With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
How do you navigate microaggressions - those words and actions that offend or hurt, even though they may be unintended? Learn some of the obstacles of authentic conversations, as well as practical strategies for what to do or say when you are the target of, witness to, and agents of microaggressions.
How do you navigate those "ouch" moments - those that offend or hurt, even though they may be unintended? Learn some of the obstacles of authentic conversations, as well as practical strategies for what to do or say when you are the target of ouch moments, witness to ouch moments, and agents of ouch moments.
WHAT I SAID AND WHAT I MEANT: IMPROVING CROSS-CULTURAL COMMUNICATIONS:
Humans communicate on many levels: spoken language, tone, body language, style and personality. The fact that we have complex cultural identities and a host of differing past experiences
increases the probability of cross-cultural miscommunications. This workshop presents major cross-cultural communication theories, ways that cultural values, power, privilege and differences affect the way we communicate, tools for questioning assumptions, and ways to improve cross-cultural communications skills.
Generic Inclusion in the Early Years: Why, What, How (Educators)Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Folk wisdom tells us young children don't notice differences or have any biases, yet research is telling us otherwise. What are age appropriate ways to develop intentionally inclusive and identity conscious children?
How do you navigate microaggressions - those words and actions that offend or hurt, even though they may be unintended? Learn some of the obstacles of authentic conversations, as well as practical strategies for what to do or say when you are the target of, witness to, and agents of microaggressions.
How do you navigate those "ouch" moments - those that offend or hurt, even though they may be unintended? Learn some of the obstacles of authentic conversations, as well as practical strategies for what to do or say when you are the target of ouch moments, witness to ouch moments, and agents of ouch moments.
WHAT I SAID AND WHAT I MEANT: IMPROVING CROSS-CULTURAL COMMUNICATIONS:
Humans communicate on many levels: spoken language, tone, body language, style and personality. The fact that we have complex cultural identities and a host of differing past experiences
increases the probability of cross-cultural miscommunications. This workshop presents major cross-cultural communication theories, ways that cultural values, power, privilege and differences affect the way we communicate, tools for questioning assumptions, and ways to improve cross-cultural communications skills.
Generic Inclusion in the Early Years: Why, What, How (Educators)Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Folk wisdom tells us young children don't notice differences or have any biases, yet research is telling us otherwise. What are age appropriate ways to develop intentionally inclusive and identity conscious children?
How do we learn about our various group identities like female, African American, Buddhist, homosexual, middle class, etc.? From whom do we learn the meaning of these terms? What messages have we internalized about ourselves and others? What are the differences that result in one person having a healthy self identity and another person experiencing own-group shame and hatred? Learn how we can co-author the identity development of youth to progress toward positive success for all.
As leaders of our institutions, we need to have strategic vision and global understanding to manage meaningful change. What demographic and philosophical changes make diversity and inclusion an imperative value added rather than a desired additive? What factors help us understand where the school is on the spectrum of exclusive clubs to inclusive organizations? How do we move our communities strategically at the pace that is right for the school? How do we sustain our positive growth over time? Discuss these questions and gather tools to help our schools become the leading edge of cultural competency, inclusion, and equity.
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
As leaders of our institutions, we need to have strategic vision and global understanding to manage meaningful change. What demographic and philosophical changes make diversity and inclusion an imperative value added rather than a desired additive? What factors help us understand where the school is on the spectrum of exclusive clubs to inclusive organizations? How do we move our communities strategically at the pace that is right for the school? What are some best practices for getting the right people to the school and leveraging their talents? How do we sustain our positive growth over time? Discuss these questions and gather tools to help our schools become the leading edge of cultural competency, inclusion, and equity.
Talking about topics like gender, race, sexual orientation, and class can raise anxiety for many people, and yet we must have the conversation in our schools and our lives in order to be more inclusive and change the world for the better. What are the fears and common pitfalls that keep us from broaching courageous conversations? Gain practical skills for responding to hurtful experiences and facilitating courageous conversations.
