Writing

1. Pull up a
chair,
grab a
mug of
coffee &
let’s go! Writing

2. Part I
¶s
Topic
Sent.
¶
Analysis
N vs. V

3. Paragraphs
Various techniques to develop ¶s
¶Structure/Organization should be clear to reader
Let’s look at 6 paragraph patterns

4. Begin withwhathappened 1st&takeitfromthere
TYPICALCONNECTORS
1st, 2nd, 3rd
before, after
when, later
Example¶
1. Chronology
http://colelearning.net/who/module1/page33.html

5. At the start of 2000, the price of
combination antiretroviral drugs to
treat 1 patient for 1 year was typically
between US$ 10 000 & US$ 12 000. By
the end of 2000, prices of US$ 500 to
US$ 800 were approved for patented
and generic drugs for low- & middle-
income countries. By December 2001,
certain combinations became available
for US$350 per person per year.

6. 2. Classification & Listing
Arrange examples tosupport theclaimmade
inthetopic sentence.
Typical Connectors
1st, 2nd, 3rd, finally, also
Example¶(2slides)

7. Because of new policies and the new data about the
epidemiology of TB-HIV in the Region, the Western Pacific
Regional Office recognized that updates to the previous
regional framework were needed. The goal of this updated
framework is, therefore, to draw on global documents,
along with relevant recently published evidence, to improve
TB-HIV control through the following primary means. First,
national TB programmes and national AIDS programmes
need to work collaboratively to decrease the case-fatality
rate for persons with both TB and HIV through earlier
detection of TB and HIV and appropriate management of
people with both.

8. Second, as one of the steps to achieve this, new approaches
are needed to improve the rates of HIV testing among TB
patients and of TB screening among people living with HIV.
Third, TB laboratories must be expanded to meet the
challenges of diagnosing TB and drug-resistant TB in people
living with HIV. Finally, TB infection control measures must
be scaled up to prevent transmission of disease within
health facilities, a step made even more important in the era
of multidrug-resistant (MDR) TB and extensively drug-
resistant (XDR) TB.

9. 3. Evidence & Illustration
Support a claim made by the topic sentence
Typical Connectors
for example, for instance
in other words
Example¶

10. Some things are changing straight away. For example,
insurers can no longer refuse coverage for children,
deny coverage to children with pre-existing illnesses or
set lifetime coverage limits. Dependent adults younger
than 26 will remain covered by their parents' policy if
they are not offered health coverage at work. Small
companies (with 25 or fewer employees with an
average wage of up to US$ 50 000) can get tax credits to
offset up to 35% of the cost of premiums this year,
rising to 50% in 2014.

11. 4. Compare & Contrast
Demonstrate similarities or differences between 2 or
more people or things.
Typical Connectors
although, but, whereas, however, meanwhile,
similarly, in the same way
Example¶

12. Although West/Central Africa’s drinking-water
coverage improved from 49% in 1990 to 55% in 2004,
it needs to reach a far target of 75% by 2015. The total
number of people in the region without access to
improved drinking-water sources actually increased
over the 1990–2004 period. In Eastern/Southern
Africa, the situation for access to drinking water is
similar, as the region improved coverage from 48% in
1990 to 56% in 2004 but faces a target of 74%. In
CEE/CIS, meanwhile, coverage has stagnated at 91%;
its 2015 goal is 96 %.

13. Q
&
A
Askaquestion&let
therestofthe¶provide
theanswer.
Example¶(2slides)
5.

14. It has been several years since PAHO opted for the use
of new information technologies in the production of
educational materials and technical information
resources; however, with this material we have both
reinforced and made a significant qualitative leap
forward with regard to this option. In what way? This
multimedia tool makes more intensive use of more
sophisticated, efficient technologies and combines
different resources and uses, making it much more
versatile and easy to use while enhancing its didactic
potential.

15. In its design and development, videos, graphic
animation in two or three dimensions, images, sound,
text, graphic presentations and technical publications
are combined, creating a virtual learning environment
or atmosphere in order to learn all there is to know
about the safe hospital.

