This document discusses 10 situations to teach children politeness:
1. Asking with "please" and prompting the child to add it when they forget.
2. Accepting gifts with "thank you" and prompting or saying it on their behalf until it becomes habit.
3. Kindly declining gifts by giving gentle reminders and waiting for the child to respond.
4. Not interrupting by teaching the child to gently tap your arm to get your attention.
5. Getting past someone by saying "excuse me" and having them practice.
6. Saying goodbye phrases like "thank you for coming over."
7. Basic table manners like not throwing food while keeping meals fun.
A few tips and guidelines on how to be effective parents. Some of the topics discussed are;
1. Guidelines for Setting and Maintaining Rules
2. 6 Ways to help kids deal with anger.
3. 6 Things you should never say to your child
Here are a few ways that how you, as a parent, can help your child deal with peer pressure:
1) Don’t Overreact
2) Invite Friends Over
3) Set Family Rules
4) Have a Heart-To-Heart Talk
5) Teach Them Effective Responses
6) Agree on a Bailout Phrase
A few tips and guidelines on how to be effective parents. Some of the topics discussed are;
1. Guidelines for Setting and Maintaining Rules
2. 6 Ways to help kids deal with anger.
3. 6 Things you should never say to your child
Here are a few ways that how you, as a parent, can help your child deal with peer pressure:
1) Don’t Overreact
2) Invite Friends Over
3) Set Family Rules
4) Have a Heart-To-Heart Talk
5) Teach Them Effective Responses
6) Agree on a Bailout Phrase
Part 2 of some slides based on Ted Tripp's book "Shepherding a Child's Heart" and Ginger Plowman's book "Don't Make Me Count to Three" on the subject of using "the rod" in parenting
Immunization remains crucial regardless of what the media says. The relevance of
childhood vaccinations has been relegated to the background by the antivaccination
propaganda, fueled in the mainstream and social media. Providing parents with
When I ask young people about how their parents or teachers can help them to overcome their difficulties, the answer that always comes out on top is:
LISTEN!
So here are a few ideas to make sure you’re listening as effectively as possible.
www.inourhands.com @PookyH
This is a brief synopsis of the bestselling book :"The New: dare to Discipline". I have no affiliation with the author Dr. Dobson, or his work that I have discussed here. This is a presentation made as a part of the psychotherapy seminar: book review series. In my personal oppinion, you should not take every word that is written in the book. Just like most other written things in this world, this should be evaluated and weighed according to the current time and situation. A good decision about parenting should be made, taking into account your own religious cultural and ethnic background, and most importantly the individiual needs of your child. This book does not provide a panacea for child rearing, nor it should be treated as a rule book, but it certainly lays out some basic principles, which shall remain applicable, no matter what tthe circumstances are viz, the need for structure, consistency with regards to parenting, not only in the punishments but in rewards, and how small gratifications and rewards which we do for the children anyways, can be utilized and will go a long way in making good citizens out of them.
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Part 2 of some slides based on Ted Tripp's book "Shepherding a Child's Heart" and Ginger Plowman's book "Don't Make Me Count to Three" on the subject of using "the rod" in parenting
Immunization remains crucial regardless of what the media says. The relevance of
childhood vaccinations has been relegated to the background by the antivaccination
propaganda, fueled in the mainstream and social media. Providing parents with
When I ask young people about how their parents or teachers can help them to overcome their difficulties, the answer that always comes out on top is:
LISTEN!
So here are a few ideas to make sure you’re listening as effectively as possible.
www.inourhands.com @PookyH
This is a brief synopsis of the bestselling book :"The New: dare to Discipline". I have no affiliation with the author Dr. Dobson, or his work that I have discussed here. This is a presentation made as a part of the psychotherapy seminar: book review series. In my personal oppinion, you should not take every word that is written in the book. Just like most other written things in this world, this should be evaluated and weighed according to the current time and situation. A good decision about parenting should be made, taking into account your own religious cultural and ethnic background, and most importantly the individiual needs of your child. This book does not provide a panacea for child rearing, nor it should be treated as a rule book, but it certainly lays out some basic principles, which shall remain applicable, no matter what tthe circumstances are viz, the need for structure, consistency with regards to parenting, not only in the punishments but in rewards, and how small gratifications and rewards which we do for the children anyways, can be utilized and will go a long way in making good citizens out of them.
