Stress Management; What Does Stress Do; How Can Stress Management Counseling Help; Coping with Stress; Stress Management Strategy (SMS); How Can Avoid Stress; Stress Management Techniques; Proven Tips for Stress Relief Healthy Thinking; Automatic Thoughts and Cognitive; Distortions; You Are What You Think; Irrational Thoughts; Irrational Beliefs; Time Management; How to Manage Time; Tools for Time Management Counseling; Tips to Improve Time Management Skills; Benefits of Time Management; Stress and Time Management Myths

1. Stress ManagementStress Management
and Relaxationand Relaxation
Syed Md. Sajjad Kabir
Department of Psychology
University of Chittagong
Book Reference: Kabir, SMS (2017).
Essentials of Counseling. Abosar
Prokashana Sangstha, Banglabazar,
Dhaka-1100 ISBN: 978-984-8798-22-5,
Dkaka - 1100; smskabir@psy.jnu.ac.bd;

2. Stress ManagementStress Management
• Stress is a natural part of the human experience.Stress is a natural part of the human experience.
• Stress can provide motivation and increase ourStress can provide motivation and increase our
performance.performance.
• Excessive levels of stress, left unchecked, can alsoExcessive levels of stress, left unchecked, can also
result in symptoms of physical and mental illness.result in symptoms of physical and mental illness.
• Psychological stress is known to suppress thePsychological stress is known to suppress the
immune system, making us more susceptible toimmune system, making us more susceptible to
illness.illness.
• Stress is also associated with hypertension, heartStress is also associated with hypertension, heart
disease, headaches, and cancer. Prolonged stressdisease, headaches, and cancer. Prolonged stress
can also trigger depression, anxiety, and othercan also trigger depression, anxiety, and other
psychological symptoms. psychological symptoms.
Book Reference: Kabir, SMS (2017). Essentials of
Counseling. Abosar Prokashana Sangstha, Banglabazar,
Dhaka-1100 ISBN: 978-984-8798-22-5, Dkaka - 1100;
smskabir@psy.jnu.ac.bd; smskabir218@gmail.com

3. Unhealthy ways of copingUnhealthy ways of coping
with stresswith stress
• SmokingSmoking
• Drinking too muchDrinking too much
• Overeating or undereatingOvereating or undereating
• Zoning out for hours inZoning out for hours in
front of the TV orfront of the TV or
computercomputer
• Withdrawing from friends,Withdrawing from friends,
family, and activitiesfamily, and activities
• Using pills or drugs toUsing pills or drugs to
relaxrelax
• Sleeping too muchSleeping too much
• ProcrastinatingProcrastinating
• Filling up every minute ofFilling up every minute of
the day to avoid facingthe day to avoid facing
problemsproblems
• Taking out your stress onTaking out your stress on
others (lashing out, angryothers (lashing out, angry
outbursts, physicaloutbursts, physical
violence)violence)
These coping strategies may temporarily reduceThese coping strategies may temporarily reduce
stress, but they cause more damage in the long run:stress, but they cause more damage in the long run:

4. Learning healthier waysLearning healthier ways
to manage stressto manage stress
Dealing with Stressful Situations: The Four A’sDealing with Stressful Situations: The Four A’s
Change the situationChange the situation
•
Avoid the stressor.Avoid the stressor.
•
Alter the stressor.Alter the stressor.
Change your reactionChange your reaction
•
Adapt to the stressor.Adapt to the stressor.
•
Accept the stressor.Accept the stressor.

