Communcationskills

COMMUNICATION & INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONSHIP AT WORKPLACE
DR SYED ABDULLAH SYED OTHMAN
ASST: MDM FOUZIAH JAMALUDIN
DEANSHIP OF ACADEMIC DEVELOPMENT
NAME:
COLLEGE:

At the end of this workshop, participants should be able to:
1. Explain the meaning of communication
2. List type of Communication Skills
3. Explain the concept, elements and good practices of
Intrapersonal Communication Skills
4. Explain the concept, elements and good practices of
Interpersonal Communication Skills
5. List down effective Interpersonal Skills as an Educator at
Higher Institution of Learning
OUTCOMES OF THIS WORKSHOP
2Comm. skills/10thAPR2013/DADJU

Time Topics Presenter
9.00 – 10.30 am
90 minutes
SESSION 1: INTRAPERSONAL SKILLS
At the end of the session participant will be able to:
2. Define the meaning of intrapersonal communication, its
concept and criteria.
3. Develop effective intrapersonal communication skills as human
being.
Dr Syed Abdullah
ASST
Mdm Fouziah
10.30 – 11.00 am TEA TIME
11.00 – 12.30pm
90 minutes
SESSION 2 : INTERPERSONAL SKILLS AT WORKPLACE
At the end of the session participants should be able to:
1. Define Interpersonal Communication
2. List and describe the Components of Interpersonal
Communication
Dr Syed Abdullah
ASST
Mdm Fouziah
12.30 – 1.00pm PRAYER TIME
1.00 – 2.30 pm
90 minutes
SESSION 3 : INTERPERSONAL SKILLS AT WORKPLACE
(CONT.)
At the end of the session participants should be able to:
1. List and describe challenges in Communication
2. Understand more tips on Interpersonal Communication Skills
Dr Syed Abdullah
ASST
Mdm Fouziah
WORKSHOP SCHEDULE
COMMUNICATION & INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPAT WORKPLACE
Date: 10th April Day: Wednesday
Time: 9.00 – 2.30 Pm Venue: Hayat Hotel

SESSION 1: INTRAPERSONAL SKILLS
At the end of the session participants will be able to:
2. Define the meaning of intrapersonal communication,
its concept and criteria.
3. Describe important factors in effective intrapersonal
communication skills.
Activity:
Discussion on movie clip “ The Edge”

Communication is the sending and receiving of a
message. Communication can occur between one
or many different people.
Communication can take place within just one
individual. This type of communication is called
intrapersonal communication.
Interpersonal communication involves two or
more people.
What is Communication?

Intrapersonal communication
refers to the conversation that is continually going
on in your own mind.
Interpersonal communication
refers to the different types of verbal, non-verbal
and physical actions or expressions that people use
when they communicate with each other.
Intrapersonal & Interpersonal
Mastering the two basic types of communication is
the key to successful socialization.
The ability to communicate ideas, thoughts and
feelings serves as the basis for all successful human
interaction.
Types of Communication

What Is Intrapersonal Communication?
Intrapersonal communication skills are:
• communications that occur within a person's own mind.
• positive internal dialogue, occurring within the mind. Meditation,
prayer, visualization and affirmations are amongst the intrapersonal
techniques.
• the process of talking to oneself, we all have constant internal
dialogues going on within ourselves either consciously or
subconsciously, vital roles in determining our self-esteem and self-
perception. If you apply yourself, it is improving your confidence
and therefore your quality of life.

IMPORTANT FACTORS THAT INFLUENCE
INTRAPERSONAL SKILLS
1. Perspective
2. Self-esteem
3. Self-confidence
4. Self-assertive

1. PERSPECTIVE
• Perspective is a view or belief which we truly
believe it is true and valuable in our life
• Perspective is the way we look at things
• Knowledge, understanding and values in our
minds shape our perspectives or philosophies or
paradigms
• IN RELATIONSHIP, IT IS BETTER TO BE KIND THAN
TO BE RIGHT!

