Maximize Your Impact
Mentor Training
Mentoring Partnership of Minnesota
MPM IS THE DRIVING FORCE
IN THE MENTORING
MOVEMENT IN MINNESOTA.
WE BRING TOGETHER
DIVERSE INDIVIDUALS AND
ORGANIZATIONS AROUND
TWO STRATEGIC GOALS:

•MPM will Increase Quality
Mentoring in Minnesota

•MPM is the Leading
Champion of Quality
Mentoring Across Minnesota


                                 2
Mentor Training Process
                 1.   Listen to this training
                      module
                 2.   Respond to survey
April Riordan,
Director of
                 3.   Participate in live training
Training and
Community
                 4.   Be a mentor!
Partnerships




                                                     3
                                                         3
Match items with similar functions
                                         Disposable, trash, cheap, lost &
                                         forgotten, thrown out, flimsy, lower
                                         quality, doesn’t last




 Sustainable, reusable, investment,
 valuable, would go back for it, don’t
 throw it out, strong, sturdy, durable

                                                                                4
Quality = Longer Stronger Matches

   Quality Mentors
   1. Support organizational & program
      values
   2. Keep young people safe
   3. Understand youth development
   4. Use a strength-based, youth-
      centered approach
   5. Model healthy life skills


                                         5
PYD: all young people have strengths
    Role of mentoring is not to FIX young people
    but rather to help them achieve their potential.




                                                                                   http://www.search-institute.org/mentoring




•   MENTOR Research In Action; Issue 1 - Mentoring: A Key Resource for Promoting Positive Youth
    Development;Richard M. Lerner, Ph.D., Aerika S. Brittian, and Kristen E. Fay, Tufts University
                                                                                                                               6
External Assets


                      Boundaries
       Support           and
                     Expectations



                     Constructive
       Empowerment     Use of
                        Time




                                    7
Internal Assets



      Commitment         Social Competencies
      to Learning




       Positive Values   Positive Identity




                                               8
Maximize Your Impact

 Build longer, stronger relationships
   • Focus on what is strong not what is wrong
   • Pay attention to what mentees would like
     for themselves – not just what we think
     they need
   • Teach and model skills to help young
     people carry their baggage better




                                                 9
Letter to Mama
 XXXX XXXXXXX - ####
 Minnesota Correctional Facility-
    Shakopee
 1010 West Sixth Avenue
 Shakopee, MN 55379                                    I miss you Mama. At parent
                                               night, some boys asked me where
                                               my mom was and why my Gramma
     Dear Mama,                                was with me. I told them you were
            We are writing letters in school   in jail. They asked what you did to
     today. My teacher says I am a good        go to jail and I just told the truth
     speller and that I have nice              and said I don’t know.
     handwriting. Do you think so?                     I wish you could come to my
            We had our Valentine Party on      basketball games. I’m really fast and
     Friday. Gramma bought Valentines          am getting better at shooting.
     for me and we sat at the kitchen table            When can I come visit you
     and put them together. During the         again? I miss you. Write me back
     party with all the other 3rd graders,     soon!
     Jessica spilled juice on her Valentines
     and had to throw them all away. She
     was so sad. I gave her some of my                         Love,
     candy.                                                   Shayna



 *This is a fictitious letter.                                                         10
Strong Not Wrong
• Deficit-Based Mentor        • Strength-Based Mentor
  Agenda                        Agenda
  – Improve basketball          – Attend a basketball game
    shooting skills             – Spelling games
  – Seek therapist for mom      – Volunteering
    issues
  – Ask questions about her
    father




                                                         11
Darren wants to get better grades
  But RIGHT NOW, he wants to play video
  games and beat the record he set the last
  time he was at your house. He told you
  earlier that he has a paper due the day after
  tomorrow. Which is a more youth centered
  response?
       A.Play video games.
       B.Work on the paper.
       C.Something in between
       D.Both
       E.It depends

                                                  12
Mentors can’t carry it for them-
 BAGGAGE




            But mentors CAN teach and
             model skills to help young
              people carry it BETTER.



                                          13
Maximize Your Impact
• Your young person plays
  basketball on her school
  team. Her basketball
  teammates are all buying
  the same pair of
  basketball shoes for the
  new season and her old
  shoes no longer fit. At
  one of your meetings,
  she talks to you privately
  and asks if you can help
  her out and lend her
  some money. How can
  you maximize your
  impact as a mentor?

                               14
Maximize Your Impact
• Your mentee’s teachers
  say that he doesn’t listen
  during class and that
  when they try to talk to
  him, he won’t say a word.
  He started the school year
  very excited but now
  hates to go and his
  grades are suffering.
  Today, he got suspended
  after getting in a fist fight
  with another student. You
  are scheduled to meet
  with him tonight. How can
  you maximize your impact
  as a mentor?
                                  15
Maximize Your Impact

 Build longer, stronger relationships
   • Focus on what is strong not what is wrong
   • Pay attention to what mentees would like
     for themselves – not just what we think
     they need
   • Teach and model skills to help young
     people carry their baggage better




                                             16
A lost child tells of a dream…
     In the dream, he is stuck in a
     pitch-dark room, helpless and
     confused, awkwardly feeling his
     way around. His mentor is there
     too in the dream, and knows just
     where the light switch is. But
     instead of turning it on, the
     mentor waits, then aims the
     beam of a flashlight at the switch.
      It’s the job of the child to do the rest.

