This document provides advice and discussion prompts around peer relationships and dealing with peer pressure. It discusses important qualities to look for in friends, such as trustworthiness and good listening skills. It also addresses different types of peer groups, including popular kids, bullies, and gossipers. The document provides tips for resisting negative peer pressure through assertive communication techniques. It emphasizes remaining true to one's principles rather than chasing popularity or conformity.

1. PEERS & FRIENDS

2. Q OF THE DAY
 Think
of your most memorable
moment with a friend/friends and write
about it. What made it special,
memorable, fun, serious, etc.

3. JOURNAL
 What
are qualities you want in a good
friend?
(Ex: caring, trustworthy, someone who
listens, someone with good advice, etc.)
 Write
down as many things as you can

4. 6 MOST IMPORTANT DECISIONS
Everyone = 91-93 (top of)
 1 = What’s at your center?
 2 = It’s all about popular
 3 = Queen Bees, Wanna Bees, Gamma Girls
 4 = Quirks, Faults, and Foibles
 5 = Mean Girls, Gossips, and bullies
 6 = Crabs and Competition
 7 = How come you don’t kick with us no more?


5. WHAT’S AT YOUR CENTER?!
Are Friends at your center?
 ANY PROBLEMS…?

Friends are imperfect, unstable, and human
 They move
 They change


What SHOULD be at our center?

PRINCIPLES

Honesty…Respect…Responsibility
Principles never fail
 Principles are MAGNETIC!


6. POPULAR: DARK VS LIGHT SIDE

Dark Side


Stuck up, snotty, think
you’re better than
others
Light Side

people that are well
liked and respected
because they are
genuine decent people
(PRINCIPLE
CENTERED  )

7. QUEEN BEE, WANNA BEE AND GAMMA
GIRL
Queen bee: popularity means everything. Protect
clique at all cost and will boot anyone out who tries
to threaten their reign.
 Wanna bee: Those who do whatever it takes to get
in with the Queen Bee.
 Gamma Girl/Boy: kids who may not be known as
“popular” but they are comfortable with who they
are, they like their parents, are smart, and are kind!


8. QUIRKS, FAULTS AND FOIBLES

Just like you, your friends are trying to figure out
who they are and what the purpose of life is….

There is a time to forgive and a time to draw the
line….

9. MEAN GIRLS, GOSSIP, & BULLIES

Gossip we can do things about…
Confront it….(I-message  )
 Live above it. Ignore it and move on


TREAT EACH OTHERS REPUTATIONS WITH CARE!

LEAVE PEOPLE BETTER THAN WHEN YOU FIND
THEM

10. CRABS & COMPETITION

Crabs?? …..
Friends pulling you
down?
 Compare clothes,
looks, abilities and
compete


Think WIN/WIN

I want to win and you
can win too

11. HOW COME DON’T YOU KICK WITH US
ANYMORE?

Friends change…and that’s okay.

Big difference between abandoning your friends
and developing new friends because your interests
change.

Don’t get upset if your naturally start drifting apart
because your interests take you in different
directions

12. QUICK REVIEW!!

BE the type of friend you WANT in others!

Be PRINCIPLE centered friend MAGNET!!!

We all should want to be POPULAR.

But HOW do we make NEW friends?
Care about them
 Ask questions
 Be PRINCIPLE centered 


13. FRIEND MAKING SKILLS

You will develop many kinds of friendships
throughout your life.


Some will be more important to you than others
Common attributes of Friends
Similar values, interests, beliefs and attitudes
 Share joy/disappointment/dreams and concerns
 Respect, care and support
 Concern for each others safety


14. THE NEWLY FRIEND GAME!
Pairings….
Cake/cookie
stomach/ache
 Ebony/ivory
chocolate/chip
 String/cheese
Reeses/pieces
 Ice/cream
dog/cat
 Bread/jam
loose/tooth
 Black/whitehubba/bubba
 Peanut/butter
straw/berry

salt/pepper
nurse/DR
night/day
early/late

15. MAKING & BEING A FRIEND
“You can’t make people like you, but you can
always make yourself more likable.” **Covey
Be slow to judge
 YOU make the effort
 Build the RBA
 Be Inclusive
 Treat Unkindness with
kindness
 Lift others


16. 6 WAYS TO BE MORE LIKEABLE

Dale Carnegie
Become genuinely interested in other people
SMILE!!! 
Remember that a person’s name is to that person
the sweetest and most important sound in any
language.
Be a good listener
Encourage others to talk about themselves. Talk
in terms of the other person’s interests.
Make the other person feel important
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.

And do it sincerely

17. It takes a great deal of
COURAGE to stand up
to your ENEMIES, but a
great deal more to stand
up to your FRIENDS.

19. PEER PRESSURE

When you feel pressured by people in your age
group to act a certain way.

Positive PP: when your friends expect good things
from you

Negative PP: when your friends persuade you to
conform or do something you don’t want to do

Remember your life centered on PRINCIPLES…not
FRIENDS

20. NEGATIVE PEER PRESSURE

Harassment:
Persistently annoying
others

Manipulation:
indirect, dishonest way
to control or influence
other people

21. PEER PRESSURE SHIELD

22. ASSERTIVE REFUSAL SKILLS

State Your Position:


Suggest Alternatives:


NO, firmly and simply
Suggest another activity
Stand Your Ground:
Make it clear you meant what you said
 Remove yourself from the situation


23. JOURNAL

Think of a time when you were pressured.





Who pressured you?
What activity/behavior were you being pressured to do?
What arguments did the person/people pressuring you
use?
How did you respond? If you tried to resist, what did you
say or do?
What might you say or do in the future to resist peer
pressure?

24. 4 RED FLAGS
You may want to suggest a new group of friends
if….
 You have to change your clothes, language, friends,
or standards in order to keep your friends.
 You’re doing stuff you don’t feel good about, like
stealing, fighting, or doing drugs.


You feel like you’re being used

Your life feels out of control