2. Original article - 432 words
Veganism: A philosophy and way of living.
Veganism is a widely controversial way of living that seeks to exclude the exploitation of animals for food, clothing, testing and entertainment. Veganuary is
a global campaign that launched in January 2014 to help encourage people to try vegan for January. With a success of 3,200 people ready to commit in
January 2014, the campaign has gone from strength to strength to help raise awareness of this lifestyle.
Veganism not only helps to reduce the suffering of animals and help the planet but also improves personal health. Due to the fact vegans do not eat animals
or their products, they must find the essential nutrients they need from plant based sources, vegan alternatives and fortified foods. This means that vegans
eat a lot more fruits and vegetables than omnivores. Vegans get the most amount of nutrients they can from their food and are keen to make sure they
know how to get everything they need such as iron. However, vitamin B12 is a vitamin that can be hard for vegans to obtain as it is found in meat, which is
created by bacteria but is also added to fortified foods such as breakfast cereals. A supplement of B12 is the easiest way to make sure you do not lack it in
your diet.
Not only do vegans tend to be more well informed of what their body needs and what their food contains but avoiding meat and animal products can help
to virtually eliminate the most severe diseases such as cardiovascular disease, obesity, type 2 diabetes, diverticulosis and e.coli infections. A vegan diet can
be more beneficial to women as PMS symptoms become less intense or disappear altogether. This is due to the elimination of dairy from their diet.
Veganism helps the environment and helps to stop excess greenhouse gases. Over 70 billion land animals such as cows, pigs and chickens are specifically
bred, farmed and killed for food every year. This does not include sea creatures and other animals bred for fur and skin trades. The meat industry has a big
impact on the environment and how use our natural resources. 70% of the fresh water produced is used for the meat industry and takes 2500 gallons of
water for 1 pound of beef. This is equivalent to 100 pounds of wheat. 70% of the worlds grain harvest is fed to livestock while the other 30% is used for the
entire worlds population. Only 50% of grain harvest could feed all the starving people in the world if only people would stop eating meat.
4. “With a success of 3,200 people ready
to commit in January 2014”
• https://faunalytics.org/feature-
article/veganuary-2014-report/
• With this reference the information provided
seems relatively accurate.
5. “vegans eat a lot more fruit than
omnivores”
• https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/P
MC3967195/
• According to this source vegans do consume
more fruit and vegetables on average than
omnivores.
6. “A vegan diet can be more beneficial to women as PMS
symptoms become less intense or disappear altogether. This is
due to the elimination of dairy from their diet”
• https://medium.com/clued-in/no-meat-no-
problem-the-effect-of-veganism-and-
vegetarianism-on-the-menstrual-cycle-
d78cb32a5245#.1tka4wbkb
• According to this website it is true that the
vegan diet does help to reduce several
symptoms of PMS and may therefore be
beneficial to them.
7. “Veganism Veganism helps the environment and
helps to stop excess greenhouse gases”
• https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/20
10/jul/18/vegetarianism-save-planet-
environment
• This source suggests that being vegan does
have a positive impact on the environment
8. “70% of the fresh water produced is
used for the meat industry”
• http://www.worldwatch.org/peak-meat-
production-strains-land-and-water-resources-
1
• According to this source this it would be more
accurate to refer to the industry responsible
for 70% of fresh water use as the agriculture
industry however apart from that it seems to
be accurate.
9. “Takes 2500 gallons for 1 pound of
beef”
• http://www.peta.org/videos/meat-wastes-
water/
• This website uses the statistic that 1 pound of
beef uses 2400 gallons of water but the
figures are close so the information is relitivly
accurate.
10. “70% of the worlds grain harvest is fed to livestock
while the other 30% is used for the entire worlds
population”
• http://www.earthsave.org/environment.htm
• This source claims that the information
provided is accurate
11. “Only 50% of grain harvest could feed all the starving people in
the world if only people would stop eating meat”
• http://www.earthsave.org/environment.htm
• This source backs up the information provided
in the article.
13. “to help encourage people to try
vegan for January”
• I have altered the grammar of this sentence so
that it is more clear.
• “to help encourage more people to try a
vegan diet in January”
14. “Vegans get the most amount of nutrients they can
from their food and are keen to make sure they know
how to get everything they need such as iron”
• I have changed the grammar in this sentence
slightly so that it is more clear to read.
