Apologizing interrupting excusing


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Pragmatics lesson from my Business English Class

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  • http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2012/09/28/161972855/fox-news-smith-apologizes-after-man-commits-suicide-on-airhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGqBHa3KGPwhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vxm1ceD6VEU
  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F07B-BJo41E (sheldon’s reaction)
  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_6SfMZxoLchttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bkFVQf9ewhY&feature=fvwrelhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-Z2GM4EaI8&feature=related (inappropriate speech)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEQENN21ZWE&feature=related (ronpaul)
  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_6SfMZxoLc (TED)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-Z2GM4EaI8&feature=related (inappropriate speech)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEQENN21ZWE&feature=related (ronpaul)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dOpcz1eRy8 (sheldon)
  • Apologizing interrupting excusing

    2. 2. Overview Apologies Interruptions Excusing Oneself
    3. 3. ApologizingAsking Forgiveness
    4. 4. Definition: “Apologize” To express regret for doing or saying something wrong: to give or make an apology Source: Merriam Webster’s Learners Dictionary (Online)
    5. 5. Why & When Do We ApologizeWhy When Clarifies  You have responsibility misunderstandings for causing Indicates status (those in misunderstanding/proble power seldom m. apologize)  You are trying to show Shows respect for others deference to someone Improves relationships  You want to show respect  You do not want someone to become or remain angry
    6. 6. Expressions Im very sorry for / that ... I apologize if I ... I apologize for (+ ing form of verb) Please forgive me for … I didn’t mean to …
    7. 7. Formula for Apologies Apology  Take responsibility and say you are sorry.  Ex. I am sorry that I ate your apple. Reason  Tell them why you did what you did (if appropriate).  Ex. It was on my desk, and I didn’t know it belonged to you. Promise or Action  Promise you will try not to do it again.  Ex. Next time, I will ask before eating something.  Action – do something to try to fix the situation.  Ex. Let me buy you a new one.
    8. 8. Sample Apologies-Appropriate?Analyze the following apologies: Apology by News Broadcaster Sheldon Apologizes to Penny Buddy’s Big Apology (The Nutty Professor) Kramer’s Apology
    9. 9. Discussion How would you apologize in the following situations?  If you accidentally bumped into the person next to you in line.  If you missed class or a meeting.  If you are late for meeting or interview.  If you forgot to bring something you needed.  If you inadvertently insulted someone.  If you dropped and broke something.
    10. 10. Reactions to Apologies It is customary to accept an apology with phrases such as:  Apology accepted.  It’s ok  Don’t worry about it.  That’s all right.  Never mind.  You don’t need to apologize.  Don’t mention it.  I quite understand. I’m sure you couldn’t help it.  No harm done.
    11. 11. Reactions to Apologies On some occasions, an apology may not be accepted if the injured party feels the apology is insincere or the offense was too serious to forgive easily. This can lead to strained relationships if it is not resolved quickly.
    12. 12. Practice Over the next few days, make note of a few things:  The situations where you hear people apologizing  The reasons for the apology  The reaction Use a chart similar to Reason below. Situation Apology the one Reaction A person “I’m so sorry, They knocked The victim bumped into that was my the person’s accepted help. another person fault. Let me books down. in the hallway. help you.”
    13. 13. InterruptingButting in…
    14. 14. Definition: Interrupt 1 : to ask questions or say things while another person is speaking : to do or say something that causes someone to stop speaking [+ obj] 2 [+ obj] : to cause (something) to stop happening for a time 3 [+ obj] : to cause (something) to not be even or continuous : to change or stop the sameness or smoothness of (something)
    15. 15. Why We InterruptHere are just a few reasons why we interruptothers:  To tell someone something important  To add information  To get more information  To ask for clarification  To say hello  To try to be helpful  To agree/disagree
    16. 16. When to interrupt When the person has finished saying what they have to say When the person speaking slows down When the speaker pauses When they send non-verbal signals that they are finishing or are ready for interruption. When the speaker has had a fair amount of time to speak.
    17. 17. Ways to interrupt Agreement Interrupt: Enthusiastically agree. Body Language Interrupt: Non-verbal signal intent to butt in. Clarification Interrupt: Ask for clarification. Check you understand. Continuation Interrupt: Pick up where they might leave off. Disagreement Interrupt: Disagree with what is said. Disinterest Interrupt: Appear disinterested in what they say.
    18. 18. Ways to Interrupt Distraction Interrupt: Become distracted by something else. Encouragement Interrupt: Keep them talking. External Interrupt: Use a third party to interrupt. Identity Interrupt: Prod the identity of the person. Loudmouth Interrupt: Talk more loudly than the other person. Motormouth Interrupt: Jump in and talk quickly.
    19. 19. Ways to Interrupt Question Interrupt: Just ask them a question. Power Interrupt: Use your power to grab control. Permission Interrupt: Ask if you can interrupt. Touch Interrupt: Touch them gently as you interrupt. Yes, and Interrupt: Say Yes, and,... Yes, but Interrupt: Say Yes, but...’
    20. 20. Interruption Examples TED “Interruption” Inappropriate Speech: Don’t Interrupt Ron Paul Interrupted Angry person interrupted Sheldon Being Interrupted George on the Phone Linda Thomson Meeting Catch Me If You Can
    21. 21. Practice What would you say or do to appropriately interrupt in the following situations?  To interrupt to ask a question in the middle of class  To interrupt your boss in a meeting to clarify something  To interrupt your friend’s conversation to say hi  To interrupt your coworker’s conversation over lunch to tell them you both need to return to the office.  To interrupt your parents to tell them good news
    22. 22. Excusing Oneself“Excuse me”
    23. 23. What is “Excusing”Someone/thing?1 To forgive someone for something bad thatthey have done, especially something that is notvery serious  Please excuse my messy handwriting. excuse someone for (doing) something: I hope youll excuse us for leaving so early.
    24. 24. What is “Excusing”Someone/thing?2 [often passive] To give someone permission toleave  Now if youll excuse us, we have to get going. To give someone permission not to do something that they usually have to do  excuse someone from (doing) something:  Youre excused from doing the dishes tonight.
    25. 25. What is “Excusing”Someone/thing?3 To provide a reason or explanation forsomething bad that someone has done, in orderto make it seem less bad. Iknow hes over 70, but that doesnt excuse his sexist attitudes.
    26. 26. When Should I Excuse Myself? Reasons to “excuse” yourself:  You need to leave early or unexpectedly.  You need to take a phone call (while being with someone).  You said something you didn’t mean to and need to clarify.  You need to interrupt someone.  You need to attend to someone interrupting you.  You committed a social faux pas (unintentional blunder).
    27. 27. How Does One ExcuseOneself? Common Expressions:  “Excuse me”  “I beg your pardon”  “Pardon me”  “May I be excused?”  “I’m sorry”
    28. 28. Bringing it all together• Apologizing and excusing oneself are closely linked.• Additionally, it is often helpful to excuse oneself when interrupting someone.
    29. 29. Questions?