The document is a transcript of a conversation with a successful investor reflecting on his career and struggles balancing success with acting on his values. He makes three key points:
1) Making compromises early in one's career to advance can change who you are over time, making it harder to act with integrity later on.
2) The higher he rose, the more limited and pressured he felt regarding his values due to increased competition, stakes, and pressure to conform.
3) He questions why behaving fairly and with civility doesn't ensure success, given talent and hard work, and why bad behavior isn't punished more. In the end, he defines success more broadly than just career achievements.
The aim of this lecture is to introduce and discuss social-psychological aspects of interpersonal relationships and, in particular, attraction, exclusion, and close relationships.
Family relationships and educational experiences during childhood play a crucial role in developing self-esteem, which is a confidence and satisfaction with oneself that is fundamental to identity. Parents and teachers can foster healthy self-esteem in children by expressing affection and support, helping the child set realistic goals, and avoiding imposing unreachably high standards, while low self-esteem can lead to an excessive craving for approval and affection as well as an extreme desire for personal achievement.
21 Warning Signs of Unhealthy Intimate RelationshipMoshe Ratson
Here are 21 warning signs of unhealthy dynamics in intimate relationships that can’t be ignored. It is not easy to accept the difficulties in your relationship, but the sooner you face reality, the sooner you can move forward and build healthy fulfilling and lasting relationship.
Peer pressure can influence students both positively and negatively. Positively, peers can encourage each other to read good books or be sportsmanlike. Negatively, peers may pressure each other to skip class or try cigarettes. Students are vulnerable to peer pressure due to basic human needs - the need to belong, feel worthwhile, and achieve. However, knowing one's true worth and purpose in God can free students from relying on peers and withstanding negative peer pressure. Preparing for uncomfortable situations and having strong values also helps students make good choices.
HUMAN RELATIONS- Principles of Interpersonal Leadership (A Group Report_Enver...Hazel Aguila
This document discusses the concept of win-win thinking and relationships. It defines win-win as seeking mutual benefit in all interactions where solutions benefit all parties. The document outlines six paradigms of human interaction, with win-win being the most ideal approach. It describes the five dimensions of win-win as character, relationships, agreements, supportive systems and processes. It provides details on each of these dimensions, emphasizing integrity, maturity, abundance mentality, trust and focusing on interests, not positions to achieve win-win solutions.
This document discusses factors that influence relationship formation and models of relational dynamics. It describes how appearance, similarity, complementarity, reciprocal attraction, competence, disclosure, proximity, and rewards all influence why people form relationships. It then outlines Mark Knapp's developmental model of relationships, which identifies 10 stages of relationships from initiating to terminating. The stages include experimenting, intensifying, integrating, bonding, differentiating, circumscribing, stagnating, avoiding, and terminating. Relationships are constantly changing and rarely stable for long periods as partners move through these stages.
The aim of this lecture is to introduce and discuss social-psychological aspects of interpersonal relationships and, in particular, attraction, exclusion, and close relationships.
Family relationships and educational experiences during childhood play a crucial role in developing self-esteem, which is a confidence and satisfaction with oneself that is fundamental to identity. Parents and teachers can foster healthy self-esteem in children by expressing affection and support, helping the child set realistic goals, and avoiding imposing unreachably high standards, while low self-esteem can lead to an excessive craving for approval and affection as well as an extreme desire for personal achievement.
21 Warning Signs of Unhealthy Intimate RelationshipMoshe Ratson
Here are 21 warning signs of unhealthy dynamics in intimate relationships that can’t be ignored. It is not easy to accept the difficulties in your relationship, but the sooner you face reality, the sooner you can move forward and build healthy fulfilling and lasting relationship.
Peer pressure can influence students both positively and negatively. Positively, peers can encourage each other to read good books or be sportsmanlike. Negatively, peers may pressure each other to skip class or try cigarettes. Students are vulnerable to peer pressure due to basic human needs - the need to belong, feel worthwhile, and achieve. However, knowing one's true worth and purpose in God can free students from relying on peers and withstanding negative peer pressure. Preparing for uncomfortable situations and having strong values also helps students make good choices.