Windvape tobacco / herb grinder catalog for smoke shopsRaymond Xu
Best tobacco / herb grinders, wholesale catalog for smoke shops worldwide. Windvape is your source for wholesale of smoke shop products including: vaporizers, ecigs, pipes, herb grinders, lighters, ashtrays, etc.
Many people need parenting tips for toddlers. Toddlers are at the age where they want to be independent but still need a lot of help. Toddlers are well known for having a tantrum no matter where they are at. It is best to encourage your child to listen very well and cooperate with you. Just by following these few simple steps you will have a much happier toddler and a much happier you.
Always show your toddler how much you love them, toddlers love the attention lot, lots of hugs and kisses and playtime reassure them how much they are loved. You want the positive attention to way out number the negative attention they get. And praising your toddler for what they do right will usually keep them wanting to follow the rules.
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Name___________________________________________
Inappropriate Methods That Deter Cooperation
Method Example
Blaming and
accusing
“Look at the dirty footprints you put on my clean kitchen floor. You never
consider how hard I work.”
Name-calling “You are the sloppiest person, just look at your room!”
Threats “If you don’t start doing your share around here, I’m going to cut your
allowance.”
Commands “Take the garbage out this minute, and no back talk, young man.”
Lecturing and
moralizing
“Now, do you think that was a nice thing to say about your friend? You
should learn to treat your friends the way you want to be treated.”
Warnings “Don’t step off the sidewalk. You’ll get hit by a car.”
Martyrdom “Why are you doing this to me, hard as I work?”
Comparisons “Why can’t you try as hard in school as your sister does?”
Sarcasm “You knew you had to get up early, but you were so smart and stayed up
until midnight.”
Prophecy “If you continue in the same manner, you’ll never amount to anything.”
Skills for Engaging Cooperation
Skill Example
Describe what you
see or the problem
“Your dirty clothes are on the floor in your room.”
Give information “The battery in the flashlight will last longer when you turn it off after each
use.”
Say it with a word. (when milk is left out of the refrigerator) “Susie, the milk.”
Talk about your
feelings
“I am frustrated because you are making so much noise that I can’t hear
your father on the telephone.”
Wrote a note (taped to basket of clean laundry) “Marlin, please fold me.”
Reference: Hamner, T.J. & Turner, P.H. (2001). Parenting in Contemporary Society, 4
th
ed. ____Allyn and Bacon.
Positive Guidance
Children are more likely to respond to positive statements than negative ones. Rewrite each
statement below so it tells the child what he or she is expected to do.
1. “Don’t put the scissors on the floor.”
2. “Don’t spill your milk.”
3. “Don’t walk in front of the slide.”
4. “You’re pouring too fast.”
5. “Don’t walk so slowly.”
6. “Don’t touch all of the muffins.”
Reference: Herr, J. (2008) Working With Young Children; Study Guide. Tinley Park, ILL: Goodheart-Wilcox,
Co. (page 80).
1
15 Techniques to use with children which invite cooperation
1. Give children valid, appropriate and limited choices. Limit use of commands. Offering options gives
the child a sense of empowerment. This works especially well with children who are strong willed and
in need of a great deal of control. Giving choices eliminates power struggles and “NO” answers.
ie: Do you want your milk poured into the green cup or the blue cup?
ie: You may walk to get your diaper changed or I can carry you. (either way, the diaper is getting
changed).
ie: Say “It’s naptime” rather than “Do you want to take a nap?” which offers the ch.
For most teenagers, puberty comes like a runaway train pulling boxcars of raging hormones creating a powerful combination of physical and mental challenges. The process of teaching the kids about these changes in their bodies and minds can be daunting. However talking to your child about puberty, can definitely help them get through this phase of change. It’s a known fact that during puberty in boys and girls, they worry about being “normal”. Many children are seen to lose their self-esteem, as they enter adolescence much earlier than their friends. Others feel embarrassed when they realize that everyone has gone through it except them. If this is the case, hold on! Try not to dramatize the conversation otherwise, it can make things more awkward and uncomfortable for the teenage mind. The key here is “communication”. Talking to them about what they are going through is very important in helping them understand it’s normal.