Liu, Eric; Guiding Lights: The People Who Lead Us Toward
Our Purpose in Life, Random House, New York, 2004.         17

Maximize Your Impact - Thomson Reuters

  • 1.
  • 2.
    Mentoring Partnership ofMinnesota MPM IS THE DRIVING FORCE IN THE MENTORING MOVEMENT IN MINNESOTA. WE BRING TOGETHER DIVERSE INDIVIDUALS AND ORGANIZATIONS AROUND TWO STRATEGIC GOALS: •MPM will Increase Quality Mentoring in Minnesota •MPM is the Leading Champion of Quality Mentoring Across Minnesota 2
  • 3.
    Mentor Training Process 1. Listen to this training module 2. Respond to survey April Riordan, Director of 3. Participate in live training Training and Community 4. Be a mentor! Partnerships 3 3
  • 4.
    Match items withsimilar functions Disposable, trash, cheap, lost & forgotten, thrown out, flimsy, lower quality, doesn’t last Sustainable, reusable, investment, valuable, would go back for it, don’t throw it out, strong, sturdy, durable 4
  • 5.
    Quality = LongerStronger Matches Quality Mentors 1. Support organizational & program values 2. Keep young people safe 3. Understand youth development 4. Use a strength-based, youth- centered approach 5. Model healthy life skills 5
  • 6.
    PYD: all youngpeople have strengths Role of mentoring is not to FIX young people but rather to help them achieve their potential. http://www.search-institute.org/mentoring • MENTOR Research In Action; Issue 1 - Mentoring: A Key Resource for Promoting Positive Youth Development;Richard M. Lerner, Ph.D., Aerika S. Brittian, and Kristen E. Fay, Tufts University 6
  • 7.
    External Assets Boundaries Support and Expectations Constructive Empowerment Use of Time 7
  • 8.
    Internal Assets Commitment Social Competencies to Learning Positive Values Positive Identity 8
  • 9.
    Maximize Your Impact Build longer, stronger relationships • Focus on what is strong not what is wrong • Pay attention to what mentees would like for themselves – not just what we think they need • Teach and model skills to help young people carry their baggage better 9
  • 10.
    Letter to Mama XXXX XXXXXXX - #### Minnesota Correctional Facility- Shakopee 1010 West Sixth Avenue Shakopee, MN 55379 I miss you Mama. At parent night, some boys asked me where my mom was and why my Gramma Dear Mama, was with me. I told them you were We are writing letters in school in jail. They asked what you did to today. My teacher says I am a good go to jail and I just told the truth speller and that I have nice and said I don’t know. handwriting. Do you think so? I wish you could come to my We had our Valentine Party on basketball games. I’m really fast and Friday. Gramma bought Valentines am getting better at shooting. for me and we sat at the kitchen table When can I come visit you and put them together. During the again? I miss you. Write me back party with all the other 3rd graders, soon! Jessica spilled juice on her Valentines and had to throw them all away. She was so sad. I gave her some of my Love, candy. Shayna *This is a fictitious letter. 10
  • 11.
    Strong Not Wrong •Deficit-Based Mentor • Strength-Based Mentor Agenda Agenda – Improve basketball – Attend a basketball game shooting skills – Spelling games – Seek therapist for mom – Volunteering issues – Ask questions about her father 11
  • 12.
    Darren wants toget better grades But RIGHT NOW, he wants to play video games and beat the record he set the last time he was at your house. He told you earlier that he has a paper due the day after tomorrow. Which is a more youth centered response? A.Play video games. B.Work on the paper. C.Something in between D.Both E.It depends 12
  • 13.
    Mentors can’t carryit for them- BAGGAGE But mentors CAN teach and model skills to help young people carry it BETTER. 13
  • 14.
    Maximize Your Impact •Your young person plays basketball on her school team. Her basketball teammates are all buying the same pair of basketball shoes for the new season and her old shoes no longer fit. At one of your meetings, she talks to you privately and asks if you can help her out and lend her some money. How can you maximize your impact as a mentor? 14
  • 15.
    Maximize Your Impact •Your mentee’s teachers say that he doesn’t listen during class and that when they try to talk to him, he won’t say a word. He started the school year very excited but now hates to go and his grades are suffering. Today, he got suspended after getting in a fist fight with another student. You are scheduled to meet with him tonight. How can you maximize your impact as a mentor? 15
  • 16.
    Maximize Your Impact Build longer, stronger relationships • Focus on what is strong not what is wrong • Pay attention to what mentees would like for themselves – not just what we think they need • Teach and model skills to help young people carry their baggage better 16
  • 17.
    A lost childtells of a dream… In the dream, he is stuck in a pitch-dark room, helpless and confused, awkwardly feeling his way around. His mentor is there too in the dream, and knows just where the light switch is. But instead of turning it on, the mentor waits, then aims the beam of a flashlight at the switch. It’s the job of the child to do the rest. Liu, Eric; Guiding Lights: The People Who Lead Us Toward Our Purpose in Life, Random House, New York, 2004. 17