Students have examined and revised an Investigation writing sample based on Criteria A, B, and C of the rubric. Now, they’ll undergo the same process with a peer essay. In addition, they’ll do this alone instead of in groups. So, although the process is the same as in the last Investigation writing activity, this one might be more difficult since students will move away from group work and will complete this worksheet on their own. However, it’s important for students to be able to accomplish this exercise on their own since in the next lesson, they’ll apply this same process to their own writing. Again, while the categories in the rubric are a useful tool for initially understanding the different elements of writing, they need to be looked at as a whole since the areas of focus are interrelated. Register to explore the whole course here: https://school.bighistoryproject.com/bhplive?WT.mc_id=Slideshare12202017

1. TEACHER MATERIALS
1
Purpose
Students have examined and revised an Investigation writing sample based on Criteria A, B, and C of the rubric. Now, they’ll undergo the same process with a
peer essay. In addition, they’ll do this alone instead of in groups. So, although the process is the same as in the last Investigation writing activity, this one might be
more difficult since students will move away from group work and will complete this worksheet on their own. However, it’s important for students to be able to
accomplish this exercise on their own since in the next lesson, they’ll apply this same process to their own writing. Again, while the categories in the rubric are a
useful tool for initially understanding the different elements of writing, they need to be looked at as a whole since the areas of focus are interrelated.
Process
Tell students that this Investigation writing activity is going to be a lot like the last one they did. However, this time they’re going to revise one of their classmate’s
essays. And, instead of doing this in a group, they’ll analyze and revise their classmate’s essay on their own. And in case they need reminding, instead of just
looking at one criterion from the BHP Writing Rubric, they’re going to revise text using each of the three areas they’ve been focusing on: Constructing an Argument,
Using Texts as Evidence, and Applying BHP Concepts.
Let students know that although this activity might be harder than the previous Investigation writing exercises because they’re working alone, as in the last
Investigation writing activity, they’ll have a set of sentence starters to help them with their revisions. Have students look at the Revising Investigation Writing–
Sentence Starters Part 2 Worksheet. Also, hand out Investigation 7 essays to students for peer review. If you didn’t ask students to do Investigation 7, you can use
any essay graded using the BHP Writing Rubric.
First, have students read the peer essay they were given, keeping in mind the BHP Writing Rubric Criteria A, B, and C. Once students have reviewed the essay, ask
them to underline what they think is the major claim or thesis. Then, tell them to improve the thesis statement using one of the sentence starters provided. Once
they’ve done that, they should circle anywhere texts were used as evidence. Next, they should rewrite one of those sentences using one of the sentence starters
provided. Finally, have them highlight anywhere BHP concepts were applied, and have them use yet another sentence starter to improve upon any statements
where BHP concepts were applied. If any of the criteria from the rubric are missing, have them add a sentence or two so that it’s now part of the revised essay.
Once they’ve completed their worksheets, pair the students so they can share their feedback and suggestions for improvement with the classmate whose essay
they reviewed. Remind them that Investigation 8 is up next, and that they should use the sentence starters and what they’ve learned from the analysis and revision
process when writing their Investigation 8 essays.
BIG HISTORY PROJECT / LESSON 8.3 ACTIVITY
REVISING INVESTIGATION WRITING–SENTENCE STARTERS PART 2

