For Creative Media

1. Veganuary Article Editing
Scott Harrand

2. One of the biggest changes a person makes when they become vegan is their diet. Many think that the vegan diet is very limited,
when in actual fact it is not. A vegan diet consists only of plants, or foods made from plants such as vegetables, grains, nuts and
fruits. You are able to get all of the nutrients that you require from eating a varied and balanced vegan diet.
Vegans do not eat animals, or their products such as milk and eggs. “But where will I get my protein?” I hear you ask, well
nuts, beans and pulses provide a great source of dairy-free protein. As for the calcium and vitamin D you would usually receive
from dairy products, you can find these in fortified soya drinks, calcium-set tofu, dried fruit or alternatively you could consider
taking supplements. Surprisingly, in the UK calcium is added to white and brown flour for bread, by law.
A great benefit of a plant-based diet is that your body will thank you. Being vegan reaps many health benefits, including
increased energy and younger looking skin. You are less likely to become obese or suffer from heart disease, diabetes or cancer.
For those wanting to lose weight, a vegan diet has proved more effective than any standard low-fat diets.
For some people, becoming vegan is not about what you cannot eat; it is about exploring what you can. With becoming vegan
comes many fun and exciting recipes that you can try. There are many vegan food bloggers that are dedicated to sharing their
favorite recipes with others online.
“Post Punk Kitchen” is a blog by Isa Chandra Moskowitz, from Brooklyn. It shows clear moral and ethical reasons behind the meat
and dairy-free cooking. The website is particularly good for those seeking recipes and great vegan bakes and desserts. The
intention of her website was to support her own TV show, as well as to foster a vegan cooking and baking community.
“It's time to ask ourselves: if it is now possible to live a life that involves delicious food and drink, delivers better health, leaves a
smaller carbon footprint and avoids killing other creatures - then why don't we?”
– The Vegan Society
Animal cruelty and animal exploitation is everywhere, but by becoming vegan there is another person preventing the cause. Many
become vegan as they feel an emotional attachment with animals and believe that they too, have the right to life and freedom.
To become vegetarian simply isn’t enough to stop the harm caused to animals in many cases. The production of dairy is
responsible for the death of countless male calves that prove no use to a dairy farmer. Many cows are also slaughtered
prematurely when their milk production decreases. Likewise, when it comes to harvesting eggs, even ‘free range’ or ‘ethical’ eggs
contribute to the slaughter of male chicks at just a day of age.
Farming animals for the production of meat or their products is also bad for the environment. The animals consume a lot of water
as well as crops, which take up a lot of space, contributing to deforestation, species extinction and loss of habitat. The space that
is used to harvest crops for animals could be put to much better use had the land been used to create crop for humans.
Not only is a plant-based diet the best thing to do for you, the Earth or the animals, but also it is the most sustainable way of
feeding a human family. The vegan diet only requires one third of the land than what is needed to support a diet with dairy and
meat products. Research also shows that becoming vegan is financially beneficial, too. So, why not go vegan for January?
Original Article: Word count, 624

3. Factual Sources

4. “You are able to get all of the nutrients
that you require from eating a varied
and balanced Vegan diet”
• http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/Vegetarianhealth
/Pages/Vegandiets.aspx

5. -“ …nuts, beans and pulses provide a
great source of dairy-free protein.”
• http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4771/10-
Vegan-Sources-of-Protein.html

6. “Surprisingly, in the UK calcium is
added to white and brown flour for
bread, by law.”
• http://www.sustainweb.org/realbread/flour_f
ortification/

7. “ A great benefit of a plant-based diet is that your
body will thank you. Being vegan reaps many
health benefits, including increased energy and
younger looking skin. You are less likely to become
obese or suffer from heart disease, diabetes or
cancer. For those wanting to lose weight, a vegan
diet has proved more effective than any standard
low-fat diets.”
• http://www.nursingdegree.net/blog/19/57-
health-benefits-of-going-vegan/

8. -““Post Punk Kitchen” is a blog by Isa Chandra Moskowitz, from
Brooklyn. It shows clear moral and ethical reasons behind the
meat and dairy-free cooking. The website is particularly good for
those seeking recipes and great vegan bakes and desserts. The
intention of her website was to support her own TV show, as
well as to foster a vegan cooking and baking community.”
• http://www.theppk.com/

9. -“It's time to ask ourselves: if it is now possible to live a life that
involves delicious food and drink, delivers better health, leaves a
smaller carbon footprint and avoids killing other creatures - then
why don't we?”
– The Vegan Society”
• https://www.vegansociety.com/go-
vegan/why-go-vegan