HUMAN RELATIONS- Principles of Interpersonal Leadership (A Group Report_Enver...Hazel Aguila
This document discusses the concept of win-win thinking and relationships. It defines win-win as seeking mutual benefit in all interactions where solutions benefit all parties. The document outlines six paradigms of human interaction, with win-win being the most ideal approach. It describes the five dimensions of win-win as character, relationships, agreements, supportive systems and processes. It provides details on each of these dimensions, emphasizing integrity, maturity, abundance mentality, trust and focusing on interests, not positions to achieve win-win solutions.
This document discusses factors that influence relationship formation and models of relational dynamics. It describes how appearance, similarity, complementarity, reciprocal attraction, competence, disclosure, proximity, and rewards all influence why people form relationships. It then outlines Mark Knapp's developmental model of relationships, which identifies 10 stages of relationships from initiating to terminating. The stages include experimenting, intensifying, integrating, bonding, differentiating, circumscribing, stagnating, avoiding, and terminating. Relationships are constantly changing and rarely stable for long periods as partners move through these stages.
The document discusses how to develop strong self-esteem, which is important for success. Self-esteem allows you to believe in yourself and accomplish your goals. It prevents self-doubt and the belief that you lack the skills for success. While skills can be learned, self-esteem provides the foundation to do so. The benefits of self-esteem include empowerment, recognizing your own strengths, and having the confidence to achieve what you desire in life.
Self-esteem is the belief in one's own self-worth and competence. It is built over time through living consciously, accepting oneself unconditionally, taking responsibility for one's actions and choices, being assertive, living purposefully according to one's values, and behaving with integrity. Low self-esteem can result from negative core beliefs, shame, or acting against one's values. To increase self-esteem, one can challenge negative core beliefs, engage in purposeful action, learn from mistakes, forgive oneself, and focus on personal growth rather than past failures.
Self esteem and its impact on a person living with an invisible disability. Also includes conflict resolution styles and it's intersection with self esteem
The document outlines 7 basic ethics for winning respect, affection, and acceptance from others. These ethics are founded on having an attitude of gratitude, taking responsibility by apologizing, acknowledging the good in others, showing affection, being polite by saying please, greeting others warmly, and maintaining a positive appearance with a smile. Practicing these simple ethics allows people to connect with others on a fundamental level and experience positive changes in their relationships and lives.
This document outlines an agenda and materials for a workshop on improving self-esteem. The workshop objectives are to help participants identify factors influencing self-esteem, assess their own self-esteem, and determine what has undermined their positive self-perception. The agenda includes icebreakers, self-esteem assessments, video reflections, discussions of childhood experiences, relationships, abuse, and perfectionism and their impacts on self-esteem. Participants will learn ways to boost self-esteem through recognition, reducing self-criticism, positive self-talk, self-care, and patience.
This document contains discussion questions and prompts related to the topics of socialization, peer influence, and child development. It addresses Bronfenbrenner's ecological model, agents of socialization, the development of self-regulation skills, gender roles, and motivating children intrinsically. Teachers and students are prompted to discuss topics like how a child's environment shapes their development, the impact of technology and social media, parenting strategies to promote self-regulation, and guiding children's relationships with peers in a positive way.
Self-esteem is “the attitudinal, evaluative component of the self; the affective judgments placed on the self-concept consisting of feelings of worth and acceptance which are developed and maintained as a consequence of awareness of competence and feedback from the external world
self esteem actually assessment of our own self- self esteem is the opinion u have of yourself - hig self esteem based on our attitude - qualities of low self esteem - qualities of highself esteem - how exactly we improve our self esteem - appreciate yourself - facts abou t abraham lincoln - helen Keller - Thomas Edison
This document discusses self-awareness, self-perception, and public image. It explains that there are three types of self: how you see yourself (self-image), how others see you (public identity), and your true self (self-awareness). The aim is to get in touch with yourself, recognize your strengths and weaknesses, understand your social roles, and improve relationships through good character. Building character involves virtues like empathy, compassion, kindness, forgiveness, and civic engagement. Developing self-awareness can help align your self-image with how others actually see you.