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
We want to create organizations that are inclusive and culturally competent toward all people no matter what their identities or backgrounds. Yet, we know that there are implicit and unconscious biases that gets in the way of our acting in congruence with our beliefs and values. Learn the science of cognitive biases we all have and what we can do to mitigate them.
How do we learn about our various group identities like female, African American, Buddhist, gay, middle class, etc.? From whom do we learn the meaning of these terms? What messages have we internalized about ourselves and others? What are the differences that result in one person having a healthy self identity and another person experiencing own-group shame and hatred? Learn how we can co-author the identity development of youth to progress toward positive success for all.
Inclusion in the Early Years: Why, What, How (Parents and Guardians)Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Folk wisdom tells us young children don't notice differences or have any biases, yet research is telling us otherwise. What are age appropriate ways to develop intentionally inclusive and identity conscious children?
Gone are days when boys are made of "snips and snails and puppy dog tails" and girls are made of "sugar and spice and everything nice"... or are they? Children are barraged with messages about gender and heterosexual norms everywhere they go - their homes, their schools, the media, and more. Do you know what hidden lessons they are learning? How do gender and sexuality affect everything from boys struggling in school to girls dropping out of the STEM pipeline, from sexual harassment to anti-gay bullying, from eating disorders to plastic surgery? How do parents, guardians, teachers, and schools provide safe environments for positive self esteem, healthy identity development, and acceptance of differences?
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
Everyone has something that can bother them, even if it doesn't bother anyone else. Everyone is also uplifted by different things. Learn about No Joke Zones (NJZs) and Pump Ups, identify your own, and communicate them with one another to become a better friend, classmate, and community member.
3.5 Hour Session with division leaders and DEI leaders of Spence School. Process for identifying strengths of existent programming and ideating improvements for a K-12 identity development scope and sequence.
Young people bear witness to challenging or traumatic events in current events, media, and our local communities. Their thoughts, feelings, and reactions affect them whether we introduce conversations or not. We adults have a natural instinct to protect our children from harsh realities and yet prepare them to navigate this complex world - is it possible to do both? What are ways to talk about identity, difference, and justice in age appropriate ways? How do you reinforce school values without shutting down perspectives? How do you facilitate authentic and respectful dialogue across difference? Engage in these questions and more through this interactive session.
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
How do we learn about our various group identities like female, African American, Buddhist, homosexual, middle class, etc.? From whom do we learn the meaning of these terms? What messages have we internalized about ourselves and others? What are the differences that result in one person having a healthy self identity and another person experiencing own-group shame and hatred? Learn how we can co-author the identity development of youth to progress toward positive success for all.
As leaders of our institutions, we need to have strategic vision and global understanding to manage meaningful change. What demographic and philosophical changes make diversity and inclusion an imperative value added rather than a desired additive? What factors help us understand where the school is on the spectrum of exclusive clubs to inclusive organizations? How do we move our communities strategically at the pace that is right for the school? How do we sustain our positive growth over time? Discuss these questions and gather tools to help our schools become the leading edge of cultural competency, inclusion, and equity.
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
As leaders of our institutions, we need to have strategic vision and global understanding to manage meaningful change. What demographic and philosophical changes make diversity and inclusion an imperative value added rather than a desired additive? What factors help us understand where the school is on the spectrum of exclusive clubs to inclusive organizations? How do we move our communities strategically at the pace that is right for the school? What are some best practices for getting the right people to the school and leveraging their talents? How do we sustain our positive growth over time? Discuss these questions and gather tools to help our schools become the leading edge of cultural competency, inclusion, and equity.
Talking about topics like gender, race, sexual orientation, and class can raise anxiety for many people, and yet we must have the conversation in our schools and our lives in order to be more inclusive and change the world for the better. What are the fears and common pitfalls that keep us from broaching courageous conversations? Gain practical skills for responding to hurtful experiences and facilitating courageous conversations.
