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Becoming a Person of
Influence
BE BOLD. BE CONFIDENT. BE COURAGEOUS.
WITH
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 2
Welcome
University of Wisconsin ~ Milwaukee
6th Annual Leadership Conference
Becoming a Person of Influence
Becoming a person of influence and having a positive impact on others can happen with anyone
at any level.
As leaders, learn how to positively impact change in your organization as well as influence those
you work with and for in this session.
In this session, participants will be able to:
Better understand the power of influence and its relationship to leadership and change
Apply principles learned to increase results in their personal and professional lives
Become a more strategic leader and influencer of change
3/26/2015 3
Inspirational Speaker, Leadership Trainer,
Executive Leadership Coach, & Courageous Life Mentor
Charlotte, NC – We’ve only had 3 inches of snow!
Founder, Courageous Life Academy
Change Strategist (HR/Org Development)
Certified Coach, Speaker, and Trainer
2015 Adventure: Ziplining!
What’s yours?
Living and Leading Courageously happens
by DESIGN not by happenstance!
3/26/2015 4
Influence:
Definition: (Merriam)
The power to change or affect someone or something :
The power to cause changes without directly forcing them to happen
A person or thing that affects someone or something in an important way
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 5
WHY,
Do You Need or Want
Influence?
WHAT WILL YOU DO WITH IT?
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 6
Why Influence Matters:
Your why has to be big enough or you will keep living and leading the same
Your why has to be sincere enough or you will abuse it
It matters because:
If your influence is not growing, you’re not growing
Teams are transformed by it
Organizations grow as a result of it
New ideas are implemented because of it
Adverse situations are corrected more quickly because of it
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 7
Influence Blockers
INFLUENCE STARTS WITH US!
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 8
Intimidation vs. Influence
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 9
Resistance Hesitation
Second-
Guessing
Too much
forward
thinking
Self-Doubt
How you look!
How you feel!
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 10
Becoming a Person of Influence
Perfectionism with Brene Brown
(Oprah’s Lifeclass)
Becoming a Person of Influence is not:
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 11
Experience
Title
Network
Income
Mentor/
Sponsor
Education
Span of
Control
LEADERSHIPAge
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 12
Influence
Blockers
Confidence
Comparison
Courage
Even the most
introverted person will
reach 10,000 people!
The Law of Influence
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 13
The True Measure of
Leadership is Influence,
Nothing More, Nothing Less
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 14
I’m not afraid of failure,
but I am afraid of regret!
Dynamics of Influence
INFLUENCE STARTS WITH US!
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 15
Dynamics of Influence
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 16
What
We
Believe
What We
Say
How
We Act
What we say
accounts for
___% of what
the other
person walks
away with!
Body Language
INFLUENCE STARTS WITH US!
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 17
Authoritative Body Language:
People Who Play High:
Relaxed, open state – At the top of the hierarchy you have nothing to worry about
Assume others will move out of their path when walking
Keep their head perfectly still while talking
Talk in complete sentences (clear beginning and clear end point)
Hold your eye contact
When addressing someone else – they don’t let them out of their gaze
They feel free to look around, they have other things on your mind
They interrupt before they know what they are going to say
Playing high is a sense of dominance; people will defer
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 18
Authoritative Body Language:
People Who Play Low:
Hold your body close and tight
Make themselves as small as they can (minimize your footprint)
Prepare themselves to hide from others or fend off a blow
Attempt to shrink and hide
Speak in incomplete sentences
Fleeting and jerking movements
Talk with their hands close to their mouth
Do a lot more glancing around but no actual eye contact
Do a lot more smiling.
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 19
Authoritative Body Language:
People Who Play Low:
It is the basis of building repertoire
For a lower ranking person it’s good that the people above you know that you
get their position and that you understand yours;
For a high ranking person it helps them to build repertoire
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 20
Authoritative Body Language:
Acting with Power – Switch your use of styles
To make yourself more comfortable
To make others more comfortable
Give ourselves permission to use when its required
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 21
Authoritative Body Language:
Success:
It’s not about playing high or low
It’s about being able to recognize what situations its required and being able to adapt to them
It’s about making subtle kinds of changes; its not about a major overhaul of our behavior
 How are you standing? How do you sit down?