The document discusses building self-esteem. It defines self-esteem as one's judgment of their own worth and capabilities. Self-esteem is learned from experiences and can change over time. Low self-esteem results from feeling incompetent in important areas of life and is characterized by behaviors like excessive bragging or blaming others. The foundation for happiness and success is having a positive self-view, which develops from unconditional love and acceptance as a child. Five feelings that build high self-esteem are security, self-knowledge, belonging, purpose, and competence. The document provides ideas to enhance these feelings in children.
Self-esteem is a measure of how much you feel worthy and love yourself. Individuals with high self-esteem feel good enough without excelling at everything, are not afraid to speak their mind or admit failures, and are not devastated by failure. Insecure individuals are sensitive to criticism, withdraw socially, and often feel jealous or envious of others. Factors affecting self-esteem include the attitudes of adults towards a growing child, emotionally disastrous experiences, the status of one's social group, and one's role within the group. Tips for improving self-esteem include maintaining good hygiene, facing fears and learning from failures, avoiding negative people and thoughts, and learning to appreciate yourself without worrying
The document discusses several theories related to how and why interpersonal relationships form, develop, and change over time:
1. Biological, cognitive, and social factors all contribute to initial attraction between partners. Hormones and proximity increase liking, while similarity in traits and values also draws people together.
2. For relationships to last, partners must perceive the relationship as fair or equitable. Unhappiness arises from imbalanced relationships where one feels under- or over-benefited.
3. Relationships continue when satisfaction is high, alternatives are low, and partners feel committed due to past investments. Over time, lack of rewards, high costs, alternatives, or low commitment can cause relationships to deteriorate or end
This document provides an overview of Alfred Adler's theory of individual psychology and personality disorders. It discusses Adler's background and key concepts such as inferiority complex, striving for superiority, birth order influences, and the three neurotic styles of life. The document also examines Adler's techniques in individual psychology therapy including establishing relationships, exploring dynamics, encouraging insight, and helping with reorientation. Finally, it discusses applications of Adler's approach and his contributions to understanding social interest, life goals, family influences, and cultural factors in personality development.
The Effect of Peer Pressure on Decision MakingBilhami
We are professionals in academic writing for all fields and levels of study. We have a team of professionals with relevant knowledge and experience suitable for writing top-notch assignments. With us, you also enjoy 24/7 customer support, delivery within deadlines and affordable rates. Do not hesitate to contact us.
Self-esteem is how a person values themselves and is influenced by relationships, physical self, work, hobbies, and life experiences. High self-esteem is associated with confidence, happiness, and success while low self-esteem leads to inhibition and vulnerability. Parents can promote their child's self-esteem by showing unconditional love, giving praise and encouragement, setting appropriate limits, and helping the child accept both successes and failures.
An overview of part of the OPRA Develop programme. Self-esteem is one of the non-negotiables to performing to the best of your ability. Nathaniel Branden's seminal work is as relevant today as it was when first released in the late 60's. We hope you enjoy this brief overview.
This document discusses building self-esteem and self-love. It states that loving yourself is important to loving others. Some ways to build self-esteem mentioned are finding role models, focusing on positives, setting and achieving goals, surrounding yourself with uplifting influences, and practicing positive self-talk. Comparing yourself to others and putting yourself down are identified as damaging to self-esteem.
Workshop Slides from a custom program that I put together for a few clients of mine. With 4-5 generations at work, each with distinct psychographics, there is bound to be more conflict than in the past. This workshop equips managers and leaders to manage this conflict more effectively.
American Family-Chapter 7: Self conceptbartlettfcs
The document discusses building self-esteem and having a positive self-concept. It provides tips for developing beliefs in one's abilities, such as focusing on strengths, setting achievable goals, and surrounding oneself with supportive influences. Comparing oneself negatively to others or putting oneself down are identified as damaging to self-esteem. Living in accordance with one's values and accepting both strengths and limitations can contribute to feeling good about oneself.
This document describes a dreamer who is a Pisces sun sign and Sagittarius moon sign. To stay grounded, she focuses on expressing herself through creative outlets like writing, dancing and drawing. She also values practicing self-care through activities like meditation, eating healthy and getting enough sleep. Her set of values that keep her grounded include being kind, creative, independent, having self-control and being strong internally while remaining sweet externally. These values help her navigate challenges and keep her centered on her goals.
