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Welcome
Jonathan “JJ” Jarrell
Influence Connecting increases your
influence in every situation
Principle #1
Connecting
Principles
5
1 Vision
2 Pragmatism
3 Consensus Building
4 Charisma
5 Trustworthiness
Successful US
Presidents exhibit 5
qualities
4 of the 5 skills to being
a successful leader have
to do with connecting
2 Pragmatism
Most people
who disconnect
aren’t aware
Connecting
Principles
5
Connecting Signals
Extra Effort
People go the
extra mile
Unsolicited
Appreciation
People say
positive things
Unguarded
Openness
People
demonstrate trust
Increased
Communica-
tion
People express
themselves more
readily
Enjoyable
Experiences
People feel good
about what they
are doing
Emotional
Bondedness
People display
a connection on
an emotional
level
Positive
Energy
People’s
emotional
“batteries” are
charged by
being together
Growing
Synergy
People’s
effectiveness is
greater than the
sum of the
contributions
Unconditional
Love
People are
accepting
without
reservation
Influence
Connecting
Principles
5
Influence
Jay Hall
PhD, Teleometrics, conducted
a study on the performance of
16,000 executives
Conclusion
Direct correlation
between
achievement and
the ability to care
for and connect
with people
Influence
Connecting
Principles
5
Care about
People as well as
Profits
Concentrate
on Production
Preoccupied with
their own Security
View subordinates
Optimistically
Focus more on
their own Status
Show a basic
Distrust of
subordinates
Seek advice from
those under them
Reluctant to seek
advice from those
under them
Do not seek
advice
Actively listen
Listen only to
superiors
Avoid
communication
and rely on policy
manuals
High
Achievers
Average
Achievers
Low
Achievers
Others
Connecting
Principles
Connecting is all about
OTHERS and not ourselves
Principle #2
1 Immaturity
Maturity is the ability to see and
act on behalf of others
2 Ego
3 Failure to value everyone
1 Do you CARE for me?
2 Can you HELP me?
3 Can I TRUST you?
Why do we focus on
ourselves and not others?
Connecting Questions
>90% of the impression that we often convey
has nothing to do with what we actually say!
Words
Tone of
Voice
Body
Language
Communication
Connecting
Principles
Connecting goes
beyond words
Principle #3
What
We say
7%
The
way
we say
38%
What
Others
55%
Components to
Face-to-Face communication
3
How others believe what we say
when we communicate
Communication
Connecting
Principles
3 Components to
communication
Communication
Dispassionate
Theoretical
Unfounded
Hypocritical
Presumptuous
Mechanical
I know this
I know this
I do not
know this
I feel this
I feel this
I do this
I do this
I do not
know this
I do not
feel this
I do not
feel this
I do not
do this
I do not
do this
Breakdown
Thought –
knowing
Emotion –
feeling
Action -
doing
Connecting
Principles
Communication Breakdowns
Communication
Connecting
Principles
Something we do;
connecting visually;
what people see
Something we know;
connecting intellectually;
what people understand
Something we feel;
connecting emotionally;
what people feel
Energy
Connecting
Principles
Connecting always
requires Energy
Principle #4
Unpardonable sins of a communicator4
Unprepared Uncommitted Uninteresting Uncomfortable
3 of the 4 require a lot of effort and energy
Connecting requires
1 Initiative – Go first!
2 Clarity – Prepare
3 Patience – Slow down
4 Selflessness – Give
5 Stamina – Recharge
Successful
Connecting
Skill
Connecting
Principles
Connecting is more skill
than natural talent
Principle # 5
What you
can do
Who you
know
How
you live
What you
know
What you
have done
Common groundConnectors connect on
common ground
Principle #1
Connecting
Practices
5
IndifferenceControlArroganceAssumption
Barriers
to finding
common
ground
Common ground
Connecting
Practices
5
Choices to finding
common ground
Availability Listening
Questions
Thought-
fulness
Openness Likeability
Humility Adaptability
Art of
Simplicity
1
Simplicity
Connecting
Practices
Connectors do the difficult work
of keeping it simple
Principle #2
4
Components to connect
through communication
Humor Heart Hope Help
S
Three
Keep it
Simple
Say it
Slowly
Have a
Smile
Talk to people, not above them
Get to the point2
Say it over and over and over again3
Say it clearly4
Say less5
Experience
Connecting
Practices
Create an experience
everyone enjoys
Principle #3
Take responsibility for your listeners1
Communicate in their world2
Capture people’s
attention from the start
3
Say it so it sticks4
Inspiration
Inspire
Connecting
Practices
Connectors Inspire people
Principle #4
Inspiration Equation
What People
know
What People
see
What People
feel
What
do people
need to know?
