This document summarizes tips and advice for parents on managing their children's technology use from ages 8 to 10. It covers establishing rules and boundaries, monitoring activities, discussing privacy and appropriate online behavior, and fostering open communication. Recommendations include keeping most socializing to moderated sites, reviewing controls like blocking and filtering, and emphasizing parental involvement over restrictive software. Resources for safe search engines and social networking sites are also provided.

1. “Managing Technology with Your Student”
Third & Fourth Grade Parent Peer Group, Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Presented by Barbara Jansen (1-12 Educational Technology Department Chair, US Librarian)
and Mary Whitaker (LS Librarian)
Developmental stages
Age 8 (third graders): Advice & tips
Make sure your kid has capable real-world social skills before he or she starts interacting online.
Keep online socializing to a minimum and confined to sites like Webkinz or Club Penguin, where chat is
pre-scripted or pre-screened.
Explain the basics of good cyber behavior. Tell your kids that things like lying, telling secrets, and being
mean hurt in cyberspace, as well as face to face.
Tell your kids not to share passwords with their friends. A common form of cyberbullying is when kids
log in to another child's email or social networking account and send fake messages or post
embarrassing comments. Kids can protect themselves from this by learning early on that passwords
are private and should only be shared with their parents.
Ages 9-10 (third and fourth graders): Advice & tips
Monitor their use. See what they're posting, check their mobile messages, and let them know you're
keeping an eye on their activities.
Tell your kids what to do if they're harassed. SeeStanding up to Cyberbullying (below) for step-by-step
tips.
If your kid is doing the bullying, establish strict consequences and stick to them. That goes for cruel or
sexual comments about teachers, friends, and relatives.
Chat in online games and virtual worlds can get ugly fast. Make sure your kids are respectful, because
hurtful retaliation happens all the time.
Review anti-bullying controls like flagging and blocking.
(Developmental stages from CommonSense.org)
How can parents keep their kids safe?
1. Articulate and model your family’s values to your kids
a. Let them know what is acceptable to do online and what is not
b. Relate these to your family values
c. Draw up an “Internet bill of rights” a parent/child agreement that is read aloud together. It should
include rules about what personal information should not be disclosed and what type of people
and interactivity should be avoided.
Maintain a family computer in the family’s living space such as living room, kitchen, or other open area--
think twice about letting young children have an Internet accessible computer in their rooms, this includes
smart phones and tablets.
Establish trust
a. Have discussions with your child about technology and about what they are doing
b. Show them the kinds of website that are OK for them to explore and discuss those that are not
c. Tell them that not all websites are friendly and let them know that they should come to you when
they feel uncomfortable about something such as images and words that are contrary to your
family’s values. They should use the back button immediately.

2. Consider benefits and drawbacks to installing filtering or monitoring software
.
a. Blocks access to certain sites based on a bad site list composed by the vendor--sites are
proprietary--you won’t know what is blocked--may be updated for a fee. New websites created
exceeds ability for vendor to update fast enough.
b. Filtering blocks access to sites with certain keywords in the domain name or text. Adult sites
create domain names that do not have any objectionable words. Filters out appropriate sites
that contain words used in innocent contexts (Texas Exes filtered for s-e-x)
c. Monitoring/tracking software keeps lists of what sites user accesses, some track keystrokes.
Does not block or filter sites. May be bundled with filtering/blocking software.
d. Older children will stop trusting you
e. They will quickly figure out how to circumvent the software
f. The best filter is the parent being involved in their lives and paying attention to their online
activities and keeping lines of communication open. Foster trust!
Discuss the concept of privacy and the consequences of posting personally identifiable information
online
.
a. Discuss the reason to use privacy settings
b. Create a screen name for your child to protect their real identity on interactive websites (if they
encounter a situation that makes them feel uncomfortable, the need not worry that someone can
track them down)
c. Share an email account with your children so you can keep track of the messages they send
and receive
d. Tell your child not to ever give out a password--it is a secret we do not even tell our good friends
e. Discourage your child from entering chat rooms or using chat features on interactive websites. If
there is an engaging topic they want to explore, they should ask you to participate alongside
them
f. If your child meets a new “friend” online, have them introduce the friend to you online
g. Do not agree to meet in person anyone met online—people are not always who they pretend to
be
h. Have your child take an Internet safety quiz (see below)
Set “safe search” on Google or other search engine. Tell your kids that they should ask you for good
keywords to put into search engine. Learn how to search smartly yourself! Better yet, require that your kids use
kid friendly search engines only (see below)
Bookmark your child’s favorite websites for easy access
Model and discuss the balance of online and offline lives--if you are always on your smart phone,
laptop, or tablet, what message is sent to your kids?
Do online family activities to demonstrate the fun and useful ways that technology can benefit them
personally (travel blog—and, read about places before visiting, edit and post family vacation or event videos,
post photos online--show the settings to keep these from public access, play games, visit virtual museums,
make collections, learn new skills)
References:
American Psychological Association. 2011. “Social Networking’s Good and Bad Impacts on Kids.”
http://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2011/08/social-kids.aspx
CNN Health. 2011.The Chart by Dr. Sanjay Gupta and Elizabeth Cohen. http://thechart.blogs.cnn.com/2011/08/06/kids-
and-social-networking-pros-and-cons/
Pew Internet and American Life. November 9, 2011. “Teens, kindness and cruelty on social network sites.”
http://pewinternet.org/Reports/2011/Teens-and-social-media.aspx