THE WAY WE THINK
• The way we think influence our perspectives in
life
• Positive thoughts will produce positive
perspectives in life
• Positive perspectives are able to produce positive
actions
• Positive perspectives are able to produce positive
communication and interpersonal relationship

WHAT IS SHAPING
OUR MINDS?
EXPERIENCE /
EFFECTS WE SEE
OBSERVATION
KNOWLEDGE/INFORMATION
VALUE
SYSTEM
PEOPLE
INFLUENCE
INFLUENCE OF
MODELING
EDUCATION
ENVIRONMENTAL
INFLUENCE
PERCEIVED
AUTHORITY
** BRIGHT STUDENT
**PROCESSIONARY CATERPILLAR

EVERY ACTION WE TAKE IS ACTUALLY A REFLECTION OF
OUR PERSPECTIVE
•The Way We Use Our Time, Money And
Energy
•With Whom We Normally Socialize Or Get
Along With
•What Kind Of Food We Eat
•What Kind Of Books We Read
•What Kind Of Activities We Give Priorities
•How We Communicate With People
•How We React And Take Actions When We
Are Facing Difficulties And Problems

2. SELF-ESTEEM
HOW WE LOOK AT OURSELVES:
In a positive or negative manner…
In the form of strengths or form of weaknesses…..
With appreciating your capabilities or undermining
yourselves….
With the feeling you can be successful or weak without
energy….

WHY HAVING HIGH SELF-ESTEEM IS IMPORTANT?
• Solid and good self-esteem will give us strength to
shape our lives the best we can
• Poor and bad self-esteem will lead to a lot of
weaknesses in life
• WHO AM I?
The Answer To This Question Will Influence One’s
Self-esteem And Influence The Actions We Take In
Our Life

WHO AM I?
MY IDENTITY! MY IMAGE!
• I am a good human being.
• I am a responsible person / son
/ parents / employee
• I am a loving
(husband/wife/parents)
• I am a useful member of this
society
• I am a responsible and
dedicated staff/ manager who
is well-organized

WAYS TO BUILD HIGH SELF-ESTEEM
• Always remember you have the capability, role and
achievement
• Should interact with those who have positive minds
and who always encourage positive actions
• Should take positive actions which bring goodness
to yourself and society

3. SELF-CONFIDENCE
• HIGH SELF-CONFIDENCE will help us take actions
based on perspectives and values we hold
• HIGH SELF-CONFIDENCE gives us strengths to
achieve the goals we set in our life

Building Self-Confidence 1-3/9
1. You must feel that you are somebody – used to be
successful, have talent and capabilities, used to contribute
something meaningful to society
• Do not feel that other people are too superior – they are
also normal human beings that shouldn’t be scared of
2. Must practice to give opinions even though you may make
mistakes or you don’t have much points to say
• Must try to get small things done until successful - because
small success could lead in getting bigger success
3. Must try to do high risk work – which have big challenge so
as to train yourself to fight feeling of scared or no confidence

4. When you have clear objectives, clear values, clear ways of
doing things– dont worry about complaints, negative
comments and opinions of other people – go ahead with
your work – do it the best possible way you can
5.Seek support from positive people, successful people, not
those who are only talkers, nothing accomplished, negative
people who don’t like to see other people become
successful.
6. Be careful in choosing friends – do not be affected by the
negative comments or bad influence or bad models.
Prolonged exposure to negative elements will influence your
mind and your soul and finally you will fall in their trap of
negativity and non-performance.