This document discusses how defining and living by core organizational values can improve an organization. It outlines that core values can increase productivity, guide decision-making and boost employee morale. The webinar agenda covers what core values are, their advantages, why they fail, how to define them, how to live them, and includes case studies from companies like Zappos and HootSuite. The webinar advocates selecting a group to define the values, teaching and recognizing the values, and incorporating them into performance management.
The document discusses how to develop strong self-esteem, which is important for success. Self-esteem allows you to believe in yourself and accomplish your goals. It prevents self-doubt and the belief that you lack the skills for success. While skills can be learned, self-esteem provides the foundation to do so. The benefits of self-esteem include empowerment, recognizing your own strengths, and having the confidence to achieve what you desire in life.
Self-esteem is the belief in one's own self-worth and competence. It is built over time through living consciously, accepting oneself unconditionally, taking responsibility for one's actions and choices, being assertive, living purposefully according to one's values, and behaving with integrity. Low self-esteem can result from negative core beliefs, shame, or acting against one's values. To increase self-esteem, one can challenge negative core beliefs, engage in purposeful action, learn from mistakes, forgive oneself, and focus on personal growth rather than past failures.
Self esteem and its impact on a person living with an invisible disability. Also includes conflict resolution styles and it's intersection with self esteem
The document outlines 7 basic ethics for winning respect, affection, and acceptance from others. These ethics are founded on having an attitude of gratitude, taking responsibility by apologizing, acknowledging the good in others, showing affection, being polite by saying please, greeting others warmly, and maintaining a positive appearance with a smile. Practicing these simple ethics allows people to connect with others on a fundamental level and experience positive changes in their relationships and lives.
This document outlines an agenda and materials for a workshop on improving self-esteem. The workshop objectives are to help participants identify factors influencing self-esteem, assess their own self-esteem, and determine what has undermined their positive self-perception. The agenda includes icebreakers, self-esteem assessments, video reflections, discussions of childhood experiences, relationships, abuse, and perfectionism and their impacts on self-esteem. Participants will learn ways to boost self-esteem through recognition, reducing self-criticism, positive self-talk, self-care, and patience.
This document contains discussion questions and prompts related to the topics of socialization, peer influence, and child development. It addresses Bronfenbrenner's ecological model, agents of socialization, the development of self-regulation skills, gender roles, and motivating children intrinsically. Teachers and students are prompted to discuss topics like how a child's environment shapes their development, the impact of technology and social media, parenting strategies to promote self-regulation, and guiding children's relationships with peers in a positive way.
Self-esteem is “the attitudinal, evaluative component of the self; the affective judgments placed on the self-concept consisting of feelings of worth and acceptance which are developed and maintained as a consequence of awareness of competence and feedback from the external world
self esteem actually assessment of our own self- self esteem is the opinion u have of yourself - hig self esteem based on our attitude - qualities of low self esteem - qualities of highself esteem - how exactly we improve our self esteem - appreciate yourself - facts abou t abraham lincoln - helen Keller - Thomas Edison
This document discusses self-awareness, self-perception, and public image. It explains that there are three types of self: how you see yourself (self-image), how others see you (public identity), and your true self (self-awareness). The aim is to get in touch with yourself, recognize your strengths and weaknesses, understand your social roles, and improve relationships through good character. Building character involves virtues like empathy, compassion, kindness, forgiveness, and civic engagement. Developing self-awareness can help align your self-image with how others actually see you.
The document discusses building self-esteem. It defines self-esteem as one's judgment of their own worth and capabilities. Self-esteem is learned from experiences and can change over time. Low self-esteem results from feeling incompetent in important areas of life and is characterized by behaviors like excessive bragging or blaming others. The foundation for happiness and success is having a positive self-view, which develops from unconditional love and acceptance as a child. Five feelings that build high self-esteem are security, self-knowledge, belonging, purpose, and competence. The document provides ideas to enhance these feelings in children.
