The document discusses the importance of setting healthy boundaries. It defines boundaries as what is you and what is not you, where you end and others begin. Boundaries help keep good things in and bad things out of our lives. The document outlines different types of boundaries, including words, physical distance, time, and emotional distance. It provides tips for setting boundaries, such as clearly communicating them and having a plan to maintain boundaries when others ignore them. Boundaries are necessary for living with peace and benefit both oneself and other people.

1. HEALTHY
BOUNDARIES
~ From Chaos to Serenity ~
Debbie Luxton
Christian Life & Leadership Coach for
BUSY Professional Women
Author, Speaker, Teacher
http://debbieluxton.com
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2. What Does a Boundary Look Like?
Physical / Visible - easy to see and implement
Intangible / Spiritual - can’t see and harder to
implement, but must be just as real
Boundaries Define Us:
What IS you and what is NOT you
Where you END and someone else BEGINS
What you OWN and have RESPONSIBILITY for
We are responsible TO others and FOR ourselves
Boundaries help us keep the GOOD in and the BAD out
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3. Types of Boundaries
Words - most basic boundary setting word is “no”
Physical Distance - removing yourself from a situation
Time - how much you will or won’t give
Emotional Distance - temporary heart protection
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4. Setting Boundaries
Gather information to be considered before deciding
Requires supportive relationships with God and others
Must be clearly communicated and made visible
Secret boundaries breed resentments
Requires honesty - admit your part
Have a plan for your weaknesses or the ignoring of your
boundaries by others
Thoroughly consider your ability to take action
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5. Keep in Mind
It is said that more people suffer from trying to change
others than from any other sickness - it’s impossible.
Respect the boundaries of others
Own what is yours and do not own what belongs to
someone else
You need an accountability partner
Fear is most often the culprit when people can’t or
won’t set boundaries.
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6. Some Boundary Myths
God does not support my setting of boundaries
If I set boundaries, I will hurt others and I will get hurt
Boundaries cause feelings of guilt
When others set boundaries, it injures me
You may be seen as selfish - Not True!
Appropriate boundaries actually increase our ability to
care about others
Being abandoned or attacked by others is a character flaw
of theirs; not yours.
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7. HEALTHY BOUNDARIES
A requirement of They exist for the
living life with benefit of you and
peace and serenity the other person
Healthy Boundaries are NOT an option!
Suggested Reading - Boundaries
by Dr. John Townsend & Dr. Henry Cloud
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