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The Art of Conversation

English 3

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The Art of Conversation

  1. 1. Marie Kris A. Lazaro
  2. 2. What is Conversation? Do you love talking? How much talking do you indulge in every day? When people meet, what would they usually do? Yes, talking is something most people do everyday at home, in school, in the streets, at parties, in church, at table while eating. Practically everywhere many of our pleasant hours are spent in friendly conversations with our fellowmen. So ordinary is the activity that we often take it for granted. How many among you, for instance have given it some thought even just for once? For all we do not know, conversation is an art and being good at it is a skill that can be learned, enhance and perfected. It must be practiced intelligently to be mastered. It is not just a words. It s a complex interplay between people , an informal spoken exchange of thoughts and feelings involving many other signals, seen and implied. To master the art of conversation, there are requirements.
  3. 3. Conversation  informal interchange of thoughts, information, etc., by spoken w ords ; oral communication between persons  oral exchange of sentiments, observations, opinions, or ideas (2) : an instance of such exchange  an informal discussion of an issue by representatives of governments, institutions, or groups
  4. 4.  Basis of Good Conversation A. Sincere Interest in people and things about us Often times what triggers conversation is personal interest This can be addressed by showing interest in people, by being a close observer, by learning to listen by being thoughtful of others and by understanding the behavior revolves around the three fundamentals of human nature
  5. 5. 1. The importance of being important According to Pease, the desire to feel important is the strongest in man and is found to be higher than physiological needs. As Dewey says, “the greatest needs of human nature are to feel important, to be recognized and appreciated” So, the more important you make someone feel, the more positively s/he will respond. To do this, try the following techniques • Give sincere compliments • Listen attentively • Say thank you • Remember names
  6. 6. 2. People’s primary interest is in themselves Other people are solely interested in what concerns them, their family, friends, possessions, feelings and opinions. To successfully relate to them is to approach them with basic foundation of human relation what they think and what they want. If nobody ask about you and yours, they simply not interested, so don’t bring up. 3. Nature’s law of equal returns This law of nature that rarely fails- the urge to return to the giver something of equal to if not higher value than what was given. If a person likes what you give s/he is likely to reciprocate it with something you also like
  7. 7. B. Courtesy Conversation is a game of a two person. There is give and take. It is not a one-way ticket. The game is played according to the following rules 1. Feel a personal responsibility for the success of the game of conversation. Do your part to “keep the conversational ball rolling” 2. Try to be tactful. Rudeness has no place in conversation. Empathize. Be considerate of the feelings of others. “Loose lips may sink ships” 3. Try to bring to each person as much pleasure as possible talk about pleasant things. Fair words cost nothing
  8. 8. 4. Speak in a soft, pleasant, sympathetic ,well-modulated tone. Its nice to hear. 5. Avoid monopolizing the conversation. Do not be a star performer that overshadows the other players. Talkativeness is one thing. Speaking well is another. In the words of Prier “They never taste who always drink ; they always talk who never think” 6. Use your senses. Be keen. Be sensitive to the feelings of others
  9. 9. C. Contribute your share In the conversation game, like any other game, players have to take an active part. Or, they don’t play the game at all how? Rather than remain a quiet observer at the receiving end, participate in the exchange of ideas by contributing something worthwhile. Be counted. Feel free to share your experiences with others. Interesting lessons learned from your readings, conversation, travels, and from life itself will come in handy. That way, you don’t look aloof nor appear left out
  10. 10. III. Good manners in conversation Conversation, as an integral part of daily life, is an occasion for practicing good manners. They are the happy ways of doing things. And there is no substitute to being good even to those who are rude. Remember that you show courtesy to others not because they are gentle, but because you are Manners, with or without them, can make or unmake you as speaker. When and how to make introductions, for example, can be a problem if you don’t know the ropes. But found even much more difficult are joining and leaving conversation
  11. 11. To show courtesy, it pays to do the following a. Be attentive. Listen b. Maintain eye contact c. Do not get off the subject d. Do not interrupt, If you must, do so politely e. Lastly, do not monopolize the conversation Remember that conversation is not all oral speech. There are times when silence is the best response. If well timed, it can have more eloquence than speech
  12. 12. Making Introductions In social gatherings, it is good practice to make people know one another by introducing guest or new friends to others When presenting people to one another, you help them start up conversation if, as well as mentioning each person’s name, you add a snippet of information that would get them interested in each other. The following rules governing introductions will aid considerably in making one feel at ease in a group. 1. Present a boy to a girl, the boy does not extend his hand for a handshake unless the girl extends hers first or unless he’s sure the girl will receive it.
  13. 13. 2. A boy always rises when introduced to anyone 3. A younger person is presented to an older person. 4. If both are of the same age, it does not matter Joining Conversation Going along to social gatherings can be harrowing. Often you know few people and find yourself with no one to talk to. You feel you cant seem to connect. In this situation, be confident. Go up to a group of people and join in. In so doing, however, use your common sense.
  14. 14.  If two people are huddled together talking seriously, they are not likely to welcome your intrusion. Before joining, look for signs that a group is ready for a change – space between people, random exchanges with gaps between comments and people looking round the room. Approach boldly. Make steady your contact with the person who looks less involved, smile and ask something like, “Do you mind if I join you?” Leaving Conversation To end a conversation, do so quickly and decisively. This is more polite than to go on exchanging listless comments with a person while your eyes travel the room looking for someone else. At an appropriate moment say “ It’s been interesting talking to you”
  15. 15.  “it’s been pleasure knowing you” or “I’d better go for a mingle” Alternately make an excuse to go to get some food or to find a comfort room. If you are sitting, you can indicate that you wish your conversation to end by standing up telling the other person at the same time how much you have enjoyed his/her company.

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English 3


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