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
We want to create organizations that are inclusive and culturally competent toward all people no matter what their identities or backgrounds. Yet, we know that there are implicit and unconscious biases that gets in the way of our acting in congruence with our beliefs and values. Learn the science of cognitive biases we all have and what we can do to mitigate them.
How do we learn about our various group identities like female, African American, Buddhist, gay, middle class, etc.? From whom do we learn the meaning of these terms? What messages have we internalized about ourselves and others? What are the differences that result in one person having a healthy self identity and another person experiencing own-group shame and hatred? Learn how we can co-author the identity development of youth to progress toward positive success for all.
Inclusion in the Early Years: Why, What, How (Parents and Guardians)Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Folk wisdom tells us young children don't notice differences or have any biases, yet research is telling us otherwise. What are age appropriate ways to develop intentionally inclusive and identity conscious children?
Gone are days when boys are made of "snips and snails and puppy dog tails" and girls are made of "sugar and spice and everything nice"... or are they? Children are barraged with messages about gender and heterosexual norms everywhere they go - their homes, their schools, the media, and more. Do you know what hidden lessons they are learning? How do gender and sexuality affect everything from boys struggling in school to girls dropping out of the STEM pipeline, from sexual harassment to anti-gay bullying, from eating disorders to plastic surgery? How do parents, guardians, teachers, and schools provide safe environments for positive self esteem, healthy identity development, and acceptance of differences?
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
In the ever-changing landscape of student demographics and diversity initiatives, teachers face the challenge of creating a classroom environment that goes beyond celebrations of heroes and holidays. Whether we are educators beginning the journey or far down the path into multiculturalism and inclusivity, there is always room to grow. What are some practical strategies and best practices to become the educator with whom all children thrive?
Everyone has something that can bother them, even if it doesn't bother anyone else. Everyone is also uplifted by different things. Learn about No Joke Zones (NJZs) and Pump Ups, identify your own, and communicate them with one another to become a better friend, classmate, and community member.
3.5 Hour Session with division leaders and DEI leaders of Spence School. Process for identifying strengths of existent programming and ideating improvements for a K-12 identity development scope and sequence.
Young people bear witness to challenging or traumatic events in current events, media, and our local communities. Their thoughts, feelings, and reactions affect them whether we introduce conversations or not. We adults have a natural instinct to protect our children from harsh realities and yet prepare them to navigate this complex world - is it possible to do both? What are ways to talk about identity, difference, and justice in age appropriate ways? How do you reinforce school values without shutting down perspectives? How do you facilitate authentic and respectful dialogue across difference? Engage in these questions and more through this interactive session.
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
Town School for Boys Conflict and Bullying Parents and GuardiansRosetta Eun Ryong Lee
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
2 Hour Session delivered to parents, guardians, and teachers at French Immersion School of Washington. With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
Odd Girls Out. Queen Bees. Girl Bullying. When did we lose our sweet little girls? Examine the cross-section of socio-emotional development, gender bias, and adolescence in the emergence of the “Mean Girl” phenomenon. What can we do as parents, educators, and supporters to promote healthy relationship among girls?
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
Watershed School Conflict, Bullying, Relationships, and CommunityRosetta Eun Ryong Lee
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
60 Minute session delivered to 3-5 grade students. What is conflict? How can you address it in a healthy way? What is bullying, and how is it different than conflict? How can you stop bullying?
Odd Girls Out. Queen Bees. Girl Bullying. When did we lose our sweet little girls? Examine the cross-section of socio-emotional development, gender bias, and adolescence in the emergence of the “Mean Girl” phenomenon. What can we do as parents, educators, and supporters to promote healthy relationship among girls?
60 minute session delivered to girls at elementary schools. Conflict is natural and normal, yet girls engage in much more Alternative Aggression. Why does it happen, what could it lead to, and what can we do to have healthy conflict resolution that the situation doesn’t turn into bullying?