10. -To become vegetarian simply isn’t enough to stop the
harm caused to animals in many cases. The production
of dairy is responsible for the death of countless male
calves that prove no use to a dairy farmer. Many cows
are also slaughtered prematurely when their milk
production decreases. Likewise, when it comes to
harvesting eggs, even ‘free range’ or ‘ethical’ eggs
contribute to the slaughter of male chicks at just a day
of age.
• http://www.veganuary.com/why/animals/cow
s/
• http://www.veganuary.com/why/animals/chic
kens/

11. -Farming animals for the production of meat or their products is
also bad for the environment. The animals consume a lot of
water as well as crops, which take up a lot of space, contributing
to deforestation, species extinction and loss of habitat. The
space that is used to harvest crops for animals could be put to
much better use had the land been used to create crop for
humans.
• http://www.veganuary.com/why/environment
al-benefits/youll-save-water/
• http://www.veganuary.com/why/environment
al-benefits/youll-protect-nature/
• http://www.veganuary.com/why/environment
al-benefits/youll-save-wildlife/

12. -“The vegan diet only requires one
third of the land than what is needed
to support a diet with dairy and meat
products.”
• https://www.vegansociety.com/go-
vegan/why-go-vegan

13. -“Research also shows that becoming
vegan is financially beneficial, too.”
• http://organicgreenmommy.com/20-amazing-
benefits-of-going-vegan/

14. Edits and
Alterations

15. • “The intention of her website was to support
her own TV show, as well as to foster a vegan
cooking and baking community.”
• I removed this sentence because I felt the
most important things about the website had
already been said.

16. • “A vegan diet consists only of plants, or foods
made from plants such as vegetables, grains,
nuts and fruits. “
• I changed this sentence to “A vegan diet
consists only of plant-products, like
vegetables, grains, nuts and fruits” in order to
keep it shorter.

17. • “For some people, becoming vegan is not about what you cannot eat; it is
about exploring what you can. With becoming vegan comes many fun and
exciting recipes that you can try. There are many vegan food bloggers that
are dedicated to sharing their favorite recipes with others online.
• “Post Punk Kitchen” is a blog by Isa Chandra Moskowitz, from Brooklyn. It
shows clear moral and ethical reasons behind the meat and dairy-free
cooking. The website is particularly good for those seeking recipes and
great vegan bakes and desserts.”
• I edited this paragraph and merged into one, shorter paragraph, trying to
keep most of the information.
• “For some people, becoming vegan is not about what you cannot eat; it is
about exploring what you can. “Post Punk Kitchen” is a blog by Isa Chandra
Moskowitz, from Brooklyn, which is just one of many Vegan food blogs, all
with fun and exciting recipes that you can try. It shows clear moral and
ethical reasons behind the meat and dairy-free cooking. The website is
particularly good for those seeking recipes and great vegan bakes and
desserts.”

18. • “A great benefit of a plant-based diet is that your body will thank
you. Being vegan reaps many health benefits, including increased
energy and younger looking skin. You are less likely to become
obese or suffer from heart disease, diabetes or cancer. For those
wanting to lose weight, a vegan diet has proved more effective than
any standard low-fat diets.”
• I made small changes to this paragraph to lower the word count
while keeping all the information essentially intact.
• “A great benefit of a plant-based diet is that your body will thank
you. Being vegan reaps many health benefits, including increased
energy and younger looking skin. It decreases chances of becoming
obese, suffering from heart disease, diabetes or cancer. A vegan
diet has also proved more effective for weight loss than any
standard low-fat diets.”

19. • “One of the biggest changes a person makes when they
become vegan is their diet. Many think that the vegan diet
is very limited, when in actual fact it is not. A vegan diet
consists only of plant-products, like vegetables, grains, nuts
and fruits. You are able to get all of the nutrients that you
require from eating a varied and balanced vegan diet.”
• I removed the sentence “Many think that the vegan diet is
very limited, when in actual fact it is not” because this
information is mentioned in later paragraphs.
• “One of the biggest changes a person makes when they
become vegan is their diet. A vegan diet consists only of
plant-products, like vegetables, grains, nuts and fruits. You
are able to get all of the nutrients that you require from
eating a varied and balanced vegan diet.”

20. • “Vegans do not eat animals, or their products such as milk and
eggs. “But where will I get my protein?” I hear you ask, well nuts,
beans and pulses provide a great source of dairy-free protein. As for
the calcium and vitamin D you would usually receive from dairy
products, you can find these in fortified soya drinks, calcium-set
tofu, dried fruit or alternatively you could consider taking
supplements. Surprisingly, in the UK calcium is added to white and
brown flour for bread, by law.”
• I made a few minor changes to the length of sentences in this
paragraph, while trying to keep the information essentially intact.
• “Vegans do not eat animals, or their products such as milk and
eggs. “But where will I get my protein?” I hear you ask, well nuts,
beans and pulses provide a great source of dairy-free protein. As for
the calcium and vitamin D you would usually receive from dairy
products, you can find these in fortified soya drinks, calcium-set
tofu, dried fruit, bread (calcium fortified by law), or supplements.”