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DEPARTMENT OF ENVIRONMENT
THE SINGARENI COLLIERIES COMPANY LIMITED
(A Government Company)
KOTHAGUDEM COLLIERIES-507101 (A.P)
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Environmental and Social Management Framework (ESMF) - Karachi Neighborhood I...zubeditufail
Directorate of Urban Policy & Strategic Planning, Planning & Development Department, Government of Sindh
Karachi Neighborhood Improvement Project
Environmental and Social Management Framework (ESMF)
February 2017
Guiding Principles and Recommendations for Responsible Business Operations in and around Key Biodiversity Areas (KBAs)
A collaborative project of the KBA Partnership coordinated by IUCN
Draft 2 for public consultation
2 December 2016
For any query about this document or the project, please contact Giulia Carbone, Deputy Director, Global Business and Biodiversity Programme, IUCN (Giulia.carbone@iucn.org).
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A Global Standard for the Identification of Key Biodiversity Areas
Version 1.0
Prepared by the IUCN Species Survival Commission and IUCN World Commission on Protected Areas in association with the IUCN Global Species Programme
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Title: Sense of Taste
Presenter: Dr. Faiza, Assistant Professor of Physiology
Qualifications:
MBBS (Best Graduate, AIMC Lahore)
FCPS Physiology
ICMT, CHPE, DHPE (STMU)
MPH (GC University, Faisalabad)
MBA (Virtual University of Pakistan)
Learning Objectives:
Describe the structure and function of taste buds.
Describe the relationship between the taste threshold and taste index of common substances.
Explain the chemical basis and signal transduction of taste perception for each type of primary taste sensation.
Recognize different abnormalities of taste perception and their causes.
Key Topics:
Significance of Taste Sensation:
Differentiation between pleasant and harmful food
Influence on behavior
Selection of food based on metabolic needs
Receptors of Taste:
Taste buds on the tongue
Influence of sense of smell, texture of food, and pain stimulation (e.g., by pepper)
Primary and Secondary Taste Sensations:
Primary taste sensations: Sweet, Sour, Salty, Bitter, Umami
Chemical basis and signal transduction mechanisms for each taste
Taste Threshold and Index:
Taste threshold values for Sweet (sucrose), Salty (NaCl), Sour (HCl), and Bitter (Quinine)
Taste index relationship: Inversely proportional to taste threshold
Taste Blindness:
Inability to taste certain substances, particularly thiourea compounds
Example: Phenylthiocarbamide
Structure and Function of Taste Buds:
Composition: Epithelial cells, Sustentacular/Supporting cells, Taste cells, Basal cells
Features: Taste pores, Taste hairs/microvilli, and Taste nerve fibers
Location of Taste Buds:
Found in papillae of the tongue (Fungiform, Circumvallate, Foliate)
Also present on the palate, tonsillar pillars, epiglottis, and proximal esophagus
Mechanism of Taste Stimulation:
Interaction of taste substances with receptors on microvilli
Signal transduction pathways for Umami, Sweet, Bitter, Sour, and Salty tastes
Taste Sensitivity and Adaptation:
Decrease in sensitivity with age
Rapid adaptation of taste sensation
Role of Saliva in Taste:
Dissolution of tastants to reach receptors
Washing away the stimulus
Taste Preferences and Aversions:
Mechanisms behind taste preference and aversion
Influence of receptors and neural pathways
Impact of Sensory Nerve Damage:
Degeneration of taste buds if the sensory nerve fiber is cut
Abnormalities of Taste Detection:
Conditions: Ageusia, Hypogeusia, Dysgeusia (parageusia)
Causes: Nerve damage, neurological disorders, infections, poor oral hygiene, adverse drug effects, deficiencies, aging, tobacco use, altered neurotransmitter levels
Neurotransmitters and Taste Threshold:
Effects of serotonin (5-HT) and norepinephrine (NE) on taste sensitivity
Supertasters:
25% of the population with heightened sensitivity to taste, especially bitterness
Increased number of fungiform papillae
Basavarajeeyam is an important text for ayurvedic physician belonging to andhra pradehs. It is a popular compendium in various parts of our country as well as in andhra pradesh. The content of the text was presented in sanskrit and telugu language (Bilingual). One of the most famous book in ayurvedic pharmaceutics and therapeutics. This book contains 25 chapters called as prakaranas. Many rasaoushadis were explained, pioneer of dhatu druti, nadi pareeksha, mutra pareeksha etc. Belongs to the period of 15-16 century. New diseases like upadamsha, phiranga rogas are explained.
