This document discusses various aspects of negotiating with difficult people and resolving conflicts and disputes. It covers that businesses have business problems involving people rather than legal problems, and that injustices outside the law's purview are more common than those it addresses. It also discusses different types of justice, tactics used in negotiations, sources of conflict like scarce resources, and approaches to conflict resolution ranging from yielding to problem solving.

1. Negotiating with Difficult People Victoria Pynchon, ADR Services, Inc .

2. Businesses do not have legal problems Only lawyers have legal problems Businesses have business problems With People concerns And Justice Issues

3. Why do people seek the services of

5. Injustices that the law will rectify are dwarfed by the injustices it will not. We generally consider non-actionable injustices to be frivolous claims. The parties’ complaints almost always include non-actionable injustices which laws, rules, standards, best practices, policies, procedures, and even folkways cannot address. World of Injustice Injustices the law will remedy

6. Relative Benefits v. Absolute Numbers

7. distributive justice, or the perceived fairness of outcomes procedural justice, or the perceived fairness of the procedures by which outcomes are determined interactional justice, the perceived fairness of the nuances of interpersonal treatment.

8. We identify rights and responsibilities transform (nip, tuck, spin, frame, highlight, downplay, flatten) narratives of injustice into actionable causes of action monetize those injustices sharpen the differences between “our” story and our “opponent’s” story ask a third party (judge, arbitrator, jury) to choose a “side. Translate victories and defeats on the legal field of combat into a narrative our clients can understand

9. THE BASICS OF CONFLICT “Time is what keeps everything from happening at once” Stephen Hawking

10. Conflict is a Perceived divergence of interests or the belief that the current aspirations of the parties cannot be simultaneously met

11. Scarce Resources Contending Shirley Jackson’s “Lottery” Logan’s Run Strong survive/weak die Problem solving Hunting/gathering to agriculture/husbandry Farming/hunting to industry Industry to technology Material (steel, cars, trains, planes) to Immaterial (knowledge) “ Innovate, don’t litigate (contend)” Jonathan Schwartz, CEO Sun Microsystems

12. Persuasion Exercise Object of the game Get your partner to come over to your side of the line The winners will each will $1.00

13. Relative deprivation Injurious Event Perceptions Self interest/desire Other interest/desire Conflict’s Source Resources Values Dispute = Immediate Manifestation of Conflict Naming Blaming Claiming Tactics Yielding Avoiding Contending Problem Solving Tit for Tat Start nice Be Provokable Be Forgiving

14. Tactics Malcolm Gladwell, Outliers Yielding/Avoiding Negative for yielder Nothing changes for other in a blind approach for landing through clouds where the first officer is convinced that the plane is heading against solid mountain rock all he says is “I am not sure if we have established our gliding path with necessary precision”.

15. Contentious Tactics Ingratiation & gamesmanship Threat, promises & arguments Shaming Coercive Commitments Physical Violence Win-lose Resolution unstable

16. Malcolm Gladwell, Outliers Problem Solving Satisfies some of both parties’ interests Resolution is stable

17. End of Part I