90 Minute session delivered to 5-8 grade students. What is conflict? How can you address it in a healthy way? What is bullying, and how is it different than conflict? How can you stop bullying?
Odd Girls Out. Queen Bees. Girl Bullying. What's truth and what's myth? Discover why and how we engage in unhealthy conflict as girls and women, and - more importantly - learn tools for cultivating healthy relationships that include healthy conflict.
Odd Girls Out. Queen Bees. Girl Bullying.
Examine the cross-section of socio-emotional development, gender bias, and adolescence in the emergence of the “Mean Girl” phenomenon. What can we do to promote healthy relationship among girls and women?
Odd Girls Out. Queen Bees. Bullying. What's myth and what's reality? Examine the cross-section of socio-emotional development, gender bias, adolescence, and other factors in the emergence of the “Mean Girl” phenomenon. What can we do as parents, educators, and supporters to promote healthy relationship among all young people?
What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
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Session for parents and other caretakers. "It was only a joke." "I didn't realize what that meant." "My friend told me it was okay." Young people use derogatory language and perpetuate harmful stereotypes as they test boundaries, repeat what they hear in the media, attempt off color humor, and more. How do you navigate microaggressions - those words and actions that offend or hurt, even though they may be unintended? Learn some of the obstacles of authentic conversations, as well as practical strategies for when microaggressions happen. Discuss and practice how to “call in” privately, interrupt in the moment publicly, and receive interventions gracefully.
Folk wisdom tells us young children don't notice differences or have any biases, yet research is telling us otherwise. What are age appropriate ways to develop intentionally inclusive and identity conscious children? [This session addresses the developmental needs of children in grades K-8)
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In discussions of racial and ethnic diversity and equity, it is difficult to avoid juxtapositions between Asians and other People of Color groups. Higher test scores, college admissions, income, etc. imply that people of Asian and Pacific Islander heritage are doing better than everyone else, including Whites. And yet, this identity group contains within it a myriad of sub-groups that get lost in the conglomeration, and we fail to serve students if we don't acknowledge this diversity. API people experience the marginalization of invisibility - Southeast Asian, South Asian, and Pacific Islander peoples are often invisible in the equation of API with East Asian; API cultures are often invisible in the pedagogy of individual accomplishments and competition; API experiences are often invisible in conversations of racial opportunity gaps. From the impact of the Model Minority Myth to the Bamboo Ceiling, from the perpetual immigrant narrative to the rise of international API students in our residential programs, from the dance of identities of transracial adoptees to the intersectionality of factors that influence multiracial API identity development, are our schools prepared to be inclusive of all people who identify as Asian and Pacific Islander heritage?
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What are differences between friends and frenemies? Why do women and girls especially have them in our lives? Learn to have healthier friendships, draw firm boundaries when you need to, and practice for your future relationships.
What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
Beyond Sticks and Stones: Helping Youth Navigate Conflict and Bullying
With the heightened awareness of bullying in today's world, it's hard to know how to support our children. What is the difference between everyday conflict and bullying? How do boys and girls experience aggression differently? How do identifiers like sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, ability, and socioeconomic status affect aggression? Learn about different types of aggression and practical tools in responding to conflicts and bullying.
What are some ways we can approach differences so that everyone can share openly, feel "normal," and be valued for all their unique experiences and ways of being?
Don't yuck anybody's yum.
Don't call things weird - try to be curious.
Give things a try - you never know what is going to be awesome
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1. Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Seattle Girls’ School
Beyond Sticks and Stones:
Helping Youth Navigate Conflict and Bullying
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
3. Agenda
• Conflict versus Bullying
• Gender, Bias, Conflict, and Bullying
• Alternative Aggression
• What Can We Do?