5. Stress management strategy #1Stress management strategy #1
Avoid unnecessary stressAvoid unnecessary stress
• Learn how to say “no”Learn how to say “no”
• Avoid people who stress you outAvoid people who stress you out
• Take control of yourTake control of your
environmentenvironment
• Avoid hot-button topicsAvoid hot-button topics
• Pare down your to-do listPare down your to-do list

6. Stress management strategy #2Stress management strategy #2
Alter the situationAlter the situation
• Express your feelings insteadExpress your feelings instead
of bottling them up.of bottling them up.
• Be willing to compromise.Be willing to compromise.
• Be more assertive.Be more assertive.
• Manage your time better.Manage your time better.
Book Reference: Kabir, SMS (2017). Essentials of Counseling. Abosar
Prokashana Sangstha, Banglabazar, Dhaka-1100 ISBN: 978-984-8798-
22-5, Dkaka - 1100; smskabir@psy.jnu.ac.bd; smskabir218@gmail.com

7. Stress management strategy #3
Adapt to the stressor
•Reframe problems.Reframe problems.
•Look at the big picture.Look at the big picture.
•Adjust your standards.Adjust your standards.
•Focus on the positive.Focus on the positive.

8. Stress management strategy #4Stress management strategy #4
Accept the things you can’t changeAccept the things you can’t change
•Don’t try to control theDon’t try to control the
uncontrollable.uncontrollable.
•Look for the upside.Look for the upside.
•Share your feelings.Share your feelings.
•Learn to forgive.Learn to forgive.

9. Stress management strategy #5
Make time for fun and relaxation
• Set aside relaxation time.Set aside relaxation time.
• Connect with others.Connect with others.
• Do something you enjoyDo something you enjoy
every day.every day.
• Keep your sense of humor.Keep your sense of humor.

10. Healthy ways to relax and rechargeHealthy ways to relax and recharge
•
Go for a walk.Go for a walk.
•
Spend time in nature.Spend time in nature.
•
Call a good friend.Call a good friend.
•
Sweat out tensionSweat out tension
with a good workout.with a good workout.
•
Write in yourWrite in your
journal.journal.
•
Take a long bath.Take a long bath.
•
Light scented candles.Light scented candles.
•
Savor a warm cup ofSavor a warm cup of
coffee or tea.coffee or tea.
•
Play with a pet.Play with a pet.
•
Work in your garden.Work in your garden.
•
Get a massage.Get a massage.
•
Curl up with a goodCurl up with a good
book.book.
•
Listen to music.Listen to music.
•
Watch a comedy.Watch a comedy.

11. Stress management strategy #6Stress management strategy #6
Adopt a healthy lifestyleAdopt a healthy lifestyle
•Exercise regularly.Exercise regularly.
•Eat a healthy diet.Eat a healthy diet.
•Reduce caffeine and sugar.Reduce caffeine and sugar.
•Avoid alcohol, cigarettes, andAvoid alcohol, cigarettes, and
drugs.drugs.
•Get enough sleep.Get enough sleep.
Book Reference: Kabir, SMS (2017). Essentials of Counseling.
Abosar Prokashana Sangstha, Banglabazar, Dhaka-1100 ISBN:
978-984-8798-22-5, Dkaka - 1100; smskabir@psy.jnu.ac.bd;
smskabir218@gmail.com

12. What can you do about stress?What can you do about stress?
•Find out what is causing stressFind out what is causing stress
in your life.in your life.
•Look for ways to reduce theLook for ways to reduce the
amount of stress in your life.amount of stress in your life.
•Learn healthy ways to relieveLearn healthy ways to relieve
stress or reduce its harmfulstress or reduce its harmful
effects.effects.

13. How do you measure your stress level?How do you measure your stress level?
• Sometimes it is clear where stress is coming from.Sometimes it is clear where stress is coming from.
You can count on stress during a major life changeYou can count on stress during a major life change
such as the death of a loved one, getting married,such as the death of a loved one, getting married,
or having a baby. But other times it may not be soor having a baby. But other times it may not be so
clear why you feel stressed.clear why you feel stressed.
• It's important to figure out what causes stress forIt's important to figure out what causes stress for
you. Everyone feels and responds to stressyou. Everyone feels and responds to stress
differently. Keeping a stress journal may help. Getdifferently. Keeping a stress journal may help. Get
a notebook, and write down when something makesa notebook, and write down when something makes
you feel stressed. Then write how you reacted andyou feel stressed. Then write how you reacted and
what you did to deal with the stress. Keeping awhat you did to deal with the stress. Keeping a
stress journal can help you find out what is causingstress journal can help you find out what is causing
your stress and how much stress you feel. Then youyour stress and how much stress you feel. Then you
can take steps to reduce the stress or handle itcan take steps to reduce the stress or handle it
better.better.