7. Get yourself used to do a lot of welfare work to build strong
mind, soul and character – so that this way you wont be easily
influenced in negativity or bad behavior – you get yourselves
more confidence and becoming more useful.
8. Must try to fight feeling ashamed or scared or doesn’t want to
work
• Do not propose other people to volunteer – must propose your
own self to volunteer to take part
9. Must try to think and find creative ways to solve problems – do
not surrender to circumstances

4. SELF-ASSERTIVE
• The capability to take a stand and take appropriate actions
in defending perspectives and positive values which you
strongly believe
• Determination, patience and courage are the only things
needed to improve any situation
• WAYS TO BUILD SELF-ASSERTIVENESS
• Understand clearly the good and bad aspects of anything
• Be firm if they try to take advantage of you
• Behold strictly to values, ethics and rules which you
strongly believe

CONCLUSION
Alquran: 13: 11“ ……Indeed, Allah will not change the condition of a
people until they change what is in themselves….”
Anthony Robbins: Communication Quotations
The way we communicate with others and with ourselves
ultimately determines the quality of our lives.
Winston Churchill: Communication Quotes
Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also
what it takes to sit down and listen
Denis Waitley : Quotes: Self Esteem
To establish true self-esteem we must concentrate on our
successes and forget about the failures and the negatives in our
lives

ONLY WE CAN CHANGE OURSELVES
• Nobody will be able to change us to get better
results, except we ourselves.
• For things to change, we have to change first.
• Good news: once we start changing ourselves,
things will start to change for us.
• Our life is our responsibility, so we are responsible
totally for our life.

SESSION 2: INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION
SKILLS
At the end of the session participants should be
able to:
• Define Interpersonal Communication
• List and describe the Components of
Interpersonal Communication skills

DEFINITION OF INTERPERSONAL
COMMUNICATION
• Communication is a process of
delivering a message or
meaning through verbal or non-
verbal means

PERSPECTIVE OF INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION
• The Quality Of Our Interpersonal Communication
Will Determine The Quality Of Our Work And Quality
Of Our Life
• Interpersonal Communication Skills Can Be Learned

COMPONENTS OF INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION
1. Conversation
2. Listening
3. Body language
4. Environment
5. Self-appearance

1. CONVERSATION
• Mention Their Names
• Use Suitable Language
• Tone Of Voice
• Simplify Your Message
• Give Other People The Chance To Talk And Do Not
Control All
• Try To Control From Telling Too Much About Yourself
• Use Closed And Open Questions Properly
• Contents Of Your Sentence
• Suitability Of Topics To Talk
• Winning People’s Heart
Be Interesting Vs. Be Interested

THE WAY TO CONVERSE
• Be confident, cool and relaxed
• Be yourself – do not belittle yourself but at the
same do not be arrogant – must show respect to
all parties
• Be assertive – do not let other people step on
your head
• Give your opinion if you don’t agree – with full of
diplomacy and respect

2. LISTENING SKILLS
 Look at the eyes and give attention But do not do it too close or too long
 Show your interest and show that they are important
 Concentrate – do not let your mind wonder to other places. Do not look at other places or do
other things while listening to people talking to you
 Show that you are actually listening to them with full interest by saying ‘yeah’ ‘oh like that’,
nodding your head and continue eye contact.
 Do not look at different direction
 Ensure that you really understand what you have just heard by repeating what you have
heard to him / her.
 Repeat important information and seek confirmation from her “Is this what you are trying
say……”
 Give encouragement for people to keep on talking or to tell you more using phrases such as
‘that’s amazing idea, that’s interesting story, please tell me more’
 Listen to ideas, not just words. Form imagination in your mind while listening.
 Do not interrupt or try to finish his sentence while people are talking to you. Wait until he or
she finishes his or her sentences.
 Do not be too fast to conclude. Give your response when you are truly sure he’s finished his
points.
 Do not focus on what you are going to say, focus on what your friend is going to say first.

