Brainstorm Paragraph Organization

I write entirely to find out what
I'm thinking, what I'm looking at,
what I see and what it means.
What I want and what I fear.
Grammar is a piano I play by ear.
WRITING Joan Didion /novelist & essayist

PART I
What To Write?
Getting Your Brain In Gear
How To Begin
What To Say
How To Say it
Problems that plague all writers

• Frustration is high at the beginning of the
process
• Task is seemingly daunting
• TECHNIQUES TO GET OVER THOSE EARLY
HURDLES
• Brainstorming
• Mental self-inventory
DEER-IN- THE-HEADLIGHTS
It’s wise to think & plan before beginning to write.

SUGGESTIONS
• Know Your Audience
• Writing Style
• Narrow Down The Topic / Focus Your
Thoughts
• Too Early To Pinpoint Point Of View
PRELIMS
It’s wise to think & plan before beginning to write.

• Time Limit
• Jot Down Ideas / No Editing, Polishing
Whatever Comes To You (Words / Phrases /
Questions)
• Activate Your Energy
• Evaluate Ideas / Cross Out Unworkable Ones
• Add Any Related Or Additional Ones
• Choose Topic From Ideas
BRAINSTORMING

• Personal brainstorming can include questions as
well as more fully formed ideas about a topic.
• The questions are often most useful in a personal
brainstorm; they trigger ideas for specific topics.
• There are no rights or wrongs in brainstorming.
• The intent of the exercise is to get your mind in gear
& working.
NOTE

1. Big issue in politics—is it Democrats or Republicans who
will fix it more?
2. Future generations will suffer. How fast is it happening?
3. Polar bears are dying out because of ice caps melting
4. What about other animals? Seals, sharks, dolphins?
5. Fumes from cars are causing earth to heat up
6. Factories—are they the cause of it? What about little
countries like Peru?
BRAINSTORMING / Global Warming

7. How much is due to China being so important nowadays?
8. Last summer was hottest summer we've had—even my
uncle's corn crop got ruined
9. Atmosphere has a hole in it. (I don't really know what this
means)
10. My dad's complaint about his fishing being affected . . . no
more salmon in the river
11. Define global anyway. What does it really mean? Is the
weather only world feature changing? Is the soil drying up?
What about the oceans?
Effects Of Global Warming On Polar Bears

• Take 5 min. & do a personal brainstorm for an essay
on a topic from one of your classes or the news.
• After you have completed your brainstorm, write
out the topic, its audience, point of view, and style
for your imagined essay.
BRAINSTORMING Practice
WRITING PART II

Vigorous writing is concise. A
sentence should contain no
unnecessary words, a paragraph no
unnecessary sentences, for the
same reason that a drawing should
have no unnecessary lines and a
machine no unnecessary parts.
This requires not that the writer
make all sentences short or avoid all
detail and treat subjects only in
outline, but that every word tell.
Wm. Strunk Jr.
1
8
6
9
-
1
9
4
6

Getting Off To A Good Start - 1st ¶
So let's begin.
Ready?
We’ll start writing our 1st ¶. That’s
just the beginning of the 1st draft of
our text.

Starting The First Draft
• All writing begins with a 1st draft.
• To draft means to write first & subsequent versions of
what will become your finished writing.
• Drafting followed by revising should be your practice.
• Rare is the writer who can produce a polished finished
piece of writing in the first draft.
Why bother? What’s the purpose?

• PURPOSE of the 1st draft, of which the 1st ¶ is the
beginning, is to get your ideas down on paper so
that you can go back & revise, expand, & polish
them up into a finished essay.
• Think of the rough draft as a framework
/simplified structure built out of the ideas you
developed during your planning and outlining work.
The First Draft

IDEAS must be ORGANIZED
¶s are the BUILDING BLOCKS

Paragraphs - role
• support the essay’s thesis
statement
• provide additional ideas that
contribute to the thesis
statement
• indicate shifts in subject
matter, time
• provide rest for the reader's
eyes, a chance to breathe
TIPCOMING UP

• Be sure to vary the length of your paragraphs.
• A series of very short paragraphs feels choppy
/disconnected; it indicates a poorly developed
thesis.
• Extremely long paragraphs make reading difficult—
they seem to take the reader's breath away.
• Used carefully, one-sentence paragraphs can make
a dramatic impact, but DO NOT overuse this
strategy.

