The student received feedback on their pitch for a music product. The feedback noted the student's strong research on artistic techniques and linking their band's theme. It suggested expanding vocabulary, explicitly linking to the target audience, and including mockups of the proposed digipak and advertisement. In response, the student agreed to include missing pieces, research the suggested areas, and create mockups to strengthen their pitch.

1. Post-16 Feedback Form
Focus:
Pitch Feedback
Strengths:
1. A good link to your genre with explicit links to show how your product would be
unique.
2. You have researched artistic techniques and artists well which then linked to your
current band’s theme well. (Links between both your digipak and your
advertisement)
3. Very detailed and mostly fluent speech that showed the time and effort you put into
it.
Areas for improvement:
1. Expand your vocabulary – you confused that / what quite a lot and relied heavily on
‘also’ and ‘I feel…’.
2. There were no explicit links to your target audience which should be your main
focus.
3. Could have included a mock-up of your own digipak / magazine advertisement.
Resulting Actions (student response):
I should have included the pieces I forgot to and will research into these parts instead to try
and get some information about that part. I also will try to make a mock of the Digipak and
upload.