The document emphasizes that negotiation is a daily practice and everything is negotiable, yet many people, particularly women, hesitate due to fears of damaging relationships or questioning their worth. It highlights the differences in negotiation styles between men and women, with men often being more direct and assertive, while women may prioritize relationships and hesitate to ask for what they want. It also provides practical tips for effective negotiation preparation and strategies, encouraging individuals to be themselves, seek mentorship, and actively listen during discussions.

2. Everyday you negotiate!
0 Even if you don’t think about it that way – you still
negotiate throughout your day
0 No one is born a skilled negotiator – it takes practice
0 Remember:
0Everything is negotiable
0 Female vs Male negotiation styles do differ
0 There are resources to help you learn to negotiate
confidently
0 You can overcome the common mistakes made in
negotiating

3. Why don’t we negotiate?
0 We don’t want to offend
0 We want/need to be friends with everyone
0 It upsets the balance
0 Hard to separate personal vs business
0 We don’t want to disagree
0 Concerned what others think
0 Question our own value; Am I worth it?

4. Everything is negotiable
0 Almost everything is life is negotiable if you see it
that way
0 Opportunities to negotiate exist in almost every
interaction
0 You’re probably better at it than you think!

5. Female vs Male Negotiation Styles
0 Do any of these sound familiar?
0 Not asking for what you want for fear of damaging a
relationship
0 Being hesitant about saying no because you’d like to
keep everyone happy
0 Having much greater success at negotiating for
someone else than your self
0 Getting flustered and emotional if a negotiation gets
heated
0 Thinking the louder, tougher or smarter you are the
better your chance at negotiation success

6. Men & Women have different
negotiation styles
0 Women value relationships over outcome
0 Men leverage relationships to achieve goals
0 Women make decisions based on what they feel they
need rather than what they are worth
0 Men are more likely to ask for what they want
0 Women are more likely to wait to be recognised
0 Men talk for longer and interrupt more often!
0 Men use more direct language
0 Men tend to display more confidence than
women in performance oriented settings
0 Women tend to set more modest goals

7. Handy female instincts
0 Negotiation is about relationships….and girls are
good at relationships!
0 Perception is a stronger natural instinct in females
than males
0Picking up non-verbal signals (body language)
0For the first 2 years or so females need to communicate
with children who cannot use language
0 Negotiation is ultimately an exercise in two-way
communication
0 Needs exist on both sides of the table
0 Perspectives, ideas and feelings differ
0 Shared understanding = mutual solutions

8. When is it worth it?
0 While everything might be negotiable, you don’t want
to negotiate about everything
0 The key….. YOU decide what’s worth negotiating
0 Identify & clarify your personal & professional goals
0 If you’re heart’s not in it, you’re less likely to be
successful

9. Dissection of a negotiation
0 Negotiation is based on how important something is
to two parties: yourself and the other negotiator
0 Research is a critical yet hidden component
0 Two-way communication process
0Demands & concessions (give and take)
0 Precedents: what went before
0 Experience: how often you’ve done this
0 Personality traits and confidence
0 Other parties: mediators, third-parties
0 Outcomes: immediate and/or ongoing

10. Tips for stronger negotiation

11. 10 steps before the conversation
STEP WHAT
CONTENT
Step 1 Ascertain the scope of the exchange
Step 2 Determine the negotiation objectives
Step 3 Examine suppositions of both parties
Step 4 Collect relevant data
Step 5 Identify issues, sticking points and trade-offs
Step 6 Calculate preliminary bargaining position & ground rules
PROCESS
Step 7 Reveal other side’s needs & examine your own
Step 8 Produce your overall bargaining strategy
Step 9 Determine possible negotiating options: BATNA (see next)
Step 10 Enter into negotiations

12. What is BATNA?
0 Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement
0Draft in advance
0 Think like the other party – what’s most important to them,
where are they most likely to compromise
0 Equally – what’s more important to you, where would you
be willing to compromise to give the other party a ‘win’

13. Before the conversation
60% of the negotiation occurs
before the conversation starts!
The best
negotiators do
their pre-work
meticulously

14. Preparation builds confidence
0 Identify what it is you actually want
0 Prepare your arguments in advance based on
objective research
0 Bring your notes in with you or send an agenda
outlining your key points in advance
0 In a business setting, try to tie your desired outcomes
with the objectives of the team or company
0Not “ you say as a company that you respect work/life
balance so give me a four day week”
0 What would you say instead?

15. Think collaboration –
Not confrontation
0 Mutual goals or win-win
0 Understand not just your needs but those of the other side
0 Have pre-prepared your give and take
0 What is a nice to have that you are prepared to compromise on if
needed?
0 Getting fired up and emotional can lead to an adverse
outcome
0 Challenges are predictable: anticipate how the other
person/party is likely to react and think about specific
ways to respond

16. Be Yourself!
0 Common mistakes:
0 Adopting a negotiation style that does not reflect who you
are (one you are not comfortable with)
0 People see through you if you’re trying to be something
you are not (you will look weak)
0 You can be quiet and calm but still be strong
0 You can disagree politely (no need for aggression)

17. Engaging & gaining buy-in
0 The best negotiations are exercises in two-way
conversations
0 Active listening, asking questions, reinforcing your
desire for a mutually beneficial outcome
0Making sure the other party is being heard is a sign of
respect
0 Show appreciation for differences in perspective
0 “let me clarify that I understand where you are coming
from”

18. Avoiding clichés & disclaimers
0 Don’t use jargon and clichés
0 Table thumping and aggression
rarely work and are just
embarrassing
0 “I think…”, “I feel…” are less
forceful terms than “It’s clear
that…” or “The market shows us
that….”

19. Stay focused & on target
0 Keep to the point – don’t deviate
0 Ask for more time to consider if you need to
0You usually don’t have to make a decision to accept an offer
immediately
0 One conversation might not culminate in the final decision
0 Remember - negotiation is a process

20. Seek a mentor
0 Learn from someone who displays
outstanding negotiation skills
0 Use this as an opportunity to practice
0 Role play your negotiations prior to
conducting them
0Ask your mentor for objective feedback
0 A little pep talk can do wonders for
your confidence!

21. Common mistakes
0 Not being willing to say no
0No is the most powerful word in negotiating!
0Successful negotiators know when & how to say no
0 Prepare properly, know your options, be flexible and be
realistic
0 Remember that saying no isn’t personal
0 You must be able to disagree rather than give in to
something that is contrary to your interests but you can be
flexible in how to satisfy your interests
0 Not negotiating well when it’s for yourself
0 Negotiate for yourself as if you were negotiating for
someone else (your colleagues, your kids, your family)

22. 0 Ask for It: How Women Can Use the Power of
Negotiation to Get What They Really Want
(Linda Babcock & Sara Laschever)
0 www.careerwomen.com
0 www.negotiations.com