16. C
A
U
S
E
E
F
F
E
C
T
1 condition produces an effect or causes are
determined for a particular condition.
Example:
Typical Connectors
because (of), therefore, as a result (of),
consequently, for this reason, since

17. Inallcountries,enforcing thelawsthat doexistremains
achallenge. As a result, violence against children goes
unpunished. Thereismuchto bedone totrain andsupport
lawenforcement andjudicial personnel tounderstand the
keyroletheyplayinprotecting children against violence.

18. • Holds THE ¶’S MAIN message
• Gives readers the essence/main thrust of ¶
• GOOD readers look for topic sentence to get
general meaning quickly
• Clear / well-placed topic sentences makes text
MORE ACCESSIBLE
TOPIC SENTENCES

19. 2 MAIN FUNCTIONS:
• Carry the story line. If readers were to skim only the
topic sentences, they should be able to follow that
story line.
• PREDICT what info will be included in the ¶. The
sentences that make up a ¶ should reinforce the story
line established by the topic sentence.
TOPIC SENTENCES

20. • Look at the example ¶.
• The topic sentence is the 1st sentence.
• Does the topic sentence represent the main
message of the ¶?
• If it does not, what might be a more appropriate
topic sentence?
PRACTICE:
Evaluate topic sentences

21. 1. We sent two urgent shipments using your courier
company to our office in Newark. We found both shipments
arrived two weeks after they were sent. Please explain why
these deliveries were so late.
NOT GOOD.
POSSIBLE TOPIC SENTENCE:
• I am writing to express my concern with late
deliveries by your courier.
PRACTICE:
Evaluate topic sentences

22. 2. Innovations in development of tools to carry out district
situation analysis of HIV/AIDS have provided a real
opportunity to states to programme at the district level.
Twenty-seven districts are progressing well, developing
comprehensive prevention treatment and care plans. They
are taking action to strengthen service delivery mechanisms
of the four key strategies for children and AIDS. More
supervision and monitoring are required to ensure that
actions are streamlined and have synergistic outcomes.
• NOT GOOD. The sentence gives readers the impression it
will talk about innovations in tools. The paragraph
discusses progress made by various districts.

23. EFFECTIVE WRITING PRACTICE
Write a paragraph with a topic sentence
Include info on the next slide.
Topic sentence conveying main message
Present info in a coherent order.

24. EFFECTIVE WRITING PRACTICE
MAIN MESSAGE: Deaths by diarrhea dehydration are
unnecessary & easily preventable through the use of oral
rehydration therapy.
POINTS: Each year, more than 4 million young children die of
diarrhea dehydration Deaths can be prevented ORT is oral
rehydration therapy Revolutionary, low-cost Made of water,
sugar, salt Easy for parents to prepare 1984: ORT saved ½
million kids 38 countries have begun large scale production
Over the next 5 years, ORT is planned to reach ½ of the
world’s families Can save 2 million kids every year

25. Sample Text:
Each year, more than four million young children die of
diarrhea dehydration. These deaths need not have occurred.
A revolutionary, low-cost technique, called oral rehydration
therapy (ORT) could probably have saved their lives. ORT,
simply a drink of water, sugar and salt, costs practically
nothing, and is simple enough for any parent to prepare. In
1984, about half a million children were saved by this
revolutionary technique. Today, 38 nations have begun a
large-scale production of oral rehydration salts. Over the next
five years, ORT could spread to half the world’s families,
saving the lives of some two million children each year.

26. A closer look atyourwriting
Organization
Clear topic sentences
• HOW to improve
PARAGRAPH ANALYSIS

27. VERB-BASED writing uses Vs to govern the
action of the sentence
GOAL: use verb-based writing
Verbs enliven, convey action & engage the reader

28. Common to a bureaucratic style that can be long-winded &
tiresome to read.
There is no direct action in noun-based writing; nothing
seems to happen. Noun-based constructions also tend to use
more words.
NOUNS
NOUN-BASED writing

30. LANHAM QUICKLY DISTINGUISHES A V FROM A N STYLE.
I came. I saw. I conquered.
Arrival; Reconnaissance; Victory.
LANHAM QUOTES, AS AN EXAMPLE N STYLE:
The connection between behaviour in the socially real
world and dramatic performance is a double link. Much of
everyday social behavior and socially consequential action
is itself composed, and often in a fashion which is
recognised at the time as ‘theatrical’ or is revealed as such
afterwards.
m
THIS KIND OF WRITING IS GRAMMATICALLY CORRECT, BUT DULL