 What are you doing with your head and your eyes when you’re speaking? Listening?
Backing off things that we may have a knee jerk reactions too
There are dual challenges:
 Meet the expectations associated with high level organizational rules
 Meet the expectations associated with our gender roles
Give yourself permission to try something new!
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 22
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 23
Becoming a Person of Influence
Ban Bossy
(Lean In)
Enter the Room Like
Your Belong There!
YOUR PRESENCE MATTERS
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 24
Influencers Are:
People-
Oriented
RelentlessCourageousVisionary
Problem-
Solvers
Great
Leaders
PassionatePersistent
What
Else?
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 25
“Every message that
people receive is
filtered through
the messenger who
delivers it.”
Who’s Listening?
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 26
Who’s Following You?
Leader + Vision = Result
Don’t buy in Don‘t buy in Get another leader
Don’t buy in Buy in Get another leader
Buy in Don’t buy in Get another vision
Buy in Buy in Get behind the
leader
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 27
Intentional Influence™
Belief
What is
getting in
your way?
Value
Where and
to whom
do you
want to add
more
value?
Legacy
What
impact do
you want to
have?
Behavior
Change
What will
you
practice
over the
next
7 days?
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 28
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 29
Courage
is a
Repetitive Action
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 30
Becoming a Person of Influence
Believing in Yourself with Oprah
(Oprah’s Lifeclass)
Dynamics of Influence
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 31
What
We
Believe
What We
Say
How
We Act
What we say
accounts for
7% of what
the other
person walks
away with!
OWN YOUR SEAT AT
THE TABLE!
BE BOLD. BE CONFIDENT. BE COURAGEOUS.
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 32
Thank
You!
3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 33
www.courageouslifeacademy.com/uwm
I Live and Lead Courageously!
@melissajnixon

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Becoming a person of influence

  • 1. Becoming a Person of Influence BE BOLD. BE CONFIDENT. BE COURAGEOUS. WITH
  • 2. 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 2 Welcome University of Wisconsin ~ Milwaukee 6th Annual Leadership Conference
  • 3. Becoming a Person of Influence Becoming a person of influence and having a positive impact on others can happen with anyone at any level. As leaders, learn how to positively impact change in your organization as well as influence those you work with and for in this session. In this session, participants will be able to: Better understand the power of influence and its relationship to leadership and change Apply principles learned to increase results in their personal and professional lives Become a more strategic leader and influencer of change 3/26/2015 3
  • 4. Inspirational Speaker, Leadership Trainer, Executive Leadership Coach, & Courageous Life Mentor Charlotte, NC – We’ve only had 3 inches of snow! Founder, Courageous Life Academy Change Strategist (HR/Org Development) Certified Coach, Speaker, and Trainer 2015 Adventure: Ziplining! What’s yours? Living and Leading Courageously happens by DESIGN not by happenstance! 3/26/2015 4
  • 5. Influence: Definition: (Merriam) The power to change or affect someone or something : The power to cause changes without directly forcing them to happen A person or thing that affects someone or something in an important way 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 5
  • 6. WHY, Do You Need or Want Influence? WHAT WILL YOU DO WITH IT? 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 6
  • 7. Why Influence Matters: Your why has to be big enough or you will keep living and leading the same Your why has to be sincere enough or you will abuse it It matters because: If your influence is not growing, you’re not growing Teams are transformed by it Organizations grow as a result of it New ideas are implemented because of it Adverse situations are corrected more quickly because of it 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 7
  • 8. Influence Blockers INFLUENCE STARTS WITH US! 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 8
  • 9. Intimidation vs. Influence 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 9 Resistance Hesitation Second- Guessing Too much forward thinking Self-Doubt How you look! How you feel!