21. • “A great benefit of a plant-based diet is that your body will thank
you. Being vegan reaps many health benefits, including increased
energy and younger looking skin. It decreases chances of becoming
obese, suffering from heart disease, diabetes or cancer. A vegan
diet has also proved more effective for weight loss than any
standard low-fat diets.”
• I removed the first sentence of this paragraph, as I believe the
following sentence was a sufficient introductory sentence, and
therefore the original was not needed in the shortened article.
• “Being vegan reaps many health benefits, including increased
energy and younger looking skin. It decreases chances of becoming
obese, suffering from heart disease, diabetes or cancer. A vegan
diet has also proved more effective for weight loss than any
standard low-fat diets.”

22. • “Animal cruelty and animal exploitation is everywhere, but by becoming vegan
there is another person preventing the cause. Many become vegan as they feel an
emotional attachment with animals and believe that they too, have the right to life
and freedom.
• The production of dairy is responsible for the death of countless male calves that
prove no use to a dairy farmer. Many cows are also slaughtered prematurely when
their milk production decreases. Likewise, when it comes to harvesting eggs, even
‘free range’ or ‘ethical’ eggs contribute to the slaughter of male chicks at just a day
of age.”
• I changed this paragraph by reducing it to the first sentence, and then merging it in
with the next paragraph, I also made a few additional word changes to the
paragraph to lower the word count.
• “Animal cruelty and animal exploitation is everywhere, but by becoming vegan
there is another person preventing the cause. To become vegetarian simply isn’t
enough to stop the harm caused to animals in many cases. The production of dairy
is responsible for the death of countless male calves, who are slaughtered
prematurely when their milk production decreases. When it comes to harvesting
eggs, even ‘free range’ or ‘ethical’ eggs contribute to the slaughter of male chicks
at just a day of age.”

23. Edited Article: Word count, 500
One of the biggest changes a person makes when they become vegan is their diet. A vegan diet consists only of
plant-products, like vegetables, grains, nuts and fruits. You are able to get all of the nutrients that you require
from eating a varied and balanced vegan diet.
Vegans do not eat animals, or their products such as milk and eggs. “But where will I get my protein?” I
hear you ask, well nuts, beans and pulses provide a great source of dairy-free protein. As for the calcium and
vitamin D you would usually receive from dairy products, you can find these in fortified soya drinks, calcium-set
tofu, dried fruit, bread (calcium fortified by law), or supplements.
Being vegan reaps many health benefits, including increased energy and younger looking skin. It
decreases chances of becoming obese, suffering from heart disease, diabetes or cancer. A vegan diet has also
proved more effective for weight loss than any standard low-fat diets.
“For some people, becoming vegan is not about what you cannot eat; it is about exploring what you can. “Post
Punk Kitchen” is a blog by Isa Chandra Moskowitz, from Brooklyn, which is just one of many Vegan food blogs,
all with fun and exciting recipes that you can try. It shows clear moral and ethical reasons behind the meat and
dairy-free cooking. The website is particularly good for those seeking recipes and great vegan bakes and
desserts.”
“It's time to ask ourselves: if it is now possible to live a life that involves delicious food and drink, delivers
better health, leaves a smaller carbon footprint and avoids killing other creatures - then why don't we?”
– The Vegan Society
Animal cruelty and animal exploitation is everywhere, but by becoming vegan there is another person
preventing the cause. To become vegetarian simply isn’t enough to stop the harm caused to animals in many
cases. The production of dairy is responsible for the death of countless male calves, who are slaughtered
prematurely when their milk production decreases. When it comes to harvesting eggs, even ‘free range’ or
‘ethical’ eggs contribute to the slaughter of male chicks at just a day of age.
Farming animals for the production of meat or their products is also bad for the environment. The animals
consume a lot of water as well as crops, which take up a lot of space, contributing to deforestation, species
extinction and loss of habitat. The space that is used to harvest crops for animals could be put to much better
use had the land been used to create crop for humans.
Not only is a plant-based diet the best thing to do for you, the Earth or the animals, but also it is the most
sustainable way of feeding a human family. The vegan diet only requires one third of the land than what is
needed to support a diet with dairy and meat products. Research also shows that becoming vegan is financially
beneficial, too. So, why not go vegan for January?