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In India, pharmacovigilance activities are monitored by the Pharmacovigilance Programme of India (PvPI), which works closely with CDSCO to collect, analyze, and act upon data regarding adverse drug reactions (ADRs). Together, they play a critical role in ensuring that the benefits of drugs outweigh their risks, maintaining high standards of patient safety, and promoting the rational use of medicines.
Flu Vaccine Alert in Bangalore Karnatakaaddon Scans
As flu season approaches, health officials in Bangalore, Karnataka, are urging residents to get their flu vaccinations. The seasonal flu, while common, can lead to severe health complications, particularly for vulnerable populations such as young children, the elderly, and those with underlying health conditions.
Dr. Vidisha Kumari, a leading epidemiologist in Bangalore, emphasizes the importance of getting vaccinated. "The flu vaccine is our best defense against the influenza virus. It not only protects individuals but also helps prevent the spread of the virus in our communities," he says.
This year, the flu season is expected to coincide with a potential increase in other respiratory illnesses. The Karnataka Health Department has launched an awareness campaign highlighting the significance of flu vaccinations. They have set up multiple vaccination centers across Bangalore, making it convenient for residents to receive their shots.
To encourage widespread vaccination, the government is also collaborating with local schools, workplaces, and community centers to facilitate vaccination drives. Special attention is being given to ensuring that the vaccine is accessible to all, including marginalized communities who may have limited access to healthcare.
Residents are reminded that the flu vaccine is safe and effective. Common side effects are mild and may include soreness at the injection site, mild fever, or muscle aches. These side effects are generally short-lived and far less severe than the flu itself.
Healthcare providers are also stressing the importance of continuing COVID-19 precautions. Wearing masks, practicing good hand hygiene, and maintaining social distancing are still crucial, especially in crowded places.
Protect yourself and your loved ones by getting vaccinated. Together, we can help keep Bangalore healthy and safe this flu season. For more information on vaccination centers and schedules, residents can visit the Karnataka Health Department’s official website or follow their social media pages.
Stay informed, stay safe, and get your flu shot today!
These lecture slides, by Dr Sidra Arshad, offer a quick overview of the physiological basis of a normal electrocardiogram.
Learning objectives:
1. Define an electrocardiogram (ECG) and electrocardiography
2. Describe how dipoles generated by the heart produce the waveforms of the ECG
3. Describe the components of a normal electrocardiogram of a typical bipolar lead (limb II)
4. Differentiate between intervals and segments
5. Enlist some common indications for obtaining an ECG
6. Describe the flow of current around the heart during the cardiac cycle
7. Discuss the placement and polarity of the leads of electrocardiograph
8. Describe the normal electrocardiograms recorded from the limb leads and explain the physiological basis of the different records that are obtained
9. Define mean electrical vector (axis) of the heart and give the normal range
10. Define the mean QRS vector
11. Describe the axes of leads (hexagonal reference system)
12. Comprehend the vectorial analysis of the normal ECG
13. Determine the mean electrical axis of the ventricular QRS and appreciate the mean axis deviation
14. Explain the concepts of current of injury, J point, and their significance
Study Resources:
1. Chapter 11, Guyton and Hall Textbook of Medical Physiology, 14th edition
2. Chapter 9, Human Physiology - From Cells to Systems, Lauralee Sherwood, 9th edition
3. Chapter 29, Ganong’s Review of Medical Physiology, 26th edition
4. Electrocardiogram, StatPearls - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK549803/
5. ECG in Medical Practice by ABM Abdullah, 4th edition
6. Chapter 3, Cardiology Explained, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK2214/
7. ECG Basics, http://www.nataliescasebook.com/tag/e-c-g-basics
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10 times to teach politeness
1. 10 Times to Teach Politeness:Raising a Well-
Mannered Child
Posted on August 26, 2014 by Sue Lively
“Get out of my way!!!” shouted Onetime, my 3 year old son, aggressively to another child recently as he
nearly drove his play car over the other child at a local play centre. Okay – maybe I’m exaggerating a bit about
him running the boy over, but the words definitely came out. What a completely mortifying moment – and a
teachable one too. And, perfect timing for today’s “Teaching Kids About Character” post: P is for Politeness.
