Overindulgence is an issue many people face in our society as the research and subsequent literature has shown us. While society tells us we need more on a regular basis, parents and children alike are struggling to understand how much is enough and adults who were given too much as children often feel the effects. What is overindulgence? Three ways parents overindulge Tools to reduce overindulgence (The Test of Four) Online course offerings

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militaryfamilieslearningnetwork.org/event/22032
Overindulgence in Parenting:
How Much is Too Much?
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2. Connecting military family service providers
and Cooperative Extension professionals to research
and to each other through engaging online learning opportunities
militaryfamilieslearningnetwork.org
MFLN Intro
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militaryfamilieslearningnetwork.org/event/22032
Overindulgence in Parenting:
How Much is Too Much?
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4. Ellie Mc Cann
• UMN Extension Educator and Professor
• MA in Human Development and Family Studies
• Teaches the Parents Forever program & Parenting
in the Age of Overindulgence online course
Today’s Presenters
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Becky Hagen Jokela
• UMN Extension Educator and Professor
• B.S. & M.S. in Family and Consumer Science Ed
• Accredited Financial Counselor

5. © 2018 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved.
Overindulgence Team
Jean IllsleyClarke Becky Hagen Jokela Kelly Kunkel Ellie McCann
Mary Jo KatrasLisa Krause
David Bredehoft
Dung Mao Kate Welshons:
Community Program
Specialist
Connie Dawson
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6. © 2018 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved.
LEARNING OBJECTIVES
▪ What is overindulgence in parenting
▪ What adults who have been overindulged
say
▪ How to counter overindulgence
▪ Online course offerings
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WE HAVE A QUESTION WE WOULD LIKE YOU TO
RESPOND TO…
In your experience
does overindulgence
come up….
▪ Seldom
▪ Sometimes
▪ Frequently
Please choose your response in the small window
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OVERINDULGENCE
“Giving children too much of
what looks good, too soon
and for too long.”
Illsley Clarke, J., Dawson, C, and Bredehoft, D. (2014). How Much is too Much: Raising Likeable, Responsible,
Respectful Children. Boston (p.5), MA: Da Capo Press
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WHICH OF THESE CHILDREN COULD BE
OVERINDULGED?
(1)
By Ragesoss [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC BY-SA 4.0 (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0)], from Wikimedia Commons
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(2)
Hmong kid in a small village / Nikkodem / CC BY-NC-SA 2.0 / www.flickr.com/photos/nikkodem/4048948409
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(3)
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(4)
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http://www.eveandersson.com

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(5) https://pixnio.com/people/children-kids/cute-african-american-boy-playing-in-backyard
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WHAT IS OVERINDULGENCE?
▪ Too much, too soon and too long
▪ Not appropriate for age or interests and talents
▪ Adult’s needs more than the child’s
▪ Disproportionate amount of family resources
▪ Form of child neglect
▪ Hinders developmental tasks or life lessons
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THREE TYPES OF OVERINDULGENCE
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https://www.flickr.com/photos/awholelotofnothing/2212965609/Angie/Flickr
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UMN Extension stock photos
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Kite Flying at Port Dickson CC BY-NC 2.0 www.flickr.com/photos/finepixel/243180407
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WHAT IS THE RESEARCH BEHIND
PARENTING IN THE AGE OF
OVERINDULGENCE?
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ADULT OVERINDULGENCE STATEMENTS
▪ I feel sad and angry when I don’t get my way or
don’t get what I want.
▪ I often feel disappointed in others, let down by
them, the more I give the more I expect.
▪ I am so far in debt I can’t see the light of day.
▪ I am overweight, discontent, overdo, and still feel
empty.
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STUDY VI
Factors Connecting Childhood Overindulgence
and Adult Life Aspirations
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The MOST important aspirations for
overindulged children in adulthood are
extrinsic goals:
1. Wealth (to make the most money/wealth and
to own expensive possessions)
2. Fame (to be famous and admired by many
people)
3. Image (to have people comment on how
attractive and stylish they are
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The LEAST important aspirations for
overindulged children in adulthood are
intrinsic goals:
1.Meaningful relationships (to share life with
someone they love in a committed relationship)
2.Personal growth (to learn new things and have a
meaningful life)
3.Community contributions (to work for the
betterment of society and to help others without
anything in return)
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Risky Gifts
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RISKY GIFTS
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ACTIVITY
1. Choose one of the Risky Gifts
2. How will the gift affect their job performance?
3. How will their teammates/colleagues feel about
working with them?
4. What type(s) of overindulgence did the gift
come from?
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WHY PARENTS OVERINDULGE
▪ Often hear that it is because of affluence, or
parents give what they didn’t have...
– while studies indicate that overindulging can happen at
any income level
▪ Grandparents/others can overindulge, too
▪ Overindulgence comes from a good heart!
*All parents overindulge. It’s about balance and the unintended outcomes.
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OVERINDULGENCE IN FINANCES
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TEST OF FOUR
▪ Does it get in the way of the child learning a
developmental task? Which one(s)?
▪ Does it use a disproportionate amount of
family resources?
▪ Is this more for the parent than the child?
▪ Does it harm others?
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OVERINDULGENCE IN
HEALTH AND NUTRITION
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OVERINDULGENCE IN PARENTING
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Please share examples of
overindulgence within the context
of a military family
Your Turn!
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WE HAVE A QUESTION WE WOULD LIKE YOU TO
RESPOND TO…
Now, that you are
more familiar with
overindulgence,
In your experience
does overindulgence
come up….
▪ Seldom
▪ Sometimes
▪ Frequently
Please choose your response in the small window.
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ONLINE COURSES
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The University of Minnesota is an equal opportunity educator and employer. This PowerPoint is available in alternative formats
upon request. Direct requests to XXX-XXX-XXXX.
Thank you!
https://z.umn.edu/overindulgence
For more information please contact:
Ellie McCann Becky Hagen Jokela
mccan023@umn.edu hagen022@umn.edu
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