2. 1
BIG HISTORY PROJECT COMPLETE RUBRIC
WRITING RUBRIC
CriteriaA-Constructinganargument
Exceptional (5) Skilled (4) Proficient (3) Developing (2) Inadequate (1)
• Thesis/major claim: Makes
a clear, well-articulated, and
compelling thesis/major claim.
- Stakes out a position anddirectly
addresses the essay question.
- Introduced early in essayto
structure argument.
- Thesis/major claim reflects
appropriate nuance; cautious
about dualistic or binarythinking.
• Structure: Sections carefully
support the thesis/major claim
with a clear and coherent line of
reasoning to conclusion (minor
claims).
- Well-executed progression of
ideas as each paragraph and
minor claim builds upon or
extends the last.
- Logical and clear organization
with a strong beginning, middle,
and end, with a clearconclusion.
- Conclusion supports essay’s
ideas and includes statementof
significance orimplications.
- Sophisticated arrangement of
content with evident transitions,
connecting parts to construct a
coherent essay.
• Counterclaims: Fairly and
effectively recognizes and
refutes opposing claims.
• Thesis/major claim: Makes a
clear and recognizable thesis/
major claim.
- Stakes out a position relatedto
the essay question.
- Introduced early in essayto
structure argument.
- Thesis/major claim establishes
an identifiable position, though it
might reflect dualistic or binary
thinking.
• Structure: Sections support
thesis/major claim with a
coherent line of reasoning to
conclusion (minor claims).
- Logical and clear organization
with a strong beginning, middle,
and end, with a clearconclusion.
- Conclusion supports essay’s
ideas, though lacks reference
to significance orimplications of
the thesis/major claim.
- Essay uses some transitionsto
connect its parts.
• Counterclaims: Recognizes and
attempts to refute an opposing
claim.
• Thesis/major claim: Makes an
appropriate thesis/major claim.
- Stakes out a position relatedto
the essay question.
- May not be introduced until
the end of the essay, or is
broken out overtwo or more
paragraphs.
- Thesis/major claim establishes a
position, though it might reflect
dualistic or binarythinking.
• Structure: Sections are
organized but do not always
support the thesis/major claim
or connect to the conclusion
(minor claims).
- Has a beginning, middle,and
end, with aconclusion.
- Conclusion makes brief or
incomplete reference to the
thesis/major claim.
- Essay lacks cleartransitions.
• Counterclaims: Brief or no
mention of an opposing claim.
• Thesis/major claim: References
the topic, but makes no clear
thesis or claim.
• Structure: Attempts to organize
essay but fails to link the sections
to the thesis/major claim, each
other, or the conclusion.
- Has a weak beginning,middle,
and end.
- Essay lacks transitions.
• Counterclaims: Does not
mention an opposing claim at all.
• Thesis/major claim: Off topic.
• Structure: Very limited attempt
to organize sections of the
essay.
- Essay is brief and does not fully
address question.
• Counterclaims: Does not
mentionan opposing claim at all.

3. 2
BIG HISTORY PROJECT COMPLETE RUBRIC
WRITING RUBRICCriteriaB-Usingtextsasevidence
Exceptional (5) Skilled (4) Proficient (3) Developing (2) Inadequate (1)
• Source:
- Explicitly uses five or more of
the available Investigation texts
and/or BHP-related sources.
- Clearly cites sources in an
appropriate manner (for
example, by author/producer).
• Analysis: Consistently shows
analytical reading of textsby:
- Demonstrating careful
understanding of eachtext.
- Recognizing and explaining
relevant discrepancies among
sources.
- Recognizing and explaining
similarities among sources.
- Recognizing the historical
context of the documents.
- Explaining corroboration among
the texts.
• Connection to thesis/major
claim and minor claims:
- Use of documents persuasively
as evidence.
- Strong use of facts,examples,
and details to supportclaims.
- Strong use of factual
information, quotations,
analogies, illustrations, or
anecdotes to support claim.
- Clearly and fully explains the
relationship between the
claims and the support (clear
warrants).
• Accuracy: Makes no errors
of fact in relation to the
Investigation library source
material used.
• Source:
- Explicitly uses four or more of
the available Investigation texts
and/or BHP-related resources.
- Cites all sources in some
manner (for example, Text #1 or
byauthor/producer).
• Analysis: Shows analytical
reading of texts by:
- Demonstrating understanding of
each text.
- Recognizing similarities among
sources.
- Occasionally recognizing the
discrepancies among sources.
- Corroborating or connectingtwo
or more of thetexts.
• Connection to thesis/major
claim and minor claims:
- Use of documents as evidence.
- Use of some facts,examples,
and details to supportclaims.
- Explains the relationship
between the claims and most
of the texts.
• Accuracy: Makes no errors
of fact in relation to the
Investigation library source
material used.
• Source:
- Uses some of the available
Investigation texts (three or
more).
- May not cite all of the texts in
some manner (“Text #1,” for
example), but essay is clearly
using three or more of the texts.
• Analysis: Occasionally shows
analytical reading of the texts by:
- Demonstrating understanding of
each text.
- Recognizing similarities or
discrepancies between two
sources.
• Connection to thesis/major
claim and minor claims:
- Does not use the documents as
evidence; does not use texts to
illustrate claims.
- Use of some facts, examples
and details—not texts—to
support claims.
- Mentions or hints at the
relationship between the
claim and the facts, but does
no attempt to explain the
relationship.
• Accuracy: Makes one or two
minor errors offact in relation
to the Investigation library
source material used.
• Source: Mentions at least
one or two of the available
Investigation texts.
• Analysis: No analysis of
sources, although there is some
understanding of the texts used.
• Connection to thesis/major
claim and minor claims:
- Does not use the texts to
support or illustrateclaims.
- Minimal use of facts, examples
or details—not texts—to support
claims.
• Accuracy: Makes many minor
errors of fact (three or more)
or a major, substantive error in
relation to the source material
used.
• Source: Makes no mentionof
Investigation texts to support or
illustrate claims.
• Analysis:
- Essay is “support-free.”
- No use of evidence, examples,
relevant details, analogies, or
illustrations.
• Accuracy: Makes major errors
of fact in relation to the source
material used.