3. BODY LANGUAGE
 PROPER BODY LANGUAGE
Smile or show happy face
Nod your head to show that you understand or agree or you are following the
conversation attentively.
Give space so that everyone can see each other’s face if you are talking in a group.
 GOOD BODY LANGUAGE
“Mirroring” is you create the same body posture with those you are talking to – if
they are standing with one leg up, you do the same, if they are holding cup, you
do the same. This is called mirroring.
“Mirroring” will create a more friendly and relaxed atmosphere between you and
the other person.
Avoid from:
• Yawning,
• Scratching your head,
• Drilling your nostrils,
• Digging your ears, and all sort of inappropriate actions

4. ENVIRONMENT
 Try to understand their mood (are they tired, have many problems,
after getting scolded from their boss, feeling sad, mixed feeling
etc.)
 Look at suitability of topic at that moment (talking about marriage
to women who haven’t got married, talking about child birth with
the couple who don’t have kids yet etc.)
 Find suitable place (eg. quite, not many people around) for the
topic you want to discuss. To discuss multi-million dollar business
deal, must find a suitable place.
 Find suitable environment (cold, not smelly, refreshing, clean)

5. SELF APPEARANCE
• The way you dress
• Cleanliness
• Color of your dress
• Ornaments
• Body smell

SESSION 3: INTERPERSONAL
COMMUNICATION SKILLS (Cont.)
At the end of the session participants should be
able to:
1.List and describe challenges in Interpersonal
Communication
2.Important tips on Interpersonal Relationship

CHALLENGES IN COMMUNICATION
MISUNDERSTANDING IN COMMUNICATION
might happen in:
– Through telephone
– SMS
– Emails
– News delivered through third party, fourth- include fasiq people –
surah alhujurat
• When talking always want to win or be superior
• When talking, emotion is more than facts
• When giving opinions, very fast in finding other people’s faults
• When asking questions, the intention is to test the people
• When talking, always want to make other people feel guilty
• When talking, very arrogant, big talk and belittle other people.

CHALLENGES IN COMMUNICATION
Normally, most people don’t want the following:
ONE WAY COMMUNICATION – do not give chance to other people to talk.
• Pestered – just like being pushy.
• Dictated – like to control.
• Imposed – give one-sided point of view.
• Insisted – do not give much choices.
• Manipulation– salesmen, bad leaders
• He feel he’s the only one who’s right and other people do not know anything.
JADDAL KALAMI – debating without proper guidelines, attack one’s arguments, no
ethics in discussion, no good intention
• Discussion not for the sake of finding proper understanding or to find the truths
• Discussion to hurt other people’s feelings
• Arguments just for fun –no objective, waste of time hurt the feeling, no barakah
• Provoke heated arguments, spoil the good mood, break friendship

More examples of Barriers to
communication
• Language
• Values and beliefs
• Sex/gender and age
• Economic status
• Educational level
• Physical barriers
• Attitude
• Timing
• Understanding of message
• Trust

IMPORTANT TIPS ON INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP
BASICS – MANKIND
WANTS
• To be respected
• To be appreciated
• To feel important
• To play some roles
• To be friends with others
• Win-win – enjoy their
rights
BASICS – MANKIND DO
NOT WANT
• To be ridiculed
• Belittled
• Neglected
• Segregated
• Cruelled
• Underestimated
• Mistreated

1. REMEMBER HIS NAME AND RELATED INFORMATION
Remember his name correctly and mention his name in the conversation
Try to remember other important or relevant information about him such as the
number of cats he keep, countries he has visited, his favorite food etc.
2. LOOK AT THE GOOD SIDE AND GIVE EMPATHY
Look at the good side and strength he has; do not look at his weaknesses and
shortcomings
Inculcate sympathy and empathy; try to understand his situation; do not quickly put
a blame on him; do not quickly make a conclusion about him and give forgiveness on
small things
Investigate first on what’s happened. Do not conclude too fast
Give open arms and put no ill intention toward him.
3. THINK WIN-WIN
Think win-win. Be fair to all parties.
Never ever suppress other people
Never try to take advantage, especially from the weaker party.