Veryengaging.
Grabthereader'sattentionandkeepitthroughout.
The Importance Of The 1st ¶
ESSAY STRUCTURE
Generally - INTRODUCTION, BODY, AND CONCLUSION
Usually the thesis statement’s in the 1st ¶ (not a strict rule)
The 1st ¶ can set the scene / introduce the problem
What's much more important than stating the thesis in the 1st
¶ is making sure that it’s lively & grabs the reader's attention.

Writing the 1st ¶
In trouble?
Skip the 1st ¶.
Start with the 2nd & 3rd ¶s.
Once warmed up & clipping
along, go back & write the
1st ¶ in your 2nd draft.

What makes a GOOD paragraph
• It has a topic sentence
presenting the ¶’s main idea.
• Doesn’t necessarily come at the
beginning of the ¶.
• Like the essay's thesis
statement, the topic sentence
can appear at the end of a ¶, as
a kind of punctuation mark.
That’s a good
question!

What makes a GOOD paragraph
UNIFIED—All of the sentences in a single ¶ should be related
to a single controlling idea (usu. in the topic sentence of the ¶).
CLEARLY RELATED TO THE THESIS—The sentences should all
refer to the central idea, or thesis, of the paper
COHERENT—The sentences should be arranged in a logical
manner and should follow a definite plan for development
WELL-DEVELOPED—Every idea discussed in the ¶ should be
adequately explained and supported through evidence and
details that work together to explain the ¶’s controlling idea

T
I
P
Each Paragraph Must
Have:
1. A topic sentence
2. Development of the topic
3. Logical flow throughout

HOW TO BE STRONG∧
A
∧
PARAGRAPH
3 Steps

Step 1
Write a
Good
Topic
Sentence
A topic sentence
needs to hook
readers.
Must be strong /
significant.
It doesn’t simply
hint at or take
dainty steps
around the topic.

• Be Coherent
• Develop the idea
Support the Topic Sentence
Step 2

ELEMENTS: details, adjectives logical time-sequence
connections, sentence connectors, examples
SMOOTH & LOGICAL flow within paragraphs
EACH SENTENCE connects to the one before & after it
Step 3

In Pursuit Of Thinness
¶1
Throughout history and through a cross-section of cultures,
women have transformed their appearance to conform to a
beauty ideal. Ancient Chinese aristocrats bound their feet as a
show of femininity; American and European women in the
1800s cinched in their waists so tightly, some suffered internal
damage; in some African cultures women continue to wear
plates in their lower lips, continually stretching the skin to
receive plates of larger size.

¶2 The North American ideal of beauty has continually focused
on women's bodies: the tiny waist of the Victorian period, the
boyish figure in vogue during the flapper era, and the
voluptuous curves that were the measure of beauty between
the 1930s and 1950s. Current standards emphasize a toned,
slender look, one that exudes fitness, youth, and health.
According to psychologist Eva Szekely, "Having to be attractive at
this time . . . means unequivocally having to be thin. In North
America today, thinness is a precondition for being perceived by
others and oneself as healthy.” However, this relentless pursuit
of thinness is not just an example of women trying to look their
best, it is also a struggle for control, acceptance and success.

Last¶
Perhaps a woman's ability to control her own body size and
weight can be seen as a metaphor, a substitution for control
that may be lacking in other areas of her life. While women
continue to struggle for equality on an economic scale and
within their relationships, they still maintain control over their
own bodies. It is important that women begin to accept
themselves for who they are, regardless of their body type,
and to feel comfortable with the body they live in. If women
continue to pursue the "elusive, eternally youthful body
beautiful” they'll only be setting themselves up for failure.