31. Nora Bacon, in The Well-Crafted Sentence, gives this
example, complaining of its long, abstract subject:
Another reason that the U.S. invasion of Iraq was a
mistake is that it caused the stature of the United States as
a world leader to plummet.
She corrects it to:
Furthermore, when the United States invaded Iraq, its
stature as a world leader plummeted.
It’sshorterandeasierforreaderstodetermine whatthe
sentenceisabout(“whentheUnited Statesinvaded”).

32. The project officer decided to review the operations.
The project officer made a decision to conduct a review of the
operations.
NOUN-BASED writing
VERB-BASED writing

33. NO
PRACTICE: Rewrite the noun-based paragraph
using more action-oriented writing. Notice the
difference in readability.

34. Four teams from the state office conducted a visit of
the areas worst affected by the floods and completed an
assessment in six affected districts. The teams made the
observation that the government teams are not of
sufficient capacity and there is availability of adequate
materials in affected areas. There is a potentially
dangerous situation for epidemics as a result of the
stagnant water, and the extent of damage to health
infrastructure will gain clarity once there is a decrease in
the water levels.

35. Four teams from the state office visited the areas
worst affected by the floods and assessed six affected
districts. The teams observed that the government has
sufficient teams and that adequate materials are
available in affected areas. The stagnant water poses a
potentially dangerous situation for epidemics and we
will know the extent of damage to health infrastructure
once the water recedes.
84 vs. 62 words

36. NOPRACTICE 2: Revise noun-based phrases
• In each case, the noun-based phrase can be replaced
by a single verb.
• Which verb would you use?

37. 1. Make a realization that
2. Make a recommendation that
3. Effect a reduction in
4. Exhibit a tendency to
5. Make a decision
6. Take a decision
7. Reach a conclusion about
8. Make an examination of
9. Place an order for
10. To be cognizant of
11. Conduct an analysis of
Realize
Recommended that
Reduce
Tend
Decide
Decide
Conclude
Examine
Order
Know
Analyze

38. NOPRACTICE 3: Identify noun-based phrases in a ¶
• Improve these 5 sentences by using verbs, rather than
nouns, to convey the important concepts.
• Notice the length of verb-based sentences.

39. 1. When we made the realization that the manager was not
able to attend, we made a decision to cancel the meeting.
When we realized the manager was not able to attend, we
cancelled the meeting.
2. We gave consideration to the idea of the budget
modification, but finally we came to the conclusion that it
was best left as it was.
We considered changing the budget, but we finally
decided not to.
3. The change in government brought an end to the program.
The program ended when the government changed.

40. 4. I will perform an analysis of the situation.
I will analyze the situation
5. Consistent with its mandate for advocacy and
collaboration WHO has had involvement with other
organizations in the mobilization of the increased
resources needed to respond to the situation.
WHO, consistent with its mandate, has advocated for
increased resources and collaborated with other
organizations to respond to the situation.

41. How many of the 6
paragraph patterns
can you
remember?

42. 1. Chronology Classification &
Listing
3.
4.
Compare &
Contrast
5.
Q&A
CAUSE &
EFFECT
6.
1st, 2nd, 3rd
before, after
when, later
First / second / third
Finally / also
For example, for instance
in other words
Although,but,
whereas,
however,
meanwhile,
similarly,
inthesame
way
Consequently, for
this reason, since
Because (of),
therefore, as a
result (of)

43. TOPIC SENTENCES
• Holds THE ¶’S MAIN message
• GOOD readers look for topic
sentence to get general
meaning quickly
• Clear / well-placed topic
sentences makes text MORE
ACCESSIBLE

44. ANALYZE YOUR WRITING
Organization
Clear topic sentences
• HOW to improve
PARAGRAPH ANALYSIS

45. VERB-BASED writing uses Vs to govern the
action of the sentence
GOAL: use verb-based writing
Verbs enliven, convey action & engage the reader

46. NOUNS VERB
S
VS.

47. Practice Writing & Analysis