  • 10. 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 10 Becoming a Person of Influence Perfectionism with Brene Brown (Oprah’s Lifeclass)
  • 11. Becoming a Person of Influence is not: 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 11 Experience Title Network Income Mentor/ Sponsor Education Span of Control LEADERSHIPAge
  • 12. 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 12 Influence Blockers Confidence Comparison Courage Even the most introverted person will reach 10,000 people!
  • 13. The Law of Influence 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 13 The True Measure of Leadership is Influence, Nothing More, Nothing Less
  • 14. 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 14 I’m not afraid of failure, but I am afraid of regret!
  • 15. Dynamics of Influence INFLUENCE STARTS WITH US! 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 15
  • 16. Dynamics of Influence 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 16 What We Believe What We Say How We Act What we say accounts for ___% of what the other person walks away with!
  • 17. Body Language INFLUENCE STARTS WITH US! 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 17
  • 18. Authoritative Body Language: People Who Play High: Relaxed, open state – At the top of the hierarchy you have nothing to worry about Assume others will move out of their path when walking Keep their head perfectly still while talking Talk in complete sentences (clear beginning and clear end point) Hold your eye contact When addressing someone else – they don’t let them out of their gaze They feel free to look around, they have other things on your mind They interrupt before they know what they are going to say Playing high is a sense of dominance; people will defer 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 18
  • 19. Authoritative Body Language: People Who Play Low: Hold your body close and tight Make themselves as small as they can (minimize your footprint) Prepare themselves to hide from others or fend off a blow Attempt to shrink and hide Speak in incomplete sentences Fleeting and jerking movements Talk with their hands close to their mouth Do a lot more glancing around but no actual eye contact Do a lot more smiling. 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 19
  • 20. Authoritative Body Language: People Who Play Low: It is the basis of building repertoire For a lower ranking person it’s good that the people above you know that you get their position and that you understand yours; For a high ranking person it helps them to build repertoire 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 20
  • 21. Authoritative Body Language: Acting with Power – Switch your use of styles To make yourself more comfortable To make others more comfortable Give ourselves permission to use when its required 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 21
  • 22. Authoritative Body Language: Success: It’s not about playing high or low It’s about being able to recognize what situations its required and being able to adapt to them It’s about making subtle kinds of changes; its not about a major overhaul of our behavior  How are you standing? How do you sit down?  What are you doing with your head and your eyes when you’re speaking? Listening? Backing off things that we may have a knee jerk reactions too There are dual challenges:  Meet the expectations associated with high level organizational rules  Meet the expectations associated with our gender roles Give yourself permission to try something new! 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 22
  • 23. 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 23 Becoming a Person of Influence Ban Bossy (Lean In)
  • 24. Enter the Room Like Your Belong There! YOUR PRESENCE MATTERS 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 24
  • 26. “Every message that people receive is filtered through the messenger who delivers it.” Who’s Listening? 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 26
  • 27. Who’s Following You? Leader + Vision = Result Don’t buy in Don‘t buy in Get another leader Don’t buy in Buy in Get another leader Buy in Don’t buy in Get another vision Buy in Buy in Get behind the leader 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 27
  • 28. Intentional Influence™ Belief What is getting in your way? Value Where and to whom do you want to add more value? Legacy What impact do you want to have? Behavior Change What will you practice over the next 7 days? 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 28
  • 29. 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 29 Courage is a Repetitive Action
  • 30. 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 30 Becoming a Person of Influence Believing in Yourself with Oprah (Oprah’s Lifeclass)
  • 31. Dynamics of Influence 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 31 What We Believe What We Say How We Act What we say accounts for 7% of what the other person walks away with!
  • 32. OWN YOUR SEAT AT THE TABLE! BE BOLD. BE CONFIDENT. BE COURAGEOUS. 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 32
  • 33. Thank You! 3/26/2015 BECOMING A PERSON OF INFLUENCE ©COURAGEOUS LIFE ACADEMY 33 www.courageouslifeacademy.com/uwm I Live and Lead Courageously! @melissajnixon