Complete Essay
In the APPENDIX
Could we
see more
about
organizing
paragraphs
?

Organizing ¶s – Another Angle
There are many different ways to organize a ¶.
Which you choose depends on the ¶’s controlling idea.
Let’s look
at a few

1. NARRATION: Tell a story chronologically.
2. DESCRIPTION: Give specific details / what s.t.
looks, smells, tastes, sounds, or feels like. Organize
spatially, in order of appearance, or by topic.
3. PROCESS: Explain how something works, step by
step.
4. CLASSIFICATION: Separate into groups or
explain the various parts of a topic.
5. ILLUSTRATION: Give examples & and explain
how they prove your point.

5-step ¶ Writing / Organiziation
1. Decide on a controlling idea & create a topic
sentence
2. Explain the controlling idea
3. Give an example/s
4. Explain the example/s
5. Complete the ¶’s idea /transition into the
next ¶

5-STEP PROCESS TO BUILDING
A ¶
Using Illustration
Each step includes an explanation of the step &
a bit of “model” text to illustrate how it works.
The finished model paragraph will be about
slave spirituals, the original songs that African
Americans created during slavery.

1. Decide on a controlling idea & create a topic sentence
¶ development begins with creating the controlling idea.
This idea directs the ¶‘s
development. The
controlling idea is often
the topic sentence.
May need more than 1
sentence for a ¶‘s
controlling idea.

1. Decide on controlling idea / create a topic sentence
The controlling idea for our “model¶,” in a topic sentence:
Slave spirituals
often had hidden
double meanings.
That’s the
controlling idea &
topic sentence!

2. Explain the controlling idea
• FURTHER DEVELOP ¶ using
reasons/explanation for how info in topic
sentence is to be interpreted
• EXPLAIN thoughts about the main topic,
idea or focus of the ¶

On one level, spirituals referenced heaven,
Jesus, and the soul; but on another level, the
songs spoke about slave resistance.
2. This sentence would follow the
controlling idea about slave spirituals:
This is the rationale or explanation of how the
topic sentence info is to be interpreted.

3. Give an example/s Further develop ¶ by
using some type of
support / evidence for the
idea & the explanation
that came before it.
The example serves as a
sign or representation of
the relationship
established in the idea &
explanation portions of
the ¶.

Here’s 1 of 2 examples to
illustrate the double meanings
in slave spirituals:
A)For example,accordingto
FrederickDouglass,thesong“O
Canaan,SweetCanaan”spoke
ofslaves’longingforheaven,
but it also expressed their
desiretoescapetotheNorth.
Carefullistenersheardthis
second meaning in the
followinglyrics:“Idon’texpect
tostay/Muchlongerhere./
RuntoJesus,shunthedanger./
Idon’t expect to stay.”

Here’s the 2nd example
illustrating the double meanings
in slave spirituals:
B) Slavesevenused
songs like“StealAway
toJesus(atmidnight)”
toannounce toother
slaves thetimeand
place ofsecret,
forbidden meetings.

FURTHER ¶ DEVELOPMENT
Next is an explanation of each example & its
relevance to the topic sentence & rationale
(stated at the beginning of the ¶). It explains
why you chose to use this/or these particular
examples as evidence to support the major
claim, or focus, in your ¶.
4. Explain the example(s)

4. Explain the example(s)
Continue pattern of giving & explaining examples until
all points/examples have been made / explained.
NONE should be left unexplained.
Might be able to explain relationship between the
example & the topic sentence in the same sentence
which introduced the example.
More often, however, you will need to explain that
relationship in a separate sentence.

• 4. Look at these explanations for the 2
examples in the slave spirituals ¶:
A) When slaves sang this song, they could have been
speaking of their departure from this life and their arrival
in heaven; however, they also could have been describing
their plans to leave the South and run, not to Jesus, but to
the North.
B) [The relationship between example B and the main
idea of the paragraph's controlling idea is clear enough
without adding another sentence to explain it.]