14. How can you avoid stress?How can you avoid stress?
Stress is a fact of life for most people. You mayStress is a fact of life for most people. You may
not be able to get rid of stress, but you can looknot be able to get rid of stress, but you can look
for ways to lower it.for ways to lower it.
You might try some of these ideas:You might try some of these ideas:
•Learn better ways to manage your time.Learn better ways to manage your time.
•Find better ways to cope.Find better ways to cope.
•Take good care of yourself.Take good care of yourself.
•Try out new ways of thinking.Try out new ways of thinking.
•Speak up.Speak up.
•Ask for help.Ask for help.
Sometimes stress is just too much to handle alone.Sometimes stress is just too much to handle alone.
Talking to a friend or family member may help, butTalking to a friend or family member may help, but
you may also want to see a counselor.you may also want to see a counselor.

15. How can you relieve stress?How can you relieve stress?
You will feel better if you can find ways to get stress outYou will feel better if you can find ways to get stress out
of your system. The best ways to relieve stress areof your system. The best ways to relieve stress are
different for each person. Try some of these ideas todifferent for each person. Try some of these ideas to
see which ones work for you:see which ones work for you:
•ExerciseExercise. Regular exercise is one of the best ways to manage. Regular exercise is one of the best ways to manage
stress. Walking is a great way to get started.stress. Walking is a great way to get started.
•Write. It can help to write about the things that are botheringWrite. It can help to write about the things that are bothering
you.you.
•Let your feelings outLet your feelings out. Talk, laugh, cry, and express anger when. Talk, laugh, cry, and express anger when
you need to with someone you trust.you need to with someone you trust.
•Do something you enjoyDo something you enjoy. A hobby can help you relax. Volunteer. A hobby can help you relax. Volunteer
work or work that helps others can be a great stress reliever.work or work that helps others can be a great stress reliever.
•Learn ways to relax your bodyLearn ways to relax your body. This can include breathing. This can include breathing
exercises, muscle relaxation exercises, massage, aromatherapy,exercises, muscle relaxation exercises, massage, aromatherapy,
yoga, or relaxing exercises.yoga, or relaxing exercises.
•Focus on the presentFocus on the present. Try meditation, imagery exercises, or. Try meditation, imagery exercises, or
self-hypnosis. Listen to relaxing music. Try to look for theself-hypnosis. Listen to relaxing music. Try to look for the
humor in life. Laughter really can be the best medicine.humor in life. Laughter really can be the best medicine.

16. Healthy ThinkingHealthy Thinking
For more information on challengingFor more information on challenging
your thoughts, see -your thoughts, see -
• Learning about Automatic ThoughtsLearning about Automatic Thoughts
and Cognitive Distortionsand Cognitive Distortions
• You Are What You ThinkYou Are What You Think
• Common Irrational ThoughtsCommon Irrational Thoughts
• Handling Irrational BeliefsHandling Irrational Beliefs
Book Reference: Kabir, SMS (2017).
Essentials of Counseling. Abosar
Prokashana Sangstha, Banglabazar,
Dhaka-1100 ISBN: 978-984-8798-22-5,
Dkaka - 1100; smskabir@psy.jnu.ac.bd;

17. AA. Learning about Automatic. Learning about Automatic
Thoughts and Cognitive DistortionsThoughts and Cognitive Distortions
• OvergeneralizationOvergeneralization
• LabelingLabeling
• Mind ReadingMind Reading
• Fortune TellingFortune Telling
• Emotional ReasoningEmotional Reasoning
• ShouldingShoulding
• Personalization/BlamePersonalization/Blame
• All or NoneAll or None