Self-esteem is a measure of how much you feel worthy and love yourself. Individuals with high self-esteem feel good enough without excelling at everything, are not afraid to speak their mind or admit failures, and are not devastated by failure. Insecure individuals are sensitive to criticism, withdraw socially, and often feel jealous or envious of others. Factors affecting self-esteem include the attitudes of adults towards a growing child, emotionally disastrous experiences, the status of one's social group, and one's role within the group. Tips for improving self-esteem include maintaining good hygiene, facing fears and learning from failures, avoiding negative people and thoughts, and learning to appreciate yourself without worrying
The document discusses several theories related to how and why interpersonal relationships form, develop, and change over time:
1. Biological, cognitive, and social factors all contribute to initial attraction between partners. Hormones and proximity increase liking, while similarity in traits and values also draws people together.
2. For relationships to last, partners must perceive the relationship as fair or equitable. Unhappiness arises from imbalanced relationships where one feels under- or over-benefited.
3. Relationships continue when satisfaction is high, alternatives are low, and partners feel committed due to past investments. Over time, lack of rewards, high costs, alternatives, or low commitment can cause relationships to deteriorate or end
This document provides an overview of Alfred Adler's theory of individual psychology and personality disorders. It discusses Adler's background and key concepts such as inferiority complex, striving for superiority, birth order influences, and the three neurotic styles of life. The document also examines Adler's techniques in individual psychology therapy including establishing relationships, exploring dynamics, encouraging insight, and helping with reorientation. Finally, it discusses applications of Adler's approach and his contributions to understanding social interest, life goals, family influences, and cultural factors in personality development.
The Effect of Peer Pressure on Decision MakingBilhami
We are professionals in academic writing for all fields and levels of study. We have a team of professionals with relevant knowledge and experience suitable for writing top-notch assignments. With us, you also enjoy 24/7 customer support, delivery within deadlines and affordable rates. Do not hesitate to contact us.
Self-esteem is how a person values themselves and is influenced by relationships, physical self, work, hobbies, and life experiences. High self-esteem is associated with confidence, happiness, and success while low self-esteem leads to inhibition and vulnerability. Parents can promote their child's self-esteem by showing unconditional love, giving praise and encouragement, setting appropriate limits, and helping the child accept both successes and failures.
An overview of part of the OPRA Develop programme. Self-esteem is one of the non-negotiables to performing to the best of your ability. Nathaniel Branden's seminal work is as relevant today as it was when first released in the late 60's. We hope you enjoy this brief overview.
This document discusses building self-esteem and self-love. It states that loving yourself is important to loving others. Some ways to build self-esteem mentioned are finding role models, focusing on positives, setting and achieving goals, surrounding yourself with uplifting influences, and practicing positive self-talk. Comparing yourself to others and putting yourself down are identified as damaging to self-esteem.
Workshop Slides from a custom program that I put together for a few clients of mine. With 4-5 generations at work, each with distinct psychographics, there is bound to be more conflict than in the past. This workshop equips managers and leaders to manage this conflict more effectively.
American Family-Chapter 7: Self conceptbartlettfcs
The document discusses building self-esteem and having a positive self-concept. It provides tips for developing beliefs in one's abilities, such as focusing on strengths, setting achievable goals, and surrounding oneself with supportive influences. Comparing oneself negatively to others or putting oneself down are identified as damaging to self-esteem. Living in accordance with one's values and accepting both strengths and limitations can contribute to feeling good about oneself.
This document describes a dreamer who is a Pisces sun sign and Sagittarius moon sign. To stay grounded, she focuses on expressing herself through creative outlets like writing, dancing and drawing. She also values practicing self-care through activities like meditation, eating healthy and getting enough sleep. Her set of values that keep her grounded include being kind, creative, independent, having self-control and being strong internally while remaining sweet externally. These values help her navigate challenges and keep her centered on her goals.
This document discusses how defining and living by core organizational values can improve an organization. It outlines that core values can increase productivity, guide decision-making and boost employee morale. The webinar agenda covers what core values are, their advantages, why they fail, how to define them, how to live them, and includes case studies from companies like Zappos and HootSuite. The webinar advocates selecting a group to define the values, teaching and recognizing the values, and incorporating them into performance management.
The document discusses MAANZ International, a nonprofit marketing institute led by CEO Brian Monger. It focuses on developing organizational strategy through mission, vision, and core value statements. Specifically, it provides three key points: 1) MAANZ International offers professional memberships, marketing courses, and publications to support marketers; 2) Strategy development should begin with a clear mission and vision, though many organizations' statements lack inspiration; 3) Core values reflect an organization's deeply held principles and need to be stated inspirationally.