2. After returning from a morning
with my son, my husband related the above story to me. My instant reaction was horrified embarrassment, and
my second was to ask, “What did you do?”
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I was really pleased with my husband’s answer which went something like this…”I pulled him aside
immediately and told him, “We say excuse me when we want to get by someone.” Then he had Onetime
practise a few times by having him drive in his play car while my husband purposely got in his way.
He made it into a game, and my son got to practise using the more appropriate words to get what he wanted. I
thought it was brilliant and gave my husband a big high-5!
4. Growing up in a household
with a British mother, politeness was always emphasized. My father is also famous for saying how important
5. it is to be considerate of others. As my son’s language is exploding, my husband and I have found that there
have been more and more of these “teachable moments” lately for politeness.
In today’s post, I will list 10 situations to think about when teaching politeness, and some of the strategies I
have tried or heard about for addressing them. I know I’ll be missing some things on this list, but these are the
biggies we’re dealing with now and have been trying to work on since toddlerhood.
1. Asking with a Please
This is one of those habits that you can develop from an early age. When my son was a baby, I started
teaching him sign language to ask for what he wanted, and it was easy enough to add in the please sign after a
little while. Now that being said, we’re still working on this one at age 3.
All I do is whenever Onetime asks for something, if he forgets to say please, I say it for him. For example, if
he says, “Can I have some more juice Mommy?” I say, “please?” and wait for him to add it in. Then I get him
the juice. We are starting to regularly see some really polite asking lately and I know our attention to this one
is paying off!
2. Accepting with a Thank You
6. Such an obvious one – yet I didn’t start really focusing on teaching Onetime to say thank you until he was
almost 1 1/2! Definitely waited too long. And we could have started even earlier withsign
language. Oops! I’ll file that away until next time.
I remember having a friend over with her toddler son who still wasn’t speaking much yet, and I gave him and
my son a snack and I was astounded when out popped “Thank you” from this other boy. I hadn’t heard a peep
out of this boy the entire morning, but he knew this social grace already!
Well, I hopped on the bandwagon after that and started prompting for Thank you’s whenever we gave my son
something.
I never wanted him to feel bad or guilty about not saying it – I just wanted it to become a habit, so I’ve tried to
be very careful about the tone of my voice when I prompt.
I keep it to a plain verbal reminder “Thank you,” after I give him something… if he doesn’t say it first. Again
– just like the pleases, we are beginning to hear this one more and more these days without a reminder.
7. How I address my son giving thanks when someone else gives him something is quite different,
though. Instead of prompting him out loud to say “Thank you” for a gift (which can be embarrassing for a
child, especially as they get older according to Alfie Kohn), if my son forgets to say it, I say thank you on his
behalf. “What a wonderful gift! Thank you so much for finding something Onetime likes.”
I figure this way, my son hears some good modelling of manners, and the gift-giver feels appreciated. A
double-win!
Generally, in situations where I know that there will be many gifts (like a birthday party), we have a little chat
ahead of time too so that Onetime is reminded to try to remember to give his thanks. To read more about
encouraging thankfulness, be sure to read our G is for Grateful post from earlier in our series.
3. Kindly Declining Gifts
Being able to say No gracefully is also a
habit that can be taught. This one is especially important for my son because he has a severe peanut allergy
and will often have to say “No thank you,” if offered food he’s not sure is safe.
Basically, we’re just approaching this one in the same way as the pleases and thank yous. Agentle verbal
reminder when the situation occurs, with an added, “I have a peanut allergy and I’m not sure it’s safe.”
8. I just wait a few seconds after my son has been offered something to give my son a chance to answer, then I
add in any parts that he has left out.
This was a method I was taught to use with autistic preschoolers and brain-injured teens to extend language. It
worked for them and eventually, it should work for Onetime.
As an aside, for any kids, this is a useful tool for them to use easily if a stranger asks if they want a treat. If
this is a phrase they have practised, it will be much easier for them to turn an offer down and then quickly get
away.