• That you understa-
nd them and are
focused on them
• That you have high
expectations of
them
What
do people
need to see?
• Your conviction
• Your example
What
do people
need to feel?
• Your confidence in
yourself and them
• Your gratitude for
them
Credibility
Connecting
Practices
Credibility is the currency
that connectors have
Principle #5
Thank you

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Everyone communicates few_connect_jj

  • 2. Influence Connecting increases your influence in every situation Principle #1 Connecting Principles 5 1 Vision 2 Pragmatism 3 Consensus Building 4 Charisma 5 Trustworthiness Successful US Presidents exhibit 5 qualities 4 of the 5 skills to being a successful leader have to do with connecting 2 Pragmatism
  • 3. Most people who disconnect aren’t aware Connecting Principles 5 Connecting Signals Extra Effort People go the extra mile Unsolicited Appreciation People say positive things Unguarded Openness People demonstrate trust Increased Communica- tion People express themselves more readily Enjoyable Experiences People feel good about what they are doing Emotional Bondedness People display a connection on an emotional level Positive Energy People’s emotional “batteries” are charged by being together Growing Synergy People’s effectiveness is greater than the sum of the contributions Unconditional Love People are accepting without reservation Influence
  • 4. Connecting Principles 5 Influence Jay Hall PhD, Teleometrics, conducted a study on the performance of 16,000 executives Conclusion Direct correlation between achievement and the ability to care for and connect with people
  • 5. Influence Connecting Principles 5 Care about People as well as Profits Concentrate on Production Preoccupied with their own Security View subordinates Optimistically Focus more on their own Status Show a basic Distrust of subordinates Seek advice from those under them Reluctant to seek advice from those under them Do not seek advice Actively listen Listen only to superiors Avoid communication and rely on policy manuals High Achievers Average Achievers Low Achievers
  • 6. Others Connecting Principles Connecting is all about OTHERS and not ourselves Principle #2 1 Immaturity Maturity is the ability to see and act on behalf of others 2 Ego 3 Failure to value everyone 1 Do you CARE for me? 2 Can you HELP me? 3 Can I TRUST you? Why do we focus on ourselves and not others? Connecting Questions
  • 7. >90% of the impression that we often convey has nothing to do with what we actually say! Words Tone of Voice Body Language Communication Connecting Principles Connecting goes beyond words Principle #3 What We say 7% The way we say 38% What Others 55% Components to Face-to-Face communication 3 How others believe what we say when we communicate
  • 9. Communication Dispassionate Theoretical Unfounded Hypocritical Presumptuous Mechanical I know this I know this I do not know this I feel this I feel this I do this I do this I do not know this I do not feel this I do not feel this I do not do this I do not do this Breakdown Thought – knowing Emotion – feeling Action - doing Connecting Principles Communication Breakdowns
  • 10. Communication Connecting Principles Something we do; connecting visually; what people see Something we know; connecting intellectually; what people understand Something we feel; connecting emotionally; what people feel
  • 11. Energy Connecting Principles Connecting always requires Energy Principle #4 Unpardonable sins of a communicator4 Unprepared Uncommitted Uninteresting Uncomfortable 3 of the 4 require a lot of effort and energy Connecting requires 1 Initiative – Go first! 2 Clarity – Prepare 3 Patience – Slow down 4 Selflessness – Give 5 Stamina – Recharge
  • 12. Successful Connecting Skill Connecting Principles Connecting is more skill than natural talent Principle # 5 What you can do Who you know How you live What you know What you have done
  • 13. Common groundConnectors connect on common ground Principle #1 Connecting Practices 5 IndifferenceControlArroganceAssumption Barriers to finding common ground
  • 14. Common ground Connecting Practices 5 Choices to finding common ground Availability Listening Questions Thought- fulness Openness Likeability Humility Adaptability
  • 15. Art of Simplicity 1 Simplicity Connecting Practices Connectors do the difficult work of keeping it simple Principle #2 4 Components to connect through communication Humor Heart Hope Help S Three Keep it Simple Say it Slowly Have a Smile Talk to people, not above them Get to the point2 Say it over and over and over again3 Say it clearly4 Say less5
  • 16. Experience Connecting Practices Create an experience everyone enjoys Principle #3 Take responsibility for your listeners1 Communicate in their world2 Capture people’s attention from the start 3 Say it so it sticks4
  • 17. Inspiration Inspire Connecting Practices Connectors Inspire people Principle #4 Inspiration Equation What People know What People see What People feel What do people need to know? • That you understa- nd them and are focused on them • That you have high expectations of them What do people need to see? • Your conviction • Your example What do people need to feel? • Your confidence in yourself and them • Your gratitude for them
  • 18. Credibility Connecting Practices Credibility is the currency that connectors have Principle #5