4. DO NOT KEEP HIDDEN AGENDA OR TRY TO TAKE ADVANTAGE
• Do not keep the “prawn besides the stone” (hidden agenda) when dealing with
him; this way you will lose trust from him
• Do not take advantage on his weaknesses or his negligence or his sincerity
5. DO NOT ‘KILL’ HIS LIFE AND DO FITNAH
• Never ever ‘kill’ one’s life, dignity or his existence by spreading fitnah
• Stay away from fitnah or plough the seed of hatred or ill-intention toward a
person.
6. NEVER EVER COMPARE, PAY GRATITUDE WITH WHAT YOU HAVE
• Do not compare someone with someone else, our staff with other people staff,
our husband/wife with other people’s husband/wife
• Do not praise other people and undermine your own relatives
• Have to pay gratitude and appreciate what you have or possess
• Keep in mind - you are my hero or you are my heroine

7. GIVE INSPIRATION, EXPECT THE BEST
 Give inspiration, give trust, give hope
 Give motivation to be the best, to give their best
 Must expect the best from them
 Be patient with their shortcomings and find ways so that they can improve
themselves – through coaching, training or third party’s roles
8.NEVER EVER LIE
 Speak the truth – never ever lie
 Never manipulate your language or twist your tongue, doing so will make
you a hypocrite
9. FULFILL YOUR PROMISE DO NOT MAKE FALSE PROMISE
 Must respect the promise you have made – must fulfill it
 Do not promise with the things you are not capable of doing

10.SOMETIMES WE ARE STRATEGIC,NOT HYPOCRITE
 We cannot be open to all things because it could be not strategic
 Have to see the pros and cons of the things we discussed
 If it carries more disadvantages than advantages, so it is better to avoid from being direct
– this is what is called strategic.
11. LIKEABLE AND LIKE
 Make it a habit to always eliminate the bad elements in our life
 Improve yourself so that people like you
 Train yourself to like other people
12. EXPECTATION
 Sometimes our expectation on other people are not realistic or too high
 All people have problems or circumstances which we do not know
 We shouldn’t be asking from them more than what they are capable of doing
 Expectation which is too high might frustrate us
13. DON’T HOPE FOR RETURN OF FAVOR
 Continue with good relationship without hoping anything in return
 Even though people do not give a damn, we continue with good relationship with them
 If we are hoping for a return of favor, maybe we will be frustrated
 If we do not hope anything in favor, they will feel the true pleasure of friendship

FRIENDSHIP
SPOILERS
• Have strong vested
interest
• Like to take advantag
• High expectation
• Blame without
investigation
• Lying when speaking
• Back biting
• Take his rights
ENHANCERS
• Good intention
• Always helping
• Keep his dignity
• See the good aspects
than the bad aspects
• No hidden agenda
• Telling the truth and be
trustworthy
• Give priority to a
friend

RECAP & CONCLUSION
44
Thanks for your patience, we have covered the following topics:
1. The meaning of communication
2. Types of Communication Skills
3. Concept, elements and good practices of Intrapersonal
Communication Skills
4. Concept, elements and good practices of Interpersonal
Communication Skills
5. How to implement effective Interpersonal Skills as an Educator at
Higher Institution of Learning
6. Mastering the two basic types of communication is the key to
successful socialization.
7. The ability to communicate ideas, thoughts and feelings serves as
the basis for all successful human interaction.
Comm. skills/10thAPR2013/DADJU

…in the new global and diverse
workplace requires
excellent communication skills!
Success for YOU…

1. http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/interpersonal-
communication.html#ixzz2PJPQO6KY
2. http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/interpersonal-
communication.html
3. http://www.faculty.londondeanery.ac.uk/e-
learning/improve-your-lecturing/what-makes-a-good-
lecturer
4. http://interpersonalskillsonline.com/how-to-develop-
interpersonal-skills
REFERENCES

THAT’S ALL.
THANK YOU
ALL THE BEST
FROM:
DR. SYED ABDULLAH drsyed@yahoo.com
Facebook: syed abdullah shahabudin
MDM. FOUZIAH JAMALUDIN fouziah5959@yahoo.com

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