4. Interrupting
This is one that’s becoming more of a priority as my son’s language is developing. Doesn’t it seem like
whenever you pick up the telephone to have a conversation, your child all of a sudden is desperate for your
attention and has to tell you something right away?
I can’t remember where I read about this strategy, but I think it’s a good one and we’re starting to work on it.
Basically, the idea is to teach your child to put their hand on your arm when you are talking to someone and
they need to tell you something.
To teach this habit, have a chat with your child ahead of time about interrupting. Maybe before you pick up
the phone to make a call. Tell them what you want them to do andshow them.
Explain to them that as soon as you feel their arm on your arm, you
will put your hand on top of theirs so they know you know that they need to tell you something.
9. Explain that as soon as you can, you will turn to them and give them your attention. Remind them that they
may have to wait for a short time. You could even practise with a couple of pretend calls if you want.
Then put your plan into action. The next time you’re talking with someone, or on the phone, and your child
comes running over, don’t stop talking to your friend (otherwise we’re rewarding the interrupting
behaviour). Instead, make eye-contact with your child if you can, and guide their hand onto your arm.
It’s probably best to not make your child wait too long the first few times. They need to see that this new habit
will actually work after all.
Once your child gets the hang of this little signal, you can start to have them wait a little longer. This one
takes lots of practise, but stick with it and it should become a polite habit!
5. Getting Past Someone with Excuse Me
I really can’t add any more to my husband’s wonderfulteaching example from the start of the
post. Prompting, giving them the right words to use, and then practising should make this one into a habit.
6. Goodbyes
I learned this one from my friend when we were over at her house for a playdate. She prompted her two sons
to say, “Thank you for coming over!” when we were about to leave. I thought that was really nice and we
have worked on that one ever since, as well as,“Thanks for having me over!“
As an aside, I personally wouldn’t advocate asking your child to give the mandatory hugs and kisses to
relatives when it’s time for them to leave. At some point, I read that this can start to give your child mixed
messages about affection and their own control over their bodies.
We want our son to give hugs freely and when he feels connected and loving, not because someone is telling
him to do it. Can you see the danger in your child learning to follow directions to do these kinds of things?
Instead, we might tell our son in private, “Nan and Grandpa are leaving now. If you want to give them a hug
and kiss to say good-bye – now is a good time.” Then it’s his choice and he remains in controlof his own
body and comfort level.
7. Table Manners
This can be such a huge one for families. So much of what we expect here tends to be from how we were
raised and what mealtimes were like when we were kids.
10. I’ve talked with a number of
different parents about this at various parenting workshops, and the consensus seems to be that we need
to expect basic polite behaviour at the table (no feet on the table, no throwing food, no potty talk), while
recognizing that young children have developmental limitations for how long they can actually sit still, as well
as limitations on what can be reasonably expected at a young age.
At my house, we try to make mealtime enjoyable. According to Karen Le Billon, author ofFrench Kids Eat
Everything: How Our Family Moved to France, Cured Picky Eating, Banned Snacking, and Discovered 10
Simple Rules for Raising Happy, Healthy Eaters, keeping mealtimes fun is more likely to encourage your
children to eat better!
We talk about how yummy the food is and about fun things we did that day. We make jokes and get a little
goofy sometimes. But, my son is also expected to have basic table manners.
We discourage him from blowing bubbles in his drinks, playing with his food without eating it, and we remind
him frequently to finishing chewing before speaking, and to use his utensils instead of his fingers.
When my son is done eating, we have taught him to ask, “May I be excused?” At that point, he is expected to
take his plate over to the kitchen counter, and then he can go off and play quietly by himself where we can see
him.
Another friend of mine keeps her kids all at the table until everyone is finished, but she provides colouring
sheets and crayons for her youngest (age 2 1/2) to keep him busy until they are done eating.
8. Getting What You Want
11. It seems to be a stage in the preschooler’s language and psychological development for them to start ordering
their parents and others around. A few months ago, we noticed one day that Onetime had suddenly started
telling my husband and I what to do!
Phrases like, “Daddy, pick me up!” and “Mommy, get my blankey,” were becoming commonplace. He was
becoming a little drill sargeant, and it was time to start teaching him that you can catch more flies with honey
than with vinegar!