5. Complete the ¶’s idea/transition into the next ¶
The last step in ¶development
is tying up the ¶’s loose ends &
reminding readers of the
relevance of the info in this ¶to
the main or controlling idea of
the paper.
Might, however, simply
transition into the next
development in the next
paragraph.

5. Complete the ¶’s idea/transition into the next ¶
Here’s an example of a
sentence that completes the
slave spirituals paragraph:
What whites heard asmerely
spiritualsongs,slavesdiscerned
as detailed messages. The
hidden meanings inspirituals
allowed slaves to sing what
they could not say.
This sentence completes the
paragraph.

REMEMBER STEPS 4 & 5?
Giving & Explaining Examples
You see they can
be repeated as
often as needed.
The idea is to keep
using the pattern till
the main idea of the
paragraph is
completed.
The key is to use it!
How about reviewing
those steps?

Slave spirituals often had hidden double meanings. On one
level, spirituals referenced heaven, Jesus, & the soul, but on
another level, the songs spoke about slave resistance.For
example, according to Frederick Douglass, the song “O Canaan,
Sweet Canaan” spoke of slaves’longing for heaven, but it also
expressed their desire to escape to the North. Careful listeners
heard this 2nd meaning in the following lyrics: “I don’t expect to
stay / Much longer here. / Run to Jesus, shun the danger. / I don’t
expect to stay.” When slaves sang this song, they could have
been speaking of their departure from this life & their arrival in
heaven; however, they also could have been describing their
plans to leave the South and run, not to Jesus, but to the North.

Let’s put theory into practice.
Each sample ¶ has a problem.
Identify it and revise the ¶.
Is there a doctor in the house?
DIAGNOSING ¶s

DIAGNOSIS:
DIAGNOSING PARAGRAPHS
No Topic Sentence
Piranhas rarely feed on large animals; they eat
smaller fish and aquatic plants. When confronted with
humans, piranhas’ first instinct is to flee, not attack.
Their fear of humans makes sense. Far more piranhas
are eaten by people than people are eaten by
piranhas. If the fish are well-fed, they won’t bite
humans.

REVISION with TOPIC SENTENCE
Although most people consider piranhas to be quite
dangerous, they are, for the most part, entirely
harmless. Piranhas rarely feed on large animals; they eat
are eaten by people than people are eaten by piranhas.
If the fish are well-fed, they won’t bite humans.

REAL CONTENT
¶’s 1st Sentence
¶’s Last Sentence
Explains the ¶’s Topic (Controlling Idea)
Explains how the ¶ relates to the broader argument
Includes all evidence to make the point

dangerous, they are, for the most part, entirely
harmless. Piranhas rarely feed on large animals; they eat
are eaten by people than people are eaten by piranhas.
If the fish are well-fed, they won’t bite humans.
NOTICE how a topic sentence expressing the controlling idea
tells readers the point of all the evidence.

Variation of Piranha ¶ / topic sent. not at
beginning
Let’s start the ¶ with a transition sentence to remind
readers what happened in the previous ¶, which was
After mastering them, try using them in the middle or the end
of a ¶ instead of at the beginning.
Readers must know the main idea of the ¶ & its relation to
the thesis.
TOPIC SENTENCE PLACEMENT

Variation of Piranha ¶ / topic sent. not at
beginningLikesharks,snakes,andspiders,pirahnas arewidelyfeared.
Althoughmostpeopleconsiderpiranhastobequite
dangerous,theyare,forthemostpart,entirelyharmless.
Piranhas rarelyfeedonlargeanimals;theyeatsmallerfish
andaquaticplants.Whenconfrontedwithhumans,
piranhas’ firstinstinctistoflee,notattack.Theirfearof
humansmakessense.Farmorepiranhas areeatenbypeople
thanpeopleareeatenbypiranhas.Ifthefisharewell-fed,
theywon’tbitehumans.

