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- 1. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Chapter 4: Friendship, Affection, Love, & Intimacy
- 2. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic How Do Friendship, Affection, & Intimacy Affect Marriages & Families? What is Friendship? • Dyadic Relationship – a relationship between two people, that involves some kind of closeness or mutual affection • Characteristics of Friendship • Friendship vs. Love – Friendship is not usually as exclusive as love – Friendship doesn’t have the same amount of verbal & physical affection as love
- 3. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic • Characteristics of Friendship Continued • True Friendship has Six factors – Respect – Trust – Responsiveness – the affectionate & supportive understanding of another’s needs, values, & desires – Capitalization – being sincerely happy about a friend’s well-being & success – Compare each other’s beliefs & skills ○ Social Comparison – the habit of evaluating one’s skills & qualities by comparing them to others – Social Support – the emotional, verbal, & material help received by others
- 4. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic Friendship Through Life • Dyadic Withdrawal – the diminished involvement in outside social networks by a couple in a romantic relationship
- 5. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic Friendship Through Life • Dyadic Withdrawal – the diminished involvement in outside social networks by a couple in a romantic relationship
- 6. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic • Online & Offline Friendships • Majority of Friendships are maintained offline • Offline friendships characterized with more interdependence, depth, understanding, & commitment • Self-concept impacts online disclosure
- 7. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic • Online & Offline Friendships Continued • Majority of Friendships are maintained offline • Offline friendships characterized with more interdependence, depth, understanding, & commitment • Most studies have not compared the quality of online with off-line relationships • Mixed-mode friendships: friendships which begin online and progress and continue to offline settings • The most important factor of online friendships is perceived similarity • Social attractiveness is the most important for offline and mixed-mode friendships
- 8. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic • Same-Sex & Cross-Sex Friendships • Cross-Sex Friendships are more common today • Sex differences in relating to friends • Researchers agree that men and women can truly be friends • Benefits of cross-sex friendships • When one enters into a long-term relationship, cross- sex relationships tend to decrease
- 9. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic Hooking Up • Casual sexual activity with no strings attached between heterosexual people who are strangers or brief acquaintances • Early 2000s hooking up was already a fairly common practice on US campuses • More common with people displaying extroversion or neuroticism – Neuroticism – a personality trait characterized by negative emotions such as depression, anxiety, anger, embarrassment, vulnerability, & impulsiveness
- 10. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic Hooking Up • Hookups & Dates • Timing of Sex • Level of desire to “get to know” each other • Level of privacy • Level of gender equality – Yet still sigma in the form of sexual double standard ○ The unwritten code of behavior that allows greater sexual freedom to men than to women
- 11. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic Hooking Up • Results of 2011 study • The number of students who “hook up” is increasing • The number of students who remain virgins is increasing as well • How do you think peer pressure affects sexual behavior in teenagers and young adults?
- 12. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic What is Affection? • Physical Affection – the act of displaying affection through kisses, hugs, & physical contact • Verbal Affection – the act of displaying affection through compliments, assertions of love, laughter, etc. • Affection Exchange Theory – postulates that affectionate communication is an adaptive behavior that is instrumental to human survival & procreation
- 13. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic • Physical Affection • Has physiological & emotional benefits • Associated with higher relationship & partner satisfaction • Verbal Affection • Can be expressed in a variety of ways • Style is influenced by gender roles & homophobia – Homophobia – the irrational fear of homosexuals
- 14. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic What is Intimacy? • Autonomy & Intimacy • Intimacy – a feeling of closeness in meaningful relationships characterized by sharing of persona experiences, thoughts, & emotions – Purpose is to establish trust • Autonomy –a state of independence & self- determination • Both necessary in any healthy relationship
- 15. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic • Theories of Intimacy • Dialectic Approach – the relationship model according to which relationships are characterized by an ongoing tension between intimacy & autonomy • Attachment Theory – the theory that states that people’s patterns of attachment are shaped by the intimate bonding they shared with the caregivers during intimacy • Social Exchange Theory – the sociological perspective arguing that satisfaction in a relationship is enhanced when the rewards are greater than the costs
- 16. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic • Theories of Intimacy Continued • Circumplex Model – a graphic model identifying three characteristics of a balanced family system – Family cohesion – Flexibility – Communication • Intimacy & Gender • Women tend to disclose more than males • Girls tend to develop more intimate friendships • Boys tend to focus on physical activities
- 17. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved.
- 18. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic Love • Three components • Emotional – enjoyment, caring, admiration, respect, & passion • Cognitive – expectations & decisions • Behavioral – behaviors adopted to express love • The Influence of Culture & Gender • Countries with individuality important, love = passion • Men love “passionately”; women love “compassionately”
- 19. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic Love Continued • Sexual Orientation, Racial Differences, & Love • Love is influenced by societal forces – Societal Forces – influences coming from or relating to society • Percentage of long-term homosexual relationships is very high • African Americans tend to marry less & divorce more than Caucasian Americans – Also, African Americans tend to be more assertive & less neurotic than Caucasian Americans
- 20. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic Love Continued • Sexual Orientation, Racial Differences, & Love • The 2010 U.S. Census reports that over 130,000 same-sex couples say they are married • The number of same-sex partners has more than doubled since the 2000 U.S. Census • Chaz Bono and transgendered families • Researchers state that sexual orientation and gender identities have almost nothing to do with love, relationships and family roles
- 21. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic General Theories of Love • The Color (Styles) of Love
- 22. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic General Theories of Love Continued • The Prototype Approach • When researchers create a theory of love by gathering the opinions, beliefs, & feelings of people toward love • Maternal love was rated as the best example of prototypical love • Lowest ratings for infatuation, sexual love, & puppy love • Similar approach helped determine the main qualities of love – trust, caring, honesty, friendship, respect, consideration, loyalty, & commitment
- 23. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic Passionate Love vs. Companionate Love • Passionate Love – characterized by overwhelming passion & emotional attachment – Usually starts suddenly & is characterized by idealization ○ Idealization – an unrealistic view of the loved one • Companionate Love – characterized by feelings of trust & friendship & enjoyment of each others’ company • Unlike passionate love, companionate love is always considered a positive experience
- 24. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Get the Topic How to Increase Love in Your Relationships • Love is a mutable feeling that ebbs & flows • Start an open conversation about your ideas of relationships • Get to know your own needs & express them clearly • Act as a team • When confused, disappointed, or angry, speak up & be ready to negotiate • View your relationship as a living thing with its ups & downs
- 25. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved.
- 26. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Think Marriages & Families What are the Theories Behind Love in Marriages & Families? • Functionalism • Monogamy contributes to the social order • Conflict Theory • Love is influenced by having power • Symbolic Interactionism • Couples & family use symbols to represent their idea of love • Love is taught through rituals – Rituals – prescribed sets of actions often connoted by symbolic value & usually adopted by religious & social groups through history
- 27. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved.
- 28. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved.
- 29. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved.
- 30. Copyright 2013 PearsonAll Rights Reserved. Discover Marriages & Families in Action How Can Couples Address Intimacy Problems?