6. Women use communication as a
tool to enhance social connections
and create relationships
G R A C E
7. Men use communication to
achieve tangible outcomes
and establish power
G R I T
SOURCES: Leaper, 1991; Maltz & Borker, 1982; Wood, 1996; Mason, 1994
8. L E A D E R S H I P B E H A V I O R S
Results-Oriented
Visionary
Strategic
Empowering
Conflict Resilient
Listener
Decisive
Collaborative
Fearless
Communicator
12. Goal-Oriented
Power and Authority are Key
Find a Solution: Just Fix it
Relationship-Oriented
Maintaining a Connection is Key
Empathy and Understanding
D E C I S I V E N E S S
G R I T P E R S P E C T I V E G R A C E P E R S P E C T I V E
The first quality is grace. Skills that are needed for behaving in a polite way in social situations — great for building and maintaining relationships. More likely to be associated with women figures: Elegance or Beauty of Form, Manner, Motion, or Action
Synonyms: Pleasant, Charming, Graceful, Polite, Pleasing
Grit is great when you want to exert dominance and get your way. More likely to be associated with men. Firmness of Character; Indomitable Spirit.
Synonyms: Bold, Brave, Determined, Gutsy, Fearless, Resilient
Overall, women are expected to use communication to enhance social connections and relationships, while men use language to enhance social dominance. On average, women use more expressive, tentative, and polite language than men do, especially in situations of conflict (Basow & Rubenfield, 2003).
Men are viewed as more likely than women to offer solutions to problems in order to avoid further seemingly unnecessary discussions of interpersonal problems. Men tend to be self-assertive and view conversations as a means towards a tangible solution. Women, on the other hand, value cooperation, this communal orientation “involves a concern with others, selflessness, and a desire to be at one with others .
There is no known differences between men and women in terms of IQ and so visionary or strategic skills are more likely to be tied to dinvidiual strengths versus gender ones.
The West was also a place where men and women worked alongside one another as equal partners as a matter of necessity. A genuine economic partnership existed between husband and wife as every family member above toddler age needed to pitch in to ensure everyone ate, let alone their joint pursuits were a financial success. Western women honed their skills of balancing grit and grace. Consequently, traditional roles expanded naturally in the spirit of
What Robin did best was to embraced work and life – proudly, openly, honestly. The sad truth is this is really rare today. Somehow, we seem to believe that focusing on family will compromise work and vice-a-versa. Robin, along with Ester, the woman town council of Jackson, Nellie, Jill and I— we are all proof this is not the case. You can be very good at both – maybe better at both by NOT compromising either.
Leaders have not always had the courage to have grace — to be kind, caring, supportive, warm, strong, honest, real, vulnerable, trusted and trusting….
And I’m encouraging you to have the courage — of grace with grit ..
What a wonderful gift for all of us to give to Robin by continuing on in the way we live and work, as friends and confidants, supporters and resources for our close friends, our teams, our business partners and by teaching these positive and wonderful ways to those we mentor and by championing BOTH work and life, and grace WITH grit.
I’m asking you today to think about this blend. These are not new qualities, and I’m confident, that even if you didn’t grow up in the west that you have them inside.