http://mindpersuasion.com/' Most guys think of dating as something they need to do, or have, and then they can get on with their lives. Is this really even possible? Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/

2. What's the difference between a
process and an outcome?

3. One way to describe them is that the
process is a way to get an outcome.

4. Or you may say that a process is made
of many, many outcomes that lead to a
greater outcome.

5. Or you may say that a process is a
consistently evolving system based on
tons of interdependent variables and
feedback loops. An outcome is an
event in time or a thing.

6. Take rain and the weather, for
example.

7. The weather is always changing,
always in flux, and always feeding back
into itself.

8. The amount of variables are few, and
are inorganic.

9. Pressure, wind speed, heat, humidity,
that's about it.

10. The outcome is the weather event.

11. Rain, snow hail, whatever. Of course,
each event, if you drill down into the
time span is a process unto itself.

12. The process of rain can cause all kinds
of events, or outcomes.

13. And in turn, they themselves are
processes that create outcomes.

14. The weather is the process that
creates an outcome of rain.

15. Rain is a process that creates an
outcome of wet soil.

16. We soil is a process that leads to
mature corn.

17. Mature corn is a process than turns
into popcorn.

18. And and on.

19. In reality, there's not a hard limit
between any process, and any
outcome.

20. It all depends on your frame of
reference.

21. One life long process that many guys
treat as an outcome is male and
female interactions.

22. Even within a relationship, a happy
committed relationship, the process is
ALWAYS changing.

23. The needs, wants, desires, subjective
beliefs and values of each person are
ALWAYS changing.

24. Once you get past that lovey dovey
super sex part, a real relationship takes
a ton of work.

25. Real work, not just check-the-boxes-
off-a-list work.

26. That's why so many relationships fail.

27. Neither person is willing to put in any
work after the lovey dovey sex magic
ends, and the real give and take
begins.

28. Of course, if all you care about is the
lovey dovey super sex part, and you're
happy to be a serial monogamist your
entire life, more power to you.

29. Plenty of people are happy with that,
men and women.

30. But if you want something more,
you've got to understand that ALL
aspects of human relationships RARELY
leave the process stage.

31. Unless you're at a funeral, and your
throwing dirt on a dead dude in a box.

32. So next time your out in a social
setting, and you see some girl you'd
like to talk to, think of your potential
interaction with her as one long
process.

33. Instead of saying, "how can I GET some
of that," which implies you're going
after some static "thing," think more in
process terms.

34. "How can I create a sustained
interaction with that person that will
satisfy both of our wants and needs in
a way that will make us both better off
than we are now?"

35. Or if that sentence is too long, how
about this one:

36. "I wonder if we can build something
together."

37. Try this, and see what
happens.
mindpersuasion.com