Thank you for sharing your inspirational thoughts. Setting goals and having a plan to achieve them is important for success. While the path may not always be clear, having courage, perseverance and drawing on our inner strength can help us overcome challenges along the way.
This document discusses core values in nursing care. It defines core values as the values put on one's work, clients, and self that guide care and living. Core values in caring encompass empathy, respecting clients' rights and privacy, and treating each client as an individual. The document also discusses barriers to care like discrimination and poverty. It emphasizes the importance of considering each client's holistic needs and using nursing models to understand the whole person.
You need to listen carefully for clues that your organization has failed to engage in a deep examination of the company’s core values. If you sense this, or inherit a listless organization, resolve to do something about it right away. Nothing is more important if you want to build a leadership culture.
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Tired of chasing down expiring contracts and drowning in paperwork? Mastering contract management can significantly enhance your business efficiency and productivity. This guide unveils expert secrets to streamline your contract management process. Learn how to save time, minimize risk, and achieve effortless contract management.
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Enhancing Adoption of AI in Agri-food: IntroductionCor Verdouw
Introduction to the Panel on: Pathways and Challenges: AI-Driven Technology in Agri-Food, AI4Food, University of Guelph
“Enhancing Adoption of AI in Agri-food: a Path Forward”, 18 June 2024
AI Transformation Playbook: Thinking AI-First for Your BusinessArijit Dutta
I dive into how businesses can stay competitive by integrating AI into their core processes. From identifying the right approach to building collaborative teams and recognizing common pitfalls, this guide has got you covered. AI transformation is a journey, and this playbook is here to help you navigate it successfully.
𝐔𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐢𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐮𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐄𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐲 𝐄𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐄𝐖𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐃𝐄’𝐬 𝐋𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐎𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬
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The Most Inspiring Entrepreneurs to Follow in 2024.pdfthesiliconleaders
In a world where the potential of youth innovation remains vastly untouched, there emerges a guiding light in the form of Norm Goldstein, the Founder and CEO of EduNetwork Partners. His dedication to this cause has earned him recognition as a Congressional Leadership Award recipient.
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NIMA2024 | De toegevoegde waarde van DEI en ESG in campagnes | Nathalie Lam |...BBPMedia1
Nathalie zal delen hoe DEI en ESG een fundamentele rol kunnen spelen in je merkstrategie en je de juiste aansluiting kan creëren met je doelgroep. Door middel van voorbeelden en simpele handvatten toont ze hoe dit in jouw organisatie toegepast kan worden.
6.01. a personal_struggle_with_the_definition_of_success.stud.9.2008.last
1. This material is part of the Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection, a collaboration between the Aspen Institute
(www.AspenCBE.org) and The Yale School of Management. The Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection is in the Pilot
Phase of development; do not distribute/reproduce without permission.
1
Mary C. Gentile, PhD As of 9.2008
Director
Giving Voice to Values
GGiivviinngg VVooiiccee ttoo VVaalluueess
A PERSONAL STRUGGLE WITH THE DEFINITION OF SUCCESS
1
Conversation with a successful investor/partner in a private equity firm:
In my experience, conversations about ethics in business often ring false, especially in
educational contexts. It’s difficult to get to a real level of honesty.
I see business leaders taking public stands on various values-based issues, like
organizational diversity or the treatment of employees or transparency or the refusal to
take bribes. But most people, especially early in their careers, are not in a position to
drive organizational changes.
There is a big distinction between making the courageous and correct moral decision for
oneself, and being in a position to implement something systemic throughout the
organization. And even making the “right” moral decision for oneself can often feel like a
career limiting move if the wider organization doesn’t seem to value that choice.
In order for the organization to change, someone at a senior level has to care about the
issues. So people often think to themselves, I will make compromises early in my career
in order to make it up the ladder, and then I will take action based on my values when I
am in a powerful leadership position and can really make a difference. The problem with
“waiting it out” in this way is that all those compromises can change you. Generally if
you behaved a certain way to get to your position - whether actively inappropriate or
passively looking the other way - that is who you are or who you have become (despite
whatever personal narrative you have invented to justify your choices along the way).