18. B. You Are What You Think
Cognitive therapy is directed at 10 common cognitiveCognitive therapy is directed at 10 common cognitive
distortions, or faulty thought patterns, that send us intodistortions, or faulty thought patterns, that send us into
depression.depression.
See if you recognize yourself in any of these.See if you recognize yourself in any of these.
•All-or-Nothing ThinkingAll-or-Nothing Thinking
•OvergeneralizationOvergeneralization
•Mental FilterMental Filter
•Disqualifying the PositiveDisqualifying the Positive
•Jumping to ConclusionsJumping to Conclusions
•Magnification and MinimizationMagnification and Minimization
•Emotional ReasoningEmotional Reasoning
•Should StatementsShould Statements
•Labeling and MislabelingLabeling and Mislabeling
•PersonalizationPersonalization

19. C. Common Irrational Thoughts
Irrational Idea 1 - It is a dire necessity for an adult to be loved or approved byIrrational Idea 1 - It is a dire necessity for an adult to be loved or approved by
almost everyone for virtually everything he or she does.almost everyone for virtually everything he or she does.
Irrational Idea 2 - One should be thoroughly competent, adequate, and achievingIrrational Idea 2 - One should be thoroughly competent, adequate, and achieving
in all possible respects.in all possible respects.
Irrational Idea 3 - Certain people are bad, wicked, or villainous and they shouldIrrational Idea 3 - Certain people are bad, wicked, or villainous and they should
be severely blamed and punished for their sins.be severely blamed and punished for their sins.
Irrational Idea 4 - It is terrible, horrible, and catastrophic when things are notIrrational Idea 4 - It is terrible, horrible, and catastrophic when things are not
going the way one would like them to go.going the way one would like them to go.
Irrational Idea 5 - Human happiness is externally caused and people have little orIrrational Idea 5 - Human happiness is externally caused and people have little or
no ability to control their sorrows or rid themselves of their negative feelings.no ability to control their sorrows or rid themselves of their negative feelings.
Irrational Idea 6 - If something is or may be dangerous or fearsome, one shouldIrrational Idea 6 - If something is or may be dangerous or fearsome, one should
be terribly occupied with it and upset about it.be terribly occupied with it and upset about it.
Irrational Idea 7 - It is easier to avoid facing many life difficulties and self-Irrational Idea 7 - It is easier to avoid facing many life difficulties and self-
responsibilities than to undertake more rewarding forms of self-discipline.responsibilities than to undertake more rewarding forms of self-discipline.
Irrational Idea 8 - The past is all-important and because something once stronglyIrrational Idea 8 - The past is all-important and because something once strongly
affected one’s life, it should indefinitely do so.affected one’s life, it should indefinitely do so.
Irrational Idea 9 - People and things should be different from the way that theyIrrational Idea 9 - People and things should be different from the way that they
are, and it is catastrophic if perfect to the grim realities of life are notare, and it is catastrophic if perfect to the grim realities of life are not
immediately found.immediately found.
Irrational Idea 10 - Maximum human happiness can be achieved by inertia andIrrational Idea 10 - Maximum human happiness can be achieved by inertia and
inaction or by passively "enjoying oneself."inaction or by passively "enjoying oneself."

20. The six-step change model works for both workThe six-step change model works for both work
and personal life and is direct, straightforwardand personal life and is direct, straightforward
and results-oriented-and results-oriented-
•Step OneStep One: Gather Data: Gather Data
•Step TwoStep Two: Study the Data and Develop an: Study the Data and Develop an
Understanding of the ProblemUnderstanding of the Problem
•Step ThreeStep Three: Develop a Plan: Develop a Plan
•Step FourStep Four: Dispute your Problem Thinking: Dispute your Problem Thinking
•Step FiveStep Five: Replace Problem Thinking with New: Replace Problem Thinking with New
ThinkingThinking
•Step SixStep Six: Reinforce and Sustain New Thinking: Reinforce and Sustain New Thinking
Book Reference: Kabir, SMS (2017). Essentials of Counseling. Abosar
Prokashana Sangstha, Banglabazar, Dhaka-1100 ISBN: 978-984-8798-
22-5, Dkaka - 1100; smskabir@psy.jnu.ac.bd; smskabir218@gmail.com

