The document outlines the 5 stages of partnership development: 1) First Contact, 2) Power Struggle, 3) Cooperation, 4) Synergy, and 5) Completion. Each stage is described in detail, including essential skills for success and things to avoid at each stage. Developing a partnership requires effort and roles will shift as the partnership balances core values and allergies.

1. Partnership
Development
An overview of Stages and Essential behaviors

2. 5 Stages in Partnership
Development
 Hierarchical level – stepwise development
 You have to go through a stage before entering the next
 5 Stages:
 First Contact
 Power Struggle
 Cooperation
 Synergy
 Completion
 Developing partnership requires effort
 Roles will shift balancing on the core values and
core allergies within the partnership
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3. Stage 1: First Contact
 This stage of relationships is characterized by a fascination with
the other organization or project or person and a desire to learn
more about them, as well as a desire to share things about your
own organisation.
 It's new, it’s fun and it feels good. This is the time when positive
possibilities are sensed and explored.
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4. Stage1: First Contact
Essential Skills for success
 Be interested, not merely interesting Active listening
 Look for and focus on the best in others, e.g Imagining people at a party
 Acknowledge/compliment others on the good you see in them and their accomplishments Even
your allergy can be a means to discover their core competencies
 Help people to relax with you - put them at ease
 Know what the most important things are for people to know about you and weave those things
into your conversations so you feel they "get" who you are. Be transparant
 To simply "be" with others without an agenda and be authentic
 Keep your word to build trust
 Dress to show respect
 Speech acts to learn and master: Greeting, Making requests, Declining requests, Making
promises, Making apologies, High performance listening
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5. Stage 1: First Contact
What to avoid:
 Lying
 The need to be seen as… (better, competent, interested, ..)
 Jumping to conclusions verify your assumptions
 To AssUMe is making an Ass out of U and Me
 Moving too quickly into a commitment conversation
 Expecting people to read your mind and anticipate your conditions
for satisfaction
 Keeping people in the dark about your mind by explaining how you
think and what you are thinking
 Stereotyping or categorizing
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6. Stage 2: Power Struggle
 This is the stage where organisations and people start testing
each other. Who is going to get whose way and how?
 This stage is really about building trust.
 Distrust from your unresolved past will manifest
 Often a fear of loss of control; heavy judgments of the other
partner start to show up.
 It is one of the most difficult stages. Many organisations and
people never move beyond this stage and partnerships many
end here.
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7. Stage 2: Power Struggle
Essential Skills for success
 Communicate without blame and control your temper
 Self-reflection:
 observe your thoughts, feelings and behaviours without judgment;
 know and identify your feelings and speak congruently with your emotions
 Observe your automatic interpretations of others and events
 Be present to someone else’s upset without defence
 Know and articulate your requirements for trust
 Be able to restore trust when broken and use current upsets to resolve the past
 Ask for help
 Forgive yourself and others
 Own/take responsibility for your mistakes and make correction without invalidation
 Take the initiative - be responsible for your own needs
 Turn complaints into requests
 Be clear-headed and rational while feeling intense feelings or while in the presence of others intense
feelings
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8. Stage 2: Power Struggle
What to avoid:
 Giving ultimatums
 Blaming others
 Gossiping or participating in gossip
 Being mean, attacking, hurtful or hypercritical
 Saying things you'll regret
 Don't control others or make their choices for them
 Don't sacrifice - be generous
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9. Stage 3: Cooperation
 This is the stage where you learn to trust both one another and
your ability to resolve upsets to your mutual satisfaction and
benefit.
 You learn to share power and appreciate each other's unique
abilities and gifts. However, it is still self oriented - "What can I
get out of this partnership?" rather than "What can we create
with this partnership?"
 Beware of false cooperation in which one organisation keeps
quiet to the other in order to "keep the peace". This form of
Cooperation is still Power Struggle, only in a more subtle form.
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10. Stage 3: Cooperation
Essential Skills for success
 Know and articulate the essence of your organisational objectives and desires
 Assess trustworthiness in others and assume trust rather than suspicion
 Inspire high level of trust from others
 Care deeply and feel connected with your partner; Read others emotions
 Generate enthusiasm
 Find and define a common path; Ability to articulate higher path, especially during
stress
 Know and articulate how others affect you, e.g., their losing/winning,
problems/thriving
 Make choices for long-term gains - overcome the need for instant gratification
 Competency with creation techniques, e.g., visualization, goal setting, etc.
 Know and articulate changing conditions for satisfaction
 Neutralize competition while inspiring cooperation
 Be diplomatic and cordial even when worried, upset and during stress
 Facilitate conversations for: Speculation and possibility, Planning and design,
Commitment and action
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11. Stage 3: Cooperation
What to avoid:
 Making assumptions
 Sacrifice - it always leads to resentment
 Withholding important communication out of fear
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12. Stage 4: Synergy
 This is the stage where there is a realization of a power greater
than that of each individual organisation or person
 There is also a commitment to a specified focus and the use of
the mutual power.
 Extraordinary satisfaction, intimacy, and a deep sense of mutual
trust, empowerment and ease characterize this stage.
 It is a highly creative, high performance relationship. It also
possesses a high level of acknowledgment and appreciation.
The relationship emanates joy and power in this stage.
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13. Stage 4: Synergy
Essential Skills for success
 Regenerate creativity.
 Balance work and play Engage in after work activities with your partner
 Be alert to and neutralize complacency
 Fine tune and evolve specific talents
 Recognize the times of chaos before new beginnings
 Be as committed to the larger process you are involved in as you are to
your own individual organisation
 Practice letting the relationship "breathe”, e.g. with changes ahead
 Anticipate a temporary Power Struggle when you level up commitment
and prepare for that
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14. Stage 4: Synergy
What to avoid:
 Taking the relationship and people for granted
 Becoming overly intoxicated with the glory of synergy and get
out of balance in your life
 Expecting synergy to last without nurturing the relationship
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15. Stage 5: Completion
 This is a stage many organisation fear and avoid dealing with
altogether
 There are four ways relationships can be completed:
 Drifting apart
 Expulsion
 Conscious completion
 Unexpected end
 Sometimes completion is only about changing the form of the
relationship, not necessarily the end of the relationship
altogether
 A new Partnership Alliance is designed
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16. Stage 5: Completion
Essential Skills for success
 Accept change and follow its flow
 Acknowledge and integrate the value and the learning in the relationship
 Own up to mistakes without self-invalidation
 Make apologies
 Redefine your common path - change form
 Know what you need to feel complete
 Generate a safe space and a conversation to make sure everything that
needs to be said or done to feel complete is communicated in a spirit of
respect and dignity for all parties concerned
 Allow for a healthy expression of fear, anger, grief or any other emotion
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17. Stage 5: Completion
What to avoid:
 Feeling victimized
 Taking things too personally (sometimes we are only extras in
someone else movie)
 Resisting change
 Misperceiving that others are the source of your good or
happiness
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