1
This case was inspired by interviews and observations of actual experiences but names and other situational details
have been changed for confidentiality and teaching purposes.
2. This material is part of the Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection, a collaboration between the Aspen Institute
(www.AspenCBE.org) and The Yale School of Management. The Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection is in the Pilot
Phase of development; do not distribute/reproduce without permission.
2
When I have faced highly political behavior that conflicts with my own values, I have
generally chosen not to play. Don’t misunderstand; I’m not an altar boy, and I have made
my share of mistakes in treating peers and team members badly or being dishonest in deal
negotiations. But my best decisions about organizational politics and mudslinging have
not really felt like choices to me at all, because I’m just being who I am. It’s important to
realize that these choices do not necessarily lead to “movie endings;” I have paid a price
in career success and money (and honestly, the sacrifice hasn’t always felt “good” just
because I did the “right” thing). But as I said, there are some things I just was not willing
to do.
Another thing I’ve noticed is that, contrary to the aforementioned rationalization that “I
will be freer to act on my values when I’m more senior in the organization,” the higher
I’ve gone in my career, the more limited and pressured I often feel with regard to my
values. The competition gets tougher (because the people remaining in the game are less
likely to have the most pristine values or integrity) and we all get more sophisticated
about how to play and survive. Most importantly, the stakes get higher and there seems to
be more to lose – personally in terms of family responsibility and ego and financial
success as well as professionally in terms of platform and position – all of which makes it
harder to be courageous.
And I suspect people get better at marketing themselves the higher they go in an
organization, so they can defend more types of behavior. Then when they finally rise
high enough to run the show, they talk about values, but everyone knows the path they
took, and they rarely make those values the cornerstone of success for the next generation
of employees.
I guess it’s important to say that these generalizations may not be true in every company
or industry and also that entrepreneurs may have more ability at an early age to make the
right decision – but even these organizations or entrepreneurs have to answer to investors
or markets who don’t really care about values or at least don’t make their investment
decisions based on values.
An example:
A number of years ago, I built a new area of investments that eventually became an over
$1 billion portion of our $2 billion private equity fund. I was relatively young for the
level of responsibility I held and I found one of my new peers within the firm to be a
highly successful, older and, in my view, rather cynical partner. This partner’s approach
to colleagues as well as competitors was hostile and manipulative, and I figured that he
would eventually blow himself up because of the enemies he made. I tried to ignore him
and stay out of his way, knowing that he probably saw me as a threat since I had made it
to the same level at such a young age. I tried to help the guy when I could, thinking
maybe I could generate good will by being a team player (or at least distinguish my
behavior from his).
3. This material is part of the Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection, a collaboration between the Aspen Institute
(www.AspenCBE.org) and The Yale School of Management. The Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection is in the Pilot
Phase of development; do not distribute/reproduce without permission.
3
But I was wrong about everything. Over time, this guy did not blow himself up (He was a
talented investor and a good manipulator, and his investment track record allowed him a
free behavioral pass from his superiors.) and he found ways to push my buttons and to
call attention to any possible mistakes I made. He made the environment intolerable for
me. I found myself making angry speeches to the CEO in the shower in the mornings,
calling for him to rein in this partner. But in the end, I knew that everyone already knew
this guy was behaving badly and my complaints about him would not be news. People
just accepted the partner’s bad behavior because he was talented. And the only way I
could change the situation would be to fight at his level, using political tricks or slander
to turn folks against him. I just didn’t want to go there.
It didn’t even feel like a moral or values-based decision; it was just not who I was or the
way I wanted to lead my life. Eventually I left the firm and I lost a lot by doing so. Yes,
my career has continued to be successful, but not as successful as his in the American
definition of the term. I still look back at that experience with discomfort. If I had known
what I know now, I would have left sooner because I was angry and miserable for a long
time. I just couldn’t bring myself to believe that the situation couldn’t work out
differently. I just found it hard to accept that talented but bad people can, in fact, “win” in
such situations. Is that OK? I am still ambivalent about it. I don’t think I would have
admitted it at the time, but my decision to leave once I knew the situation wouldn’t
change was delayed somewhat by the high compensation – so I did allow myself to be
bought up to a point.