21. ABC Change Model for Learning Optimism
““ABC” refers to how we react negatively to success or adversity,ABC” refers to how we react negatively to success or adversity,
while “DE” refers to how we can rethink the pessimistic reaction intowhile “DE” refers to how we can rethink the pessimistic reaction into
an optimistic one.an optimistic one.
The letters are defined as follows.The letters are defined as follows.
A (Adversity). Recognize when adversity hits. For die-hardA (Adversity). Recognize when adversity hits. For die-hard
pessimists, successes are a form of adversity; they say, “It won’tpessimists, successes are a form of adversity; they say, “It won’t
last”, “I was just lucky”, or “Too little, too late”.last”, “I was just lucky”, or “Too little, too late”.
B (Beliefs). Be aware of what you believe about the adversity.B (Beliefs). Be aware of what you believe about the adversity.
C (Consequences). Be aware of the emotional and other consequencesC (Consequences). Be aware of the emotional and other consequences
of your belief about that adversity.of your belief about that adversity.
D (Disputation). Question whether your beliefs are the onlyD (Disputation). Question whether your beliefs are the only
explanation.explanation.
E (Energization). Be aware of the new consequences (feelings,E (Energization). Be aware of the new consequences (feelings,
behaviors, actions) that do or could follow from a different, morebehaviors, actions) that do or could follow from a different, more
optimistic explanation or set of beliefs.optimistic explanation or set of beliefs.
..

22. D. What Are Irrational Beliefs?D. What Are Irrational Beliefs?
Irrational beliefs (negative)Irrational beliefs (negative) about selfabout self--
* I do not deserve positive attention from others.* I do not deserve positive attention from others.
* I should never burden others with my problems or fears.* I should never burden others with my problems or fears.
* I am junk.* I am junk.
* I am uncreative, nonproductive, ineffective and untalented.* I am uncreative, nonproductive, ineffective and untalented.
* I am worthless.* I am worthless.
* I am the worst example on earth of a person.* I am the worst example on earth of a person.
* I am powerless to solve my problems.* I am powerless to solve my problems.
* I have so many problems, I might as well give up right now.* I have so many problems, I might as well give up right now.
* I am so dumb about things, I can never solve anything as* I am so dumb about things, I can never solve anything as
complex as this.complex as this.
* I am the ugliest, most unattractive, unappealing, fat slob* I am the ugliest, most unattractive, unappealing, fat slob
in the world.in the world.

23. Irrational beliefs (negative)Irrational beliefs (negative) about othersabout others--
* No one cares about anyone else.* No one cares about anyone else.
* All men (or women) are dishonest and are never to be trusted.* All men (or women) are dishonest and are never to be trusted.
* Successful relationships are a trick; you have no control over how they turn out.* Successful relationships are a trick; you have no control over how they turn out.
* People are out to get whatever they can from you; you always end up being used.* People are out to get whatever they can from you; you always end up being used.
* People are so opinionated; they are never willing to listen to other's points of view.* People are so opinionated; they are never willing to listen to other's points of view.
* You are bound to get hurt in a relationship; it makes no difference how you try to change it.* You are bound to get hurt in a relationship; it makes no difference how you try to change it.
* There is a loser in every fight, so avoid fights at all costs.* There is a loser in every fight, so avoid fights at all costs.
* All people are out for number 1; you need to know you'll always be number 2, no matter what.* All people are out for number 1; you need to know you'll always be number 2, no matter what.
* It's not who you are but what you do that makes you attractive to another person.* It's not who you are but what you do that makes you attractive to another person.
* What counts in life is others' opinions of you.* What counts in life is others' opinions of you.
* There is a need to be on guard in dealing with others to insure that you don't get hurt.* There is a need to be on guard in dealing with others to insure that you don't get hurt.
Irrational beliefs on other topicsIrrational beliefs on other topics
* There is only one way of doing things.* There is only one way of doing things.
* Work is the punishment man must endure for being human.* Work is the punishment man must endure for being human.
* A family that plays (prays) together always stays together.* A family that plays (prays) together always stays together.
* Always protecting against the forces of evil in life is the only way to live.* Always protecting against the forces of evil in life is the only way to live.
* There are always two choices: right or wrong; black or white; win or lose; pass or fail; grow or* There are always two choices: right or wrong; black or white; win or lose; pass or fail; grow or
stagnate.stagnate.
* Once you are married and have children, you join the normal human race.* Once you are married and have children, you join the normal human race.
* A handicapped person is imperfect, to be pitied and to be dropped along the path of life.* A handicapped person is imperfect, to be pitied and to be dropped along the path of life.
* Admitting to a mistake or to failure is a sign of weakness.* Admitting to a mistake or to failure is a sign of weakness.
* The showing of any kind of emotion is wrong, a sign of weakness, and not allowable.* The showing of any kind of emotion is wrong, a sign of weakness, and not allowable.
* Asking for help from someone else is a way of admitting your weakness; it denies the reality that* Asking for help from someone else is a way of admitting your weakness; it denies the reality that
only you can solve your problems.only you can solve your problems.

