn 3. Do not interrupt 4. Be courteous 5. Deal seriously with serious matters, gracefully with lighter ones 6. Never criticize people behind their backs 7. Stick to subjects of general interests 8. Do not talk about yourself 9. Never lose your temper Friday, January 22, 2010
  32. 32. Why Do We Suck At Crucial Conversations? Friday, January 22, 2010
  33. 33. Do you work in a Command and Control Environment? Conversations are where INTELLECTUAL CAPITAL gets generated, but conversations flourish only in an atmosphere of FREE and OPEN exchange. Friday, January 22, 2010
  34. 34. Does n dialo ope ur g tak re D oes yo prece denc e the dialo g ge e zat ion wa e ove Ar of organi ? deba te? r l s ine cross s? internal wars a en t a rtm d ep If you can't GET YOURSELF RIGHT you'll have a Do dem peopl and e hard time getting conversations right. inst resp ead of e ect resp arn ect ing ? e l eb op and Do p n pe nt eople Ca pare hout pract s wit ice ac an ? tive tr ful cified listen truth cru ing sk ills? g b ein Friday, January 22, 2010
  35. 35. We live is a CULTURE OF CONFLICT where winning is everything. Friday, January 22, 2010
  36. 36. Friday, January 22, 2010
  37. 37. Most people when in an argument don't have a goal of LISTENING, instead we use every possible tactic to win. The ARGUMENT CULTURE urges us to approach the world and the people in it with an adversarial frame of mind. Friday, January 22, 2010
  38. 38. Most people when in an argument don't have a goal of LISTENING, instead we use every possible tactic to win. The ARGUMENT CULTURE urges us to approach the world and the people in it with an adversarial frame of mind. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLPuGuaZTx8 Friday, January 22, 2010
  39. 39. The Forgotten Art of Dialog The key to successful conversation is being open and honest in expressing opinions, feelings, and theories, and having a willingness to share views even when the ideas in question are controversial or unpopular. Friday, January 22, 2010
  40. 40. Critique and Criticism are not the same thing. critique in this sense is not a general term for analysis or critical review but rather a synonym for criticism. Friday, January 22, 2010
  41. 41. 3 Practices to Start Your Conversations Friday, January 22, 2010
  42. 42. PRACTICE 1: Get to know who you are talking to. Friday, January 22, 2010
  43. 43. PRACTICE 2: Listening is more important than talking Friday, January 22, 2010
  44. 44. PRACTICE 3: If you’re going to be talking - have something important to say. Friday, January 22, 2010
  45. 45. There are SIX stories you need to master ... Friday, January 22, 2010
  46. 46. I just met you Who Are You anyway? The first question people ask themselves the minute they realize you want to influence them is "who is this person". A story helps them see what you want them to see about you. If you demonstrate who you are, rather than tell me who you are, it is much more believable. A story lets you demonstrate who you are. “Why Am I” story - The Story Factor Friday, January 22, 2010
  47. 47. What does this person Want From Me? Before you let someone know what's in it for them, they want to know what's in it for you. It's a big mistake to try to hide selfish goals. This type of story usually reveals enough for people to make a distinction between healthy ambition and dishonest exploitation. If your goals are selfish, people don't mind as long as you are up-front about it, there is something in it for them, and you frame your goals in a way that makes sense to them. “Why Are I Here” story - The Story Factor Friday, January 22, 2010
  48. 48. OK, so What’s in it for Me? If your listeners are comfortable with who your are and why you are here, then they are ready to listen to what you think is in it for them. You have to take the time to find a story of your vision that that connects with people clearly. “Vision” story - The Story Factor Friday, January 22, 2010
  49. 49. OK, so What Do You Stand For? Without a doubt the best way tell people your values in by demonstration. The second best way is by telling a story. Story lets you instill values in a want that keeps people thinking for themselves. “Values in Action” story - The Story Factor Friday, January 22, 2010
  50. 50. How Did You Know What I Was Thinking? When you tell a story that makes people wonder if you are reading their minds, they love it. It isn’t hard to do. If you have done your homework on the group you wish to influence it’s easy to identify their objections. “I Know What You Are Thinking” story - The Story Friday, January 22, 2010
  51. 51. What Are My Next Steps? 1. Listen, Look and Learn. 2. Start Having Real Conversations. Friday, January 22, 2010
  52. 52. Kelsey Ruger http://www.themoleskin.com Friday, January 22, 2010

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