Dr. William A. Howe will be presenting at the National Conference on "Skills to Manage Difficult Conversations" in Hartford, Connecticut from April 16-18, 2015. His presentation will focus on constructivist listening techniques. Research shows that college students today are 40% less empathetic than in 1979, with the steepest drop in the last 10 years. Simple, honest conversations where all parties feel heard can help create positive change when discussing experiences, hopes, and fears.

1. Skills to Manage Difficult Conversations
April 16–18 2015 National Conference
Hartford, Connecticut
Constructivist Listening

2. The Presenter
2
Dr. William A. Howe
CT State Department of Education
165 Capitol Avenue, Room 222
Hartford, CT 06106
Phone: (860) 713-6752
email: william.howe@ct.gov
http://billhowe.org/MCE/

3. Empathy Deficit
3
Researchers at the University of Michigan Institute for
Social Research reported that college students now
are 40 percent less empathetic than they were in
1979, with the steepest drop coming in the last 10 years.
Students today are generally less likely to describe
themselves as "soft-hearted" or have "tender concerned
feelings for others" and more likely to admit that "other
people's misfortunes" usually don't bother them.
(Boston Globe, Oct 17, 2010)

5. I Believe We Can Change the World if We
Start Listening to One Another Again.
5
Simple, honest, human conversation.
Not mediation, negotiation, problem solving,
debate, or public meetings. Simple, truthful
conversation where we each feel heard, and we
each listen well. This is how great changes begin,
when people begin talking to each other about
their experiences, hopes, and fears. “
From Turning to One Another: Simple Conversations to Restore Hope to the Future, by Margaret
Wheatley.

6. 6
“Most people don’t listen with
the intent to understand; they
listen with the intent to reply”
……… Stephen Covey

7. 7
80% of awake time is spent
communicating.
 We spend 45% of awake time
listening.
75% of the words are ignored,
misunderstood or forgotten
Most Adults Listen Actively for 17
seconds

8. Listening Techniques
Active Constructive
8
 The listener must
take care to attend to
the speaker fully,
and then repeats, in
the listener’s own
words, what he or
she thinks the
speaker has said.
 “I agree to listen and
think about what you
say in exchange for
you doing the same
for me.”

9. Constructivist Listening Guidelines
9
Each Person
• Has equal time to talk.
• Does not interrupt, give advice or break in
with a personal story.
• Agrees that confidentiality is maintained.
• Focus on what the speaker is saying
others

10. Difficult Conversations
10
Learning the words - how to talk
about
perspectives, perceptions
differences, and attitudes.

11. People of Color Vignette #6
11
During a radio interview with the author of a
book on Buddhist meditation practice, the
talk show host asked whether the author had
attempted to reach out to people of
color. The author responded by saying,
"Yes, I'm offering the meditation workshops
in both prisons and juvenile halls."
Question : Do you see any problem with
the author's response?

12. About
12
Bill Howe is the Education Consultant for
Multicultural Education at the Connecticut
State Department of Education. He is
Past-President of the National Association
for Multicultural Education (NAME) and
Past-Chair of the Connecticut Asian
Pacific American Affairs Commission.