4. 3
BIG HISTORY PROJECT COMPLETE RUBRIC
WRITING RUBRICCriteriaC-ApplyingBHPconcepts
Exceptional (5) Skilled (4) Proficient (3) Developing (2) Inadequate (1)
• Concepts: Effectively applies
two ormore BHP course-level
concepts and/or unit-level
concepts or ideas.
- Demonstrates an understanding
of the concepts.
- Connects the concepts tothe
argument and/or evidence.
- Avoids misconceptions of the
concepts.
• Accuracy: No errors in applying
new BHP facts or concepts
(that is, ones not found in
Investigation library) to illustrate
or support concepts and claims,
or to inform theessay.
• Concepts: Applies one BHP
course-level concept and/or
unit- level concept oridea.
- Demonstrates an understanding
of the concept.
- Connects the concept tothe
argument and/or evidence.
- Avoids misconceptions of the
concept.
• Accuracy: Avoids errors in
applying new BHP facts or
concepts (that is, ones not
found in Investigation library) to
illustrate or support concepts
and claims, or to inform the
essay.
• Concepts: Attempts to apply
one BHP course-level concept
and/or unit-level concept oridea.
- Mentions a concept
appropriately, but without fully
articulating its meaning or
connection to the argument.
- Avoids explicit misconceptions
of the concept.
• Accuracy: May make an
occasional minor error in
applying new BHP facts or
concepts (that is, ones not
found in Investigation library) to
illustrate or support concepts
and claims, or to inform the
essay.
• Concepts: Incorrectly or
inappropriately mentions at least
one BHP course-level concept
and/ or unit-level concept or
idea.
- Mentions a concept.
- Includes misconceptions of the
concept.
• Accuracy: May make many
minor errors or a major error
in applying new BHP facts or
concepts (that is, ones not found
in Investigation library).
• Concepts: No mention of BHP
course-level concepts and/or
unit- level concepts orideas.

5. 4
BIG HISTORY PROJECT COMPLETE RUBRIC
WRITING RUBRICCriteriaD-Writingwithappropriatemechanics
Exceptional (5) Skilled (4) Proficient (3) Developing (2) Inadequate (1)
• Language: Uses a variety of
vivid, concise, and discipline-
specific words.
• Mechanics:
- Writing is free of spellingand
grammatical errors.
- Needs little or no editing.
• Tone/voice:
- Sophisticated and well-
controlled sentences; uses
variation.
- Uses consistent voice and an
objective tone appropriate for
academic writing.
- Uses style consistent with
academic writing.
• Language: Uses conciseand
discipline-specific words.
• Mechanics:
- Writing has an occasional
spelling or minorgrammatical
error.
- Needs modest editing.
• Tone/voice:
- Complete sentences withsome
variation.
- Uses objective tone appropriate
for academic writing.
• Language: Uses appropriate
and specific words, although
not necessarily reflecting the
disciplines of history or the
sciences.
• Mechanics:
- Writing has spelling,
grammatical, and punctuation
errors, but they do not impede
readability or comprehension.
- Needs editing.
• Tone/voice: Tone does not
reflect academic writing (uses
slang, for example).
• Language: Words used are
occasionally vague, redundant,
or misused.
• Mechanics:
- Writing has spelling,
grammatical, and punctuation
errors that hinder readability or
comprehension.
- Frequent errors in sentence or
paragraph structure (incomplete
or run-on sentences or
paragraphs, for example).
- Needs substantive editing.
• Tone/voice: Tone does not
reflect academic writing (uses
slang, for example).
• Language: Word choice is
incorrect or distracting.
• Mechanics:
- Writing has spelling,
grammatical, and punctuation
errors that impede readability or
comprehension.
- Frequent errors in sentence or
paragraph structure (incomplete
or run-on sentences or
paragraphs, for example).
- Inadequate mechanics with
consistent errors in punctuation,
capitalization, and spelling.
- Needs substantive editing.
• Tone/voice: Tone is informal
(uses slang, for example); does
not reflect academic writing.