• Questions
• Resources
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
4. Definition of Conflict
• A clash between two
individuals or groups
• A disagreement or
argument about
something important
• Etc.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
5. When It’s Bullying
• Power is uneven
• Intent to harm
• Repeated and
sustained
• Efforts to hide from
adults
• Advocacy not
changing behaviors
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
6. Types of Bullying Behavior:
and common characteristics of their perpetrators
• Traditional Bullying
• Clueless Bullying
• Bully-Victim Alternation
• Popular Bullying
• Being a “Facebook Thug”
The agent generally has less empathy,
patience, caring, and forgiveness for others.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
7. Common Characteristics or Behaviors of
Youth Who Are Bullied
• They are more sensitive, unhappy, cautious,
anxious, quiet and withdrawn than other youth.
• They are generally insecure and non-assertive, and
react by withdrawing when targeted by other students
(rather than retaliating or asserting).
• They exhibit sudden change in behaviors: showing
signs of depression, not eating, cutting, letting
themselves go, losing interest in favorite things,
quitting teams, etc.
• They may be embarrassed to admit being bullied.
They may blame themselves or feel guilty.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
12. Special Considerations for Girls
Sexy --- Slutty
Powerful --- Bitchy
Smart --- Bookish
Cheerful --- Uncool
Confident --- “All That”
Athletic --- Jocky
Close to Friends --- Lesbian
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
13. Special Considerations for Boys
Do Not Be Weak.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
Be so, and you will be likened to
a girl or you will be called gay.
14. Gender, Bias, Conflict, and
Bullying
• Source of Power
• Worst Labels
• Who Bullies?
• Who is Bullied?
• Social Collective
• Abuse and Aggression
• Outliers of Victims
• Signs of Cry
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
15. Direct Aggression
• Angry, Hurtful
Words
• Physical
Fights
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17. Relational Aggression includes acts that
“harm others through damage (or the
threat of damage) to relationships or
feelings of acceptance, friendship, or
group inclusion.”
Relational Aggression
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
18. Indirect Aggression allows the
perpetrator to avoid confronting the
target directly, making it seem as
though there is no intent to harm.
Indirect Aggression
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
19. Social Aggression
Social Aggression is intended
to damage self esteem or social
status within a group.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
20. Process Break
How are your young people
experiencing conflict and
bullying? What are the
greatest pressures facing
them? How do they currently
handle conflicts?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
21. So What? Now What?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
25. D.E.A.R. Self Advocacy
• Describe – Describe actions or words without
judgment.
• Explain – Explain the impact of those actions or
words.
• Affirm – Affirm the person or relationship. Assume
positive intent.
• Request – Request different actions, request an
apology, etc.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
27. V.O.M.P. Conflict Tool
• Voice – Each person has the opportunity to VOICE their feelings
and experience of the conflict using “I” statements. The other person
LISTENS before sharing their experience.
• Own – Each person takes ownership of their piece in the conflict.
“Here’s my contribution to the mess.”
• Mile – Each person “walks a mile” in the other person’s shoes
and tries to see the conflict from the other person’s perspective.
• Plan – Both people work together to make a plan for moving
forward. What can we do so this doesn’t happen again? What will we
do differently next time?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
29. Bullying Intervention
• Know when it is
bullying
• Stand up for
yourself
• Ask them to stop
the behavior
• Seek healthy
support
• Tell an adult
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
30. Empowering the Bystander
Many bullying programs center around
agents and targets. Why not address
the 60-70% who are bystanders?
• Keeps the focus away from blaming the
targets or agents.
• Cover backstage spaces where only kids
are allowed.
• Create a mass of empowered allies and
shift the balance of power
• Create a new path of least resistance.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
31. Ally Skills
• Don’t bully
• Speak up when someone else is being bullied
• Assume positive intentions, but don’t let that
assumption make you silent
• Ask questions to clarify and to educate
• Don’t make the person who is bullying into someone
who is getting targeted
• Actively include those who are easily left out
• If you know someone is getting bullied, tell an
adult at school or at home
• Keep the climate healthy
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
32. Teach Digital Citizenship
• No Digital Conflicts!
• The Face Test – would you say it to their face?
• The Headline Test – would you want it broadcast?