• “Vegans try to get all of the nutrients they can
from their food and are usually very conscious
of the foods that will provide all of the things
that they need”
15. “e.coli”
• I have changes the spelling of this word to the
correct one given when I searched I up.
• “E. coli”
17. Why have I made additions
• The optimum word count for the article was
around 500 words and the original document
was only 432 words long. Therefore I felt as if
the article needed a few more words to bring
it up to the 500 word mark.
18. • Original: “However, vitamin B12 is a vitamin that can be hard for vegans to
obtain as it is found in meat, which is created by bacteria but is also added
to fortified foods such as breakfast cereals. A supplement of B12 is the
easiest way to make sure you do not lack it in your diet”
• Updated: “However, vitamin B12 is a vitamin that can be hard for vegans
to obtain as it is found in meat, which is created by bacteria but is also
added to fortified foods such as breakfast cereals. This means that you
would have to eat a large amount of fortified cereals in order to achieve
your RDA. A supplement of B12 is the easiest way to make sure you do not
lack it in your diet as you can control the amount you need and not be
restricted in the food you have every day.
• This increased the word count to 474 words.
19. • Original: “Veganism is a widely controversial way of living that seeks to exclude the
exploitation of animals for food, clothing, testing and entertainment. Veganuary is
a global campaign that launched in January 2014 to help encourage people to try
vegan for January. With a success of 3,200 people ready to commit in January
2014, the campaign has gone from strength to strength to help raise awareness of
this lifestyle”
• Updated:” Veganism is a widely controversial way of living that seeks to exclude
the exploitation of animals for food, clothing, testing and entertainment.
Veganuary is a global campaign that launched in January 2014 to help encourage
more people to try vegan diet in January. With a success of 3,200 people ready to
commit in January 2014, the campaign has gone from strength to strength to help
raise awareness of this lifestyle. Its shorter timescale of a month makes the event
almost like a short diet or trial run of being vegan and therefore makes the event
more achievable and realistic for more people”
• This altered the word count to 508
20. Updated article - 508 words
Veganism is a widely controversial way of living that seeks to exclude the exploitation of animals for food, clothing, testing and entertainment. Veganuary is
a global campaign that launched in January 2014 to help encourage more people to try vegan diet in January. With a success of 3,200 people ready to
commit in January 2014, the campaign has gone from strength to strength to help raise awareness of this lifestyle. Its shorter timescale of a month makes
the event almost like a short diet or trial run of being vegan and therefore makes the event more achievable and realistic for more people
Veganism not only helps to reduce the suffering of animals and help the planet but also improves personal health. Due to the fact vegans do not eat animals
or their products, they must find the essential nutrients they need from plant based sources, vegan alternatives and fortified foods. This means that vegans
eat a lot more fruits and vegetables than omnivores. Vegans try to get all of the nutrients they can from their food and are usually very conscious of the
foods that will provide all of the things that they need. However, vitamin B12 is a vitamin that can be hard for vegans to obtain as it is found in meat, which
is created by bacteria but is also added to fortified foods such as breakfast cereals. This means that you would have to eat a large amount of fortified cereals
in order to achieve your RDA. A supplement of B12 is the easiest way to make sure you do not lack it in your diet as you can control the amount you need
and not be restricted in the food you have every day.
Not only do vegans tend to be more well informed of what their body needs and what their food contains but avoiding meat and animal products can help
to virtually eliminate the most severe diseases such as cardiovascular disease, obesity, type 2 diabetes, diverticulosis and E. coli infections. A vegan diet can
be more beneficial to women as PMS symptoms become less intense or disappear altogether. This is due to the elimination of dairy from their diet.
Veganism helps the environment and helps to stop excess greenhouse gases. Over 70 billion land animals such as cows, pigs and chickens are specifically
bred, farmed and killed for food every year. This does not include sea creatures and other animals bred for fur and skin trades. The meat industry has a big
impact on the environment and how use our natural resources. 70% of the fresh water produced is used for the meat industry and takes 2500 gallons of
water for 1 pound of beef. This is equivalent to 100 pounds of wheat. 70% of the worlds grain harvest is fed to livestock while the other 30% is used for the
entire worlds population. Only 50% of grain harvest could feed all the starving people in the world if only people would stop eating meat.
