Hey, it’s you! (waves somewhat maniacally) Welcome back to TheJack Point Home for Pedestrian Playables, a Residential Facilityfor People with Psychological Differences Challenge!Our playable, Leila Shankel, wants to become a fairy, or at least tohave fairy wings surgically implanted. Since this costs a lot ofmoney, she is currently working two jobs and saving up. Leilamade President last time, and had a fight about her goals in lifewith her boyfriend Abhijeet. A grand total of three residents andone visitor have died, and nobody is happy. Not even a little bit.Which I believe is all you need to know to be able to follow along!
Let’s pick up right where we left off, shall we? When I sent Leilato bed last rotation, I didn’t realize that the other beds were alreadyoccupied. Because I can’t wake up the inm -- residents, I decidedthat the first person awake would be the one to have their bed takenaway.Congratulations, Leila! You are the winner!…Sort of…
As it turned out, Leila was actually able to get to the stove, but shehad to Get Hamburger -- she couldn’t just clean it up. Despite mybest efforts, she took one bite of it before the action cancelled.
One teeny tiny bite!Okay, if standing up is out, then so is skilling Charisma. You haveto stand up in front of a mirror for that.
You can build logic skill while sitting down, though.On second thought, why play Mr. Nobody? That’s a waste of avaluable friend-making opportunity! So Leila invited over hersister Phoebe and Phoebe’s in-laws: husband Chant, grandfather-in-law Oliver, and mother-in-law Fantine.
FANTINE: What’s that I smell?LEILA: Some of the in -- er, residents aren’t very good aboutpersonal hygiene. Sorry.FANTINE: No, it smells like smoke. And the light in your kitchenlooks awful funny.LEILA: Oh, come on! Are you seriously trying to cheat someoneyou only just met?FANTINE: Fine, let your house burn down. No skin off my nose.
CHANT: Um, Leila? I think your house is on fire.IVANOVA: Ms. Shankel, how can you let things come to thismore than once? What type of residential facility are you running?Anyone would think you wanted your charges to die!
Okay, okay. I can handle this. Have Leila say goodbye to theguests, because Phoebe would never forgive her if her husbandburned to death. Then break out the fire extinguisher for Ivanova.
Thank goodness! It worked! Now on to the next resident to catchfire.JEFFINA: Why are you worrying about me? I’m made of titanium-- the fire would have to be much hotter to make a difference. Gotake care of Milton!LEILA: What do you mean, “go take care of Milton”?
JOE: Miltie-poo! Over here!MILTON: I can’t! The rabbits are in the way! (clutches at hishead) Run! I’m done for, but you can still save yourselves! Run!(softly) Wait for me, Ernie…
LEILA: Why is this happening to me?IVANOVA: Subject is displaying classic delusions of reference.Negative events are clearly not happening to the subject.LEILA: I’m in charge of this place -- it’s my responsibility!IVANOVA: Excellent point! Subject also displays irresponsiblebehavior. Well, I’m super hungry. I think I’ll head (yawns) up tobed now.Unfortunately, she didn’t make it.
Behold the Official residential facility collage showing the waythings stood at the end of unlucky Day Thirteen. You can see thatIvanova has fallen asleep in front of the stairs, rendering themcompletely useless. You can also see that the man in the pinkgorilla suit and the embarrassing underpants is the most togetherperson in the whole place, which is just wrong.Don’t worry: I collapsed all the panels so that I couldn’t seeanything when selecting the residents. They were selected forexactly long enough to hit the “C” key, and I gave them nocommands of any kind.
Leila fell asleep standing up in her bedroom, for lack of anywhereelse.Yes, those are pretty violent stink waves. But you see, the tub isupstairs…
Everyone has their own ways of coping, and thisis Joe’s.JOE: Excuse me, Professor, but how does theGrim Reaper decide who to take?PROFESSOR VON BALL:JOE: Wow, I never knew that! So is that what’swrong with Ivanova?PROFESSOR VON BALL:JOE: I don’t know what’s wrong with her. That’swhy I asked you.
Yes, as it turns out, going to sleep is not the mostappropriate cure for imminent starvation.Who’dathunk it?LEILA: Will everyone please get out of my way?There’s a bed and a bathtub upstairs, and I mightjust fall asleep in the tub, I’m so tired!GRIM REAPER: .’m wor…g a. .ar. an. a. .a.. a. Ica.. Cu. .e .om. ..ack, .il. .ou?
Ivanova was not much liked by the remainingresidents, so she was not much missed. Leilapromptly went upstairs to take her bath. Jeffinawent to bed, for all the good it did her. (Whoknew robots could have nightmares?) And Joedecided to make a late run for the AspirationFailure Championships.
Come morning, Leila tempted fate by taking thetime to clean up the kitchen a bit instead ofresting.Jeffina helped by throwing away a perfectly goodplate of open-faced sandwiches.
Leila fixed the sink.Joe made sure he wasn’t in the way. Such aconsiderate fellow!
And when Leila had an almost-friend over for a friendship-building sit-down game of chess, Jeffina and Joe did their best tokeep their guest entertained.Leila gained a new friend anyway, and was well enough to go towork on Day Fifteen.
Since “taking care of themselves” is not reallyin either Joe or Jeffina’s repertoire, I seriouslyconsidered not restoring the kitchen once theashes were swept up. But then I realized thatthe espresso machine was an absolute necessitynow that we are down to just one bed, so I puteverything back after all.I mean, we can only have two more fire deaths,maximum…
And at least there really isn’t anything else that can go wrong.Until next time, Happy Simming!
The Grim Reaper said:I’m working as hard and as fast as I can. Cut me some slack, willyou?
ScoreBase score: 100Minus number of days in the asylum: -15Total: 85Running totalsFires: 4Potty accidents: 10Sponge baths: 5Aspiration failures: 25Shrink visits: 7Pass outs from exhaustion: 5Deaths: 5 (residents), 1 (visitors)