AUA Counceling Services Presenter: Yelena Sardaryan

1. Anger
Management
CENTER FOR STUDENTS SUCCESS
COUNSELING SERVICES
YELENA SARDARYAN, MPH,MA COUNSELOR

2. OUTLINE
Anger consequences
Anger
Rage
Aggression
Anger management tips
Communication and Listening Skills
Q/A session

3. Understanding Anger
Emotional and Mental aspects of Anger:
Anger is energy
Anger is a signal
Anger is a feeling; it is not a behavior
Anger is a normal emotion
Anger is a secondary emotion
Anger is a protective emotion

4. Anger Has Its Benefits
When anger is channeled properly, it can:
help a person to feel stronger and healthier;
be used to protect ourselves and our loved ones;
and/or
improve relationships by opening up lines of
communication.

5. Expressions and Types of
Anger
Anger can be expressed in the following ways:
Physical / Behavioral;
Emotional / Psychological;
Verbal / Non-verbal; and/or
Sexual
Types of Aggressive Behavior
Explosive outbursts
Exaggerated hostility
Aggressive body language
Passive-aggressive behaviors
Social withdrawal
Verbal abuse

6. External Consequences of Unresolved
Anger
Loss of friendships/ relationships
Loss of family
Loss of job
Legal troubles
Incarceration
Financial

7. Internal Consequences of
Unresolved Anger
FAILURE to recognize and understand anger may
lead to health problems such as:
◦Heart Problems
◦Anxiety
◦Tension
◦Headaches
◦High Blood Pressure
◦Upset Stomach
◦Fatigue
◦Obesity

8. UNRESOLVED ANGER MAY ALSO LEAD
TO:
Alcohol/Other Drug Use
Codependency
Love/Relationship Addiction
Sexual Addiction
Compulsive Overeating
Anorexia and/or Bulimia
Gambling
Workaholism
Compulsive Shopping
Internet Compulsion
Video Game Addiction

9. Anger Manifestations at
Different Levels
Important to identify the onset of anger. More manageable when at the
lower end of the scale.
Physical
Emotional
Behavioral
Cognitive
Discuss symptoms that resonate for participants.
Have them add symptoms that are not listed.

10. Anger, Aggression and Rage – What’s
the Difference? - pgs. 6-11
Anger
Aggression
Rage

11. Difference between
Anger and Rage
Anger is a tertiary process (higher-order cognitions/thoughts) requiring an
identifiable object and cognitive rational of blame.
Rage is the result of the activation of the primary RAGE system. It is instinctual
and uncontrollable once activated.

12. Aggression versus Rage
Aggression/Dominance/
Predation
Intentional
Exciting
Generally Feels Good
Can Be Reinforcing
Can Be Sought
Rage
•Reactionary
•Uncomfortable
•Can Be Frightening
•Generally Avoided

13. Anger Management Tips
Prevention is the main focus.
◦ Focus on “unmet needs,” otherwise the anger will resurface.
The more you understand your own anger, the more you will be able to
communicate your wants and needs.
1. Keep track of your anger – helps to identify patterns.
2. How relevant is your anger?
3. Anger as a protective emotion
4. Pay attention to your thoughts - When you are upset, your thoughts will
“sound” different to you.
◦ “He did it on purpose,” “She’s taking too long,” “He needs to see it my way,” or “Of
course he’s going to side with her; he always does.”

14. Anger Management Tips
5. Set healthy boundaries – Take care of yourself. Don’t constantly put others’
needs before your own.
6. Communicate assertively - Be clear in communicating what’s bothering you,
and ask for what you want. Refrain from communicating aggressively.
7. Check your expectations – We are bound to be disappointed when we set
unrealistic expectations of those around us. Instead of “You should…”, state “I
would like…..”
8. Deal with your anger at its earlier stages - Don’t wait until you can’t control
your anger. Work on your anger when it’s at a 5, or sooner.
9. Take responsibility – Don’t blame others for your anger. “You made me mad.”

15. Trigger Words and Phrases
Why questions
Comparing others
Bringing others into the conversation
Absolute words such as always, never, everyone,
or no one.
“I told you so”
You should or could have…
Giving advice
“I feel that you are ______”

16. Active Listening
Active listening
Giving feedback
Deepening the conversation
Bringing the conversation to a close

17. Active Listening
Encourage the person to talk: “You seem upset. Would you like
to discuss it? Sometimes talking helps.”
Active Listening posture - sit back, relax, and make eye contact.
This lets the other person know they are free to speak without
interruptions or being met with defensiveness.
Allow Silences: Even if the speaker pauses, don’t interrupt. Let
them gather their thoughts or get the courage to say something
they’ve been holding back.
Paraphrase / Restate- to check out your perceptions and
reassure the other person that you’ve been attending carefully,
summarize or paraphrase what they’ve been saying.

18. Harmful Listening Habits
Judging what the speaker is saying.
Assuming you know what the speaker will say.
Not keeping your own emotions in check about
what’s being discussed.
Interrupting the speaker.

19. Harmful Listening Habits (cont.)
Changing the subject without acknowledging.
Not acknowledging the person when they speak.
Looking distracted while a person is talking to you.
Put your phone away.
Trying to formulate your response instead of being
present with the speaker.

20. THANK YOU