• The Digital Self – are you the same person online?
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33. Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
Instagram photo by talk2spirit
34. Advice for Schools
• Policy - A comprehensive anti-bullying policy that enumerates
sources of bias and that includes alternative aggression.
• Programming - Training for teachers and staff on bullying
and bias. Support for teachers and staff in acting to
combat bullying and bias. Self-esteem, conflict
management, and community building programs and
curricula for students.
• Practice - Consistent and meaningful follow-through in
dealing with acts of bullying and bias. Coverage of
unsupervised spaces where bullying occurs most.
• PEOPLE - Critical mass of people who are supportive AND
active on all levels.
• PECUNIARY- Resources – Time, people, money, etc.
EMPOWER THE BYSTANDERS!
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
35. Process Break
What do we already
have in place? What
could we do more of,
intentionally, or
differently?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
38. Resources
• Joshua M. Aronson, Ph.D., “Improving Achievement & Narrowing the Gap,”
Learning and the Brain Conference, Cambridge, MA, November 2003
• Roy Baumeister, Case Western Reserve University, Various Social
Psychology Experiments on the Effects of Social Exclusion
• Emily Bazelon, Sticks and Stones: Defeating the Culture of Bullying and
Rediscovering the Power of Character and Empathy.
• “Cycle of Bullying,” North Central Educational Service District,
http://www.ncesd.org/safe_civil/docs/resources/cycle_of_bullying.pdf
• Joe Feagin, “The Two Faced Racism.” White Privilege Conference.
Springfield, MA. April 2008.
• Kevin Jennings, GLSEN (Gay Lesbian and Straight Education Network)
www.glsen.org
• Allan G. Johnson, Privilege, Power, and Difference.
• Tara Kuther, “Understanding Bullying,” PTA.org,
http://www.pta.org/pr_magazine_article_details_1117637268750.html
• Michael Thompson & Kathy Schultz, “The Psychological Experiences of
Students of Color,” Independent School Magazine,
http://www.nais.org/publications/ismagazinearticle.cfm?Itemnumber=14430
7&sn.ItemNumber=145956&tn.ItemNumber=145958
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
39. Gender Specific Resources
• The Boy Game, short film and interactive website.
• JoAnn Deak, Ph.D., Girls Will Be Girls: Raising Confident and
Courageous Daughters
• Jackson Katz, Tough Guise
• Pooja Makhijani, Under Her Skin: How Girls Experience Race in
America.
• John Medina, Talaris Research Institute, various studies on early
gender differences in competition and play and “Love Lab.”
• Mary Pipher, Ph.D., Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent
Girls
• Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out, Odd Girl Speaks Out.
• Michael Thompson, Raising Cain.
• Rosalind Wiseman, Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your
Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends & Other Realities of
Adolescence
• Naomi Wolf, The Beauty Myth, Promiscuities.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
40. More Resources
• “101 Ways to Combat Prejudice.” Anti-Defamation League
http://www.adl.org/prejudice/default.asp
• Beatbullying Toolkit for Teachers,
http://www.beatbullying.org/images/teachers.pdf
• Hafner, Lauren. “Bullying Report: How are Washington State
Schools Doing?” Safe Schools Coalition. December 2003
http://www.safeschoolscoalition.org/bullyreport/bullyreport12-
03.html
• “House Bill Report - SHB 1444, Washington State” Bully Police
USA http://www.bullypolice.org/wa_law.html
• “Ten Ways to Fight Hate.” Teaching Tolerance
http://www.tolerance.org/10_ways/index.html
• “Washington State School Safety Center.” Office of
Superintendant of Public Education
http://www.k12.wa.us/SafetyCenter/HarassmentBullying/default
.aspx
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
41. Presenter Information
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
6th Faculty and
Professional Outreach
Seattle Girls’ School
2706 S Jackson Street
Seattle WA 98144
(206) 805-6562
rlee@seattlegirlsschool.org
http://tiny.cc/rosettalee
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)