So you may ask: why am I still uncomfortable? Clearly I have continued to be successful
in my career. That partner didn’t ruin me and what’s more, he didn’t change me. I was
true to myself, even if it took some time, and I didn’t hurt anybody else. So what’s the
problem?
I’d like to say I feel better because I took the high moral ground but in reality, it didn’t
feel like a choice. It would not have been “me.” So the question becomes, why doesn’t
being the kind of person who behaves fairly and with civility ensure success, given the
requisite talent and hard work and commitment? Or, on the other hand, why doesn’t bad
behavior ensure failure?
I’d like to be able to embrace the classical definitions of success, accepting that true
success is not necessarily about “winning” or financial success or always being
recognized and rewarded. I’d like to be able to embrace the idea that true success is more
an internal than external phenomenon. But these ideas often seem overwhelmed by real
world evidence: they contradict the lessons we learn and the messages we digest every
day in school, the media, our communities, about how society measures success. It’s
difficult for your typical hard-charging, Type A individual to accept that it’s OK to make
career-limiting decisions in order to maintain one’s values.
On the other hand, I look at students and young managers today and am inspired by their
instinctive interest in social entrepreneurship, socially responsible investing, and their
4. This material is part of the Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection, a collaboration between the Aspen Institute
(www.AspenCBE.org) and The Yale School of Management. The Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection is in the Pilot
Phase of development; do not distribute/reproduce without permission.
4
desire to live balanced lives. It feels kind of schizophrenic: there is clearly a yearning
for change by so many individuals, but it is hard to create systemic change at a pace that
will actually impact our own careers and lives.
For me, I have begun to think that the only way to deal with the frustration and
ambivalence of these apparently contradictory messages is to put the idea of success and
achievement into the larger context of meaning in one’s entire life. Work success is not
enough; it’s just part of a person.
Still, it is important to be honest about my being able to make this choice. It is easier for
someone who has made a lot of money – whether it is $5 or $10 million, or $100 million
– to make these decisions to redefine success than it is when you don’t have the same
level of security.
So I have begun to take the very challenges that concerned me in my own career and to
work with colleagues who share my views, to take the very market system we have
studied and mastered in our careers and to consider ways to use its strengths to support
values-based organizations. The question I am working on now is: what kinds of changes
may be necessary – at the systemic, organizational and personal levels – to support those
who want to succeed in business and still be consistent with their values? And how can I
play a leadership role in supporting those changes? How can we make the values-
based choice a real, honest, viable ALTERNATIVE for the next generation of
ambitious workers?
Discussion Questions:
• What do you think of this speaker’s view that “The problem with ‘waiting it out’ in this
way is that all those compromises can change you.”? Do you agree? What are the
implications of this perspective for you?
• What do you think of his view that “The higher I’ve gone in my career, the more limited
and pressured I often feel with regard to my values.”? Do you agree? What are the
implications of this perspective for you?
• On the other hand, the speaker also describes how difficult it is for someone to be
consistent with their values when they are not at the “top” of their organizations.
Nevertheless, he then goes on to describe how he still managed to do so. What do you
make of this seeming contradiction? And what do you think enabled him to make the
choices he has?
• Why was it so difficult for the speaker to accept that someone can behave badly and still
be rewarded within an organization?
5. This material is part of the Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection, a collaboration between the Aspen Institute
(www.AspenCBE.org) and The Yale School of Management. The Giving Voice to Values curriculum collection is in the Pilot
Phase of development; do not distribute/reproduce without permission.
5
• How do you think the speaker defines success? Do you think his definition of success has
changed over the course of his career?
• The speaker explains that although he acted on his values, he does not want to pretend
that there wasn’t a price he paid for doing so. Why do you think it is important for him to
acknowledge that?
• Why do you think he is working on the venture he mentions at the end of his
conversation? What has he learned? What is he still trying to work out?
• What are the most important lessons that you personally can derive from the speaker’s
reflections? How will you define success?
(Alternatively, do you react to the speaker’s reflections by feeling positive and
empowered? If so, how? Or do you react to his reflections by feeling a bit stymied in
your efforts to voice and act on your values in the workplace? If so, what would it take
for you to transform that response?)
• And, finally, how would you respond to the questions the speaker poses at the end of his
remarks?