3. Rideout, Foehr, & Roberts. January 2010. “Generation M2: Media in the lives of 8- to 18-year-olds.” Kaiser Family
Foundation. http://www.kff.org/entmedia/8010.cfm
“Stand up to cyberbullying.” CommonSense.org. http://www.commonsensemedia.org/cyberbullying
“Zero to Eight: Children's Media Use in America.” October 2011. CommonSense.org.
http://www.commonsensemedia.org/research/zero-eight-childrens-media-use-america/key-finding-1%3A-young-
children-use-digital-media-frequently
University of Michigan Health System. 2011. Your child: Development and behavior resources: The Internet.
http://www.med.umich.edu/yourchild/topics/internet.htm
Weeks, Linton. July 2011. “Social networks: Thinking of the children.”
National Public Radio.http://www.npr.org/2011/07/11/137670547/social-networks-thinking-of-the-children and “Ten safe
networking sites for kids.” http://www.npr.org/2011/07/11/137705552/ten-safe-social-networking-sites-for-kids
Resources:
Safe social networking sites for “The Littles” recommended by Commonsense Media
(The recommended ages can be adjusted according to your child’s developmental and social levels)
o Club Penguin Ages 7+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-reviews/club-penguin
o Poptropica 7+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-reviews/poptropica
o ScuttlePad (2010) Age 7+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-reviews/scuttlepad
o Togetherville(2010) Age 7+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-reviews/togetherville
o WhatsWhat.me (2011) Age7+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-
reviews/whatswhatme
o Webkinz 8+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-reviews/webkinz
o Yoursphere (2009) Age 9+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-reviews/yoursphere
o Franktown Rocks (2009) Age 10+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-
reviews/franktown-rocks
o GiantHello (2010) Age 10+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-reviews/gianthello
o GirlSense (2009) Age 10+ http://www.commonsensemedia.org/website-reviews/girlsense
Kid friendly search engines
o Ask for Kids http://www.askkids.com/
o Buddy Browser http://www.buddybrowser.com/Buddy-Browser-Selection.cfm
o KidZuihttp://www.kidzui.com/
o Yahoo! Kids http://kids.yahoo.com/
Cyberbullying
o STOP cyberbullying (ages 7-10) http://www.stopcyberbullying.org/kids/index.htm
o Stand up to cyberbullyinghttp://www.commonsensemedia.org/cyberbullying
Website, TV, & software reviews and Internet safety advice for parents and teachers
o Common Sense Media http://www.commonsensemedia.org/
o Oakland County Moms http://oaklandcountymoms.com/reviews/kids-websites/1567-websites-
for-kids-reviews
Internet Safety
o Google Family Safety Center http://www.google.com/familysafety/
o Internet safety quiz for kids
http://www.missingkids.com/missingkids/servlet/PageServlet?LanguageCountry=en_US&PageI
d=714
o NetSmartz
http://www.netsmartz.org/Parents