6. STUDENT MATERIALS
1
Purpose
You’ve examined and revised parts of an Investigation writing sample using Criteria A, B, and C of the rubric. Now, you’ll undergo the same process with a peer
essay. This time, you’ll work alone instead of in groups. Although the process is the same as in the last Investigation writing activity, this might be more difficult
since you’re going solo. Why do you have to do this? Remember, the categories in the rubric are a useful tool for initially understanding the different elements of
writing, but they need to be considered as parts of a whole since the areas of focus are interrelated.
Process
This Investigation writing activity is going to be a lot like the last one you did. However, this time you’re going to revise one of your classmate’s essays. And, you’ll
work alone instead of in groups. Remember, instead of just looking at one criterion from the BHP Writing Rubric, you’re going to revise text from each of the three
areas you’ve been focusing on: Constructing an Argument, Using Texts as Evidence, and Applying BHP Concepts.
As in the last Investigation writing activity, your teacher will give you a set of sentence starters to help with your revisions. Look at the Revising Investigation
Writing– Sentence Starters Part 2 Worksheet and read the peer essay given to you by your teacher. While reading, keep Criteria A, B, and C of the rubric in mind.
Once you’ve reviewed the essay, underline what you think is the major claim or thesis. Then, improve the thesis statement using one of the sentence starters
provided. Once you’ve done that, circle anywhere texts were used as evidence, and then rewrite one of those sentences using one of the sentence starters
provided. Finally, highlight anywhere BHP concepts were applied, and use yet another sentence starter to improve any statements where BHP concepts were
applied. If any of the criteria are missing, add a sentence or two to the essay to account for the missing piece.
Once you’ve completed your worksheet, pair up with the classmate whose essay you read, and share your feedback and suggestions for improvement. Investigation
8 is up next, and you should use the sentence starters and what you’ve learned from the analysis and revision process when writing your Investigation 8 essay.
BIG HISTORY PROJECT / LESSON 8.3 ACTIVITY
REVISING INVESTIGATION WRITING–SENTENCE STARTERS PART 2

7. Name: Date:
STUDENT MATERIALS
2
Directions:
1. Read your peer’s essay.
2. Underline what you think is the thesis/major claim. Then, use the one of the following sentence starters to improve the thesis/major claim. Add your sentence
in the space provided below.
• From my own point of view…
• [quote] I agree/disagree with…
• It seems to me that…
3. Circle anywhere texts were used as evidence. Then, use one of the following sentence starters to either revise or add the use of texts as evidence. Add your
sentence in the space provided below, and add a star to the beginning and end of the sentence(s) or phrase(s) you revised.
• First…second…
• In fact…
• As you can see…
4. Highlight anywhere BHP concepts were applied. Then, use one of the following sentence starters to add or improve the use of BHP concepts in your peer’s
essay. Add your sentence in the space provided below, and add a smiley face ( ) to the essay where this sentence would be added in..
• It is clear that…
• [Source] suggested/promoted/believed…
• Also…..
Notes:
- If any criteria are missing, add a sentence or two, using one of the sentence starters provided to add the missing criteria to the essay.
- You will be asked to share your edits with the classmate whose essay you reviewed, so make sure you’re ready to share your work.
BIG HISTORY PROJECT / LESSON 8.3 ACTIVITY
REVISING INVESTIGATION WRITING–SENTENCE STARTERS PART 2