Basically, I started teaching him to rephrase his wishes into a question. When he would say, “Mommy, get my
blankey.” I would respond with, “Mommy, can you get my blankey,please?” Then I would wait until he
rephrased his initial command into a question. After he asked nicely, I would get him the blankey.
That being said, I don’t always do what he asks me to do. Sometimes, I can’t, or don’t want to, and I tell him
as much! But, most of the time, because I want to reinforce his politeness, I will help him out – just to show
him that the way he asks can make all the difference in gaining someone’s cooperation.
9. Needing Space
This is a tough one for kids to be polite about. Sometimes when they are feeling crowded, kids will come out
swinging and shouting!
A year or so ago I read about a simple phrase that you can teach your child to use when they want privacy or
feel crowded. “Ineed more space.” Simple as that.
I started prompting Onetime to say this when he was a toddler. Any time that I would see from his face that he
was feeling uncomfortable with the noise level around him, or his personal space was being invaded, I would
say the words for him to the surrounding children.
As a preschooler, he says it himself now about 75% of the time – sometimes loudly! But, it’s still more polite
than “Get out of my way!” or yelling something else! To read more about teaching this phrase, check out our F
is for Friendly post.
12. 10. Appropriate
Talk
Hopefully, you haven’t experienced the need to teach this lesson yet! It’s almost an inevitable one though. At
some point, your sweet little cherub is going to pop out an unexpected expletive and you’re either going to
kick yourself for saying it within their hearing range, or wonder where in the heck they heard it from!
The best advice I have found for addressing this one is in Judy Arnall’s book Discipline Without Distress: 135
tools for raising caring, responsible children without time-out, spanking, punishment or bribery. By the way, I
love her book and have found it extremely useful for dealing with all sorts of challenging behaviours. To read
a review of her book, click here.
13. Basically Judy advises you to let your child know that that language is undesirable and unacceptable with your
family. She also suggests teaching kids a replacement word for the swear-word, if they have used it properly
in context while frustrated or angry. We are teaching Onetime to say, “Darn!” or “I’m frustrated.”
Unfortunately, Onetime has let loose a few swear words that he has overheard. And it was both embarrassing
and (I have to admit) sort of funny at the same time. At one point, he latched onto the word “Damn” that he
overheard from a visitor and began chanting it over and over with glee while doing a little dance too! I swear
he actually has a radar for picking up on the ONE word that he shouldn’t be repeating.
Anyway – although tempted to laugh, we didn’t – and after briefly explaining that that was not an acceptable
word for him to use, we ignored his little dance. Eventually, it petered out from lack of attention, and the word
hasn’t come up again.
Now there have been other incidences where Onetime has latched onto some strange words – probably because
they get a reaction. My son is a little ham who likes to make people laugh, and he’ll go with what works!
Lately, it’s been the word “vomit” and “cigarettes.” He likes to shoot out “vomit” randomly at strange times,
and has created a little repeating chant for the word “cigarettes” which is actually quite catchy! (I caught
myself chanting it under my breath yesterday while making dinner.)
Although, both of these words are not swear words, they are inappropriate (not to mention embarrassing) for
him to be chanting and shouting out. After getting too much attention for using them the first few times (“What
– vomit? Why are you saying that? Are you going to throw up? Are you feeling okay?”), they’ve been a little
harder to extinguish than the “Damn” scenario. And my husband and I have learned our lesson! No more
laughing at these kinds of things.
I am confident though, that by not over-reacting, and just briefly explaining that these are not appropriate
things to shout out, Onetime will come to lose interest in saying them and he’ll find another way to make us
laugh!
Punishing him for saying these things doesn’t make sense to me, because he’s only 3 and is
just experimenting with the power of language. I would rather him learn from our bored reactions, than try to
time-out his speech “experiments.”
14. And that brings us to the end of the 10 Times to Teach Politeness. After talking with a friend who’s also a
mom about this topic this morning, we both agreed that beingconsistent about teaching these lessons is
important.
If we want politeness to become a habit, we have to be on top of these things so our kids get a consistent
message about the importance of these social graces. That being said, we all do the best we can and sometimes
75% of the time is good enough!
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