24. Steps to Take in Refuting anSteps to Take in Refuting an
Irrational BeliefIrrational Belief
• Step 1: Is your thinking and problem solving ability being
blocked by an irrational belief?
• Step 2: If you have answered yes to any or all of the
questions in Step 1, you are probably facing a problem or
situation in which a blocking irrational belief is clouding your
thinking.
• Step 3: Once you have identified the blocking belief in Step
2, test its rationality. Answer the following questions about
the belief, "yes" or "no."
• Step 4: Once you have determined that the blocking belief
is irrational, you are ready to refute this irrational belief.
• Step 5: If you still have trouble solving problems, return to
Step 1 and begin again.

25. Stress ManagementStress Management
Relaxation ExercisesRelaxation Exercises
Relaxation Exercises: Precautions and WarningsRelaxation Exercises: Precautions and Warnings
• Do not practice relaxation exercises while driving a car, motorDo not practice relaxation exercises while driving a car, motor
vehicle or any other machineryvehicle or any other machinery
• If you have mental, physical and/or emotional limitations thenIf you have mental, physical and/or emotional limitations then
you should consult your physician or medical provider beforeyou should consult your physician or medical provider before
engaging in these relaxation exercises.engaging in these relaxation exercises.
Relaxation Exercises
• Guided ImageryGuided Imagery
• Progressive Muscle RelaxationProgressive Muscle Relaxation
• Deep BreathingDeep Breathing
• Relaxation MusicRelaxation Music

26. Benefits of Relaxation TechniquesBenefits of Relaxation Techniques
When faced with numerous responsibilities and tasks or the demands ofWhen faced with numerous responsibilities and tasks or the demands of
an illness, relaxation techniques may take a back seat in your life. Butan illness, relaxation techniques may take a back seat in your life. But
that means you might miss out on the health benefits of relaxation.that means you might miss out on the health benefits of relaxation.
Practicing relaxation techniques can reduce stress symptoms byPracticing relaxation techniques can reduce stress symptoms by
•Slowing your heart rateSlowing your heart rate
•Lowering blood pressureLowering blood pressure
•Slowing your breathing rateSlowing your breathing rate
•Increasing blood flow to major musclesIncreasing blood flow to major muscles
•Reducing muscle tension and chronic painReducing muscle tension and chronic pain
•Improving concentrationImproving concentration
•Reducing anger and frustrationReducing anger and frustration
•Boosting confidence to handle problemsBoosting confidence to handle problems
To get the most benefit, use relaxation techniques along with otherTo get the most benefit, use relaxation techniques along with other
positive coping methods, such as exercising, getting enough sleep, andpositive coping methods, such as exercising, getting enough sleep, and
reaching out to supportive family and friends.reaching out to supportive family and friends.
Book Reference: Kabir, SMS (2017). Essentials of Counseling.
Abosar Prokashana Sangstha, Banglabazar, Dhaka-1100 ISBN:
978-984-8798-22-5, Dkaka - 1100; smskabir@psy.jnu.ac.bd;
smskabir218@gmail.com

27. THANKTHANK YOUYOU