8. Name: Date:
STUDENT MATERIALS
3
Sentence Starter Sentences
1. Thesis/Major Claim
2. Using Texts as Evidence
3. Applying BHP Concepts
BIG HISTORY PROJECT / LESSON 8.3 ACTIVITY
REVISING INVESTIGATION WRITING–SENTENCE STARTERS PART 2

9. 1
BIG HISTORY PROJECT
WRITING RUBRIC
CriteriaA-Constructinganargument
Exceptional (5) Skilled (4) Proficient (3) Developing (2) Inadequate (1)
• Thesis/major claim: Makes
a clear, well-articulated, and
compelling thesis/major claim.
• Structure: Sections carefully
support the thesis/major claim
with a clear and coherent line of
reasoning to conclusion (minor
claims).
• Counterclaim: Fairly and
effectively recognizes and
refutes opposing claims.
• Thesis/major claim: Makes a
clear and recognizable thesis/
major claim.
• Structure: Sections support
thesis/major claim with a
coherent line of reasoning to
conclusion (minor claims).
• Counterclaim: Recognizes and
attempts to refute an opposing
claim.
• Thesis/major claim: Makes an
appropriate thesis/major claim.
• Structure: Sections are
organized but do not always
support the thesis/major claim
or connect to the conclusion
(minor claims).
• Counterclaim: Brief or no
mention of an opposing claim.
• Thesis/major claim:
References the topic, but makes
no clear thesis or claim.
• Structure: Attempts to organize
essay but fails to link the sections
to the thesis/major claim, each
other, or the conclusion.
• Counterclaims: Does not
mention an opposing claim at all.
• Thesis/major claim: Off topic.
• Structure: Absence of
structure. Very limited attempt to
organize sections of the essay.
• Counterclaim: Does not
mention an opposing claim at all.
STUDENT RUBRIC

10. 2
BIG HISTORY PROJECT
WRITING RUBRICCriteriaB-Usingtextsasevidence
Exceptional (5) Skilled (4) Proficient (3) Developing (2) Inadequate (1)
• Source:
- Explicitly uses five or more of
the available Investigation texts
and/or BHP-related sources.
- Clearly cites sources in an
appropriate manner (for
example, by author/producer).
• Analysis: Consistently shows
analytical reading of texts.
• Connection to thesis/major
im and minor claims:
- Use of documents persuasively
as evidence.
- Strong use of facts, examples,
and details to support claims.
- Strong use of factual
information, quotations,
analogies, illustrations, or
anecdotes to support claim.
- Clearly and fully explains the
relationship between the
claims and the support (clear
warrants).
• Accuracy: Makes no errors
of fact in relation to the
Investigation library source
material used.
• Source:
- Explicitly uses four or more of
the available Investigation texts
and/or BHP-related resources.
- Cites all sources in some
manner (for example, Text #1 or
by author/producer).
• Analysis: Shows analytical
reading of texts by:
- Demonstrating understanding of
each text.
- Recognizing similarities among
sources.
- Occasionally recognizing the
discrepancies among sources.
- Corroborating or connecting two
or more of the texts.
• Connection to thesis/major
claim and minor claims:
- Use of documents as evidence.
- Use of some facts, examples,
and details to support claims.
- Explains the relationship
between the claims and most of
the texts.
• Accuracy: Makes no errors
of fact in relation to the
Investigation library source
material used.
• Source:
- Uses some of the available
Investigation texts (three or
more).
- May not cite all of the texts in
some manner (“Text #1,” for
example), but essay is clearly
using three or more of the texts.
• Analysis: Occasionally shows
analytical reading of the texts .
• Connection to thesis/major
claim and minor claims:
- Does not use the documents as
evidence; does not use texts to
illustrate claims.
- Use of some facts, examples
and details—not texts—to
support claims.
- Mentions or hints at the
relationship between the
claim and the facts, but does
no attempt to explain the
relationship.
• Accuracy: Makes one or two
minor errors of fact in relation to
the Investigation library source
material used.
• Source: Mentions at least
one or two of the available
Investigation texts.
• Analysis: No analysis of
sources, although there is some
understanding of the texts used.
• Connection to thesis/major
claim and minor claims:
- Does not use the texts to
support or illustrate claims.
- Minimal use of facts, examples
or details—not texts—to support
claims.
• Accuracy: Makes many minor
errors of fact (three or more)
or a major, substantive error in
relation to the source material
used.
• Source: Makes no mention of
Investigation texts to support or
illustrate claims.
• Analysis:
- Essay is “support-free.”
- No use of evidence, examples,
relevant details, analogies, or
illustrations.
• Accuracy: Makes major errors
of fact in relation to the source
material used.
STUDENT RUBRIC