DIAGNOSE this ¶
No Topic Sentence
Although most people consider piranhas to be quite dangerous,
they are, for the most part, entirely harmless. Piranhas rarely
feed on large animals; they eat smaller fish and aquatic plants.
When confronted with humans, piranhas’ first instinct is to
flee, not attack. Their fear of humans makes sense. Far more
piranhas are eaten by people than people are eaten by
piranhas. A number of South American groups eat piranhas.
They fry or grill the fish and then serve them with coconut milk
or tucupi, a sauce made from fermented manioc juices.
DIAGNOSIS:More than 1 controlling ide

No Topic Sentence
They fry or grill the fish and then serve them with coconut
milk or tucupi, a sauce made from fermented manioc juices.
DIAGNOSIS:More than 1 controlling ide

No Topic Sentence
They fry or grill the fish and then serve them with coconut
milk or tucupi, a sauce made from fermented manioc juices.
REVISE IT

No Topic Sentence
Consider eliminating sentences that relate to 2nd
idea, or split the ¶ into 2 or more ¶s, each with
only 1main idea.
In the last text, the final 2 sentences branch off
into a different topic; so, the revised paragraph
would eliminate them & conclude with a sentence
that reminds the reader of the ¶’s main idea.
REVISION / more than 1 controlling
idea

No Topic Sentence
dangerous, they are, for the most part, entirely harmless.
Piranhas rarely feed on large animals; they eat smaller
fish and aquatic plants. When confronted with humans,
piranhas’ first instinct is to flee, not attack. Their fear of
humans makes sense. Far more piranhas are eaten by
people than people are eaten by piranhas. If the fish
are well-fed, they won’t bite humans.
REVISION

No Topic Sentence
they are entirelyharmless. Piranhas rarelyfeed on largeanimals;
they eatsmallerfish and aquatic plants. When confrontedwith
humans, piranhas’ instinct is to flee,not attack. But a piranha bite is
likelywhen a frightenedpiranha is liftedout of the water—for
example,if it has been caughtin a fishing net or when the water
levelin pools where piranhas are living falls too low. A largenumber
of fish maybe trapped in a single pool, & if they arehungry, they
may attackanything that enters the water.
DIAGNOSE this ¶
DIAGNOSIS: Lacks Transition…/

No Topic Sentence
Althoughmostpeopleconsiderpiranhastobequitedangerous,they
are,exceptintwomainsituations,entirelyharmless.Piranhasrarely
feedonlargeanimals;theyeatsmallerfishandaquaticplants.When
confrontedwithhumans,piranhas’instinctistoflee,notattack.But
therearetwosituationsinwhichapiranhabiteislikely.Thefirstis
whenafrightenedpiranhaisliftedoutofthewater—forexample,ifit
hasbeencaughtinafishingnet.Thesecondiswhenthewaterlevelin
poolswherepiranhasarelivingfallstoolow.Alargenumberoffish
maybetrappedinasinglepool,andiftheyarehungry,theymayattack
anythingthatentersthewater.
The 1st & the 2nd – Help To Organize

No Topic Sentence
APPENDIX
Paragraph Samples Using:
1. Narration
2. Description
3. Process
4. Classification
Additional Material on Transitions

THESIS STATEMENT- There is no thesis at all. / The thesis is
too general, or a truism.
The thesis is too narrow.
ORGANIZATION - No sense of direction, no reason why one
paragraph follows another. / Few, or inadequate transitions. /
Too many generalizations, & too little support for them. /
Weak introduction or conclusion, or one simply repeats the
other.
GENERAL - Misspelled words. / Careless grammar mistakes.
Common Essay Errors:

• www.education.com/study-help/article/brainstorming-
discover/adapted
• www.education.com/study-help/article/paragraph/adapted
• writingcenter.unc.edu/handouts/paragraphs/adapted
• web.uvic.ca/wguide/Pages/SampleEssaysExpos.html
• http://web.uvic.ca/wguide/Pages/EssaysCommonProbs.ht
ml adapted
Sources:

Brainstorm Paragraph Organization

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