11. 3
BIG HISTORY PROJECT
WRITING RUBRICCriteriaC-ApplyingBHPconcepts
Exceptional (5) Skilled (4) Proficient (3) Developing (2) Inadequate (1)
• Concepts: Effectively applies
two or more BHP course-level
concepts and/or unit-level
concepts or ideas.
• Accuracy: No errors in applying
new BHP facts or concepts
(that is, ones not found in
Investigation library) to illustrate
or support concepts and claims,
or to inform the essay.
• Concepts: Applies one BHP
course-level concept and/or
unit- level concept or idea.
• Accuracy: Avoids errors in
applying new BHP facts or
concepts (that is, ones not
found in Investigation library) to
illustrate or support concepts
and claims, or to inform the
essay.
• Concepts: Attempts to apply
one BHP course-level concept
and/or unit-level concept or
idea.
• Accuracy: May make an
occasional minor error in
applying new BHP facts or
concepts (that is, ones not
found in Investigation library) to
illustrate or support concepts
and claims, or to inform the
essay.
• Concepts: Incorrectly or
inappropriately mentions at least
one BHP course-level concept
and/ or unit-level concept or
idea.
• Accuracy: May make many
minor errors or a major error
in applying new BHP facts or
concepts (that is, ones not found
in Investigation library).
• Concepts: No mention of BHP
course-level concepts and/or
unit- level concepts or ideas.
STUDENT RUBRIC

12. 4
BIG HISTORY PROJECT
WRITING RUBRICCriteriaD-Writingwithappropriatemechanics
Exceptional (5) Skilled (4) Proficient (3) Developing (2) Inadequate (1)
• Language: Uses a variety of
vivid, concise, and discipline-
specific words.
• Mechanics:
- Writing is free of spelling and
grammatical errors.
- Needs little or no editing.
• Tone/voice:
- Sophisticated and well-
controlled sentences; uses
variation.
- Uses consistent voice and an
objective tone appropriate for
academic writing.
- Uses style consistent with
academic writing.
• Language: Uses concise and
discipline-specific words.
• Mechanics:
- Writing has an occasional
spelling or minor grammatical
error.
- Needs modest editing.
• Tone/voice:
- Complete sentences with some
variation.
- Uses objective tone appropriate
for academic writing.
• Language: Uses appropriate
and specific words, although
not necessarily reflecting the
disciplines of history or the
sciences.
• Mechanics:
- Writing has spelling,
grammatical, and punctuation
errors, but they do not impede
readability or comprehension.
- Needs editing.
• Tone/voice: Tone does not
reflect academic writing (uses
slang, for example).
• Language: Words used are
occasionally vague, redundant,
or misused.
• Mechanics:
- Writing has spelling,
grammatical, and punctuation
errors that hinder readability or
comprehension.
- Frequent errors in sentence or
paragraph structure (incomplete
or run-on sentences or
paragraphs, for example).
- Needs substantive editing.
• Tone/voice: Tone does not
reflect academic writing (uses
slang, for example).
• Language: Word choice is
incorrect or distracting.
• Mechanics:
- Writing has spelling,
grammatical, and punctuation
errors that impede readability or
comprehension.
- Frequent errors in sentence or
paragraph structure (incomplete
or run-on sentences or
paragraphs, for example).
- Inadequate mechanics with
consistent errors in punctuation,
capitalization, and spelling.
- Needs substantive editing.
• Tone/voice: Tone is informal
(uses slang, for example); does
not reflect academic writing.
STUDENT RUBRIC

13. 5
BIG HISTORY PROJECT
Presenter:Reviewer:
STUDENT RUBRIC
WRITING RUBRIC
Description Exceptional (5) Skilled (4) Proficient (3) Developing (2) Inadequate (1) Score
Criteria A -
Constructing
an argument
Criteria B -
Using texts as
evidence
Criteria C -
Applying BHP
concepts
Criteria D -
Writing with
appropriate
mechanics
Total Score